A Heart Divided (Rory's Choice Book One)

By Janelle Evans

Rory’s decision to befriend the new fifteen-year-old neighbor boy, and their secret relationship is the catalyst for all kinds of changes—causing her to fight for what she wants. The boy presence brings to light rumors swirling in the town about Rory’s beloved father. As she peels back the layers—separating fact from fiction—her father’s tortured past come to light. These revelations show her how complicated doing the right thing can get. When her secret relationship with the boy is revealed, she is forced to face the rumor-mill herself. The snide comments don’t hurt near as much when she’s dipped into her first kiss.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ink & Quill Publishers
• Release date: Apr 28, 2017
• ISBN: 9781941271254

Janelle Evans

A theatre major from Southern Utah University, Janelle Evans is a consummate drama queen. Though her days on the stage are far behind her now, she still enjoys live theatre and great books. Young adult novels are her favorite genre to write and read. She lives in Rock Springs, Wyoming with her husband and three children.

Book preview

Chapter 1 The Wedge Born Between Us

With the mare's head cradled on my lap, I wished for the bed I'd been awakened from. Daddy's grunts, combined with a squishy sucking sound coming from the other end of the horse, made my stomach queasy. I'd never ask to leave the birthing stall though. Daddy needed me.

Rory, come here, he said.

I lifted with all my twelve-year-old strength, but couldn't move the sweat covered head from my lap. I can't.

Hooking me from behind, Daddy brought me to my feet dragging me past the mare. I pressed my face against his arm— not wanting to see the gruesome things I'd heard. He shoved me out in front of him.

After hours of struggle, I figured there would be nothing but a lifeless foal left. But the dark regal creature before me, so unlike the light dun color of his mother, was far from dead.

Clean him up, Daddy said.

My reflexes blocked the cloth he threw. I picked up the towel lying at my feet. Sorry, I wasn't watching. I noticed my father's white face. Dad?

He needs to stand. His hollow eyes turned to the mare. Beyond him, she lay spent from all her effort, her swollen abdomen rising and falling. I wrung the towel in my hands. My eyes drawn to the blood covered hay strewn across the wooden floor and her haunches.

Are you sure?

He charged forward, fists clenched. Just do it! No more questions!

Backpedaling away from his unexpected anger, I cowered near the foal.

He rubbed his eyes and groaned, letting his shoulders slump forward. Dee-Dee, please. For once, do as you're told.

Okay, I whispered, stunned. I didn't know anyone named Dee-Dee. Yet Daddy was so unlike himself, how could I tell him he had called me the wrong name?

Afraid he might yell again, I scrubbed the colt long after the task was finished. With his back to me, I watched him remove the mare's halter before whispering something in her ear. He sat back on his heels, humming and caressing his hands down her neck. He'd always had a kind touch, but I had never seen him love on an animal like this before.

Dad? I said, approaching with cautious steps.

The sound stopped, but he didn't turn around. Take him. But, dad, take him where? Pale faced, he looked at the colt then shrugged. Sable's gone. Take care of him if you want him to live.

Of course I took him—he was just a baby—but my relationship with Daddy was never the same.

Chapter 2 A Birthday Gift Worth Repeating…Over and Over Again

Scared but determined, I stood inside the makeshift arena in front of my house, checking Duke's cinch one more time. I knew the risk. Daddy wouldn't be happy. He never was when it came to my horse. But Duke was almost three, and I was fifteen years old today. My sister Robbi had been much younger when she started barrel racing. All I wanted was a chance to prove I could.

The three fifty-gallon practice barrels at the opposite end of the arena rested on the corners of the imaginary triangle where I had placed them. It was good their top ridges were covered in foam. Not that I was that worried. Duke and I had spent many hours practicing near the lake, high above in the mountain behind my home. But rocks, bushes, and trees, weren't barrels. Once we got the hang of it, we would be able to go much faster here.

I released the breath I'd been holding and heaved myself into the saddle. Okay baby. Let's go introduce ourselves. I glanced up the hill at the windows of our old farmhouse, ensuring no one was watching, before nudging him into motion with my heels. For now, I wanted no witnesses.

Drawing him toward the left barrel, we circling it counterclock-wise. I kept the reins loose, letting him have his head. That's right, look at it.

He lowered his nose and sniffed.

Good. No! I pulled the reins, jerking his head away before he took a bite. The foam on top is not food. It's there to protect you silly.

Once I felt sure he was comfortable, I clicked my tongue and dug my heels into his sides even harder. He picked up the pace.

I pulled him to the left of the second barrel, circling it clockwise. His head and neck drew past, curving around the drum. I squeezed my left leg into his side. Duke executed the command perfectly, digging in his front legs. His body and rear legs curved round, in line now for the barrel at the top of the triangle formation.

A hiss of excitement escaped my lips, when I saw that last barrel.

Knocked back by Duke's sudden spring forward, I grabbed the horn just in time. With the ease and agility of a seasoned competitor, he spun clockwise past the third. He popped out of his spin, stretched his front hooves forward and dug in, gaining speed for the sprint back to the finish line.

I laughed, my head swimming when we stopped. I guess I should be more careful when giving you a command.

What you doing? Robbi asked behind me.

Gah! I flinched and twisted in the saddle to find her leaning against one of the decaying railroad ties standing as a fence post for the arena entrance Why do you have to be so sneaky?

I'm not the one being sneaky, Rory.

Great! My private moment of happiness—squashed by the one person I didn't want to see. I hadn't convinced Daddy to let me ride yet. She would make convincing Daddy all that much harder.

I climbed off Duke and pulled the reins with me, keeping him between us. I'm just playing around, waiting for Dad, that's all. My voice sounded whiney and weak, even to my ears. And I hated it.

Uh-huh. Right Rory. And my barrels just happen to be here. These weren't just her barrels. Her name couldn't be found on them anywhere, but pointing that out wouldn't exactly help my cause. Well, no, but I didn't think it would hurt anything if I used them.

Do I look stupid to you? Robbi advanced forward, pushing Duke back.

No. Yes, she sometimes did look stupid, but again, that would only get me hit. The look on her face said she wouldn't need much of a reason.

Now with nothing between us, I twisted the reins around my hand, preparing for the inevitable fight. We were just practicing. That's all.

What are you practicing for? You know Dad will never let you ride.

Why not? I jutted my chin out. He lets you. That's because I'm good and you're not. She reached for Duke's bridle.

With his ears pinned back he snapped in her direction. Jerking her hand out of his reach, she slapped him on the nose. "I doubt your crazy horse is even capable of running the barrels. You did train him yourself." Robbi grabbed Duke's bridle beneath his chin, where his teeth couldn't reach and squeezed.

Stop that, I said, pushing at her. You're hurting him. Placing her other hand on my shoulder, she kept her arm straight and laughed at my futile attempts to move her. You know I wouldn't have to hurt him if you'd done a better job of training him.

I have trained him. He's a better horse than Pixie and Cricket combined. I slapped her arm with the reins and we both gasped.

Robbi smirked and grabbed my hand. Really. Well, I guess I should be the one to ride him then. After all, I am the one with the experience here. She crushed my fingers.

No. I refused to yelp in pain from her tightening grip. I'm going to ride him.

Rory, go sit on the fence. Now! Robbi said, so intent on me she missed the slight jerk of Duke's head.

His gesture said it all. He wanted me to let her ride him.

Poised for the fight, he stood still, every muscle ridged. Who am I to disagree?

Fine, I said to her. You can ride him.

She released her hold on my hand and took the reins. That's right. Let me show you how it's done.

Brushing past Robbi, I ducked under Duke's head, giving him a quick hug around his neck. Man, I hope he understood he couldn't kill her. Daddy wouldn't understand.

From the top of a metal panel, I watched Robbi check the cinch. Duke didn't move at all, even when she moved near his mouth, adjusting the bridle and reins. Finally satisfied, Robbi put her foot through the stirrup and popped into the saddle.

Get up. Robbi kicked.

He didn't flinch.

Go. Now! She kicked even harder.

Duke dropped his head.

Exhaling, Robbi turned to me. "I have to say you've really trained him well. Your retard horse isn't moving."

With ears turned back, I watched Duke's jaw tighten, clamping the bit in his mouth.

Maybe you should try hissing, I offered.

Really, you watch too many old westerns, a hiss— I marveled at the speed my horse shut Robbi up. She fell backwards, but sadly, managed to right herself in the saddle. Duke curved around the left barrel just like we'd practiced, then leaned in hard. Using Robbi's leg, he knocked the barrel to the ground, and then shot forward again. He widened his arch around the second drum and brushed the fence, dragging Robbi's leg between his body and the metal panel.

Robbi gasped in pain, but didn't let go.

With a snort, he charged the last barrel head on.

Stop! Stop! She screamed yanking on the reins.

Only inches from the barrel, Duke locked up his legs and dropped his butt, sliding to a stop. Over the horn of the saddle my sister flew, smacking her face into his neck. He trotted back to the finish line with a slightly damaged Robbi on his back.

Bent over, she held a bloody nose with one hand and the other pressed against her stomach.

You okay, Duke? I said still perched on the fence.

Duke? Who cares about Duke? Look at me! She pointed at her face. Blood oozed from her nose.

Oh yeah. You know, Duke's sometimes temperamental, but he was just playing. He didn't mean anything by it.

Robbi slid off my horse. Yeah, well I'm feeling temperamental now. How about I give you a bloody nose? Rubbing her leg, she limped over in my direction. You won't mind since we're just playing.

Aw, come on, Robin, don't be mad. I'll get you some ice if you want. I dropped over the other side of the fence, putting distance between us.

I'm gonna kick your butt when I catch you. She limp-ran, heading for the entrance of the arena.

I sprinted for the house. Man, the front door better be unlocked. With my stubby legs, Robbi would easily catch me if I ran for the back.

The sound of our old F-350 truck, going way too fast up our dirt lane, halted my retreat. Spinning around, I saw Daddy behind the wheel with Ryan in the passenger seat.

Waiting on the opposite side of the road, Robbi mouthed, you're dead.

Yeah, like I didn't know that. Should I run for it while Daddy passed? I might have enough time to hide then.

Before I could decide, the truck stopped between us with the windows down. Hey you two, saddle up, Daddy said. The bulls broke through the northern fence—what in the world happened to you Robbi?

She jabbed a finger in my direction. Rory's stupid!—

How far do you think the bulls are now? I interrupted. I can go after them.

Rory, you're not going to distract me. Daddy pinched his nose and sighed. I don't have time for this. Ryan and I cannot do this alone.

Yeah, Ryan chimed in.

Shut up, Ryan. Crackin' a joke right now will not make it better. Daddy leaned out the window and grabbed Robbi's chin. Well it don't look broken. Go in the house and get cleaned up. We'll have to talk about this later.

Fine, Robbi said, glaring across the truck at me. I'll be sure to remind you.

The farther away from Robbi I got, the longer I would live. Dad, Duke's already saddled. Where would you like me to go? Robbi pointed to the barrels in the arena. "You need to put those back where you found them first."

Robbi, Daddy chided. The barrels aren't going to move, but the bulls will. Rory can clean them up later. Leaning across Ryan, he pointed his finger at me. Wait for your sister, you'll ride together. Now, both of you move! He gunned the truck forward, leaving Robbi and me in a wake of dust.

I kept my head down and crossed the road, avoiding eye contact with Robbi.

She hooked my arm when I neared. I never forget. She whispered, then let go.

Neither would I. The consequences were sure to be painful, but watching Duke make a fool out of her had been worth it. He could give her a weekly ride if he wanted to. The idea made me smile all the way back to my horse.

Come on, baby. Daddy needs us. Gathering the reins in my hands, I hooked my foot in the stirrup, but the sound of another vehicle on our private road stopped me. Coming down the lane was a white county pickup truck. The word Sheriff stood out in bold black letters on its side.

Great! I huffed, climbing into the saddle. The bulls must be on someone's property and they called the police. Daddy would be thrilled.

The sheriff drove to the back of the house. Definitely business. Everyone knew to use the front door if you were here for a social visit.

Trotting up the lane, I rounded the house and saw Sheriff Coalton, dressed in his brown county uniform, leaning on the tailgate of his truck.

Morning, Rory. He smiled at me, tapping a large yellow envelope on his thigh. Where's your father? His smile didn't make him look any friendlier. More like a shark, with big teeth and beady eyes.

Uh, sheriff. I fiddled with my reins, looking anywhere but at him. I think he went inside. But we already know the bulls are out. We're gonna go get them now.

Your bulls are out? He clicked his tongue and tipped his cowboy hat back. Looks like it's gonna be one of those days for Daniel.

It sounded like he was making fun of Daddy, but I didn't dare tell him to stop. Daddy drilled us constantly about respecting authority figures.

Sheriff, Daddy said, walking out of the barn. What can I do for you?

Daniel. I came out to give you this. No longer smiling, the sheriff touched the envelope now tucked under his arm.

Daddy folded his arms over his chest. Maybe you should give it to me then.

Pushing off his truck, the sheriff adjusted his hat. First I want to talk to you. Now me and Lynn, we go way back. I still consider her family and I hate to see her hurt.

Yeah, yeah. Daddy sounded exasperated. We both know you grew up with my wife. What do you want?

I'm getting to that part, if you'll just give me a minute. He continued to fidget with his belt and hat. Do you have your firearm on ya?

Todd, you know I always carry it. Daddy twisted, showing his belted holster to the sheriff. Is somebody dead I don't know about?

No. The sheriff sighed. Look, we both know you have a temper. I wanna make sure you don't shoot me first and ask questions later, if I could just hold your gun for now.

I'm not giving you my gun. Daddy glanced at me. Rory, I think you better help your brother finish saddling the horses.

I would have rather stayed and protected Daddy, but I didn't dare disobey a direct order. Okay. I kicked Duke into a walk.

Like a gunfight in the old west, both men stood frozen about ten paces apart. Daddy stayed tall, his arms still crossed. The sheriff, however, seemed skittish. He leaned forward on the balls of his feet, as if he was preparing to jump for cover.

When I passed Daddy, he stopped Duke, pulled his handgun from his belt, and handed it to me. Put it in my saddle. He slapped my horse into motion. There. I don't have a gun. You want to tell me what this is all about?

Chapter 3 It's My Birthday, But Not The Gift I Wanted

Ryan and I pressed ourselves against the edge of the barn door listening.

I got five bucks that says Dad kicks Todd Coalton's butt, he whispered before sticking his head out the open barn door.

I don't care, I whispered back wishing he'd move, so I could see too.

Something slapped the ground. Oh man, did he hit him? The curiosity was more than I could bear. I leaned around Ryan and peeked out. Both men stood nose to nose. Neither of them looked like they'd been hit, but the envelope lay on the ground between them.

Who filed this complaint? Daddy said.

If you'll just look at the papers it'll tell you who. But since you're being stubborn, it's your new neighbor, Rodger Kelly Jr.

Rodger Kelly Jr.? I knew that name. The people in town had been buzzing about him for weeks—something about him coming back here after leaving twenty-five years ago with a whiney city wife in tow.

You mean old man Kelly's son! Daddy was beyond control now, shouting louder than I'd heard from him in a long time.

Sheriff pulled himself up to his full height, and placed his hands on his belt. Look, you just have to go down to the court house within twenty days and answer to the charges. Oooh, Daddy jabbed himself in the chest with his pointer finger. I have an answer for my new neighbor but I won't be going through the court house to say it!

The back screen slammed. Daniel! Todd! What is going on out here? Mom walked down the porch, her stern 'look', usually reserved for us kids, in place.

Well Lynn, it seems our neighbor has decided the water in the north field belongs to him. Daddy pointed at the papers on the ground. But rather than tell me about it, he sues me instead. Mom gasped and turned to the sheriff. Why would he say that? My Daddy always used the water in that field. This has to be a mistake.

I don't know, but I had to serve you with the papers. I didn't like the whole contrite tone the sheriff was using, it sounded phony to me.

It's the law. I'm real sorry about all of this. Ooo, I liked it even less when he took my mother's hand. Maybe you should get a lawyer. Daddy looked even less pleased about him touching Mom, his fists clenched at his sides. Really Todd? A lawyer? Or are you referring to your lawyer brother who just happens to live in town again? Let me guess. You want to leave us with his number.

You know Todd, you need to go. Mom extracted her hand from the sheriff's, scooped up the yellow envelope, and dragged Daddy toward the house. You did your job, its fine. I'm sure the city of Pinedale is in need of their elected official. Please excuse us.

Todd Coalton waited until my parents were inside before climbing into his truck.

Circling the loop of our driveway, he raised his hat and sneered when he passed the open barn door where I stood.

I kept my hands in my pockets rather than acknowledge his gesture.

Jeez, Mom, you shouldn't have stopped the fight. That jerk had wanted Daddy to hit him. Standing there with his chin jutted out like a bull's-eye, taunting Daddy. He deserved to get punched.

Rory! Ryan shouted. Are you listening to me? Startled, I looked over my shoulder.

Get Pixie together. Ryan handed me her bridle. We still have to get the bulls, remember?

Oh, yeah. I walked over to the horse, but noticed Ryan stayed by the door. Aren't you going inside to get Dad? Rory, do I look stupid to you? Once again the answer was yes. As twins, he and Robbi must share the same brain. If I told him, he'd hit me too, so I lied. No, but someone has to get him.

When you're finished with Pixie, you go get him. If you don't come back it'll be okay. What a terrible loss it would be for the world to lose someone like me. Ryan finished with his hand over his heart.

Fine. Chicken!

We were saddled and ready, faster than I anticipated, with 'lightning speed' as far as my courage went. I looked over my shoulder before opening the back door.

Ryan stayed by the horses mouthing, Go, go, go.

Chicken! Chicken! Chicken!

Inside the door, I hesitated. Dad? Mom? The horses are ready.

On the kitchen table lay the documents delivered by the good sheriff, 'just doing his job'. In bold letters the top page read, Greetings from the state of Wyoming.

Yeah, I muttered. That's like saying Merry Christmas! Now here's your lump of coal.

We're coming dear, Mom called from around the corner. Right before Daddy rounded the doorframe followed by Mom and Robbi, I jumped back and smiled. He'd skin me if he knew I'd been snooping.

Set and focused, Daddy's face showed no anger from the earlier argument with the sheriff. Okay, Rory. Here's a walkietalkie. You and Robbi check in every fifteen minutes, and stay together. Do you hear me?

Yeah, Dad. I took the device. Where we headed? "Take the trail at the back of the barn. Go up the mountain to the first ridge then move north. I'm hoping all seven bulls have backtracked into our property. Do not cross into our neighbor's land. We're having enough trouble with them as it is right now.

Push them into Robbi's arena rather than the north field."

Robbi gasped, but Daddy cut her off before she could start. We'll make a more permanent place to keep them later. I'm not keeping anything in the north field until the water is settled. Daddy looked at Mom. I won't have people thinking I'm a thief.

Outside, we all grabbed our mounts, Ryan with Tonto, Robbi took Cricket, and Daddy had Pixie, with me on Duke. Mom hopped into the truck and waited.

Go with the girls, but stay below the ridge, Daddy said circling Pixie around to Ryan. I'll catch up with you after I show your mother where the break in the fence is. He trotted over to Mom in the truck. Are you sure you can handle the fence? Mom didn't say anything, but her lopsided smirk was hard to miss.

I know, I know, stupid question. Daddy kicked Pixie into a canter yelling over his shoulder. Remember. Check-in every fifteen minutes.

I ended up sandwiched between the twins, never an easy thing to endure. Afraid to touch either of them, I squeezed my knees into the saddle.

Man, Dad should have laid Todd Coalton out! Ryan said jabbing the air in front of him. I bet it would only take one punch. All cops are territory tyrants anyway. Probably trained that way before they take the badge—like an oath or something.

Yeah, but he didn't act that way toward Mom.

Oh please, Robbi said, throwing in her two cents when she could have just left well enough alone. You don't like him because he gave you a ticket last year and Daddy made you muck the stalls out for a month all by yourself as punishment. With a smug smile, she leaned over. Actually, I'm surprised Dad didn't ream you guys for watching today. You know someone should remind him. She flipped her ponytail, and punched me in the arm, saying to Ryan, "At least you'll have help this time when you clean the stalls out."

Staying clear of their eternal struggle for supremacy, I ignored the pain in my arm and kept my head forward. Ryan or Robbi, no matter who won, I'd be squashed at the bottom when they were done. Though I did prefer Ryan's 'equal opportunity' teasing to Robbi's hateful bashing.

Oh, you mean just like you? Ryan chuckled when she gasped. How else could you know we were watching? He laughed harder when Robbi narrowed her eyes. Yes, once again Blondie, you need to think it through before trying to threaten me.

I just love the way Antonia's coat shines in the sun. She threw back at him, laughing when Ryan gave her the scowling reaction she was looking for. It was an old argument, but as long as it kept needling him, she'd never let it go.

Tonto. My horse's name is Tonto.

"I don't know why you insist upon that stupid name. Anyone who looks can tell she isn't a he—Blondie."

He stood in his stirrups. You know I didn't want a mare, but she's what I got for Christmas. Would you tell Dad to take her back? Besides, her papered name, 'Antonia of The Dawn', is a mouthful. Tonto's better, so shut up. Ryan clicked his tongue, dropping back into his saddle with a huff.

I'd tell you to take Duke. Robbi pointed at me. But I think Rory needs a sturdy male to hold her up,

Oh, come on! I don't want to be a part of your fight.

Duke should have been mine anyway, he muttered. If I hadn't left that night to get the vet, he would've been.

Of all the regurgitated arguments they had, I hated this one most of all, and the guilt I felt every time they brought it up. Duke should have been his, but I couldn't give him up. Sorry, Ryan—

Forget it. He wouldn't be any good to me now. You've ruined him. He jabbed me in the other arm. "Likes you too much."

I tried telling Robbi that this morning. I grumbled, forgetting how close Ryan was.

He burst out laughing, slapping his leg. Is that what happened to her nose? Robbi tried to ride Duke. I knew you were blonde, but come on. Duke?

Kicking Cricket, Robbi rode away without a backward glance. Shouting after her, Ryan said, Oh man, I would have loved to have seen that!

Great! He pissed her off. The best thing for my health would be to let her cool off alone. Except, if I didn't catch her, I'd be in bigger trouble with Daddy. Resigned to my fate, I took off after her, leaving Ryan to whoop it up in his saddle alone.

Chapter 4 Wishing For A Re-Gift From My Horse

With the one-word-answer queen as my partner, the hours spent searching for bulls wore on my patience. I waited for her monotone answer to explode into the fight I saw brewing in her eyes.

Robin. Let's push to the next ravine then head back. Fine. She replied.

Agh! Just get it over with, I can't take it anymore. Robin— The call signal from walkie-talkie interrupted my suicide speech. I strangled it instead. Rory here.

We found the last one. Through the speaker, Daddy's voice sounded tired. Where you at?

I scanned the surrounding woods before answering, Near the BLM property line.

Okay, we'll see you in about fifteen minutes.

I didn't bother relaying the message to Robbi. She had ears. Turning Duke around, I headed home. I'd be fine if I didn't have to speak to her the rest of the night.

Around me, the trees cast long shadows, the sun falling behind the mountain towering over our home. Across the valley, shadowy imprints of buildings and fences stretched out everywhere. Watching the last glimpse of light, nature's signal to the end of a day, made me cry. I desired only one thing, a chance at the barrels. Now with the bulls occupying the arena my opportunity, my birthday wish, was lost.

Slowing Duke, I rolled off. A walk would give me time to recover, with a face my family needed 1717 to see. I wouldn't be selfish now, not when the enemy was out there so close to our home.

Duke nudged my back. Hi, baby. You did great today. I'm just feeling sorry for myself. I tried hugging him, but he snorted. Okay, okay, give me a minute. I know you're starving. I wiped my face, and forced a smile. Robbi was coming.

Walking are we. Aw, your weight got to be too much, even for the mighty Duke. She laughed, riding on ahead.

I know, Duke, I said swinging into the saddle. She may be a butt, but she's family. Besides, I don't think anybody else would take her if we asked. I hissed, blowing past Robbi on our sprint for home.

Guiding him into the barn, I led to the last stall, away from the other horses.

Hungry, he shifted and snorted while I removed his gear. Duke, please hold still. I said after a second failed attempt to loosen his cinch. The more you fight me the longer it takes to get you dinner.

From Cricket's stall near the entrance, Robbi yelled. Is the resident crazy horse giving you trouble?

"We're fine, I said using the phrase she'd given me all day, then remembered the fantastic ride my horse had given Robbi earlier this morning. I whispered in Duke's ear. Though I think I'd be even better if she came back here and you kicked her butt again."

Duke whinnied.

Chapter 5 A Golden Gift

Long after