4th and Four

By Jim Phillips

Do you struggle with the expectations placed on you as a man? What is the measure of a true man and how can you successfully meet that benchmark?

"4th and Four" was written specifically to help men understand the power source that is available to them if they will seek out and then plug into these dynamic resources. Being surrounded by men of wisdom, integrity, character, and grit is vital for men in today's world, where we are witnessing the deterioration of the family. Too many men are opting out of this game called life, leaving behind their families because "the game" has become too difficult to play.

With lighthearted humor, "4th and Four" will take you through one man's journey, from growing up in a dysfunctional family, to meeting the love of his life, and then battling and overcoming cancer two times. All of this, while accomplishing more than he had ever dreamed possible. This book will inspire you to tap into your full potential and become the man God intended for you to beâ a man after His own heart.

• Language: English
• Publisher: eBookIt.com
• Release date: Apr 26, 2016
• ISBN: 9781939748942

Book preview

Publishing.

Foreword

No, this is not a book about football, but it is a book about seeking out and finding a few special guys in your life that will huddle up with you when it’s 4th and Four in the game of life!

You see, I am what you would call a Baby Boomer, and I have lived a very interesting life.   During my lifetime, I have had several experiences that have molded and shaped who I am and how I have lived my life.   I’ve known the joy of truly being in love.   I have experienced the sting of death in losing a loved one.   I’ve lived in fear as cancer took away a vital part of my life as a young man, and I’ve wiped away tears of joy as I walked three daughters down the aisle of marriage.   These experiences have given me the wisdom and inspiration to write this book.

I have realized the importance of developing special relationships with friends you can always count on.   These are the friendships that withstand the test of time, especially, when the going gets tough.   These are the guys you want in the huddle with you when it’s 4th and Four and the game is on the line.   I’ve been fortunate to have these kinds of relationships throughout my lifetime.   In fact, I’ve had four that have stood the test of time.   My relationship with each of these four guys, along with some of my life’s experiences, is what inspired me to write this book.

When I began thinking about writing this book, I asked myself, Who was my first real 4th and Four buddy?   Well, I didn’t have to think very long before Eddie Wilson popped into my head, my good old pal, Eddie.   I remember those early summer mornings growing up on Lombardy Drive in South Bend, Indiana.   I guess I must have been about 10 at the time.   Each morning, I would wake up around 7:30 and rise from my bed to look out my window. There he’d be, sitting on his bike with his kickstand down, just waiting for me to come out and play.   He was always there when I needed a real pal.   We could talk about baseball, football and yes, even girls. I could share anything with my pal Eddie and he would listen and always offer support.   Like I said, Eddie was my first real 4th and Four pal.   Even though I didn’t see him again after we moved away, I always wondered what happened to good old Eddie Wilson.

4th and Four! A tough position to be in if your team is behind and time is running out. That’s the time to call the play that decides the outcome of the entire game or, in the case of this book, change the outcome of your entire life!   

Before you dive into reading, I challenge you to ask yourself this question:   If it was 4th and Four in the game of life and you were trapped in a foxhole with life’s bullets flying by and the enemy was fast approaching, do you have guys in your life that would jump into that foxhole and help you deal with the challenges of this game called life?     

Don’t answer immediately.   I want you to really think about the question.   Do you have a special relationship with one or more fellas that would have your back, regardless of the situation?   Would they be there, not only to help you, but also to give you wise counsel and point you in the right direction if you needed it?   

In the first few chapters of this book, I hope you will discover the importance of having special guys such as these in your life.   If they are already there, then you are truly blessed.   But if they’re not, I challenge you to take the first step towards finding and adding these guys to your inner circle of friends.   Friendships with men of integrity, character, wisdom and grit can change the way you approach and live the rest of your life.

So, it’s 4th down and 4 yards to go.   The clock is running and there are no timeouts left in this game we call life.   You are down to your last play and you need all the help you can get from your team or, in this case, your inner circle of buddies, in order to win.   It has come down to this last attempt to save your marriage, your family, your business or your home.   Maybe you’re head-over-heels in debt.   Maybe, your marriage is on the rocks because of infidelity, alcohol or substance abuse (you fill in the reason), and you’re just not sure what has happened to your life or how you ever got to this moment in the first place.   You think to yourself, Oh, if I could only re-wind the play clock and change some of the choices I have made in my life!

My friend, that is one of the reasons I wrote this book, to give you a playbook for a happier, more fulfilling life.   Hopefully, some of the things I share will move you to add these important guys to your life.   Remember, these should be special guys that will encourage you, motivate you, inspire you and, yes, maybe at times even protect you from yourself when it’s crunch time, when its 4th and Four and you need to make exactly the right call!   A great friend is someone who will not merely tell you what you want to hear, but what you need to hear.   Then and only then is he a special 4th and Four friend!   

Later on in this book, you will have the opportunity to meet my 4th and Four special friends that have helped me in both my private and business lives over the last 25 years. These are the guys that inspired me to write this book in which I will cover the four Fs that can shape who you are and how you will live the rest of your life:   Family, Faith, Forgiveness and Finances.

July 2014

Jim Phillips

FAMILY

Chapter 1

1957

It was 1957.   We lived in a small farmhouse in Bridgman, Michigan.   At the time, it was just my mom and dad, my little sister and me.   My dad worked hard for the local foundry and my mom was a housewife.   We lived directly across the street from a small golf course that was surrounded by tall trees.   I remember one of the coolest things for me as a kid was to walk the perimeter of the course and look for stray golf balls.   A once-hit Titleist without a blemish would bring about 25 cents from Mr. Germaine who owned the golf course.   I can remember on a good day taking in about a dozen balls.   That haul brought in around