Toby... Captivated

By Heather Mar-Gerrison

Okay – so my family isn’t perfect – but then, whose is? And besides, it’s a loving and wonderful family and I love every one of my brothers – I have three of them; my sister and my brothers in law – and yes. I did say brothers in law – Tomas and Will are married now too.
I’m aware that we might appear dysfunctional. I’m aware that my relationship with my twin brother seems weird to some – but it’s what we are and they’ll just have to deal with it.
Oh, and to top off all of the madness – I’m in love with an actress – and of course she’s never going to want me – but there it is – ever since I saw the movie ‘Captivated’ – I have been...

• Language: English
• Publisher: Heather Mar-Gerrison
• Release date: Mar 31, 2016
• ISBN: 9781310521492

Heather Mar-Gerrison

I love to write M/M romance and as a sucker for a HEA, you're guaranteed one in my books. #happyheatherafters

Book preview

Prologue

Okay. So, my family isn’t perfect but then, whose is? And besides, it’s a loving and wonderful family and I love every one of my brothers. I have three of them; my sister and my brothers-in-law – and yes. I did say brothers-in-law. Tomas and Will are married now, too.

I’m aware that we might appear dysfunctional. I’m aware that my relationship with my twin brother seems weird to some but it’s what we are and they’ll just have to deal with it.

Oh, and to top off all of the madness, I’m in love with an actress – and of course she’s never going to want me but there it is. Ever since I saw the movie ‘Captivated’, I have been…

Chapter 1 – Captivated

Dude? Really? Trey gave me a pained look and shook his head.

I nodded firmly, You don’t have to come, I said, I’m quite happy to go alone – you can always muck out the horses with Tom, instead. I’m sure he’d be glad of your help. Of course, I was lying. I hated going alone. It must have had something to do with being identical twins. I was always happier when he was around. It made me more complete, somehow. It was also something I was vaguely aware wasn’t exactly practical the older we got.

He looked relieved, That sounds much better. You know I hate sci-fi movies.

I sighed and nodded miserably. Since Tomas had hooked up with Will and subsequently married him, I had no one to go to watch all my geeky sci-fi stuff with – and no, it really wasn’t all that cool tagging along with my gay brother and his husband to such events. It gave off a vibe that I was very available to a lot of very sexy single guys – but since I was straight, their sexiness by-passed me…

There was only one woman for me and had been since I’d first laid eyes on her all those years ago in ‘Captivated: The Princess and The Frog on Mars.’ It was a kids’ TV productions and she was (of course) the princess. I’ll grant you, I was only thirteen at the time and therefore I suppose I have to acknowledge that it was nothing more than a crush but now I knew it. I was in love with Robyn Reece. She was absolutely perfect. She was around about the same age as me – and into the same things (I knew this because I followed her on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. Obsessed? You bet your sweet arse I was…) and I was not-so-secretly in love with her.

The fact that she was now a famous actress and so far out of my league, really should have made me take a reality check. But I’m Toby Fletcher – and reality checks just didn’t register with me. I blamed it on my upbringing…

True walked in at that moment. She frowned at my brother as she heard him trying to wheedle out of his twin-brotherly duty, You’re not going with him? She asked sharply. "When has he ever let you down?"

Trey had the good grace to look ashamed of himself, Fine. He said, throwing up his hand, and trying to scowl at me as menacingly as Tom does. He really couldn’t pull it off, "I’ll take him to the goddamn cinema. Just so long you all realise that whatever delusions he’s got going on inside his head. It isn’t going to make Robyn Reece fall in love with him!"

*

I let out a huge sigh of absolute pleasure as the credits rolled, That was the best movie I’ve seen yet. I said, grinning down at Trey who had fallen asleep leaning on my arm. He looked up at me, one eye open and a scowl on his otherwise lovely face.

Is it finished? he asked grumpily, sitting up and cracking his neck.

I nodded, And she was fucking brilliant. Just like she always is.

You say that about all of them. He said with a big yawn and then cracked his neck left and right again for good measure. But still – great. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Now, let’s get back. If we’re lucky they might still be serving food ‘cause I’m fucking starving.

I nodded, realising that I was pretty damned hungry myself. It had been hours since dinnertime. Still in a happy daze, having spent the last hour and fifty-five minutes absolutely glued to the cinema screen, I followed my brother out to the car, my mind absolutely full of Robyn… She had such presence. She was so beautiful. I was in so much trouble of never finding a normal person to love…

I’d had a couple of girlfriends. Well, kind of… Trey had set me up with a couple of girls that were friends of his girlfriends anyway. I kind of always got the impression that I was a sort of Trey substitute for them, though – kind of like second best to the real thing. Trey was hot – and yes, I realise that I sort-of looked the same as him but I’ve always lacked that certain something he has that makes women instantly fall in love with him. I’m not sexy. No really – I’m not. I just can’t seem to pull it off like he can… He’s most definitely a chick magnet. I just fall into the best bud category and that’s just fine with me – because I am seriously in love with Robyn…

We swung into the lane that led directly to the restaurant. Well, it was quicker than going all the way around to home and trekking over the field…

Trey pulled up in his usual flamboyant way. Some would call him a show-off but I just thought he was great – and we jumped out and shot across to the staff entrance.

Sam looked up as we burst in. He grinned, Hi boys, he sing-songed, How was it?

I grinned back at him, Brilliant. I sighed as I sank down onto the leather sofa in the staff room. Absolutely brilliant.

He rolled his eyes and looked at Trey, Okay. He said, how was it really? he asked.

Trey shrugged, I couldn’t tell you, mate. He said, I fell asleep.

Luca, who had just walked in from the kitchens laughed, That good, huh? he asked as he went over and wrapped his arms around Sam and gave him a hug.

I sniffed indignantly, Look. She’s my favourite actress. I love her movies – and it got great reviews, too. It had a really good cast. That guy you love’s in it. I nodded towards Sam. At his questioning frown I added, The one you’ve got a calendar of, hanging on the back of your wardrobe door in your bedroom.

He blushed. "I don’t love him, he said, getting all flustered, sure, he’s fit, I’m not denying it, but I’m nothing like you over Robyn Reece."

Well, that was true enough. But then, she was particularly wonderful. She actually communicated with her fans – properly… Or she did with me, anyway. We were friends on Facebook – as in, she actually messaged me on there. It’s not just me who loves her, I mumbled, Loads of people do.

Luca looked at me with a slightly perplexed expression, "Sam’s got a bit of a thing for that Josh guy who played Billy Wiggins, sure – but he’s not in love with him. That’s where I come in. He loves me – because I’m real."

I frowned at him, So is Robyn. I said, What’s your point?

He looked back at Sam in exasperation, Seriously? he asked, I had no idea he was this delusional.

Sam burst out laughing, You have no chance of ever talking him out of this, Luca-baby, he said believe me, we’ve tried. You just have to learn to go with it.

Trey nodded his agreement as he headed through the door into the kitchens. Luca looked upset for me, But he’s wasting his life on a pipedream, man. He whined.

Sam shook his head, No he isn’t, he said softly, He’s just not met the one yet, like we have. He stroked Luca’s cheek, a tender expression on his face, and I suddenly had a feeling of longing for Robyn, so badly, it made me want to cry.

Trey came back in from the kitchens, I’ve got chicken and chips on for us, mate. He said, patting me on the shoulder as he flopped down next to me on the sofa and stuck his hands behind his head.

I nodded, Thanks, man.

Trey looked up at the boys, So, what have you lot been on about while I was in there? he asked, waiting patiently for Luca and Sam who were busy kissing each other, to stop. Sam broke away with a bit of a glazed look. He shrugged, You didn’t miss anything. Luca was just saying that Toby was wasting his time on Robyn Reece – and I said not to worry and that he’ll meet the right girl, eventually.

Trey ruffled my hair, Aw, leave him alone. It’s almost Christmas. Maybe his Christmas miracle will happen.

Sam grinned, Yeah, he agreed, Mine did. Finally. I’ve got my Christmas miracle right here.

I wanted to be sick. Nearly every one of them had either met or done something romantic over the Christmas period. Tom and Will had gotten married on Boxing day, Sam and Luca had finally realised their feelings for each other over a snowball fight in the courtyard with us… but Trey and I had our birthdays on Christmas day. There was no way something else good could happen for me at this time of year. Karma simply didn’t allow such things to happen.

Luca kissed Sam on the end of his nose, just proving again that they were the most loved-up couple in the fucking universe.

I quickly looked down at my watch, wishing everyone would change the subject away from me – and my stupid feelings for the actress. Wow, it was only just after midnight. The place was usually a hive of activity until the wee hours. I frowned, "Where is everyone tonight?" I asked.

Luca shrugged, Josh and Leo had to get back early – and as far as I’m aware, Emilio took Josie home. Their daughter was poorly and the babysitter called. They shot off about an hour ago, she was all in a panic but Emilio called a few minutes ago and said that Daisy wasn’t as bad as the babysitter was making out, which was a massive relief. He should be back in a few. He looked out of the window where the snow was steadily falling, Or not. He said with a frown. I’ll call him and tell him to stay where he is. That hill up from Lockton is pretty hairy on a good day and it looks like we’re in for a bit of a storm.

Chapter 2 – Where the hell are we, guys?

Robyn

Um, I’m sure she said she lived somewhere along this stretch. I peered out of the windows and my heart sank as all I could see were miles and miles of soft, white, downy snow. Like a great big blanket had been spread across the whole world. Well, that’s what is seemed like anyway. We’d been on the road for hours and the weather, already bad when we started out, was getting worse and worse. It was difficult to see just a few feet in front of us and I wasn’t the only one getting a little antsy about the whole thing.

Down in London we rarely got snow, so to be on location somewhere so remote and to get snow as thick as this was really quite a treat – however, since we were in no way equipped to deal with it, due to the fact that we never got it, this ‘short’ trip was a little more challenging than I’d envisaged.

Marc and Kelly were my navigators. Kelly was my make-up artist and Marc was my manager. They also happened to be married to each other and Kelly was currently very pregnant with their first child.

There’s a light up that lane. We must be here – and if we’re not, this place will have to damned well do. Marc grumbled, I feel like we’ve been going around in circles for hours and Kelly needs a rest.

Kelly glared at him, I’ve been sat down all bloody afternoon, she said, I’m pregnant, I’m not fucking ill!

I stifled a giggle. Kelly had been complaining constantly about Marc becoming an overbearing father-to-be for weeks now. Bless him. He just loved her to bits and didn’t want her to be uncomfortable.

We drew up and I realised to my dismay that we weren’t actually at my sister’s place at all – but we were at a rather posh-looking restaurant and bar called The Riverside. My heart started thumping. My friend Toby Fletcher (who I was secretly in love with, even though we’d never actually met in person) had a family run business called The Riverside… But no, that would be too fantastic…

Oh, wow. Look! Marc said gleefully, holding out his mobile phone where he’d just been googling the establishment, They have a Michelin star!

I rolled my eyes and tuned out his ramblings of them being totally self-sufficient and having pony-trekking in the summer months. Since I’d made him a proper shed-load of money in the last couple of years, Marc had definitely been enjoying his new-found richness and was ever-so-slightly affected by his new status as a millionaire.

My heart-rate had gone back to normal though, since he’d pointed out the Michelin star – because Toby had never mentioned