Bound by Silk

By Eleanor David

As Stephany spirals back into the depths of darkness she struggles to come to terms with the ugly truth about Jake. Will she ever be able to forgive him? Or indeed will she allow him the chance to explain himself? Once again Stephany brushes herself down and prepares to start over, but when Vivienne turns up full of concern for Jake she fears she may have lost him forever. Having finally learned the truth about his past Stephany is on a race against time to find him. But what will she find and will Jake be prepared to take her back?
Determined never to let anyone or anything come between them again the lovers continue on into unknown territory. But when further strange happenings sees them fleeing overseas Stephany is yet again greeted by added mystery as more of Jakes’ past is revealed to her. Will she ever really know this man she has fallen so hopelessly in love with and will she be able to unlock the secrets she discovers amongst his mothers’ belongings?
With the opening of her new dance school ever looming Stephany hides the continuing nuisance phone calls from Jake and everyone associated with him. Determined not to let them get the better of her, she concentrates on trying to unravel the new mystery around Jakes’ mother by enlisting the help of Jacob the handsome blacksmith. But has she left it too late? Just as she is about to solve the riddles in Jakes’ mothers’ letters an old demon from her own past comes back to haunt her, threatening to end her happiness for ever.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Eleanor David
• Release date: May 31, 2015
• ISBN: 9781310681530

Eleanor David

When her husband suggested that she write her own book instead of spending all her spare time reading other peoples books, she brushed the notion to one side and filed it under ‘ridiculous idea’. However, with the seed firmly planted in her mind she pondered for days over whether she could actually write a book of her own. In the following weeks, with a hectic home life (two sons, a husband, two dogs and a cat!), a busy and demanding full time job in a high street bank, her own horse and smallholding with more dogs, another cat and a few chickens thrown in for good luck, an idea began to form in her mind. A few months later, after spending countless hours whilst travelling to and from her full time job, between cooking meals for the family and running a busy household and during her down time at her smallholding tending to her horses, she came up with an idea for a story. With nothing to lose and the support of her husband she began to write, something that she had never done before. Six months later, Christmas 2013 her first book was finished. The first part of the Silk Trilogy had been written. Unsure of where this new found talent and passion for writing had come from she decided to create a pseudonym in memory of her grandmother, who played a huge part in her upbringing and to recognise the inspiration and support of her husband, her childhood sweetheart of thirty years. Eleanor David was created and in January this year the Silk Trilogy was completed. Part 1 published this week through KDP with Parts 2 and 3 to follow very shortly.

Book preview

BOUND BY SILK

An Erotic Romantic Suspense Novel

Part Three of The Silk Trilogy

This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite eBook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Copyright 2013 Eleanor David

Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty One

Chapter Twenty Two

Chapter Twenty Three

Chapter Twenty Four

Chapter Twenty Five

Chapter Twenty Six

Chapter Twenty Seven

Chapter Twenty Eight

Chapter Twenty Nine

Chapter Thirty

About Eleanor David

Chapter One

Sunlight burned through my closed eyelids as they struggled to open. Dam my head hurts! Where the hell was I? Then as I prized my eyes open slowly I regained my focus reaching out to the emptiness beside me. I was at home in my bed, the curtains wide open allowing the morning sun to drench the room with its warmth through the glass. Shit! What time is it? Moving precariously across the bed I pulled my body up swinging my legs over the side, the throbbing pain in my head excruciating. Holding my head in my hands, eyes closed once more I struggled to try to remember what had happened to me. Jesus I felt like I’d been hit by a ten ton truck. Confusion took hold as I opened my eyes once again, looking all around me as if searching for reassurance that I was in fact safe in the confines of my apartment. I was still fully clothed just my shoes and bag left abandoned at the side of the bed.

That was when it hit me. Yesterday. The supposed meeting with Amanda Cook and the emotional car crash that had unfolded right before my eyes. My stomach churned, oh my god I was going to be sick. Quickly I dashed to the bathroom making the toilet just in time to empty my stomach, pain searing through my head as I held it over the bowl. When there was nothing left to bring up and my stomach ached from wrenching I sat back on the cool tiled floor and began to sob, my shoulders shaking uncontrollably.

I have no idea how long I spent curled up on the bathroom floor, my persistent flow of tears sending me back into the darkness of sleep but when I awoke the pain in my head had subsided somewhat allowing the painful memories of yesterday to trickle through more clearly. Once more the urge to numb the pain of my broken heart and the need to forget consumed me. I needed more whiskey. Heading back into the bedroom I stripped myself of my now shabby clothes and slipped into a baggy tee shirt and a pair of light cotton joggers. My phone had died so plugging it into the charger in the kitchen I first quenched my raging thirst with a bottle of water from the fridge. Pinned to the door was a note from Lizzy, clearly meant for me to see last night.

Hey girlfriend! Staying at Gav’s tonight then going straight to work…be back tea time tomorrow.

Love ya xxxx

Sighing with relief at her timely absence I sauntered back to my room in search of my hand bag, the need for nicotine ever growing. Winner! Inside my bag I not only found an almost full packet of cigarettes but an unopened bottle of whiskey. When had I bought these? And where the hell from? Sitting back down on my bed I twisted the cap off the bottle and bringing the neck to my lips I took a swig, the burn and sharpness of the rich amber liquid making me wince as I swallowed it down.

The sound of bleeping coming from the kitchen where my phone had now come back to life threw me into a sudden panic. Shit! I still didn’t know what time it was and to be honest I really didn’t care, but I did know I should have been in work this morning and that meant only one thing, Mike would be wondering where the hell I was and would most certainly want an update on how the meeting with Amanda Cook had gone. Now I was filled with dread at the thought of what I was going to say to him, I mean how the hell could I tell him that she was a phoney? That all along she had been pursuing me, luring me in so she could destroy me and all that was good in my life. How could I ever face him again? Dam I felt like such a fool. Even he had warned me about Jake, in fact pretty much everyone I knew had warned me about him, so why had I not heeded any of those warnings? God I was such a stupid bitch, I mean as if I would end up with a guy like him.

Delving down into the depths of my sanity I carried my weary body back to the kitchen to find out what delightful messages awaited me, whiskey in one hand and cigs in the other. Grabbing a glass from the cupboard I poured myself a large glass of memory loss and lit a cigarette then with a shaky hand I lifted my phone and began to go through the messages. The time staring back at me displayed on the screen 11:45 a.m. Shit! Shit! Shit! My god, no wonder the bloody thing had died, message after message from Jake stared back at me. I dropped the phone from my hand as if burned by it as more tears sprang from the corners of my eyes trailing effortlessly down my face. Lifting my hand to my mouth once more I was consumed by sadness, anger, betrayal, heartbreak to name just a few of the emotions that currently wrangled around my insides. Downing the contents of the glass of whiskey I’d just poured myself in an attempt to steady my nerves and supress the building rage within me I continued to scroll down until my eyes fell upon a different name. Mike. Three, four, no five messages, the last just about half an hour ago. Taking a deep breath I opened the last of his messages.

Steph its Mike. Please call me as soon as you get this. I’m getting worried now!

What the hell was I supposed to say to him? Unable to make my brain engage I first refilled my glass then typed in a message back to him unable to bring myself to speak. It was as if the cat really did have my tongue because no matter how hard I tried nothing came out. Subconsciously I tapped out my response.

So sorry! Been up all night throwing up. My phone was off and only just managed to get myself out of bed. I’ll call you tomorrow x

Hopefully that would satisfy him. Then switching my phone off I took myself and my bottle of memory block along with my cigs and an ashtray back to my bedroom, where after closing the door and placing my necessary supplies on the bedside table I collapsed in a blubbering mess face down onto the mattress. His smell lingered on the bed linen beside me, the musty residue of his aftershave. My heart wrenched at the memories his scent induced, sending a million mixed messages ricocheting through my body. My whole being wanted to reach out to him, wrap myself in his sweet odour that remained all around me, yet at the same time wanted to rip the linen from the bed and burn it, the only sure way to extinguish his presence from my bed for ever. Crying uncontrollably I tried desperately to gather my thoughts but to no avail. The bracelet on my wrist felt like it was burning into my flesh. God he was everywhere. Frantically I tugged at it eager to break the connection between skin and metal. Once it was free I threw it across the room as a pained shriek escaped from deep within me. I needed more whiskey. Whiskey was the only way I knew how to numb the pain, to forget the hurt I was feeling. The only way to dissolve the lies he’d told me to get me passed this whole charade that had become my life. I emptied my glass and instead of refilling simply drank the poisonous liquid straight from the bottle savouring the sensation as my wretched body was slowly but surely anesthetized until my consciousness ebbed away.

I have no idea how long I lay comatose on my bed but as I opened my eyes the whole apartment was shrouded in silence. Nothing but the sound of my beating heart filled my ears. Blinking my eyes as if to check I was really awake, realisation hit me. Yeah I was drunk, steaming drunk and yet still the pain of my discovery yesterday speared through my broken heart. Jesus if it wasn’t so ridiculous it might just be funny. I mean how could I have spent the last three months with a rapist? A man who’d changed his name and made a fortune from what, an inheritance from wealthy grandparents? Yeah right! I didn’t know what to believe any more. Was any of what he had told me true? The story about the death of his mother, his pain and suffering, a life so similar to that of my own. Was it all just a cruel and intricate web of lies to lure me in and take me? To use my own hurt and suffering to gain my trust while all the time all he was interested in was getting his just deserves.

No! I yelled,

No! It’s not true. It can’t be?

Pulling myself up from the bed I reached for my cigs and lit one up taking long deep drags, my lungs cherishing the invasion. And there I sat in silence for god knows how long refilling my lungs with dangerous toxins, swigging mouthfuls of numbing liquid from the bottle beside me. Then after my brain could no longer compute the barrage of questions that bounced around inside of it hysteria claimed me. I hadn’t heard the door open or the sound of Lizzy’s voice as she’d called out my name, just barely aware of someone grabbing the bottle from my hand.

What the fuck are you doing?!

I heard her now, but the words meant nothing as I continued to roll around in laughter.

Steph! For god’s sake! What the hell’s going on?

Again I was unable to answer as my laughter turned to tears. More tears of heartbreak and despair.

Oh my god Steph, please! Talk to me. What’s happened? Why aren’t you at work?

Now she was shaking me, pulling me from the bed and with an arm wrapped around my middle she dragged me out of the room and down the hall to the kitchen.

Where’s Jake Steph?

Now she had my attention, well sort of. The sound of his name pulling me momentarily from my darkness.

Hmm, Jake. Now there’s a question. I slurred.

I have no fucking idea! Ah but did you know? then pressing a finger to my lips I whispered in my drunken state,

Shhhh, he’s a rapist, but don’t tell anyone yeah and for the record his names not Jake!

Then having placed me on the chair laughter claimed me once more.

Isn’t it funny? All this time and I never even knew.

Steph, what the hell are you talking about? You’re not making any sense.

Sense? I barked through the slur of my voice,

None of it makes any sense except, oops I did it again. Haha there’s a song there…

Then I fell into full song, singing the words out loud to the Britney Spears hit Oops! I did it again.

Steph stop it! Shit your scaring me. That’s it I’m calling Jake.

Holding the worktop to steady me I snapped my head around to where she stood.

No! I don’t want him anywhere near me! Not now not ever. Lizzy don’t you dare call him.

Then I was begging her, pleading with her not to call him before tears pricked again at the corners of my eyes and began their now familiar decent southwards across my flushed cheeks. I reached for the bottle that stood in front of me but she whisked it out of reach before I could grab it.

Oh no you don’t lady. You are going to sober up and then tell me what the fuck all this is about.

Placing a mug of steaming dark liquid before me she ordered me to drink. I’d barely got the mug to my mouth when the bitter smell of the coffee hit my nostrils. The strong pungent aroma making my stomach churn sending me hurtling over to the sink where I once again emptied the contents of my stomach. Lizzy held back my hair and gently rubbed my back as I wrenched again and again until there was nothing more to bring up. Collecting my mug of black coffee and a bottle of water from the fridge she guided me into the living room then sat down beside me as I leant back against the softness of the couch.

Right, drink some water then sip on the coffee. Then my friend you are going to tell me what the hell is going on.

I flashed her look that told her I had no idea where to start as the humiliation began to set in. Neither of us spoke, momentarily consumed by emotion as she took me in her arms and held me, rocking me back and forth like a mother would her child. Shielding them from all the bad in the world, chasing away their demons. Eventually after we’d both shed more tears she pulled back and still holding me, her hands wrapped gently around the slight swell of my biceps she began to speak, her voice soft and encouraging.

Steph, I need you to tell me what happened here. I need to know what’s sent you back into this whirlwind of destruction. Sweetie I can’t help you unless you talk to me.

I stared deep into her bright eyes, glistening in their salty wetness as she stared back at me filled with emotion. And so I began….

God Lizzy, I don’t know where to start.

Curling my legs underneath me I looked up to the ceiling desperately trying to fight off the onslaught of yet more tears.

Yesterday I was to go and meet Amanda Cook at a premises out of town to discuss the proposals with her for the contract Phil and I recently set up for the advertising and promotion of her new chain of beauticians. I paused taking in deep breath before exhaling loudly.

The single word Yesterday sending the lyrics of the classic Beatles song swimming around my head and I couldn’t help but wonder if Jake was feeling the same way I was. Humph, I doubted that very much.

Go on Steph. What happened? Lizzy urged.

Quietly and calmly I relayed the events of yesterday afternoon from the very name of the street to the guy on the bike that had delivered the envelope when I arrived, right up the point where the truth about Jake Sinclair had been so tactfully revealed to me. After a few moments quiet while she gathered her thoughts came the abundance of questions that she’d been stockpiling throughout my tail of woe.

But, how? Why? When did he change his name? I mean if he really is this Jacob Stanton guy then surely there has to be some record of it but why? It doesn’t make any sense Steph. I mean you said you saw the article in the newspaper cutting but surely then he would have gone to prison, which means Gavin must have known about this. It just doesn’t make any sense.

No shit Sherlock! I’m sure as hell I can’t make any sense of it all. But one thing I do know is this, I wish I’d never fucking stumbled across Jake fucking Sinclair.

Steph there just has to be an explanation. Have you talked to him about it?

What?! Are you serious? Of course I haven’t talked to him about it, I never want to see him again never mind talk to him. I barked.

But…

No way Lizzy. There’s no way back from this. I’m just going to have to face the fact that I’m just not destined to be happy.

Then burying my face in my hands added,

Lizzy? Why does bad stuff always happen to me?

Hey, come here. She said as she collected me up in her warm embrace.

I really loved him you know. I whimpered.

Yeah I know, and you know what despite what you’ve told me I know he really loved you too. That’s why this whole thing just doesn’t make any sense.

She continued to hold me as I sobbed into her, too many emotions to mention ripping threw me. Several minutes later after going to retrieve my cigarettes from the bedroom, my previous drunken state now replaced by my morbid soberness I sat and smoked while Lizzy made two cups of tea.

So what did you do after you left? It’s just your car isn’t here which is why I didn’t expect you to be home when I got in. Lizzy asked as she returned carrying two cups of tea and a packet of paracetamol.

Cheers.

I took two of the white tablets and held them in my hand for a moment before taking a drink of tea and swallowing them down. God I wish they would take more than my headache away.

Steph? Where did you go and where’s your car?

I don’t know.

What do you mean you don’t know? You must know where you were.

Sighing and pulling my hand through my hair I looked at her.

I don’t know. When I came out of the building I got in the car and just drove. I had no idea where I was going or how far I’d driven. I remember parking up in a garage somewhere and buying some cigarettes then I just walked, walked until my feet ached. I found myself outside a hotel so I went inside to buy a drink.

Taking another drink of tea I tried desperately to calm my racing heart as the memory of what had been flashed before my eyes. I remembered the kind face of the barman and his cocky grin as I’d asked for the whiskey, the surprise in his eyes at my unusual request. I guess they didn’t get many young women in there purchasing bottles of whiskey then drinking alone. But after that my mind was a complete blank. Yep my memory had upt and left the building.

The problem is Lizzy, the next thing I can remember is waking up in my bed earlier today. The bits in the middle are just gone. Oh shit! I guess I drank too much whiskey.

Well judging by the state of you when I got home I reckon you’re right. You know Steph you should have called me. You promised me last time you did this that you would call me!

Now there was just a tinge of anger to her voice and I knew she was disappointed with me but hello, what did she expect me to do? The last thing I was going to do was ring her.

Lizzy look I’m sorry okay. I was a mess. I mean I’d just had the biggest shock of my life and all I could think about was getting out of there and fast. The last thing I needed was Jake getting a hold of me.

And there it was again, that stabbing pain that speared through my heart. God I missed him so much, I never knew how crippling it would be without him. His smell, his voice, his touch. Oh my god his touch. My body ached for him. Tears began to flow again slowly from my eyes as the memory of his touch consumed me. I was ruined. Never would any other be able to sate me the way he did, hold my very soul in the palm of his hand as Jake had. Jesus I felt like I’d been ripped in two as if a part of me was gone, missing for all eternity.

Steph, that’s ridiculous. You need to find him and talk to him. Where’s your phone?

Before my brain could compute what she was saying she was up from the couch and out of the room, returning seconds later with my phone in her hands.

Lizzy no! Give me the phone! I demanded as I stood to face her.

We both jumped as it sprang to life in the palm of her hand, the oh so familiar sound of Jason Derulo’s trumpets. We both stood motionless, like a pair of statues staring at the small piece of technology as it played over and over, the words forcing more tears from my eyes, my previous heartbreak replaced temporarily by anger. I had my hand held out in front of me silently begging her to give me the phone, my eyes fixed on it as if it were an object from outer space. Lizzy’s thumb hovered over the screen dangerously close, I felt my eyes widen as she swiped her thumb across it and brought it to her ear.

Lizzy No! I yelled as her shaky voice answered the call.

Unable to stand it any longer I stormed out of the room brushing roughly passed her as I made a beeline for the kitchen. Once there my eyes immediately fell on the half empty bottle of whiskey and without a second thought I unscrewed the cap, lifted it to my lips and drank savouring the burn as I guzzled it down. Lost in my need to numb the pain once more I heard nothing of her conversation, just repeatedly brought the bottle to my lips and drank, wincing with every mouthful at the sharp bite of the liquid as I swallowed it down.

I searched the worktop for my cigs but they were gone. Shit! I took them in the living room and Lizzy was in the living room being taken in my more of his lies supposedly. Well fuck them both I wanted a smoke and neither Lizzy nor Jake was going to stop me from having one. Boldly I walked back into the room, ignoring my friend who was now perched nervously on the edge of the couch.

I’m going to bed. I announced like a petulant child as I swooped the cigs from the table and turned on my heel heading straight back out the door, stopping off briefly in the kitchen to collect the last of the whiskey, not bothering to pick up a glass.

Steph wait! No Jake its fine, look I don’t think coming over here right now is a good idea. Look just do as Ray said and stay where you are. Just give me some time…..

The conversation I’d overheard faded off as I slammed my bedroom shut door behind me. Moments later Lizzy was by my side, the bed dipping with her weight as she sat down beside me.

Steph you really need to talk to him. He’s beside himself with worry. Shit I never heard a man so broken, he’s so afraid that he’s lost you.

Lost me! I screamed as I sat myself up, my head lolling ever so slightly at the sudden movement, my recent intake of whiskey already taking effect.

Well if he’s so fucking worried about me why the fuck isn’t he here? Hmm! Why isn’t her here now begging for my forgiveness?

Steph, listen to me I think it’s more complicated than that. He hasn’t exactly told me what all this is about but reading between the lines I’m guessing this is exactly what Rebecca wanted.

Rebecca? Oh yes of course, I almost forgot her name isn’t Amanda after all is it! Now I was pissed, the alcohol in my system fuelling my anger taking me further and further into the depths of despair.

Steph?

I’m not interested Lizzy! I will not allow myself to be drawn into any more of his lies. He’s had his chance and he’s blown it. End of. So now I’d like you to leave me alone while I continue to drink myself into oblivion and deal with this in the only way I know how.

I was being a total bitch and I knew it, but never the less right now I just needed to be alone. Alone to wallow in my self-pity at least for a while before I rose again like the phoenix from the fire and took on the task of piecing my shattered heart back together again.

Chapter Two.

Dragging myself out of bed I hauled my sorry ass into the shower. I had no idea what time it was and no desire to be interested. All I knew was that I had drank the bottle dry and I was all out of cigarettes. The hot water poured out of the jets burning my flesh, a welcome alternative in the absence of alcohol or any other substance. When I could stand it no longer I ceased the flow standing naked against the tiles, the memory of shower sex stinging like a thousand bees. My insides clenched as I wrapped my arms around myself as my body slid helplessly to the floor. Cold and shivering I grabbed a towel and began to dry myself rubbing at my flesh to increase my blood flow allowing the warmth of my blood to seep through to the follicles of my skin, slowly shrinking the goose bumps that covered my flesh.

Having dressed myself in jeans and a tee shirt I slipped my feet into a pair of trainers and ventured out into the hall way. The sight that greeted me as I entered the kitchen was simply enchanting, or at least it would have been if under different circumstances. Every available space on the worktops was filled with flowers. Beautiful bouquets made from flowers of every variety. A kaleidoscope of colour filtering through my eyes. If I knew Jake each and every one of them would have its own individual message and meaning. Their scent was intoxicating as I stood speechless, dumbfounded at the spectacle before me.

Tears pricked at the back of my eyes as I walked calmly to the sink, retrieving a black bin liner from the cupboard beneath it before taking each floral display and placing it inside without daring to read the words written in the cards. With all the flowers hidden inside their dark coffin I tied the handles sealing their fate. Did he seriously think that he could win me over by sending me almost the entire contents of the local florist? I don’t think so. No. As much as it killed me inside that was not going to happen. I grabbed my car keys, picked up my purse and with the heavy sack of flowers I left the apartment paying no attention to the high tech security system. Thank god my trusty jeep still sat outside in the car park. On my way out to the car I dumped my expensive sack of waste in the large garden waste recycle bin at the back of the building before locating my jeep and climbing inside.

I needed to talk to Mike and I figured it was a conversation best had while Phil was away so pointing my car in the direction of the office I set off on the familiar route to my current place of work. I called in at the off licence on the way and picked up another couple of bottles of whiskey and enough cigarettes to last me a week before resuming my journey to the office. I’d left my phone at home, the need for its services no longer seeming necessary, after all with Jake out of the picture no one gave a dam as to where I was or how long I was going to be. I also had no idea whether Lizzy had been home or not when I’d left, neither bothering to check her room or search for a note which was her usual choice of communication to let me know her plans. Needless to say I was clueless as to what they were.

Pulling into the car park at work seemed surreal, my being here on my day off almost as much as a surprise to Marjory as it was to me. I smiled shyly as I passed suddenly aware of my shabby appearance. My hair had been drawn back into a loose pony tail still damp from my earlier shower and my face was clear of makeup of any description. God I’d never even checked my reflection in the mirror before I left, my eyes surely still red and puffy from all the tears I’d shed over the last forty eight hours. Even after Ben I don’t think I’d cried as much as I had over Jake, hell after the abortion I’d only shed a few, more in mourning for the child that could have been but never had a chance. Jesus this was going to be hard. I climbed the stairs two at a time and was relieved to find the office deserted, just Mike sitting behind his desk, his door wide open, a silent invitation to anyone who cared to enter. Looking up from his paperwork the surprise on his face was as evident as it was in his voice as he spoke.

Steph? What on earth? Are you okay love?

Clearly I should have checked the mirror before I’d left, maybe even taken the time to apply some makeup. Oh well at least this was going to make my feigned excuse of illness yesterday appear more believable.

I’m okay Mike. Well at least I will be with time.

God I tried to put on a brave face but unsuccessfully fought back the tears as I brushed the salty wetness from my lashes.

Like hell you are. Steph sit down and tell me what’s wrong. His fatherly hand guiding me to the chair in front of his desk.

I drew in a breath and mustered up as much courage as I could,

Mike I’m sorry but I’m here to hand in my notice.

What?! But why? the concern as before evident in both his face and voice.

Look, I’m afraid I’ve been somewhat less than honest with you and well I guess in light of recent events I figured now was as good a time as any to come clean.

Well I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about, but go on. I’m all ears.

Dam I had no idea this was going to be so hard or maybe it was just the current circumstances that had me feeling consumed by guilt.

I’m sorry Mike but I’ve been using you and your company to learn about the business. His brow furrowed as confusion took hold of him.

What do you mean, using me? he asked cautiously.

I drew in a calming breath before attempting to explain myself,

When I moved here a few months ago my intention was to set up a dance school but I needed to learn how to advertise and promote it effectively first. That and the money of course, I mean I still needed a job in the meantime so what could be better, get a job in advertising. That way I could earn and learn all at the same time.

The concern that had previously taken a hold of him slowly ebbed away as a soft smile spread across his face.

My dear is that all? I think you should get a gold star for being so dammed resourceful. I thought for a minute you were going to tell me you’d set up in competition or something and stolen all of my clients.

Then laughing he added,

What was the outcome by the way with Miss Cooke?

Argh…and there it was, the dreaded question which would inevitably lead to countless more.

Ah yes, well I’m afraid she wasn’t exactly all she was made out to be.

A deep frown covering his brow again as I persuaded my brain to cooperate with my mouth.

Her name is Rebecca Hunt and it would seem that she is an acquaintance from Jake’s past life. Seemingly she played us all, using the firm to get to him. Anyway for reasons I’d rather not go into Jake and I are no longer together and well my need to work here is no longer necessary so if it’s okay with you I’d be very grateful if you would just let me go and not ask me to work my notice.

Hang on just a minute, you mean to tell me all that work was just some crazy ex’s twisted way to get to Jake through you so she could destroy what the two of you had?

Dam I hadn’t looked at it like that before. But hell even if that were the truth it didn’t get him off the hook for the lies he’d told me, the fact he’d lied about his real name and oh yeah, conveniently omitted to tell me that he was a rapist.

I don’t know Mike. To be honest I don’t know anything anymore but what I do know is this. I can’t work here anymore and all this shit that’s descended on me right now means I have to make some serious decisions about my life.

And I suppose there’s nothing I can do to change your mind is there?

Shaking my head I silently answered his question as I blinked back the tears that blurred my vision.

Well then, I guess there’s nothing more to say except that mans a bloody fool to let you go and I’m going to find it very hard to find a replacement even half as good as you. But if you’re minds made up then I guess that’s that. Thank you for your honesty Steph and if you ever need anything, anything at all you know where I am, you hear me?

Still unable to speak I nodded acknowledging his words as he stood and moved around his desk to where I sat. Holding out his hand I took it in mine and after I too was standing we shook hands.

Oh hell come here…

He drew me into a warm embrace and hugged me tightly then with his hands resting on my shoulders looked down into my eyes.

Good luck Stephanie and just remember everyone deserves a second chance. Whatever it is that’s come between you and Jake is repairable. What you two had was extraordinary, a special kind of love, the kind that’s worth fighting for.

Thanks Mike, but I’m not sure any of this is repairable right now.

Then collecting the few things from my desk I bode him farewell and walked away from Ace Marketing, well for now anyway.

Returning to my car with a heavy heart I decided to swing by the farm before going home, after all I’d not been there for two days and I didn’t want to have to start making up excuses to Pat as to why. I hadn’t told anyone of my decision to hand in my notice an impulsive act that I secretly hoped I was not going to regret. Equally no one knew of my pre-arranged days off so my turning up at the farm in the middle of the day would hopefully find it quiet and absent from gossips. I was in luck. Not a sole was around when I arrived so I snuck off to the field to confide in my four legged friend and to let her know I was not going to be around for a few days. Yeah that’s right I needed some time to clear my head or drown my sorrows and that meant that the last thing I needed was to have to drag myself up the farm every day. Besides I was in no fit state to be in the saddle so after settling myself under my favourite overhang I rattled on about all that was wrong with my life wishing that my trusted therapist had the power of speech, the ability to tell me that everything was going to be okay. But it wasn’t was it? Going to be okay, so with a heavy heart and tear stained cheeks I made my way back to my car deciding to drop a note through Pates door telling her I would be away for a few days. I found a scrap of paper and a pen amongst the things I’d cleared from my desk and wrote,

Hi Pat, wanted to let you know I won’t be around for a while. Please keep an eye on Ember for me. I’ll be in touch soon. Steph xxx

God I hated doing this but it was the only way. I couldn’t bear the thought of listening to Timmy’s taunts when word got round that Jake and I were over. God he was going to love this because as sure as eggs are eggs it wasn’t going to be long before the tongues started wagging and right now I was too hurt and weak to deal with any of it. No, I was definitely doing the right thing by staying away, allowing the dust to settle before anybody was able to stir it up again.

Jet whinnied as I passed by his paddock having slipped the note through Pats door and stopping for a moment I assured him too that I would soon be back to pick up where we left off.

As I drove home grateful that no one had been around I sat patiently before a red light, thoughts of what I was going to do with my life swimming around inside my head when my eyes were drawn to the road to my left. The lights there had just turned to red meaning mine were about to go green. My heart sank as my stomach churned at the sight of the red Ferrari that had just pulled to a halt behind them. It was Jake. It had to be, I mean who else drove around in a red Ferrari? I glanced away quickly focusing on the road ahead as my lights changed to green offering me free passage forward. Without even thinking I floored it, my foot pressing down hard on the accelerator, the automatic gearbox surging me forward. Thank god there was life in the old jeep yet! Then I heard the screeching of tyres as the fancy red sports car came into view in my rear view mirror. Panic ripped through me as it sped up close behind me. Shit! There was no way I could outrun him not in this heavy lump of metal and even if it were an equally sleek machine as his I doubted even then that my driving skills were anywhere near those of Jakes. Residing myself to the fact that he was just going to follow me home I continued along my chosen route with a racing heart as a feeling of dread consumed me. Flicking my eyes up to the rear view mirror then back to the road ahead I successfully managed to increase my anxiety with each glance. I could see the look on his face through the glass of his windscreen he was that close to me. A pained expression as his lips moved as if speaking to someone. I wasn’t sure if he was talking to himself, trying to communicate with me or maybe he had his phone connected to the blue tooth inside the car and was engrossed in conversation. Either way just watching him behind me had my insides melting at the memory of what that mouth could do. How those lips had felt against my flesh, his expert kisses, his ability to cast his spell over me. Shit! How would I resist him when I inevitably ended up face to face with him again?

My heart beat like a base drum inside my chest as I pulled up into the only space outside my apartment, the shriek of Jakes tyres as he screeched to a halt in the middle of the road beside me filling me once more with dread as I sat behind the wheel of my car and killed the engine. Picking up my bag I swung open the door and within a beat of a heart he was in front of me. God he looked amazing, his strong firm body hidden behind the soft cotton of his plain white tee shirt. His thick muscled thighs straining against the fabric of his scruffy old jeans. My eyes travelled slowly up from the ground drinking him in before they settled momentarily on the dark shadow of his chin. He looked like he hadn’t shaved in the last two days, his six o’clock shadow now the beginning of a dark beard. My god he looked sexy with a beard, why hadn’t I insisted that he grow one when we were together, the thought of it rubbing against the insides of my thighs causing my insides to clench and heat to pool between my legs. Dammit Steph stop it! He’s a liar and a rapist for god’s sake, get a grip. But I couldn’t help it, he just did this to me, had my body turning to jelly and he hadn’t even touched me yet. He couldn’t touch me, no way. I couldn’t let that happen because if he did then I knew I would surrender, my body betraying me in the way that I knew it would, already had.

Steph please just let me explain. He pleaded as he reached out to me.

Wincing and jerking myself away from him I dared myself to look him in the eye. Those beautiful pools of blue had lost their sparkle, instead of brimming with love for me now they just looked dull and empty.

There’s nothing to explain Jake. You are a rapist and you changed your name to hide it. Simple.

No that’s not true.

No? I flashed him a look of disbelief

So the newspaper cutting was a fake? And you were never called Jacob Stanton? Rebecca Hunt was a figment of my imagination who just made all this up?

Yes, no, oh fuck! This is such a mess.

Well come on Jake or should I say Jacob? Which is it to be? Yes or No?

Don’t call me that! My name is Jake and no it’s not true. Then with his voice flailing off he scraped his hands through his hair,

Well not all of it anyway. Look Steph just give me a chance here baby. Just let me explain. Shit Steph I love you for fucks sake!

Don’t call me baby, you lost the right to call me that back there on Smithy Lane. How could you? After everything I told you about me. How could you know all that and not tell me Jake?

Just then, just when I could feel myself giving in to him the sound a horn blasting broke me from his spell.

Oi! Mate move your car will ya!? a voice called impatiently from a vehicle behind the Ferrari.

Jake never even glanced in his direction, his eyes fixed on mine as they swelled with unshed tears. Tears that I was fighting so desperately to hold back.

I said move your god dam fancy car will ya! the angry voice called out again clearly pissed off at Jake’s lack of attention.

He held an arm up and raised a finger silently telling the guy who was rudely pressing against his horn again to wait a minute.

Steph please, you have to believe me it’s not true.

Then with his other hand he cupped my cheek in its palm clearly craving the feel of me as much as I craved his touch. Closing my eyes tightly I leant against him as the tears I could hold back no longer began their decent. Rubbing them away with his thumb Jake spoke again, his voice soft and broken,

God even when you’re crying you’re beautiful. What have I done?

The horn from the awaiting car sounded harshly again,

Move you’re fucking car or else I’m going to drive right over it!

I winced as Jake removed his hand from my cheek.

Stay here. Let me park up.

Alright dickhead keep your fucking wig on! Jake barked back at him as he dived behind the wheel of the red sports car and fired up the engine.

What have I done? Jakes words repeating over and over in my head. Move Stephany!