Avi

By Linda Leonard

Book 1 - The Redemption Series. After five marriages and living with another man, Avi struggles to overcome the disappointments and mistakes of the past: the loss of her high school sweetheart and son, abuse, accusations of theft, embarrassment as people gossip, and the infidelity she discovers. She walks through life, a wounded soul, looking for someone she can trust. Avi is a modern day story of the woman at the well.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Linda Leonard
• Release date: Mar 19, 2015
• ISBN: 9780988364158

Linda Leonard

Linda Leonard is a retired high school teacher/librarian. She is the mother of four, grandmother of six, and an educator who has taught in the public school system for 28 years as an English/Speech teacher (including 15 years as a Speech/Debate Coach and 14 years as a yearbook adviser.) She also served 2 1/2 years as a librarian, a total of 30 1/2 years in public education. She holds a B.A. in English and M.Ed. in Speech.

Book preview

Chapter 1

No… No…

Cole touched her arm. Avi, wake up!

Avi jerked and drew away from him, sweating and gasping for air.

Avi, it’s me, Cole. What’s wrong?

It took Avi a few seconds to recognize him in the dim light. Oh, Cole, it was just a bad dream.

It was more like a nightmare. It sounds like the same one you had a couple of days ago. What’s going on?

Nothing. I’ve had nightmares since I was a small child. I’m sorry. It isn’t something I can control.

Well, it disrupts sleep. Do you need to see someone for your nightmares? I mean, isn’t there something someone could do or some medication to help you sleep?

No, Cole, you can’t control dreams or nightmares. They just happen.

Well, your dreams or nightmares really mess up my sleep.

If we want to talk about lack of sleep, why don’t we talk about your snoring? It’s 1:15 now. We went to bed at 10:00, and you started sawing logs and loading them on a freight train. The last time I looked at the clock it was 12:35, and I still wasn’t sleeping because the freight train rumbled through this bedroom non-stop. I don’t complain. If you want to talk about lack of sleep, why don’t we start with your snoring?

Avi, I don’t want to pick a fight. We both seem to lose sleep when you have those episodes.

When I can get to sleep easily, I seem to not have those ‘episodes’ as you call them. Let’s try to get back to sleep and talk about this in the morning.

Cole’s heavy breathing slowly evolved into a soft snore. It wasn’t the freight train but just loud enough to keep Avi from drifting to sleep. Occasionally, she would glance at the clock on the end table.

Finally, Avi could see the soft glow of the rising sun as she looked out the window. She released the curtain, and put her hand under the quilt. To keep the front of her face and nose warm, she pushed the quilt in front of her face. Her breath provided the needed warmth as it bounced back and hit her nose when she exhaled. Cold, the one word she woke up thinking about on mornings like this. She dreaded getting up and cooking breakfast.

When she looked at the clock and saw she had twenty minutes before the alarm sounded, she wiggled toward the foot of the bed and enjoyed the warmth. I don’t understand why he is so thrifty. It was the word he always used when he talked about money. She secretly called it tight. Maybe he was that way with money because he grew up without; but then again, so did she. In many ways she still didn’t have the security she so desperately wanted. He took pride in his bank account balance and the fact he had built his own business. Money was not that important. As long as she had a place to stay, food, and clothes, she was content. All she ever wanted was one person who would love her.

Cole was still softly snoring as she turned to look at him in the night light glow. He was nearly six feet tall, well-built, and attractive. He did not display emotion. She had never received flowers, gone walking in the park while holding his hand, or ever held a conversation on the phone with him because he was always in a hurry or busy. He was practical and blunt. At least he wasn’t abusive. Still, there seemed to be something missing – affection. She wasn’t married to him because her heart had been broken five times. She was not about to allow another failed marriage.

In fact, he hadn’t even talked of marriage. They met in a bar about a year ago. He seemed to be popular with his friends and very polite. She enjoyed talking to him, and he never acted like she owed him anything when he bought her drinks or dinner. After a couple of months, he invited her to his house one Friday saying it would be less expensive if they enjoyed a home-cooked meal instead of going out to eat. He grilled the steaks, and she cooked the baked potato and made the salad.

After several weekend meals, he said, Avi, if you moved in, you could save the apartment rent, and we would both benefit. I have three bedrooms, and we could treat the house as if it were an apartment. You would have your room and I would have mine. Wouldn’t it be a good deal? Why don’t you move in and try it out for a couple of weeks before making a final decision?

The offer was too good to refuse. The house was only a couple of years old. He was a contractor and built his own home – three bedrooms, two baths, utility room, and a kitchen/living room with an open floor plan and a fireplace. There was a large front porch with a swing. It was a nice-looking place. Avi slept in one of the other bedrooms for a couple of weeks until that night when she had just a little too much to drink.

That was how her life with him began – a business deal with too many fringe benefits. They shared the house. He took care of the yard, and she took care of the interior. He always made sure the wood was stacked near the fireplace. Every day she came home from work and cleaned the room for the day.

"God, why can’t I find just one person who cares about me for me? I’ve tried so hard, but I always end up hurt and alone."

She glanced at the clock and noticed she had a couple of minutes before the alarm. Slipping out of bed, she quickly put on her robe, walked to the kitchen, plugged the coffee pot, went to the fireplace, and scooped ashes into a bucket. As she opened the blinds, light from the rising sun could be easily seen through the leafless trees. When she turned on the kitchen light, the glow reached down the hall. The alarm clock broke the silence. Cole walked into the kitchen and poured a cup of coffee.

Good Morning! Avi said cheerfully.

His flat reply was Morning.

He took a sip, yawned, and went to his chair and placed the cup on the end table. To start the fireplace, he had installed a line from the propane tank through the floor near the fireplace. There was no need to open the door for a portable tank. All he had to do was put the pipe with the holes under the grate, turn on the valve, and flip a match under the wood. Fire flew over the logs and warmed the house. He always left the starter pipe on for at least ten minutes to assure that the room was warm and the logs were totally consumed by the flames. Cole grabbed his cup of coffee and watched the flames.

The smell of bacon filled the room as Avi started cooking the grits. Well, Cole, what’s your plan for the day?

He replied, The usual. Hey, what was that last night?

I told you, just a bad dream. I’ve had them since I was a child. If we talk about my dream, which I don’t remember, then we also need to talk about your snoring.

Do I really keep you up at night?

Yes,

I didn’t know that I snored.

Most people are unaware because they are sound asleep. Cole, I’m sorry I have dreams and wake you up. I really am, but it doesn’t take you long to get back to sleep.

How do you know that?

Within ten minutes you were sawing logs again. Can’t you just think of the disruption in your sleep like a trip to the bathroom? You get up at least twice a night for that.

I do, but how do you know?

I’m a light sleeper. I have trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep. Most women I know are like that. You have an empty box in your head; you can go there any time. Our minds are constantly in motion. It takes a great deal to slow them down and to keep them in neutral.

Avi cracked three eggs into an oiled pan and put two paper plates side by side. He received twice as much as she did. It was easy to divide what was cooked – hash browns, bacon, grits, and finally eggs. As she turned to the table, he was walking toward it. Cole went to the refrigerator, grabbed the milk and two paper cups, poured both, and placed them on the table. Nothing needed to be said – that was their routine every morning. She figured he had taken the cue that breakfast was ready when he heard spoons lightly hit the pots as she dished out the food. They ate in silence.

Cole picked up the empty paper products, threw them in the fire, and removed the starter pipe. As he walked toward his bedroom to dress, she made his sandwich, lunchmeat between bread, and grabbed a bag of chips. She turned to the sink to wash the pots. His keys jingled as he picked up his lunch bag. I’ll be late today. We are trying to finish a job and beat a deadline. Could you fix something like soup for dinner? That way you can eat whenever you are hungry, and I’ll just eat when I get back.

Sure, soup sounds really good on a cold day like today; any special kind?

Not really, whatever you want to cook. I’d like a little meat in it.

What about vegetable beef?

Sounds good, don’t forget to close the fireplace doors when you leave.

With that said, he turned and walked out of the door. Looking at the closed door, she felt like a live-in maid instead of someone he cared about. He didn’t hug or kiss her. Why did this always happen to her? She told herself it would just take time before his heart grew fond of her. Time? It had been ten months now, and they had settled in their routine. Loneliness crept into her life again.

As she walked to the fireplace, she looked on the mantle at the picture of the woman and six-year-old girl. She had asked him about the picture the first night he invited her over and they cooked together. He bluntly replied, My wife and daughter. They were killed coming home from her parents one night about five years ago – killed by a drunk driver who hit them head on. He wasn’t even hurt. He was sentenced to seven years before he was eligible for parole because he had no prior record. He got seven years; I got life without them.

Her heart ached because she remembered losing her first husband and child. Although she didn’t lose them to a drunk driver, the pain was just as real. They were gone from her life.

It didn’t take her long to dress because she laid out her clothes the night before in her bedroom – the one she had moved into. Her clothes remained in there because there was more room. She even used the bathroom between the two other bedrooms in the house. There was a door connecting the two bedrooms and a door from the hall. It could be used by house guests or children by locking the opposite door and the hall door. It was quite large and roomy. She hung her gown on the hook near the shower. The tub was on the other side of the room. Both a shower and a tub – he thought of everything.

He had his room; she had hers. She only had one bed to take care of now. After she dressed, she ran across the hall and straightened his bed. I feel like a live-in maid.

Avi looked at the clock and realized she had just enough time to get to the office, grabbed her keys, coat and purse, and locked the door. Living with Cole did have some advantages. It allowed her to save money and drive a new car. But still, something was missing. "God, where are you?"

"I have always been here daughter."

She jumped and looked around because she thought she had heard someone in the car talking to her. When she saw no one sitting in the rear seat, she looked behind the front seat. Shaking her head, she put the car into reverse and backed to the turn-around. I thought someone talked to me. Am I going crazy? There was only five minutes to spare if she was going to make it to work in time.

Chapter 2

Cole’s house was about five hundred feet from the highway hidden at the end of a one lane gravel road. It cut through the trees slowly right as you left the highway then sharply left until it reached the house. He installed a remote lock on the gate; all she had to do was press a button, and it would swing open. He loved the outdoors growing up. When he left work, he wanted to step out of the everyday aggravation with customers and traffic.

The bare branches of the trees lining the driveway whipped in the wind as Avi left for work. There was a storm approaching, and she hoped it would not be a bad one. Tuning the radio to the weather station, she heard a winter storm warning was in effect for the county. It reminded her of the day she left her home for work nearly six years ago.

Her mind drifted back to high school. She accepted a date with Jerry Singleton when she was a junior and fell in love with him. He was the quarterback of the football team, and they dated all of that year. There had been rumors of his playing around, but she never found any evidence. She figured jealous girls started rumors to cause trouble.

After getting a full-paid scholarship to one of the most prestigious universities in the state, he proposed to her. Because he wanted her to go with him, she dropped out of high school at the end of her junior year. Jerry promised she would be able to finish school, and she was in love. They didn’t have a church wedding but were married by a justice of the peace. His parents were not happy; and when her father found out, he disinherited her.

Their university apartment occupied her time while he went to class and practiced football. Dinner was ready every night when he came home. They didn’t spend much time together because all of his time was taken with school and football. At night he would study. She could still hear his voice, I promise it will be better when I’m finished with school.

After a couple of months walking around the area, she found a small convenience store with a help wanted sign and applied. After all, she could easily work from eight to five and still have time to fix dinner before Jerry walked through the door at seven. He left for school at seven in the morning and didn’t return until seven or eight at night. When she told him she had a job, he was furious.

Avi, I don’t understand. Why do you have to work? We have more than enough with the scholarship money to meet our needs.

Jerry, we can save the money and use it as a down payment on our home. There is nothing to do here all day after I do dishes and clean house. I want to contribute more to our marriage. Soap operas all day long are boring. Why can’t I work?

I need to be the one that provides for my family. That is a man’s duty.

You do provide. We have more than enough money. I need to do something productive. I don’t want to sit around all day and watch television. You seem upset and I don’t understand.

Avi, I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want you to meet someone and lose interest in me.

Avi smiled, Jerry, you have nothing to worry about because you are my one and only love. There will never be anyone else.

I know you believe that, but people are human. I have always been faithful to you. I made sure I wasn’t around anyone who could divide my mind. I don’t want anything to come between us.

You don’t have to worry.

Yes, I do because I know it can happen.

What are you talking about?

Before I met you, I dated around. Every time I met someone new, I wondered what it would be like to be with that person. When I met you, I decided you were the one I wanted to spend my life with, so I made sure no one would come between us. I’m afraid I’ll lose you, Avi.

High school is in the past. Let’s leave it there. I forgive you for what you did before you met me. I want our marriage to be one of mutual trust. Trust me and know I will always be yours and yours alone. I want the job, Jerry.

I guess I have no choice, but I don’t want you working if we have children.

Four months later she was expecting their first child. He was hoping for a boy; she, a girl. Morning sickness and going to work was too much to handle. She remembered Mr. Aden’s face when she spoke to him. Mr. Aden, I need to let you know I will be leaving in two weeks.

Oh, Avi, no. Why?

We are expecting our first child. I’m so sick. I can barely get up in the morning, and I end up sick all day long. I can’t wait on customers if I have to run to the ladies room.

Oh, Avi, I am so sorry to hear that. You are so helpful here.

I’m really sorry. I need to give you my two weeks’ notice.

Avi, you practically run this store. I can leave the store because I know things will be done properly with you here.

Mr. Aden, I don’t want to leave, but if I am here alone and run to the ladies room, someone could rob you. I don’t want to be responsible for that. I really appreciate your hiring me and the trust you put in me. I just can’t work in this condition.

Avi, I wish it would have worked out. I remember what my wife went through as we waited for our children. If you want to come back, call; and I’ll gladly give you a recommendation for any job.

***

Seven months later, Avi held Jerry Todd Singleton in her arms. She didn’t get her wish, but he was beautiful. His blue eyes were the same shade as his dad’s. Jerry was proud of his son and helped out at home in addition to all of his responsibilities at school.

Jerry’s senior year was a nightmare. As he threw a pass, someone hit his knee from the side. Avi could still hear the pain in his voice, It feels like someone threw a hatchet and dislocated my knee.

The ambulance took him to the hospital, and Avi followed with Todd. She sat in the waiting room as they examined him because she was not allowed to take Todd into the room. They admitted Jerry and set up surgery for Monday morning. She called Gracie, one of her neighbors, and asked if she could watch Todd.

Gracie’s husband played football, and they became good friends. They traded babysitting once a week so they could get out without their children. It was nice to go shopping and eat lunch without chasing a two year old. Both of their children were about the same age and played well together. Gracie said, Avi, just bring Todd over. You’ll be able to stay with Jerry until after surgery.

She was grateful. The surgery went well. However, Jerry was not able to play the rest of his senior year because of the artificial knee. He concentrated on rehab for the knee, school, and graduated with honors. His first job was with the university working with quarterbacks.

They purchased a small home about five miles out of town. As soon as Todd entered kindergarten, she found a job at a local hotel as a receptionist with Mr. Aden’s recommendation and worked long enough to become the business manager. She would bring Todd to school as she went to work and pick him up at five. Todd’s school had extended daycare, and she paid for those two hours of extra care. If she had not put something in the slow cooker, or as Jerry called it crock pot, she picked up something on the way home.

Her life had been perfect. She even told Jerry about her father. He was understanding and said he would always love and protect her all the days of his life. And he did.

Tears escaped her eyes as she thought of that day. Todd was sick and Jerry didn’t feel well either. He told Avi he didn’t want to go to work. He would rather stay home and take care of Todd. There had been warnings of a storm. She had driven through storms before and gave little thought to the weather. This time the storm tore her life apart.

Storm warnings since had always made her tense because they reminded her of the day the tornado took her first and only true love away from her. With the phone lines down, there was little concern when Jerry didn’t answer her phone calls. Even today the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach returned as she remembered driving down the highway toward their home. It seemed as if the tornado had cut a path parallel to the highway as she witnessed the devastation in the distance. She prayed it missed her house.

About half a mile from home, the policeman at the checkpoint allowed her to continue with a warning as she produced a driver’s license with her address. It had been bad that morning, and they were still cleaning up the highway in some areas. She maneuvered around debris, and it took what seemed like forever to find her driveway. Her house was not there; all that was left was a pile of twisted trees.

At first she thought she had turned down the wrong driveway because the tornado had so devastated the area. It looked like a war zone; nothing was identifiable. She remembered the numb feeling as she turned the car around and drove toward the highway. I’ve been through so much. I must have turned down the wrong driveway. How could a loving God allow this to happen to me?

Turning right on the highway again, she slowly drove until she saw her neighbor’s address post. As she turned in their driveway, half of their house was gone. It was clearly her neighbor’s house. They were sitting outside and looked as if they were in shock. She drove up and stopped. They just looked at her, and she looked at them. Tears streamed down her face as the realization hit. Her home was gone. It wasn’t just a house – everything was gone: Jerry, Todd, their life together. She was alone.

Driving slowly back to where her home stood, she opened the car door and started yelling for Jerry and Todd. Surely, they had escaped and were sitting somewhere waiting just as her neighbors were. She cried and yelled until it felt as if she could not take in another breath. Then she screamed until all of the air left her lungs and fell to her knees sobbing and gasping for air.

She didn’t hear the truck or see the two men who walked toward her. They helped her stand and asked her questions she couldn’t remember. Mr. Patel arrived with one of his employees. The employee drove her car to the hotel, and Mr. Patel handed Avi a key to a room.

The next day, one of the employees took her shopping for the necessities. She had no clothes; everything was gone. She bought only what she needed because she kept thinking that Jerry and Todd would show up, and they would start their life again.

Mr. Patel had been so