Mike Singletary One-On-One

By Mike Singletary and Jay Carty

Football fans will remember the penetrating gaze of the eyes beneath the helmet of the Chicago Bears #55 throughout the 1980s and into the 1990s. NFL legend Mike Singletary's skills and determination as a linebacker were second to none. Now readers can meet the man of faith behind those amazing tackles. Together with bestselling author Jay Carty, Mike Singletary lets you in behind the scenes of a career in which the term "Christian football player" seems like an oxymoron. Prepare yourself to learn life lessons from an athlete and man who, in the midst of a competitive contact sport, gave his all to the glory of God. In these sixty heartfelt devotions, Mike and Jay will inspire and challenge you to draw nearer to God while giving your all, no matter where your "playing field" is.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
• Release date: Aug 4, 2005
• ISBN: 9781441225672

Mike Singletary

Mike Singletary is a college and NFL Hall of Fame member and a former All-Pro defensive captain of the Chicago Bears, from which he retired in 1992. Today he is a motivational speaker and corporate consultant, assistant head coach for the San Francisco 49ers, and devoted family man. His previous books include Singletary on Singletary, Calling the Shots, and Daddy's Home at Last. Mike lives in Northern California with his wife, Kim, and seven children.

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INTRODUCTION

HIS EYES

BY JAY CARTY

Roll a highlights video of classic moments in the NFL and we will see:

Dick Butkus snarling, covered in mud and blood, tape hanging from his wrist.

Bart Starr plunging into the end zone for a quarterback sneak on the frozen tundra of Lambeau Field.

The 49ers’ Dwight Clark coming out of nowhere to grab The Catch from Joe Montana.

Mike Singletary’s stare.

Mona Lisa had her smile. Mike has his eyes. Peering out from his helmet, his gaze pierced like a laser beam. The intensity showed, but number 50’s eyes on television and on the cover of Sports Illustrated didn’t do him justice. I first saw Mike’s eyes in real life when I met the NFL Hall-of-Fame linebacker at a Pro Athletes Outreach conference. The shake of his hand was warm, genial. His look was solid, intense. At the conference his eyes conveyed an extreme passion for Jesus, but I found myself wondering what it would have been like as an opposing lineman with those same eyes and that same passion directed toward me. No wonder he made the Pro Bowl 10 times and is listed as one of the top 100 football players of all time.

Mike Singletary played his college ball at Baylor University where he averaged more than 15 tackles a game. Three times he had more than 30 tackles in a single game and in the 1978 season he made 232 tackles. He was twice named an All-American. Mike hit opposing players so hard that he split 16 helmets during his college years.

Mike Singletary was a second-round selection by the Chicago Bears in the 1981 NFL draft. Most teams that had considered drafting Mike wanted him to play fullback, believing he was too small to play linebacker. However, Mike insisted on staying in his chosen position, even if it meant going lower in the draft. By his seventh game in a Bear uniform, he was the starting middle linebacker, a position he played for 12 seasons. Ten times he was named to the Pro Bowl team and twice he was the NFL’s defensive player of the year. His numbers are impressive: 172 starts, 1488 tackles, 19 sacks and 7 interceptions. He is arguably the most complete linebacker ever to play the game. He hit harder than any of his peers and covered receivers as well as anybody in the game ever has. No linebacker before or since has done both so well.

In 1985, Mike led the Chicago defense that only allowed opponents to score 11 points per game and sparked Coach Mike Ditka’s Bears to a 15-1 record. Chicago won the Super Bowl that season.

Mike Singletary only missed two games during his NFL career. After the 1991 season, he called it quits as a player. By then, his place as one of the all-time greats was secure. Mike no longer played middle linebacker, but he did not lose his intensity and dedication—he just applied it in other areas and grew as a person. He polished his communication skills and hit the road on the speaking circuit, both in churches and in the corporate world. He launched the Leadership Zone and marketed his leadership concepts. And he dedicated himself to his family and church.

Mike waited a decade before taking his first shot at coaching. He started as linebacker coach with the Ravens in 2003. Two years later—in 2005—he accepted the position of assistant head coach and linebacker coach with the San Francisco 49ers.

Mike Singletary is committed to working with 49ers head coach Mike Nolan to restore the 49ers as a winning team. Mike also has aspirations of being an NFL head coach himself; but for now, he sees himself as being in a season of preparation.

When Mike Singletary and I sat down to work on this book, he lived in the suburbs of Baltimore, a ten-minute drive from the Ravens’ practice facility. (Mike and his family have since moved to the Bay Area.) Mike and his wife, Kim, were gracious hosts. All seven of the Singletary children were amazingly polite, not only to me, but also to our servers at our meal together in a restaurant. They were also fun and loving, and kind to each other as well as to others. I could see that they enjoyed each other immensely. It was wonderful to see everyone participate in the family fun, including the six-year-old.

Kim is amazing as a mother to her children and as a wife to Mike. She ably juggles meals, games, school functions and lessons of all sorts. She is an exceptional woman: thoughtful, funny and full of grace.

The night I arrived in Baltimore, Mike was at a preseason game, so Kim was there to pick me up. I had gone east to spend time with Mike working on this book. The three of us arrived at the Singletary’s home at about the same time. I was surprised at how easily Mike shifted from one hot seat to another. He went from giving instructions as a coach to recounting myriad details of his life and career without missing a beat—moreover, he never lost his passion. Even when Mike Singletary relaxes, he does so with intensity. He is the most intense man I have ever met.

Mike is intentional about everything he does. There were no wasted moments. We fit our work in where we could. We even talked in the car on the freeway while going to his son’s football game, during breaks between coaches’ meetings, at lunch time and after his family time, late into the evening. He never wasted a moment during that visit nor during our subsequent discussions in preparing this manuscript. I think as you read you will feel a bit of his intensity, too.

Mike has his workout equipment in his home. He has always done his off-season and preseason weight training alone. That gives us another clue as to his disciplined nature. It’s not easy to push yourself without help. But he did it for 12 years as a Bear. These days, Mike weighs in at 218 and measures only 4 percent body fat. Not bad! On the practice field I watched him jog over to his coaching station. He still runs like an athlete, and his eyes haven’t changed.

Mike is single-minded about seeking and doing God’s will. His focus is on his prime directive of being the best possible Christian, husband, father and coach he can be—in that order. He is in love with Jesus Christ and totally committed to obeying God’s Word. As a husband Mike is lovingly thoughtful; as a dad he is a firm disciplinarian but tender in the process. As a coach, he is like a pastor caring for his flock.

This is the third One-on-One book I have cowritten. I had the honor of teaming up with legendary coach John Wooden and NASCAR great Darrell Waltrip on the first two. As in the other One-on-One books, Mike Singletary One-On-One is intended to be read as a devotional. And we want you to interact. On the first page of each reading, Mike recounts a story from his life—many of these stories read like an NFL highlight film! On the next page, I take you further into the point of the day. Sometimes I draw from my experiences, other times I simply plug you into a biblical perspective. At the end of each reading, we include a prayer and suggested Bible verses to study.

As you read each entry, imagine number 50’s eyes peering at you from inside his helmet. Picture the NFL Hall of Famer passionately prodding you to be more like Jesus. Then, as you say the prayer and read the verses, imagine Jesus’ eyes gazing at you with grace, hope and promise.

Tighten up your chinstrap. We’re going one-on-one.

SPECIAL INTRODUCTION

AN OFF-ROAD LIFE

BY KIM SINGLETARY

My oldest daughter, Kristen, has just graduated from high school. Like every 18-year-old, she faces choices about her future, specifically which college to attend. Applying, waiting, wondering, anticipating with Kristen takes me back.

Deciding where one will spend his or her college years is huge. There are so many questions to ask: How far should I be away from my family? How large should the school be? What should my major be? Which program has the most respect in the business world? Which school has the best-possible mates? I must confess that I wish I had put a little more thought into this life-altering decision than I did when I went off to college.

For Mike, it was much different than for me. He was highly sought after by Baylor University’s football coach, Grant Teaff. I was a young coed coming to Waco, Texas, from the North. Little did I know that the whole civil war thing hadn’t really been laid to rest!

In 1978, I was a senior in high school in Sterling Heights, Michigan, a suburb of Detroit. My family was no different from most in our neighborhood. My father worked at General Motors and my mother stayed home until the college tuition bills came in—mine were the first for our family. I had fairly good grades and knew I wanted to go to college; I just didn’t know where. We were Baptists and my parents wanted me to go to a Christian school, but none in the area were particularly appealing to me. My dad worked with a gentleman whose daughter attended Baylor. He said, All I know is she never wants to come home during the breaks.

The thought of warmer winters was attractive to me. Moreover, Baylor had a swim team (I swam competitively for my high school) and a great law school (at the time I had delusions of grandeur). I knew Baylor was in Texas somewhere and was a Southern Baptist school. Unbelievably, I applied, was accepted and was assigned a roommate—all sight unseen. Back then there were no websites to check out. I just thought going to Texas sounded intriguing, so off I went. The curious thing about that is that I sound like quite the adventurer. The truth is, I was definitely not adventurous! It is my belief still today that God oversaw the whole process—my thoughts, my feelings, my spontaneity—as a way of allowing me to meet my future husband.

When I arrived in Texas in August that year, I noticed a few makeshift signs on buildings and along the roads that read, Yankee Go Home and Damn Yankees. I had no clue that these applied to me! It was during the oil embargo, and many northerners had lost their jobs and had headed south to find work. Texans apparently didn’t like that too much. Nonetheless, I was excited about my pending future in my new state.

[Image not included because of rights restrictions.]

A quick scan of everyone in the dorms netted the conclusion that every coed was a blonde and a former cheerleader. I was neither. I think it was days before I saw another brunette. The blond highlights I was sporting weren’t going to cut it. What’s more, I definitely needed to grow my hair long. I think I was the only one whose hair length was above my shoulders. The second indication that I might be in for trouble was the fact that I clearly didn’t get the memo about the coordinating dorm-room accessories. Most of the other rooms were decorated to the nines, complete with matching quilts, rugs and happy window valances. And pink. The entire dorm was a sea of pink. These rooms were more eccentric than the room I had left at home.

Perhaps the most intimidating difference was my northern accent (which, until that point, I never knew I had). When I spoke, I was met with a variety of responses, everywhere from Where are you from? to that blank stare that says, I have no clue what you’re saying. All of the external factors screamed at me: You don’t belong here! In spite of it all, my parents—who had brought me to school—left and, naively, I moved the sinking feeling that I didn’t belong to the back of my mind. I was excited about my new adventure.

I joined a group called the Sideline Buddies, where two or three girls were assigned to a football player to bake, decorate and generally cheer for him before each game. It was a great way to get to know some of the players. While a sideline buddy, I caught the eye of number 63, Mike Singletary. He said that he knew he was going to marry me the first moment he saw me. After a few conversations with him, I had him pegged as a dreamer, a big talker and an extremely arrogant jock. He could talk: I’m going to be the greatest linebacker that Baylor ever had. I’m going to go pro. One day, I’ll be one of the greatest linebackers that ever played this game. I knew the moment I saw you that you would be my wife. Every line got the same reaction from me: Riiiight.

The fact that Mike was African-American made a dating relationship impossible—a non-issue. There was not a chance. It wasn’t even on my radar screen. What I was OK with, though, was a friendship. Mike and I talked and talked, and we walked and talked some more. I was so different from many of the coeds there, but this didn’t seem to matter to him. Actually, he seemed to genuinely enjoy my company.

As my friendship with Mike blossomed, there were some rumblings around campus. Some people reckoned that I was spending too much time with him. I had some girlfriends who cautioned that it looked bad for me to be spending so much time with an African American, but in my heart I didn’t think much of their warning because Mike and I were just friends.

It was when I went home for the summer after my freshman year that I knew I was in trouble. I dated guys in Michigan but found myself missing Mike. We talked a couple times that summer, but I grew a bit nervous because I was becoming aware of my true feelings for him—and they were more than just friendship feelings. I handled these thoughts the only way I could, with good, old-fashioned denial. When we returned to Baylor for our sophomore year, I didn’t think about the future; I simply enjoyed each day with Mike, as friends—but I paid a social price for the time I spent with him.

Before long, Mike was getting national attention as a linebacker and he was becoming Baylor’s golden boy. With an NFL career becoming a greater reality for Mike, Baylor wasn’t thrilled about having anything stand in the way of that. We both faced pressure from our friends and families to break up.

Finally the pressure worked, at least for a while. The summer after Mike was drafted, we broke up. He was facing the greatest opportunity of his life, and he could really only concentrate on one thing at a time. We were apart for two weeks, and without knowing it, we both agonized over the decision. He sought counsel from his pastor and his coach. I dealt with it alone. I thought about putting my feelings for him aside and choosing the easier route. Our racial differences seemed to be such an issue for so many people. I was miserable without him—but clearly everyone else would be happy if I moved on.

For the first time in my life, I had to make a very tough decision—and I had to do it on my own. Before that point, I had always chosen to take the safe, ripple-free path. Not only would this decision cause ripples, it would stir up tidal waves!

I was the original rule-following, stay-in-the-box, pleaser child. I had fully intended to stay that way for the rest of my life. I figured I’d be safe and predictable forever. Then Mike came along. I was fascinated with his out-of-the-box, structureless, go-for-broke, ridiculously optimistic outlook. He thought big thoughts, made even bigger goals, and dreamed of the impossible. He made the road less traveled look a lot more exciting.

Would I spend the rest of my life being safe? Predictable? Pleasing to others, in spite of my own feelings? I saw this as my greatest decision. Life with Mike, albeit difficult, would be much more exciting. I chose to take the risk on a love that was way out of any box I had ever known.

Twenty years later, looking back at our marriage I see that our road less traveled has often been an off-road experience, and still is to this day. At times, when I gaze at the wider road, the road more traveled, I long for some smooth terrain. If it were up to Mike, we’d never be on a paved road! Fortunately, we chose God’s path.