Everyone's An Asshole Except Kids and Seniors: A Book of Normal Thinking

By Jeremy Ian

“It’s what’s on the inside that counts.”
Really? So why is What do you do the first thing people always ask?
“Honesty’s the best policy.”
Is that why people prefer to hide behind screens instead of communicating in person?
“Do what you love.” What? Everyone? Who’s going to pick up the trash, flip the burgers, pour the lattes, and all the rest of the hated jobs that make our economy go round?
“Success takes hard work.”
Please. Anyone who believes this and isn’t a multi-millionaire deserves to be asked: Then why didn’t you work harder?
These and the rest of the false feel-good quotes that flood our social media walls often confuse rather than inspire, keep us dissatisfied in our relationships and jobs, and make us feel like we’re never good enough.
Thankfully, this book is full of logical and factual thoughts that explain how — despite all the positivity out there — the world continues to get worse. And why the problems you may be having in it have little to do with there being anything wrong with you.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Jeremy Ian
• Release date: Jan 19, 2015
• ISBN: 9781311449849

Book preview

Everyone_Cover

EVERYONE’S AN ASSHOLE

Except kids and seniors

A book of normal thinking

by Jeremy Ian

© 2015 by Jeremy Ian

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or by any means, digital, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior consent of the author.

Edited by Allister Thompson

Cover Design by Jeremy Ian

Interior design and layout by Emma Dolan

www.normalthinking.com

ISBN-13 978-1506101569

ISBN-10: 1506101569

Library of Congress and Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication data available upon request.

CONTENTS

Introduction

About this Book

Society

Accept yourself

Get more out of life

Don’t worry, be happy

Just do it

Be grateful

If all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you?

Be happy for the success of others

A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met

At least you’re not some starving kid in Africa

Parents should be role models

Two wrongs don’t make a right

Do unto others as you want done to you

Be social (media)

Share with others (online)

Get over yourself

Human Nature

Find your life’s purpose

Make love, not war

Money’s the root of all evil

It’s better to give than receive

Thank God

It’s good for the soul

Happiness comes from within

It’s what’s inside that counts

Don’t be so emotional

If I were you I’d…

Honesty’s the best policy

Don’t be an asshole

Work

Success takes hard work

Do what you love

The cream rises to the top

Things will turn around

Education is the best investment

Relationships

Once a cheater, always a cheater

Relationships are based on trust

A good man is hard to find

Don’t settle

If someone loves you, they’ll…

Someone will love you for who you are

Just because you argue doesn’t mean you don’t love each other

Look on the bright side of life

INTRODUCTION

Another day, another lost job and failed relationship. Standard fare, I suppose, for many these days.

And just like many, off I went to therapy to see what, perhaps, I should fix about me.

So tell me a bit about what’s going on, starts the therapist.

Well, my boss was an asshole, my ex was an asshole, and you know, it seems like everyone’s an asshole these days, I replied.

Well, it was not long into the conversation before the therapist began to sound a lot like how our social media news feeds look. You know, what with all those inspirational quotes and daily positive aphorisms people keep posting that had him saying things that went something to the effect of:

Happiness comes from within, Learn to accept yourself, Be more grateful, Things will turn around and best of all, Jeremy, the world’s not against you, you know?

Yes, it is, I said.

Oh, and how so? he replied.

"Well, Doc, isn’t it true that our economy just wants one thing: to continually grow — which requires us to produce, spend, and consume non-stop?

"But of course, for it to do that it first needs to create the desire and want for more in us. And looking at how everyone’s wanting more out of their careers, relationships, themselves — along with basically everything else in life — we’re wanting more now than we ever have before.

"Well, you do know where stress comes from, don’t you, Doc? It starts the moment we want — for when we want what we don’t have, we create a mental gap between the two that causes tension. And that tension is stress.

"And wouldn’t you know it, now our jobs couldn’t be any more stressful, our relationships have never failed as often as they buckle under the stress, and therapists’ offices just like this are filled more than ever with people suffering from low self-esteem, anxiety and depression — all conditions that are a direct result of too much stress.

So by all means, tell me again, Doctor ... how is it that the world’s not against us?

He stayed silent.

There’s not much anyone can say to that — along with the rest of what’s written in this book.

ABOUT THIS BOOK

Everyone’s an asshole these days.

This thought is as obvious to you as it is me; otherwise, you wouldn’t have picked up this book in the first place.

And if you’re anything like me, you must roll your eyes nearly right out of your head at all these inspirational quotes, daily aphorisms, wise words of advice, motivational sayings and the rest of the positive thoughts that are clogging up our social media news feeds and pouring out the mouths of halfwits everywhere these days.

You know, the ones that go something to the effect of: it’s better to give than receive, honesty’s the best policy, do unto others as you want done to you, it’s what’s inside that counts, success takes hard work, along with the rest that would have one thinking the world is a friendly, fair and accepting place — when on the contrary, people are becoming a bunch of mean, disrespectful, unaccepting, narcissistic assholes.

Good intentions aside, these thoughts do more harm than good because they are false and cause people to become ignorant of reality.

Well, that’s what I think, anyway.

And I’m guessing you do too. That’s why I’ve written this book. Unlike all these quotes, sayings or other books that attempt to change your thinking, this one’s been written to affirm it.

It’s simply a book you can sit there nodding in agreement with as you read what I call ‘normal thinking’. This consists of common sense, factual and insightful thoughts that show how society, human nature, the economy and our relationships make it so that many of these feel-good thoughts we hear and read can’t possibly be true.

Everyone’s an asshole, except kids and seniors, for example, is a normal thought. And the qualifier at the end is an insight as to why it’s true.

Now, of course, who am I, and what makes me an expert on what it means to think normally?

Well, after spending my early years in therapy for an assortment of anxiety- and depression-related issues, I started to suspect my problems were less about there being something wrong with me and more about there being something seriously wrong with the world in which we live. I was annoyed that I should be the one to fix problems I didn’t even cause.

Later, after spending many years satisfying my curiosity in such fields as neuroscience, sociology, biology, psychology and even primatology, I’ve come to realize that my thinking was right.

So now I continue to go to therapy, seeing multiple therapists at a time, even, not because I need it but simply to challenge the so-called experts of the mind (much like I showed at the beginning of this book) simply for the purpose of refining and validating the thoughts I think now and have put into this book.

Just in case you’re interested in checking to see if your thinking is normal too.

SOCIETY

ACCEPT YOURSELF

And what? Collapse the economy?

That’s exactly what

Reviews for Everyone's An Asshole Except Kids and Seniors

[Nomayne McIntosh · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Hello to the elephant in the room! This book is something I will get my teenagers to read. It is simply stating the truth which nobody wants to say.