Can't You See Me Scream? Discovering the Silence of Child Sexual Abuse
By G. C. Peyton
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About this ebook
This gripping true story of an idyllic family’s discovery of child sexual abuse takes you through the discovery and unraveling of the nightmare. It explores the back-story, navigates through the painful decisions made to uncover the secrets and travels down the difficult road to finding the strength it took to put the pieces together. Read how they moved from discovery to releasing their hurts to be free to heal and grow beyond their pain.
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Can't You See Me Scream? Discovering the Silence of Child Sexual Abuse - G. C. Peyton
Can't You See Me Scream? Discovering the Silence of Child Sexual Abuse
By G.C. Peyton
Published by ChosenButterflyPublishing LLC at Smashwords
Copyright G.C. Peyton 2014
Smashword Edition
www.cb-publishing.com
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Table of Contents
Dedication
Preface
Chapter 1-Introduction to a Nightmare
Chapter 2- Can't Wake Up Yet
Chapter 3- The Backstory
Chapter 4- Wading through Rising Water
Chapter 5- Painful Decisions
Chapter 6- Facing My Fears
Chapter 7- Putting All the Pieces Together
Chapter 8- Where Do I Began
Epilogue
Dedication…..
This book is dedicated to all the children and their families whose lives have been forever changed by sexual abuse. May they receive God’s merciful healing and experience the freedom of forgiveness to grow and live beyond their pain.
To those who act fearlessly to break the silence of sexual abuse--may the wings of angels continue to lift you up and soar you above any obstacles in your way. May you always remember that God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind to accomplish all that He has for us to do.
Preface…..
The greatest miracle in the world to me is giving birth. To see your baby for the first time is an experience that some cannot put into words; even though you know it’s the greatest joy you’ve ever felt. You’re all prepared: you’ve got the bottles, diapers, blankets, baby furniture and all the neat little clothes. Finally, after all the months of waiting, the magical moment is here. You look into your baby’s eyes and your heart melts. You are now a parent with a huge responsibility. So, off to home you go. But wait - they didn’t give us the manual. So, what do we do now? If you’re like most of us, you learn as you go.
There is no manual for raising kids that will guarantee what your experience will be or how they will turn out. You do your best and pray for the same. I always thought that when I had children, they would be like me. They would sit quietly and do what they are told... da-da, da-da, da-da (well, not exactly). One of my biggest ‘ah-ha’ moments as a parent was when I discovered that children are people too. They have their own personalities and they do things the way they are wired to. Even with that realization, we are still challenged repeatedly with being a parent and raising kids. We don’t always know what to do in every situation; we don’t always have the right answer and we don’t always make the right decisions - but we try our best. Sometimes we miss the mark and don’t interpret the signs correctly. Sometimes it’s a minor thing that doesn’t matter much, however sometimes it’s huge and we miss the signs completely. Sometimes it’s because we close our eyes and ears; however, sometimes our eyes and ears are wide open but the deafening silence prevents us from seeing and hearing. When our eyes and ears are wide open, there can be other factors and forces preventing us from seeing through the veil and hearing the screams. Child sexual abuse is one of those ugly nightmares where unfortunately, we sometimes miss the signs and don’t hear or see the screams. This is the story of silent screams.
Chapter 1
Introduction to a Nightmare
Through the eyes of a child, I could say that I grew up with rose-colored glasses. We had a typical family for the time; dad worked and mom was a housewife. We certainly didn’t have everything we wanted, but we surely had everything we needed. Life was good.
I was born and raised in one of the big cities in America by two, loving parents. I am the middle child between an older sister, a brother and a younger sister. To say I had the ‘middle child’ syndrome would be putting it mildly. Everyone seemed to have something special about them. My older sister wore the tag as the oldest. My brother wore the tag as the only boy. My younger sister wore the tag of being the baby. Hmmm, what did I have that was special about me? Well, I eventually learned that my parents were happy when we did well in school, so I began to wear that as my tag - ‘good in school’. I wanted to make them happy. I am the only one in my family who graduated from college, then continued my educational goals to earn post-graduate degrees. I love my family and I love God. Life is good.
Growing up, my life was wonderful. Our parents clearly loved each other, they loved us - and they showed it. I can remember seeing our mom and dad dancing together as us kids sat on the couch and giggled. Our giggling soon turned to dread when mom and dad would reach out for us to join in the dancing. Oh no, here we go again! Trust me, we were more than happy being spectators. Daddy often told us how much he loved our mother and she returned that love by how she took care of him and us. Daddy was really strict; Mommy was more lenient and she often comforted us