When Sally was 9...A Story of Child Abuse

By Rome

This is a true story and first began in Singapore. Many names and events have been altered to protect the identity of the individuals mentioned in this story. "When Sally was 9..." is part of a series that discusses abuse in an Asian society.

Abuse, regardless of its forms, is a repressive situation where the victim is self-induced into a constant state of submission, sometimes, bearing little or no ability to protect from this perpetual onslaught of terror and injustice. At most times violence is used to effect submission but in the case of "When Sally was 9...", you will see that violence is not always the approach that perpetrators take to render control over their "victim".

In this initial book, you will not only find yourself developing a distaste for the father but you will also see bits of Singapore as it happened through the victim's eyes. There is racism, there is of course the unhappiness that emanates from Sally's own home and there is the challenge of being a minority that arises from being in a country like Singapore. At the time the character was growing up, Singapore was also enjoying the independence of being an autonomous state of its own. It had just gained independence from Malaysia and was fast becoming a powerful nation of its own but for Sally as an Indian, it was a struggle when being Indian meant being second class, when being brown means you are considered “dirty”. "When Sally was Nine" details the life of a young Asian child as she maneuvers life through a rocky path where being a girl in a home dominated by a tyrannical and manipulative father means life is just not caked to be too pretty in the end...

• Language: English
• Publisher: Rome
• Release date: May 14, 2011
• ISBN: 9781458015877

Rome

Rome now lives in the United States where her passion for justice and civil liberties comes forth through writing that she hopes conveys the complexity of the human mind in all its most variant forms.

Book preview

WHEN SALLY WAS 9…

Part of the Forgetting Sally Series

By Rome

Copyright 2011 Rome

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Dedication

To Bala

who has given so much already

Contents

≈ 1 The Girl Named Sally

≈ 2 Mama's Parents

≈ 3 Ms. Pereira

≈ 4 Ms. Pereira is a Cheater

≈ 5 Tatha Visits Sally

≈ 6 Of Cats and Dogs

≈ 7 A Scrooge for a Father

≈ 8 A Thief in the Family

≈ 9 The One with No Soul

≈ 10 Cries No One Hears

≈ 11 When Loved Ones Say Goodbye

Chapter 1:The Girl Named Sally

It started with something soft that brewed outside; a gentle moaning that grew somewhat stronger until Sally decided that home was the place to be after all. It was going to be a wet day, she could tell. Already, she could hear the deafening thunder as white bolts of lightning glazed the skies. They frightened her intensely and when they ruthlessly streaked the dark Singapore skies with threatening glows, Sally knew the rain would patter down hard and mercilessly. Puddles of muddy waters were already forming where Mama had been tilling the land.

The little girl yanked her head a little away from the leaking windows and watched as the now strong tropical winds hustled the rain sending droplets of water pattering down hard on the walkways and into their porch. She sighed a little wishing they could at least play Rounders tomorrow. It was a game she liked and now, it had to be canceled. It was one of the only games where everyone from the neighborhood, gathered to play without any fights at all. Most afternoons were spent out with the neighborhood children but now, there was an emptiness that seemed to settle in as she wondered what she could do in a house where only rules applied all day long. She looked at the time. There was still plenty of time left before the evening took over but surely there would be something she could do to keep out of trouble?

She wished things would be different but nothing would ever change not with the way things were expected in their home. Papa sought a regiment for them and a life so Spartan she wished he would sometimes realize she was still a child. She feared when he came near. Oh, she always did. You see, there was something so frightening about the way he came close to you almost like he could strangle you. There were times when she wondered if he really wanted her at all. He called her wicked names of all kinds and Mama always joined in fueling his anger each and every minute he taunted her. Sometimes, when he seemed sane and was not talking much, she could still see that he was watching her from afar, almost reproaching her and she didn’t know why. She really did not know why Papa never liked her and Mama never helped very much. When Papa hit, she just joined in the game.

And unlike all children who had some toys to keep them company during a day indoors, Sally had none of such luxuries but she had books and they were company for her. Books always gave her the dreams and told her about good things that happened to others even in bad times and she liked that. It made her dream a lot and it was nice sometimes going into a world where things worked out well for you. She smiled at the thought of the idea. She would read a book but going into the home library was a major step. It was a daring stunt she took wanting to spend her time in a place no one else dared venture but she couldn’t imagine making a mess in the room. She was a big girl and she was already helping Mama to clean the house and sweep the floors. But sometimes, she really wished she had a dollhouse, just like the one Pearly got for Christmas. She wanted one so badly but they wouldn’t buy her one at all. Not that they even thought of one for her! Mama would always walk away when she asked for a small cooking set. A dollhouse would be too much to ask and so she never dared to open her mouth.

The home library sat in a dismal section of the house and was a room that stored many of her father’s books and it was in this library that Sally would secretly manifest herself with the reads that told on such great people as Helen Keller, Edmund Kant, Aristotle and Bertrand Russell. The books kept her company providing her a rich imaginative ground which she construed ever so often when she felt alone and unwanted. She had paged through Helen Keller’s colorful autobiography and held in fascinated awe as she circumvented her deaf and blind state to reach above all in support of mankind and of John F. Kennedy and his fight for the truth. She wondered at the kind of people who sprang from the pages of the books she read and wondered why her own father’s life had not changed from these reads.

When she looked all around her and saw the books that made her happy and welcome life, she wished her own life would eventually take her to greatness. Today it was that book that lay up so high on the shelf which seemed to amaze her. The book that had the face of the great American man with the tall hat and the big, black beard. Sally sighed hard.

Sometimes, the books lay anchored on shelves that were unreachable reaching far and as high away from little prying hands that could do untold damage. Still the girl with the plain name of Sally was determined to sink her hand onto that book that stood so far away from her. She placed a large stool close to the book cabinet lying by the frosted glass windows steadily reaching out for the Abe Lincoln book. It wasn’t pushed into the shelf so much, so she reckoned if she tried hard enough she could get it off. She stretched her fingers a little more outwards. Just a little more and the book would fall into her hands, or so she thought. The book did fall but landed with a great big thud on the wooden floor sending vibrations hurtling across the old house. It was then that she felt the steps thunder through, each step taken shelling her with apprehension and fright as she heard him sound through the library flaring his most fearsome calls yet upon the little intruder who had entered the forbidden room. She was afraid.

Sally quickly got down and reached for the fallen book. The book had spread its cover outwards and she grabbed it as quick as she could brushing the little dog ears that created within and hoping to iron out the unfortunate creases that resulted from her feeble hands. And that’s when she knew he was near because a large shadow cast over her, a shadow that spelled an ominous note for her. She did not dare look up at the ogre standing close, her body already quivering at the presence she held fearfully. He frightened her each time he came upon her so suddenly and she would then await his loud roar each time she faltered. She was afraid of his hands. They hurt a lot when he used them but she was quite sure she did not do anything bad.

What are you doing with my books? I have kept them perfect without a dog ear until you children came along! Let me see what you are doing! he demanded as he grabbed his precious book from Sally’s hands.

He looked at the book he so marvelously preserved; some of his books still looked new despite him procuring them from the 1950s and 60s even the book which dated back to the prewar years which he snitched from his sister’s father-in-law. The old man never asked it back so it made sense to keep it and now, it sat like a treasure on his shelves together with his other books, a bastion of books that fed him an incredible amount of stories to match his own to tell. He was so proud at the manner he kept his property and as he held the book on Abraham Lincoln, he looked at his curious daughter seeking to glean the pages off the book. He hoped she would learn something from these books and make him proud. Having acquired the blood line from his wife which he considered to be of ill-repute, he wondered if his children would harness any intelligence at all and follow the ways of his own people whom he regarded gloriously.

He pivoted his attention back to his frightened daughter wondering what sat on her mind when she walked into his library without notice. He looked at her as she shrank further whimpering softly onto the floor but keeping her complete attention upwards to him lest he should suddenly cast his strong hands again on her person. She hated it whenever he lost control of himself. It hurt each time he beat her. She could at least hold her head and ward off the blows when it started. The last time he did a swing on her, he had broken her jaw and they never took her to the doctor’s. They never did anything to stop her jaw from growing so badly.

She waited for the blows but nothing happened and Sally looked up confused.

You know why Papa reads all these books Sally? he sounded gently this time as he reflected greatly upon his person, his eyes focused on his frightened daughter. From books, you learn about people and you learn how you can be a great one up here. If it wasn’t for me Sally, you would be living in a small home. Papa is a smart man, he pointed out astutely as he held his finger to his head. And Abraham Lincoln was a very great man. Learn from him and learn to be great.

He paraded himself willing each information he could to the little girl he called Sally, telling her why she should read more of the books so that she made her life more worthwhile and of use to society. And the little girl listened to the man whom she feared and yet who made some sense with his information. He had read all his years and with it, he had harnessed a plethora of information which gave him a lot to speak about. This time he ended off on a softer note.

Make sure you keep Papa’s books properly. You see this book, he boasted as he paged through the old book a little at a time under her little nose so that she could see the manner in which he had kept the books. But the smell of the already yellowed pages only repulsed the little girl and she wished he would not hold it so close to her face. It made her want to cough.

They are well kept, he told her ignoring the grimace on her little brown face, Nobody keeps books the way I do. I do not believe in hurting my books because these books give you knowledge and you must accord the respect to books if you want to learn from them further, he reminded firmly and with that, the monster of the man left the room leaving her with a little fright moving towards the pit of her stomach. She was glad he had left the room.

She looked at her book and settled in paging through and learning, aspiring each time to be what Abraham Lincoln sought to be, a person of truth and a person who willed a sanctuary of hope to those who held their beliefs strong in him. Sally loved her books and they kept her company at most times. She really hoped she could be like the people whom she read so profoundly about. But life had yet to unfold before her the leap that would take her forward.

She finally settled down to read her book, a thick hard cover book that did not seem to wrestle so easily in her little hands. She was a thin girl, almost skin and bones. Many had joked that she was as light as wind but Sally would not listen to the bad jokes people made of her. She ignored them. She was thin indeed almost weak too but she had a strong mind which she used to fight with. She turned the pages of the book wishing and imagining the world of Abe Lincoln and the little boy who soon came to be the great President of the United States. She could tell he was poor like they were so maybe, if she tried to study hard she too could be great like him one day? Maybe, all she needed to do was to see what he did but he did not have someone like Mama and a monster like her Papa. Abe Lincoln’s parents seemed too nice. But she smiled each time she read the nice parts. The stories she read were filled with reason and truth, and for little Sally, it almost seemed as if they gave her the wisdom and love to reach out into herself to be strong and a fighter. She would work hard, that was perhaps a start.

So many thoughts would run through the little girl’s head as she sat and read her book in the dimly lit room. So many reasons that told her she was special and wanted by the world. She pushed up her cheap, thick rimmed glasses sitting heavy on her nose bridge and remained enraptured in her precious book. But darkness would cloud through the room blanketing her almost and Sally looked up at the time that read on the clock. She had been in the room for a while now. The rain had stopped a while since and she decided to take her break from reading. She reached for the high shelf and tucked the book gently away then looked around to make sure she had not unsettled any of the other items in her father’s library before she finally made her way out to the family room.

She found her father nestled in his favorite armchair, busy reading The Straits Times, the leading newspaper read which fostered the political voice that engendered the policies of the Singapore government. He loved to dabble with the political reads of the local world and harness reads from the other political magazines that he would sometimes buy at newspaper stands while he was out with his uncle Param. So enthralled was he in gleaning the latest read of the world of the Tamil Tigers that he barely noticed the little girl when she made her way out to the garden. And Sally never looked back but took her steps towards the wet yard where she knew her mother would be out with her plants. The rain had indeed stopped but the ground was almost muddy and her mother was out weeding her plants using a stick to stir the soil around.

Sally, come here and give me a hand. Take away this earthworm now, she ordered as she quickly wrenched herself from the ugly moment when the earthworm would wriggle its way to the surface with a slimy and disgusting tug from the wet potted soil. The rainy season always spelt the active entry of the earthworms to the yard. And Sally could already see many making their visibility close to the surface. Surely her mother wasn’t planning to single each one of them out?

Yucks, it just makes me feel so dirty when I see these creatures moving and wriggling like that, she said giving Sally a squeamish look. Take that one Sally and the other too, she said her body almost contorting with sudden revulsion. She hated the dreaded creatures and the manner they would squirm so much yet she adored gardening minus the earthworms of course. It was the only few joys she had, that and baking her favorite goodies.

But Ma, you need the earthworms to keep the plants healthy, reminded Sally instinctively as she looked at her mother for an agreement but there was none. The woman was totally revolted at the idea of the slimy creatures making their way on her turf.

No, no, take those things away Sally. Do as you are told. Just take them out and leave them there, she ordered as she pointed at the large land that lay outside their gate. Sally listened and laughed. That land belonged to the Singapore government and no one messed with that land. You could get fined if you used land that did not belong to you.

"Do it Sally!’ she pounded again.

Okay Ma, declared Sally finally. The last she needed was arguing with grown ups especially her parents.

Slowly she took the earthworms in her hands and walked out past her gate and left them to dig their way through the public land just a short distance away. You will be better off here. At least you will not be fined! she said with a laugh leaving them gently on the grass.

Singapore had been making its way as one of the fine cities in the world. Prime Minister Lee Kwan Yew thought that if they worked hard, they could be the next Switzerland and everyone would come visit Singapore. It was all over the news but she knew using land that did not belong to them, could also fetch some notorious fines they could do without. That was also in the news and people did get caught eventually. Everything was always accounted for in Singapore.

Sally! There’s some more here! Come quickly! sounded her mother again desperately and Sally obeyed running to her mother and giving her help with the little garden they had. Her mother loved to grow orchids and roses. They did grow well nonetheless even without the earthworms and Sally would sometimes take the flowers to the prayer room and lay them down. She loved to do that each time the flowers bloomed and her mother did not mind that. Mama just loved growing the flowers and Sally loved sanctifying the prayer room with all the flowers she could get.

The gate clanged open disrupting their little work in the garden and her brother slid in quietly one arm holding his dirty soccer ball. Sally could see the mud already caking on the ball. She looked at her brother. His eyes held unspeakable guilt and he seemed to have lost track of the time again. He had just come home after a fervent game of soccer with his friends and now, he walked in directing the attention elsewhere by laughing at his mother for banishing the earthworms away. Kamala wasn’t too pleased and ignored her older son’s amusement continuing her usual habit of raking the soil with a stick. But he laughed overtly again when she shuddered at the sight of more creepy crawlies submerging again.

Go in and have your bath Ravi! she ordered angrily upon seeing the mischievous twinkle in her young son’s eyes. You look so dirty and look at that perspiration dripping on you. You were supposed to be back an hour ago, she maintained sternly when she saw him chuckling relentlessly. Make sure you do not disturb Ajit. He is sleeping right now.

But Mama, I couldn’t come home in the rain, he moaned, I had to go to Amrith’s house, he stated coolly.

That boy is bad news. You mix with bad company Ravi and you become bad! she retorted but the boy only laughed more. And it didn’t take long for her words to be heard for another voice soon bellowed close by.

Kamala, why are you picking on the boy again? roared the familiar monster who kept his ears plastered to the wall.

It was her father sounding out his temper again each time he felt his son was chided for no reason. Somehow Ravi had no trouble securing a devoted response from his father. No other could cross the old man’s path when it came to judgment made upon his older son.

Her mother continued her work silently and hustled her brother into the house with no further comment. She looked at Sally eager to take her into her fold.

Your father does not like to be told but he is bringing that boy up so wrong. Look at Ravi, he seems to have no idea when to come home. It is already getting dark and he does not even give the same attention to his books, she stated angrily as she shook her head, quite fed up at having to be told by her husband again. He is a smart boy but if you do not study, you can’t get anywhere! Not in Singapore! We are second class citizens here in Singapore. If we do not work twice as hard as the Chinese, we are done for, she lamented and Mama was quite right there.

It took a little more digging and more earthworms out of her way before Kamala reckoned the time had come for food to be laid on the table. She had cooked in the morning and simply needed to heat up the food for dinner. They were not rich and her mother worked hard to dish out the meals with the meager fifty dollars that her father gave her for the weekly groceries. Yet, despite the terrible budgetary constraints that existed in their home, they lived in their own private home in a respectable neighborhood surrounded by government officials and small time businessmen. Her father had always prided that it was he who made the most worthy decision to move to a private house and not to an apartment which he dispelled as a pigeon’s coop.

So many times Papa would make fun of those who lived in apartment buildings in Singapore claiming that only those of no means would reside in such small habitats. It always deafened and hurt Sally whenever he said such vile words on people he considered to be not as fortunate as them. Yet, these same people who lived in the tiny apartments seemed to go out for holidays all the time, wore nice clothes and took their children out to the Big Splash and other nice places. Why couldn’t they do the same?

Indeed, only the rich could really afford to live on landed property in Singapore. Most