Pinocchio's Perfect Penis

By Sassy Johns

Pinocchio is created as an anatomically correct puppet to service Geppetto's wife. Carved from wood, he is always up, hard, and ready to satisfy her. But when the Blue Fairy brings him to life, she (and every other female he comes into contact with) gets more than she bargained for...
A Sexy and Silly Story for You, from Sassy Johns.
WARNING: ADULTS ONLY. CONTAINS SEXUAL CONTENT.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Sassy Johns
• Release date: Jan 16, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311770790

Sassy Johns

The best advice I ever got about sex was from one of my randy old aunts (yes, I have more than one randy old aunt). She told me that "Sex is supposed to be fun, so don't take it so seriously." I guess I've taken that to the extreme in my life and in my writing, and I'm here to help you learn to laugh during sex as well. Trust me; you should try this at home! Sex is inherently ridiculous; it's icky and sticky and you make funny noises - often from more than one orifice at the same time. My SASSY stories are my attempt to bring some humour into humping, some fun into fucking, and some laughter into lovemaking. At the same time, I’m trying to take the shame out of shagging. Even my randy old grandmother approves... Thanks, Nan!

Book preview

Pinocchio’s Perfect Penis

A Sexy and Silly Story for You

Copyright 2013 Sassy Johns

Published by Sassy Johns at Smashwords

WARNING: This book contains content of a sexual nature.

FOR ADULTS ONLY.

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

Smashwords Edition License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to Smashwords.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

A Message from the Author:

A warning before you start: this story is ridiculous, clichéd, and contains reference to far too many fetishes to be a serious erotic story. This is a porn parody, an erotic comedy. Stop reading now if you think you might find it offensive that it contains both sex and sarcasm.

If you like this story, check out another one, Rapunzel Ravishes her Rescuer. I must warn you though; it’s quite icky in places. If you want more clichéd alliteration, but less yucky bits, then Pinocchio’s Perfect Penis is the story for you.

Go to my author page to discover what else I’ve written for you.

There are so many wonderful stories just crying out for a SASSY (Sexy and Silly Story for You) version. Make a request in your review of this story, and I might oblige you by Sassifying the story you suggest…

I’m laughing, yet getting wet, just thinking about it…

Thanks!

SASSY Johns.

(Putting the humour into humping)

Table of Contents

Pinocchio’s Perfect Penis

A Sneak Peek at Rapunzel Ravishes her Rescuer

About the Author

Also by Sassy Johns

A Message from the

Reviews for Pinocchio's Perfect Penis

[Sam Raaflaub · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Ok, so when I mention I’m in a reading rut my friend always recommends me some crazy thing to help..well, this was her latest recommendation and sadly it’s not on Kindle and I don’t have a nook to order from BN. THANKFULLY I found this gem here on Scribd, and it was hilarious? I loved all the alliteration, new words for body parts and dirty deeds, and the sarcasm of our sexist world brought in. Thanks Sassy for a really dirty, fun and fast read to get me out of a slump!