Tattered Hearts...and Mind

By Rean

A story about a young girl's struggle to change who she is to meet society's and her family's expectations of what normal is.

Akira seemingly has everything a girl could ask for...a nice house, friends, popularity, and love. The only thing she lacks in the world is smarts.

Akira also has a secret, but to prove to her family that she is "normal"...she decides to have a baby. At the revelation of her secret and her not-go-great decision making skills, conflict arises between her and her family and things spiral out of control. Unbeknownst to Akira and her family...a deeper problem still lurks under the surface that will ultimately cause a lifetime of suffering for either Akira or the family.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Rean
• Release date: Mar 11, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301687893

Book preview

Tattered Hearts…

and Mind

Written by: REAN

Tattered Hearts…and Minds

REAN

Published by Sherika Roberts at Smashwords

Copyright 2013

Discover other titles by REAN at Smashwords.com:

Innocence of the Innocent

Smashwords Edition, License Notes

Thank you for downloading this free ebook. Although this is a free book, it remains the

copyrighted property of the author, and may not be reproduced, copied and distributed for

commercial or non-commercial purposes. If you enjoyed this book, please encourage

your friends to download their own copy at Smashwords.com, where they can also

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***Dedicated to all the children who just want to be loved***

Akira

I’m going to have a baby! I’m so excited!!! First things first…how are you going to get pregnant Akira? I mean, I know how to get pregnant. Well, I know the basics…and I’ll figure out the rest later. Anyway, the most important thing I have to figure out is who the daddy’s going to be. And I’ll have to get a job…and then a house…wow…this may be little more difficult than I thought! And I’ll have to learn how to take care of a baby…but that one should be pretty easy…I mean come on…it can’t be that hard to take care of a little bitty baby. People do it all the time and they make it look pretty easy.

Okay…well, technically I do have a house…even though I don’t own it. The point is, I have a roof over my head. And I can easily get a job…but I may have to wait a year or two. Nobody hires pregnant women…I guess it’s too much trouble. No worries though, I would prefer to stay at home with the baby until he or she is old enough to go to daycare. I wonder how old babies have to be to go to daycare. I don’t know…I’ll look it up on the internet in a little while. I still have a while to figure out all of that anyway. Maybe I need to write all of this down so I don’t forget anything. I’m going to have a baby! I’m so excited!!!

Baby, come here for a minute!!! Hearing my summons, I quickly jump from my bed and run downstairs. What do you want to eat for dinner?

Spaghetti!

I was thinking we could go out and get something to eat.

Oh…well we can. I just have to tell Tianna. Can she come with us?

Maybe next time…I want to talk to you about something.

What did I do this time?

Nothing…I just need to talk to you about some things and I thought it would be best if we spent some time away from the house. Just us two…and without the kids.

Ok. Returning to my room I tell Tianna that we’re going out for dinner and that she’s welcome to go next time.

Tianna and I are best friends and have been since the day we met seven years ago. We’re like twins…all of our free time is spent together and we share all of our secrets, fears, and dreams. She’s the one person that I know that I can trust with any and everything and she’s the same way with me.

Tianna’s one of those people that when she enters a room, she instantly lightens the mood and becomes the center of attention. She’s always in good spirits, ready to fight at the drop of the hate for anyone she loves, and is loyal to the core. Most of the time when we meet people, they’re shocked that we’re even friends, because we’re total opposites…I’m the quiet type. I prefer to keep the attention off of me, but that’s kind of hard to do since we’re pretty much glued to each other. And fighting…please! I think the last time I got into any kind of fight, physical or verbal, was in elementary school! Now don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing soft about me. If it comes to it and I have to fight…it is what it is and I will go hard! But I prefer not to. I try to treat people how I want to be treated, and I try to watch my mouth to not make anyone mad or hurt their feelings. That’s just how my Mama raised me. But according to Tianna, I’m a good two shoes. Maybe I am but hey, it’s gotten me this far in life and if I must say, I have a pretty damn good life right now.

Okay girl…I’ll see you tomorrow. Call me later if ya’ll get back early. Have fun!

Okay…I’ll walk you to the door. As I close the door behind Tianna, I return to the living room and announce, I’m ready when you are.

Okay. Let’s go. We both kiss and hug the twins good-bye and tell our nanny Erica bye as well. The twins are almost two years old and I love them to death! I always thought that little kids were annoying but after the twins were born I fell in love. I’m still not too fond of other’s people’s kids, especially when they’re crying and screaming for no reason, but Amari and Amani never do that. They’re good kids…they hardly ever cry and they don’t do things like having a fit in the grocery store like other kids you see. I can honestly say that nothing they do bothers me. They’re perfect in my eyes!

So, where are we going? I ask from the passenger seat of our new truck. I’ve always fantasized about having a truck so big that I would literally have to climb in it. I think I like the fact that if you want to drive over curbs or through ditches, you can do it with a truck like this and not worry about getting stuck.

It’s a surprise. How was your day?

It was okay…nothing special…how about yours?

Work was good…no major problems but I’m glad that it’s the weekend though. I’m ready to spend time with my family!

Awww so sentimental….you’re going to make me sick. We both laugh, as I joke. So what did you want to talk about?

Let’s wait until we get to the restaurant.

Ok. I’m eager to know what the secret is. As we drive to our secret destination, I rack my brain trying to think of what I could have done or what the problem may be. I can’t think of anything out of the ordinary. I begin to drift off trying to come up with a strategy for my new plan.

We’re here.

Looking up, I didn’t even realize that I’d gotten lost in my thoughts and we’ve already arrived at my favorite restaurant. Yes! I thought I had done something wrong but now that we’ve gotten here, I guess I did something really right to get this special treatment. What’s the special occasion?

Nothing baby…I told you, I just want us to have some time alone.

We enter and the waitress leads us to our table. Typically I like to sit at the bar and eat, but she seats us in a booth by the window. I don’t like sitting by the window because it’s always too cold and I hate being cold. But, when I’m stressed or just need to think, my favorite thing to do is to just stare out of a window and watch the cars pass by wondering where they’re going. As each car passes, my stress, anger, depression, or whatever seems to just fade away. But I absolutely hate sitting by the windows in restaurants! Had I been a fortune teller, I would have known that us being seated by the window was a bad sign, but I didn’t realize it until halfway through out meal when I got those dreaded words.

So….I wanted to talk to you about…

Yeah?

Ok…this is going to be a little difficult but I don’t want you to freak out and I need you to be very open-minded, ok?

Umm ok…what is it?

I wanted to talk to you about…some changes that are going to be happening pretty soon.

Oh shit…I know this isn’t what I think it is! Please Lord don’t let this be happening! Can we wait until we get home to talk about this. I don’t think this is the best time. I say, hoping that that will stop the conversation. I look around the restaurant and make a motion to show other people are around and that such a sensitive subject shouldn’t be spoken in public.

The second sign I should’ve seen that this dinner was not going to be what I expected was that all the patrons in the restaurant seemed to be avoiding us like the plague. Everyone was either seated at the bar, that seemed to be a half a mile away from us, or at tables beside the bar…we were isolated. Not one person in the whole damn restaurant was close enough to us to hear us…even if we screamed!

No one’s sitting close enough to hear what we’re talking about. Plus, I’ve been putting this off long enough.

Shit, shit, shit….not today! My palms begin to sweat and I lift my right hand from the table to rub it on my thigh to wipe away the moisture. When I lift my hand, I see that where my hand was on the table has left a sweaty hand print. Shoo…we haven’t even started talking and my nerves are already getting bad. I’m getting more and more anxious by the minute, and my adrenaline is rushing through my body. I can feel my face burning from my blood pressure rising! Unwrapping my silverware, I take the napkin and wipe the sweat from my hands and forehead and take off my jacket. Whoo, I just got hot all of a sudden!

Oh stop being so dramatic…you don’t even know what I’m going to say.

Yes I do and if you say it, I promise, I will die right here. Please let’s wait until we get home.

No…we have to talk about this now… Dropping my head on the table: it causes a loud thud. Damn that hurt! I really didn’t mean to do it that hard, it was supposed to be just for dramatic effect, but I hit it too hard and now the damn thing is throbbing. I know, once I lift my head I’m going to have a huge knot on it…or at least a red mark. Get up! People are looking over here. Stop it right now!

Before I can lift my head, I hear the waitress say, Is everything okay? Do you need me to call 911?

No…we’re fine.

I lift my head and dramatically say, Yes! I’m dying…please call 911! I guess the bitch didn’t believe me, because she laughed at me and left saying to call her if we needed anything. I should’ve tripped her when she walked away!

I’m going to kill you…stop being dramatic! We’re going to talk about this and that’s the end of it.

Fine…

I know you’re getting older and you see things are changing…and I wanted to just tell you what’s going on.

"I know Mama…I’m going