Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893
    Ebook97 pages40 minutes

    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893

    By Various Various and F. C. (Francis Cowley) Burnand

    ()

    Read preview
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherArchive Classics
    Release dateNov 26, 2013
    Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893

    Read more from Various Various

    Related to Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893

    Related ebooks

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      A Refusal To Mourn The Deaths, By Gunfire, Of Three Men In Brooklyn

      Jan 1, 2019

      And at times, didn’t the whole countrytry to break his skin?—Tim Seibles You strike your one good match to watch its bloomand jook, a swan song just before a nightwind comes to snuff it. That’s the kind of dayit’s been. Your Black & Mild, now, useles

      7 min read

    • Article

      Roger’s PROFANISAURUS

      Aug 5, 2021

      profanisaurus@viz.co.uk aroma diffuser 1. n. A scientific device that breaks “essential oils” down into smaller molecules, dispersing them into the air for a pleasant or calming effect on the gullible. 2. n. The arsehole. Barbie’s minge sim. Somethin

      8 min read

    • Article

      1887 Vrc Derby

      Sep 30, 2021

      1887 Vrc Derby
      7 min read

    • Article

      John Ashbery

      Mar 15, 2019

      He could understand the things at home.—Wallace Stevens, “Things of August” Scribbled on the expansive mist, the desireof many dwindles to usand our “activities,” wholesomeor otherwise. Soon it becomes apparentthat neither they nor I have any prise o

      4 min read

    • Article

      Spotlight On The Black Country

      Sep 28, 2023

      “BUT LET ME SAY BEFORE IT has to go,” proclaimed Wystan Auden, “it’s the most lovely country that I know.” Which part of England was he describing? Full marks for “the Black Country”. Brought up in Solihull, on the bear-and-ragged-staff side of the s

      3 min read

    • Article

      Letter Bocks

      Nov 18, 2021

      letters@viz.co.uk ON A RECENT visit to Denmark I saw this remarkable poster inside a bus. Needless to say, I put my foot through the bus window and was hospitalised for a considerable amount of time. However, I was perfectly fine and I didn’t even ha

      13 min read

    • Article

      Tessa Castro

      Jun 1, 2022

      IN COMPETITION No 280 you were invited to write a poem called Cutting. My cue was a 19th-century Norwegian painting I’d seen of a woman cutting bread. You widened it to cutting hair and grass, being cut down to size and cutting people dead in the str

      2 min read

    • Article

      Tessa Castro

      Aug 24, 2022

      IN COMPETITION No 283 you were invited to write a poem called Things Fall Apart. Martin Brown wrote some close parody of Yeats, and when his shopping bag burst, ‘The best splat all the kitchen, while the walls / Are caught with passionfruit at veloci

      2 min read

    • Article

      Ship Of Fools

      Sep 29, 2022

      AS A SIMPLE GLANCE at most of them will tell you, there’s not a whole bunch of fun in being an opera critic — so we tend to greet the faintest prospect of joy with breathless hope. Imagine, then, the bitter gall we had to drink when the summer’s inco

      3 min read

    • Article

      Four Poems

      Sep 4, 2018

      In London. England. Who knows why?Perhaps this rumpled guyFrom central casting or a page of Dickens.He’s taking ordinary usTo haunts of the illustrious,Where even dull pulse quickens. A red felt hat’s dark fingered brim,Food-spotted vest are—him.A mo

      4 min read

    • Article

      Commonplace Book

      Sep 1, 2021

      If any question why we died, Tell them, because our fathers lied. —Rudyard Kipling, “Epitaphs of the War,” The Years Between, 1919 She consulted me, a glance, and said: “I think not anything off the wagon. It arrives too quickly. Let’s have somethi

      4 min read

    • Article

      Make A Spectacle Of Oneself

      Oct 27, 2022

      AWARE THAT QUEEN Elizabeth I said to Robert Cecil, a much greater man than I, “Little man, little man: must is not a word to be used to princes,” I am hesitant to address my new Sovereign Lord with the word “must”. But the Coronation must not be a se

      3 min read

    • Article

      Hook, Line And Sinker

      Oct 18, 2018

      Hook, Line And Sinker
      4 min read

    • Article

      DORRIES ON LORRIES (and QUARRIES)

      Jan 5, 2023

      BRITAIN’S FOURTH FAVOURITE LETTERS PAGE ABOUT LARGE ROAD VEHICLES (AND OPEN-PIT MINES) HOSTED BY THE MEMBER OF PARLIAMENT FOR MID BEDFORDSHIRE, NADINE DORRIES (by which we mean this is the fourth favourite letters page on these subjects which happens

      4 min read

    • Article

      No Man Is An Island

      Sep 15, 2017

      No Man Is An Island
      9 min read

    • Article

      Jan Morris

      Jun 15, 2018

      I have always rather envied the poet Ovid, who was banished from Rome by the emperor Augustus, you may remember, to a remote place called Tomis on the shores of the Black Sea. There he died, ten years later, and his exile has gone into legend and int

      17 min read

    • Article

      The Peasants Are Not Revolting

      Mar 13, 2024

      WE couldn’t afford to live in St John’s Wood—think of the taxi fares’ (overheard in Claridge’s). ‘Are you going home with him?’ ‘I might as well: I am pregnant, anyway’ (overheard outside a Mayfair nightclub). ‘How do you take your coffee, madam?’ ‘L

      2 min read

    • Article

      Roger’s PROFANISAURUS

      May 18, 2023

      Roger’s PROFANISAURUS
      7 min read

    • Article

      You Only Need Two Bricks

      Sep 23, 2022

      We sat in front of a blazing fire in the hearth of the tiny hunting cabin. The chimney drew well as long as the door was kept slightly open, like Lem Putt advised, to get the draft just right. We were sipping a most wonderfully aged 56-year-old Caber

      5 min read

    • Article

      My Interiors Life: Weaned On The Small Screen

      Nov 25, 2021

      FOR ME, IT WAS ALL DOWN TO what I saw on the box (which was a lot) — and this extended too to the arenas of action: a fantastic littering of such beautiful and extraordinary interiors, not one of which had I ever set foot in, nor even so much as glim

      9 min read

    • Article

      Double Trouble In Chaotic Comedy

      Nov 25, 2021

      THE ARRIVAL OF THE Christmas season is a reminder that while the West End is the beating heart of British theatre, it is in what used to be called the “provinces” — now more delicately in arts-speak the “regions” — that most of the country experience

      3 min read

    • Article

      Lost In The Dust

      Feb 3, 2020

      Lost In The Dust
      5 min read

    • Article

      A Narrow Escape

      Aug 3, 2023

      A Narrow Escape
      2 min read

    • Article

      Tessa Castro

      May 3, 2023

      IN COMPETITION No 292 you were invited to write a poem called The Walk. How good and numerous were your entries. Congratulations to those printed below, each of whom wins £25, with the bonus prize of The Chambers Dictionary going to Anthony Young. I'

      2 min read

    • Article

      In Paddy's footsteps

      Dec 14, 2022

      I wonder what Paddy Leigh Fermor would have made of it. The doyen of travel writers, a dedicated pedestrian who trudged across Europe from the Hook of Holland to Constantinople and always embraced St Augustine's creed of solvitur ambulando – it is so

      5 min read

    Reviews for Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893 - Various Various

      The Project Gutenberg eBook, Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893, by Various, Edited by Sir F. C. Burnand

      This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with

      almost no restrictions whatsoever.  You may copy it, give it away or

      re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included

      with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org

      Title: Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, November 11, 1893

      Author: Various

      Editor: Sir F. C. Burnand

      Release Date: April 10, 2012 [eBook #39420]

      Language: English

      Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1

      ***START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI, VOL. 105, NOVEMBER 11, 1893***

      E-text prepared by Malcolm Farmer, Lesley Halamek,

      and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team

      (http://www.pgdp.net)

      Punch, or the London Charivari

      Volume 105, November 11th 1893

      edited by Sir Francis Burnand

      POLICE PROTECTION FOR PIANISTS!!

      Made necessary by the antics of the Padded-roomski Devotees at St. James's hall, who rush at, try to embrace, and deck with Roses, a certain Master whenever he appears.

      A QUESTION OF TINT.

      [Who will paint London?—Daily News.]

      What a question to ask! If the colour be blue,

      A batch of our London Minervas will do:

      For each one will dye—the allusion is shocking—

      Our town and its streets with the tint of her stocking.

      Our pessimist frauds and the Ibsensite pack

      Will groan as they thickly bedaub it in black.

      Asiatic Sir Edwin, the Poet of Light,

      He will wipe out their work, and arrange it in white.

      Then the Company-gulls will arrive on the scene,

      And, presto, the colour of London is green.

      And a rare crew of Johnnies will stay out of bed

      Till the daylight appears, while they paint the town red.

      In fact—and you'll thank me for giving the hint—

      Painting London is merely a question of tint.

      Mrs. R. cannot call to mind where the original picture of "The Waterloo Blanket" is to be seen.

      THE NOBLE ORGAN-GRINDER.

      [Lord Brassey never goes on a cruise, however short, without taking with him a very costly barrel-organ. He plays on it regularly for some time every evening, as he finds it a congenial form of exercise and amusement.—The World.]

      Grinder, when serenely grinding

      On your yacht the Hundredth Psalm,

      Tell me, are you truly finding

      In this work congenial charm?

      Music hath (an old quotation)

      Charms to soothe the savage breast,

      Think how you might lull some nation

      Into dilettante rest.

      Grinder, gentle-hearted Grinder,

      Try the savage who has spurned

      Culture, for he might grow kinder,

      Soothed by barrel deftly turned.

      Matabele Lobengula

      (Accent on penultimate)

      Might be made by music, you'll a-

      gree, a model potentate.

      Orpheus like, you might so charm him

      That a mere Mashona child's

      Hand could easily disarm him

      In those equatorial wilds.

      He would cease to wear his skimpy

      Kilts that leave his legs half bare,

      He would soon disband his impi;

      Culture then would be his care.

      Suits of dittos clothe this whopper;

      Patent leather boots be got;

      You might lead him—smash, my topper!—

      Even to a chimney-pot.

      He would have a daily paper,

      Standard authors sold in parts,

      Shops of tailor, hatter, draper,

      An Academy of Arts.

      He would teach, by plays, the loyal

      Folk on marsh or fertile plain,

      Opening a Theatre Royal,

      Where they've only Reeds and Grain.

      And, till death made him a Morgue

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1