Misguided Guides Series

Welcome to the shadowy world where your cat's cuddle might just be a reconnaissance mission. Here, each purr is suspect, every gift a warning, and the innocent act of sleeping on your keyboard? A strategic move in the silent battle for dominance. This isn't just another day in your cozy, cat-dominated household—it's an insight into the cunning mind behind those whiskers. Discover the art of survival in a land where being ignored is a power play, and affection could be the prelude to an assassination attempt. With a blend of dark humor and unnerving accuracy, navigate the minefield of feline companionship where every adorable trait masks a calculated strategy for household control. Arm yourself with the knowledge to decipher the murder stares and midnight zoomies of your fluffy overlord. It's a world where paranoia meets reality, and love for your pet comes with a side of suspicion. Dive into the darkly humorous life of cohabitation with the cutest of predators, and remember: it's not paranoia if they're really out to get you.

Are you ready to LOL your way through the wild world of online dating? Join our intrepid romantic, Zoey Zero, and her AI-guided Cupid, CPUid, in a sidesplitting adventure to find love—or at least some epic stories to share with your friends. Armed with unbreakable optimism, razor-sharp wit, and a mischievous virtual wingman, our hopeless un-romantic love seeker dives headfirst into the digital dating scene: from crafting the perfect, not-so-honest dating profile, interpreting cryptic text messages from potential love interests, to escaping the friend zone. Our misguide details her online dating experiences, along with testimonials of CPUid's many desperate clients as they navigate the minefields of ghosting gaffes, emoji enigmas, and the professional dating merry-go-round. Laugh, cringe, and root for Zoey Zero as she puts her heart—and her profile—on the line. Whether you're a seasoned swiper or a digital dating newbie, you'll find yourself nodding along with Zoey's misadventures and clicking on her CPUid affiliate link to discover the art of making all the wrong moves in all the wrong places. Who needs a fairytale ending when you can have a rollicking, uproarious journey? Swipe right on this book and get ready to LOL your way to love (or something like it)!

Step right up to the therapy session of a lifetime, where your past isn't just a memory, it's a playground. This anointed guidebook into chronomanipulation offers you the once-in-an-eon chance to tweak, nudge, and outright bulldoze through those pesky regrets that have been cluttering your life. Ever thought a tiny tweak in your past could catapult you into a utopian present, or at least fix that horrendous haircut from senior prom? Under the compassionate guidance of Dr. Tamara Warp, discover the exhilarating, potentially universe-altering, but always entertaining world of therapeutic time travel. From rekindling lost loves with the finesse of a rom-com protagonist to altering career paths with the precision of a bull in a china shop, you'll embark on a journey of rediscovery, hilarity, and occasional temporal misdemeanors. But wait, there's more! Not only does this handy guide promise a whirlwind tour of your own personal "could-have-beens," it delivers a masterclass in why some things are better left in the history books. From learning how not to cause a paradox that unravels the fabric of reality to mastering the art of not freaking out when historical figures won't stick to the script, this guide has got you covered. So if you're ready to dive headfirst into the chaos of changing the past for a possibly better, potentially weirder future, Dr. Tamara Warp is here to push you off the ledge with a wink and the reassurance that what happens in the past doesn't always necessarily stay there.

Dive into the hilariously eerie world of real estate with your not-so-ordinary realtor, Cassandra "Cassie" Spectre. Ever thought a poltergeist could polish your cooking skills or a ghostly coach might just be the secret to your fitness success? Cassie Spectre's guide to finding a haunted homemate makes these spectrally intelligent scenarios a reality.. Raised in a haunted Victorian mansion and descending from a long line of mediums, Cassie left her mundane corporate finance job to embrace her true calling: matching the living with lovingly haunted homes. From the mildly haunted fixer-upper to the grandiose poltergeist palace, this guidebook explores the uncharted territory of spectral real estate with wit, wisdom, and a touch of the otherworldly. With a quiz to match your personality to the perfect type of haunting, tips on reading between the lines of real estate listings, and advice on navigating open houses with paranormal poise, Cassie provides you a roadmap to finding a home that's as unique as you are. Find out why embracing a home with a "little extra" might just be the best decision you'll ever make. Discover the unexpected joys of haunted living and learn that with the right perspective, even a home with spirits can be a dream come true.

Sleepers of the world, get rich! Ever wonder why the wealthiest fat cats always look so well-rested? It's because they've unlocked the secrets of Sleep Economics—a revolutionary technique where your road to riches is paved in sumptuous silk sheets and the only "work" required is an enthusiastic embrace of slumber. I'm Dr. Somnus "Snoozy" Slumberton, trailblazer and high priest of this lucrative moolah-making universe. From the tale of Sleeping Beauty, who awoke to a kingdom's worth of wealth, to the modern moguls who built empires in their sleep, this guide reveals how the art of dozing off can lead to financial and personal fulfillment. Together with my AI companion AIDEN, we're tossing conventional business wisdom and the idea of hard work and replacing it with a new Sleep Economy—a future of infinite cash money belonging to those unafraid of drifting off into uncharted, unconscious waters, and we're giving you the opportunity to get in on the bottom mattress—from manifesting multiple streams of REM-based income to multiple-level snoozer harvesting sanctuaries. Grab your favorite blankie, curl up in your coziest corner, and prepare to have your financial worldview turned upside down. Because in this snoozerverse, the road to riches is a slumberous one, and the only thing standing between you and untold wealth is a good night's sleep.

In a world where relationships can feel as unpredictable as an untrained puppy, Penelope Paws believes that the key to harmony lies in the pages of dog training manuals. Armed with an arsenal of treats, a leash, and an unwavering determination, Penelope sets out to prove that boyfriends and dogs aren't so different after all. Joined by her canine consultant, Mr. Snuffles—a cigar-chomping, top-hat-wearing French Bulldog with a knack for incisive commentary—Penelope embarks on a sidesplitting quest to train her boyfriends using unconventional canine techniques. From the laid-back graphic designer who's always eager to please to the stubborn sales executive who insists on being the alpha, Penelope's unorthodox methods and boundless optimism are put to the ultimate test. Will she succeed in teaching her old dogs new tricks, or will she find herself barking up the wrong tree in the pursuit of love and obedience?