In this episode, Kwame Christian, CEO of the American Negotiation Institute, shares his journey from being a people pleaser to becoming a negotiation expert. He emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and authenticity in negotiations and highlights the need to understand the emotional temperature of the room. Kwame introduces his approach called 'compassionate curiosity,' which involves acknowledging and validating emotions, asking open-ended questions with compassion, and engaging in joint problem-solving. He also discusses the power of having difficult conversations about race and other sensitive topics, and how it can bring people together and lead to collective progress. In this conversation, Kwame Christian and Tony discuss the power of empathy and compassionate curiosity in difficult conversations and negotiations. They emphasize the importance of recognizing and managing biases, building rapport, and finding common ground. Kwame shares strategies for navigating tough conversations, including gamifying the process and using affinity bias strategically. They also explore how these skills can be applied in corporate settings and the potential for collaborative negotiation to create value for all parties involved.
Keywords
negotiation, difficult conversations, emotional intelligence, self-awareness, authentic, compassionate curiosity, race, collective progress, empathy, compassionate curiosity, biases, rapport building, common ground, tough conversations, negotiation, corporate settings, collaborative negotiation
Takeaways
Self-awareness and authenticity are key in negotiations.
Understanding the emotional temperature of the room is crucial for effective communication.
Kwame's approach of 'compassionate curiosity' involves acknowledging emotions, asking open-ended questions with compassion, and engaging in joint problem-solving.
Having difficult conversations about race and other sensitive topics can lead to collective progress and bring people together. Empathy and compassionate curiosity are essential in difficult conversations and negotiations.
Recognize and manage biases to improve communication and decision-making.
Building rapport and finding common ground can lead to better understanding and collaboration.
Strategies like gamifying conversations and using affinity bias strategically can help navigate tough negotiations.
Belief in the power of collaborative negotiation is key to achieving mutually beneficial outcomes.
Power dynamics can shift, and collaborative problem-solving can lead to expanded value.
Old-style negotiation tactics may work in certain situations but can damage relationships and miss out on potential value.
Patience, restraint, and trust in the negotiation process are crucial for success.
In corporate settings, applying empathy and compassionate curiosity can lead to better outcomes and relationships.
Negotiation skills can be learned and developed through practice and continuous improvement.
Titles
Understanding the Emotional Temperature of the Room
The Role of Difficult Conversations in Collective Progress Belief and Trust in the Negotiation Process
Continuous Improvement in Negotiation Skills
Sound Bites
"I don't know what it is that I'm going to do with my career, but I know that negotiation is going to be a central part of it."
"We are using prehistoric tools to try and fight modern battles."
"Compassionate curiosity is my approach to difficult conversations."
"We are just trying to share space and understand each other and be understood."
"Biases don't make us bad, they make us human."
"I'm gonna slow down, I'm gonna understand, I'm gonna empathize, and then I'm gonna use affinity bias strategically."