In this episode, Linda Murphy joins me to discuss how to develop better communication between kids and parents. Linda is a speech language pathologist and RDI® Consultant. She co-founded Peer Projects Therapy From the Heart, a clinic in Beverly, MA dedicated to helping kids and families by using a positive, thoughtful communication style that emphasizes understanding, patience, respect, and kindness. Linda has been working with individuals with social learning differences for over 25 years.  We talk about: [3:15] How Linda got into this work [4:40] What is declarative language [10:40] What happens when a person is given a command [14:55] Different strategies for kids who are rigid thinkers [18:35] Giving kids processing time [20:50] The balance between alternative thinking vs. giving kids notice of things changing [25:30] Acknowledging the ‘communication dance’ [28:40] Strategies for modeling ‘black and white thinking’  [32:05] Voicing your moments of flexibility to help your kids [34:00] What we can do as parents to help our kids to not be afraid of making mistakes [38:55] Examples of declarative language vs. imperative language [45:00] Advice to her younger parent self   She leads trainings on the topic of social learning, has authored Declarative Language Handbook, Co-Regulation Handbook, numerous articles, and co-authored the book Social Thinking and Me with Michelle Garcia Winner. Linda lives north of Boston with her husband and their two busy lovable boys.   Resources mentioned in this episode: Free ‘How to Stop Yelling’ Course: www.sarahrosensweet.com/yelling  Join us on Patreon: www.patreon.com/peacefulparenting  Parent Workshops: https://www.declarativelanguage.com/8-week-workshops  Trainings for educators: https://www.declarativelanguage.com/trainings-for-professionals    Connect with Linda Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/declarativelanguage/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100057683280110  Blog: https://www.declarativelanguage.com/sunday-snippets-of-support  Website: https://www.declarativelanguage.com/    Connect with Sarah Rosensweet   Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarahrosensweet/  Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/peacefulparentingfreegroup Website: https://www.sarahrosensweet.com  Book a short consult or coaching session call: https://book-with-sarah-rosensweet.as.me/schedule.php