Thinking Out Loud

By Kayla Ackelson

"In ‘Thinking Out Loud,’ readers are invited into a deeply personal journey through a collection of raw and unfiltered journal entries. These intimate reflections delve into the turbulent landscape of mental health, navigating the highs and lows with honesty and humor. Amidst the raw vulnerability, there emerges a beacon of hope—a testament to the resilience of the human spirit. Each entry serves as a reminder that even in the darkest moments, there is light to be found. Through shared experiences and profound insights, this collection not only offers comfort but also empowers readers on their own paths toward healing and resilience."

• Language: English
• Publisher: Archway Publishing
• Release date: Apr 15, 2024
• ISBN: 9781665757652

Kayla Ackelson

Kayla Ackelson-Mannato is an artist and creator. She is an advocate for mental health awareness, drawing from her own journey through self-discovery. 'Thinking Out Loud' is her debut work, born from a desire to offer a sense of community and understanding to those navigating similar paths. When she's not writing, Kayla enjoys painting, exploring nature, and spending time with her family.

Book preview

THINKING

OUT LOUD

KAYLA ACKELSON

For my boys - who inspire me daily.

I remember being able to feel my pulse in my whole body and I would start to go into a panic. I started worrying about a lot of small things and it quickly turned into a constant fear of my own thoughts. I didn’t trust myself. I thought I’m absolutely losing my mind.

I wasn’t sleeping, I cried every single day for years, I was self-sabotaging, I was worrying myself into nausea, and I had so much brain fog I couldn’t answer simple questions. I was pushing my partner away because I thought it would protect him. I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning because I would think what’s the point? If I’m awake I’ll just have more terrible thoughts and do something horrible. I was late to work because I couldn’t get in my car to leave the house. Once I finally got to work, I would have to step away from my desk frequently to calm myself down from panic attacks while I was in public.

It felt like I was underwater. Hours would pass by and I would have been thinking the same thought for an entire day and spiraling.

I would drive home and pinch my arm and pull the hair out on my head. I wanted to quit. I stopped creating. I wanted to run away.

I tried acupuncture, therapy, essential oils, supplements, reiki, reflexology, tapping, quitting caffeine, quitting alcohol, yoga, different diets, going on an antidepressant, tinctures, going