The Premarital Counseling Guide

By O Randall Jenkins DEdMin

Marriage includes everything a man and a woman desire in life: love, hope, thrills, security, peace, comfort, family, rest, and joy. The conversations they have prior to marriage are vital to their future success and perseverance through the hard seasons of life. The Premarital Counseling Guide offers the counselor a comprehensive starting point for the couple to begin candid conversations to help them establish a strong foundation to build their marriage. Ministers, counselors, and officiants will benefit from this small volume as a resource.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Apr 11, 2024
• ISBN: 9798385019953

O Randall Jenkins DEdMin

Randall is a husband, father, and grandfather. He has served churches in Mississippi, Louisiana, Georgia, and Florida. He is a graduate of Hinds Community College (AA), University of Southern Mississippi (BS), and New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary (MRE, DEdMin). For over 35 years he has offered premarital counseling for couples preparing for their grand adventure. Dr. Jenkins has authored two previous books: The Punctuated Believer, The Genesis 2 Man. He and his wife of 36 years live in Florida, encouraging couples and families to invest in marriage and build a legacy of love that endures for generations. More information is at www.TwoTwentyfive.net.

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Copyright © 2024 O Randall Jenkins, DEdMin.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

WestBow Press

A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan

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Bloomington, IN 47403

www.westbowpress.com

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

ISBN: 979-8-3850-1994-6 (sc)

ISBN: 979-8-3850-1995-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2024904042

WestBow Press rev. date: 02/28/2024

CONTENTS

Introduction

Chapter 1 Love Defined

Chapter 2 Heart, Soul, Mind, Strength

Chapter 3 The Six

Commitment

Communication

Intimacy

Finances

Faith

Family

Chapter 4 Additional Conversations

Conflict Resolution

Career

Friends

Vacation time

Holidays/Travel

Community Involvement

Education/Professional Training

Social Views

Personal Health (Staying Healthy)

Will/s

Retirement plans

Hobbies and Interests

Political views

Insurance

Chapter 5 Resources For Counselors

Chapter 6 Resources for Couples

Wedding Information

Premarital Counseling Quick Reference

INTRODUCTION

Premarital counseling serves couples, families, and communities. Building a foundation for marriage takes hard work and sacrifice from the couple and those who help prepare them for the adventurous journey ahead. Both the couple and counselor must find a way to break through the quiet and superficial to engage in conversations of the heart. Things that matter the most. Therefore, the couple and counselor share the responsibility of assuring the investment of time is productive in building a foundation of trust ready for building a lifelong relationship.

You as a counselor, life coach, or consultant have invested time and energy in building a storehouse of knowledge and resources to better serve others through the use of best practices. This premarital counseling guide compiles best practices from numerous sources you know and trust, some timeless principles as well. Additional space is included for your notes and insight. Exposing each couple to wise counsel from a variety of complementing sources highlights the importance of supporting agencies, whether state or church sponsored, who agree preparing for marriage builds a foundation for a truly successful marriage and stronger family unit.

The Florida Constitution contains elements of faith and most legal documents in local or county agencies include the importance of spiritual counsel to couples and families. Because the State, Church, and most faith organizations desire successful marriages, some terminology and phrases carry similar meaning. Counselors with a faith foundation will readily recognize biblical parallels and doctrine and adapt conversation to such. Not every state has the same regulations or expectations. Counselors may find encouragement once they read of their state’s desire to have and support successful marriages and families.

This guide is unique to the counseling and ministry profession, combining best practices that speak to the success of marriage. Secular, religious, and cultural issues rarely change the primary motivation for marrying, love. This premarital counseling guide is a resource for biblical doctrine while allowing ministers in all denominations to have confidence in its relevance to all marriages without being critical of church traditions.

Each topic discussion includes four characteristics of love compelling a couple to marry: heart, soul, mind, and strength. Heart, soul, mind, and strength are defined within the context and counseling practice of TwoTwentyfive Inc., a faith-based ministry for couples, families, and communities of faith. The priority of TwoTwentyfive is providing resources and partnering with couples, families, communities of faith, churches, counselors, and pro-family groups to build strong and successful families and marriages who provide a positive impact on others. TwoTwentyfive adapts heart, soul, mind, and strength to love languages made popular by Gary Chapman: action, touch, time, verbal, gift. Common secular phrases: I love you with all of my heart, soul mates, we think alike, and I would do anything for her, adapt well to counseling and parallel the supreme love God requires of those who would love Him (with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength) and to the love languages of God throughout the balance of Scripture.

CHAPTER 1

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Love Defined