Clues

By skye Summers

Skye who was forty and recovering from major depression decided she would place her life in the hands of fate by standing thumbs pointed in front of her and her past behind her. She experiences hardships and happiness as she describes survival in Australia on the road with little. Witness Skye's struggles to possess enough Cannabis to mask her depression.  Skye travelled from WA to Cairns and back down to NSW making many new friends in an attempt to find a peaceful paradise and personally satisfying lifestyle. She lived from a tent to a mansion exactly a hundred places till she found everything she was looking for.

• Language: English
• Publisher: skye Summers
• Release date: Mar 12, 2024
• ISBN: 9798224000616

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Table of Contents

Clues

CLUES

I went to university at forty for therapy more than anything else. It did wonders for my self-esteem.  I was unexpectedly, successful!  After one semester I developed a passion for writing. My lecturer suggested I could just sit and make up stories or I could just go out and live the story and write it all down. I chose the latter and hit the road with a backpack and only $50. I kept a journal for ten years. this is it.

Skye who was forty and recovering from major depression decided she would place her life in the hands of fate by standing thumbs pointed in front of her and her past behind her. She experiences hardships and happiness as she describes survival in Australia on the road with little. Witness Skye's struggles to possess enough Cannabis to mask her depression.  Skye travelled from WA to Cairns and back down to NSW making many new friends in an attempt to find a peaceful paradise and personally satisfying lifestyle. She lived from a tent to a mansion exactly a hundred places till she found everything she was looking for.

See if you can spot the clues,

.

––––––––

In search of a new life,

CLUES

I embarked on a once-in-a-lifetime journey, hitchhiking from Perth with the intention of crossing the Nullarbor Plain and continuing up to Cairns. Along the way, I made a stop to see my mom in Coolgardie and hopefully find some work.

It didn't take me long to find work.  I got a job at the roadhouse only two minutes walk away. my bosses were a family of six, related in various ways, and that's where the similarity ended. I liked the mother, Paula, She was a good worker, unlike most of the family who abused their I'm the boss" role. I was surprised to learn I had worked with Paula at Chamberlains Tractor Co. in Perth at the time of my divorce and nervous breakdown. I could not remember her, like a lot of other things I had forgotten because of the shock treatment forced on me when I was depressed.

On entering work every morning I was met by red-eyed, red-nosed, sick staff all at various stages of the flu. I felt like walking straight back out again. I accepted the inevitable and the dreaded symptoms occurred on my eighth day of employment.

In the kitchen, the main topic of conversation was about whoever was not present at that particular time. I found backstabbing very offensive so did not want to join in the conversations. No one else seems to notice. She threw out the vegetables that I cooked last night commented the night cook, referring to the day cook. Yes she's getting very slack lately added Paula. Fire her suggested Shirley, {Paula's daughter.} Can't you tell who's not here? said one of the waitresses. Yeah It's her day off, thank God. 'I think we should chain her to the sink Yeah, she's always interfering in other people's work agreed the other waitresses. Did you see Lyn's dress! Yeah, she never irons anything." And so it went on nonstop.

I wondered what they said about me when I wasn't there. Probably called me `a snotty bitch` as I did not talk much. I'd never worked with a group before. I'd always preferred to work alone because of the work satisfaction gained by solitary completion. After two weeks I gratefully retired from there due to the flu and the bitching which was harder to handle than the work plus the low $200 payment I received for a week's wages did not motivate me to stay on.

On reflection, I realised I was a bit hard on the girls and their backbiting. I recall going to a barbecue with Mum and Pop, and the company consisted of seven married women. Again I was exposed to women talking together and the conversation did lean towards talking about people, and gossip, but I guess there's not much else they have in common to talk about in their little world of husbands, wives, and children stuck in the outback

I fantasized about getting them all stoned and then discovering what they're all made of underneath and who they really are under the masks that they wear. The masks that say accept me, like me, I'm a nice person. They laugh too easily, needing to laugh.

It's a hard existence living in a small country town, of about 800 people, where everybody knows everybody, where your life hangs out like your washing for everyone to see.  My Mum was popular, that's because she's friendly and caring, people like that in a person's character. I try to be, but I come across as silent and aloof as I find it hard to contribute to their conversion. not projecting the witty image I'd like them to see. Mum is good at talking, motor mouth, Pop says, she can talk to anybody.

I had a yearning to go to Cairns in the tropics.  I'd seen pictures of beautiful beaches and palm trees. After a few weeks in Coolgardie, I met a truckie who offered to take me to Adelaide and he said he could get me a direct ride to Queensland from there. He said he would come to see me the following week to see If I was ready to leave.

I was ready to travel as I needed to get away to explore and find peace within myself. I was healing the wounds of the past by getting a new life, far removed from the old one. I was off to write a story, a story of my life, as it happens. I'd been married with two kids. they had all left home and I was on my own. I'd never been travelling on my own. They say life begins at forty, I'm forty and I was ready for life to begin!

I watched Flashdance on video - twice. I really enjoyed it. How is it I seem to be able to relate to every story I read or film I watch? This time, as I watched her dance, I wondered why I didn't pursue dancing. When I was a child dancing was my life, I gained a high I've never reached in any other way, a calm peaceful high, not the unsettling paranoid high obtained from pot but inner happiness as my body moved with the music, the challenge, persisting until a step was perfected.

I still loved dancing, but it was too late for me. Forty seemed so very old. It's frightening to know that, and hard to accept. I procrastinate. I want to do things, but I don't get around to doing them. I wanted to paint but didn't get it together to take lessons. I felt I had talent, I was creative but I needed to learn basic skills.

I never did have the patience to stay at anything long, no matter how interested I was. In drama too, I felt I could act, but I never tried to get anywhere only in amateur theatres when I was young. I didn't bother to learn techniques, but now It's too late. Too late to dance, paint or act, all my dreams of being talented, being somebody, and achieving something, are gone. I guess I'm a failure.

I started my journey feeling depressed and very sorry for myself. I never gave myself the chance. I just couldn't get it together. Now I've dropped out of university. I couldn't stick with that either. I bought some terra-cotta clay once, and I made lots of things out of it, mostly heads, but I never reached the PERFECTION I wanted, I always broke it up and started again. Finally, I ended up with nothing. Rather than imperfection. I guess that's what's wrong with my life, I'm looking for perfection and it doesn't exist. I wish I could accept all that I have with all its limitations, instead of chasing dreams. Maybe as a writer, I might succeed in finishing something.

I was beginning to get more depressed. Before I start my travels. I thought I'd see what Kalgoorlie was like. It too was a gold mining town but had a population of over 30.000 but it was over 40 km away.

Mum and Pop went to Kalgoorlie to play bingo so dropped me off at the most popular Hotel The Tower. because Ted Egan was doing a one-man Folk night. That appealed to me.

I was quite excited when I entered The Tower. Everyone was silently listening to Ted perform his old bush ballads accompanied by only a beer carton, on which he tapped out the rhythm.

I  struck up a conversation with a couple at the bar ,  Jan and John. I found I had a lot in common with Jan. when she found out I was on my own she invited me to join them. Ironically, she looked like me, same features. She could have been my sister. We soon got bored with sitting listening so they suggested we went to the other bar for a chat and a dance. I eagerly agreed.

While Jan and John danced, I was chatting with two guys at the bar. They invited me to a party afterwards. "I'm Ted Egan's son, Mark, this is Alan, he's putting us up tonight. He went on to tell me they had driven down from Alice Springs and they were on their way to a Folk Festival.  As he spoke I felt very attracted to him, he had deep blue eyes that smiled as he spoke. I asked if it was alright for my friends to come too. `Sure` said Mark, and they came over to our table to join us.

That was a mistake, as soon as Jan was introduced to him, she never took her attention off him. He felt over my knee and gave my hand a reassuring squeeze, and held it there, but not for long. Jan worked well on him and in the car, on the way to the party, she firmly sat in first beside him and me beside her. Her friend had to sit in the front.

The party was interesting, a couple of singers did their thing, and I sat in the lounge and chatted to whoever happened to be around. My eyes resentfully watched Jan and Mark who never left the kitchen, fondly giggling, and generally enjoying each other. My heart tore apart with jealousy, but a smile never left my face.

I was wondering where I was going to crash as everyone drifted off when Marks's friend, Alan sat down beside me and very unromantically said, You can sleep in my bed, Mark and Jan are sleeping on the lounge. I asked if it was OK if I slept on the sofa as it was 40kms to Coolgardie, and I had no way of getting back home. Earlier when Mum came to pick me up at the Tower, Jan said: Let her stay, she can sleep at my place.

Alan got angry with me for rejecting him and I got very upset as he went on, Look, Mark's my mate and he wants to get it on with this chick, so that's your choice, me or- " he pointed to the door. Tears came to my eyes. I was told in no uncertain terms - sleep with me or get out. I had to leave and try and regain some dignity. I rushed to the door sobbing and went outside into the darkness. It was two o'clock in the morning. To make things worse it was pouring in rain.

The rain mixed with the tears pouring down my face. I found a phone box around the corner, went in to get out of the rain, and dried my eyes. Suddenly the phone box door opened. It was another guest who was at the party.

That was a lousy thing to do mate, he sympathized. you're not going anywhere in this weather, look, get in the car and we'll sort something out. I let myself be led to the car. He then went on to explain that Jan wanted a lift home, she had