Orange You Glad I Said Kiss

By David Connor

Sex is easy to come by for Eli. His friend with benefits, Casey, is always ready, willing, and oh so very able. With a certain February holiday approaching, Eli has a pang in his heart for more, though.

The week of Valentine’s Day, it seems as if things are about to change. Poetry and sweet nothings abound, but the one they come from is a bit of shock. By the time February 14th arrives, Eli finds himself with more than one suitor, a possible marriage proposal, and a big decision to make.

Who will Eli choose, and how will he deal with rejecting someone and breaking their heart?

• Language: English
• Publisher: JMS Books LLC
• Release date: Apr 25, 2022
• ISBN: 9781685501464

Book preview

Orange You Glad I Said Kiss

By David Connor

Published by JMS Books LLC at Smashwords

Visit jms-books.com for more information.

Copyright 2022 David Connor

ISBN 9781685501464

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Cover Design: Written Ink Designs | written-ink.com

Image(s) used under a Standard Royalty-Free License.

All rights reserved.

WARNING: This book is not transferable. It is for your own personal use. If it is sold, shared, or given away, it is an infringement of the copyright of this work and violators will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

No portion of this book may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, without permission in writing from the publisher, with the exception of brief excerpts used for the purposes of review.

This book is for ADULT AUDIENCES ONLY. It may contain sexually explicit scenes and graphic language which might be considered offensive by some readers. Please store your files where they cannot be accessed by minors.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are solely the product of the author’s imagination and/or are used fictitiously, though reference may be made to actual historical events or existing locations. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Published in the United States of America.

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To fate!

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Orange You Glad I Said Kiss

By David Connor

Chapter 1

"Banana…

"Ba-na-na…

Baaaaa-naaaa-na…

Elijah Wentworth held one up for Eddie, the chimpanzee. Banana. He said it half a dozen more times—banana, banana, banana—signing it each time by holding up his index finger and peeling it with his other hand. Banana, Eddie. Ba-na-na. Ba-na-na. Ba-na-na.

Nothing.

Eli sighed. Three hours in on his first day, Eddie wasn’t doing terribly well at the task at hand—or maybe Eli wasn’t. He opened his satchel for a midmorning snack. Knock, knock, he said. Who’s there? Orange. Eli held it up. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?

The chimp actually grinned. He started jumping up and down, reached out.

Want some? Eli asked.

Eddie the chimp made his move. He didn’t want some; he wanted the whole thing. And he took it.

As Eddie sat there devouring Eli’s morning dose of vitamin C—who knew chimpanzees liked oranges?—Eli decided from that day forward, he’d always carry a spare.

He’d nicknamed Eddie Eddie Orange by day three, because of how excited the primate got whenever he saw one, and also because the furry dude seemed so human he needed a surname. By day twenty-five, a Friday, Eli grew sad as he watched Eddie peel his twenty-fifth orange. The next week together would be their last. Eli Wentworth was going to miss Eddie Orange.

Eli came from money. He could live off his trust fund forever with good investments. At age thirty-four, he hardly ever dipped into it, though. He’d rather work. Granted, both his dwelling and his wheels were supplied by the Wentworth family business, as was a credit card. He wasn’t really living by his own means, but he felt like he was—sometimes. Those oranges he bought every morning for himself and Eddie, he paid cold hard cash for them, the kind earned from teaching chimpanzees sign language at Fleckman, Underhill, Cooper, and Ushinger Laboratories, or some other interesting vocation. Eli had been a waiter, a mailman, a nude model for an art class, a hospital aide, and a convenience store clerk, all in an effort to put himself in social settings he might not otherwise experience.

Eli’d first learned to sign at age eight, just because rich kids got to sign up for anything they wanted. He stuck with it, became fluent