Stroke: The Best Thing That Happened

By Bill Gasiamis

In this book, Bill Gasiamis shares the tools that he and 9 other stroke survivors unknowingly had in common that helped them reach a point in their recovery where they were able to say that stroke was the best thing that happened to them and, despite the deficits they live with, how stroke transformed their lives for the better.

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• Language: English
• Publisher: Recovery After Stroke Pty Ltd
• Release date: Nov 3, 2023
• ISBN: 9780645919110

Book preview

Stroke: The unexpected way that a stroke became the best thing that happened © Bill Gasiamis

www.recoveryafterstroke.com

The moral rights of Bill Gasiamis to be identified as the author of this work have been asserted in accordance with the Copyright Act 1968

First published in Australia 2023 by Recovery After Stroke Pty Ltd

ISBN 978-0-6459191-0-3

eISBN 978-0-6459191-1-0

Any opinions expressed in this work are exclusively those of the author and are not necessarily the views held or endorsed by Recovery After Stroke Pty Ltd

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted by any means, electronic, photocopying or otherwise, without prior written permission of the author.

Disclaimer

All the information, techniques, skills, and concepts contained within this publication are of the nature of general comment only and are not in any way recommended as individual advice. The intent is to offer a variety of information to provide a wider range of choices now and in the future, recognising that we all have widely diverse circumstances and viewpoints. Should any reader choose to make use of the information herein, this is their decision, and the author and publisher/s do not assume any responsibilities whatsoever under any conditions or circumstances. The author does not take responsibility for the business, financial, personal or other success, results or fulfilment upon the readers’ decision to use this information. It is recommended that the reader obtain their own independent advice.

Dedicated to…

To all the stroke survivors

who are dealing with the aftermath

of stroke and despite it all

are seeking transformation and growth

and

To my family,

I hope that overall that I have set a good example.

Foreword

This book will likely change your life.

What an honour it is to be given the chance to write the foreword for Bill’s book. I was lucky to cross paths with Bill in 2013, when we both attended an NLP course in Melbourne.

We were both there to seek personal development, but with Bill, there was a deeper meaning and purpose in how he was looking to apply what he learned. Bill had only recently suffered his second brain haemorrhage, but that wasn’t stopping him from throwing himself wholeheartedly into the course content and engaging fully with the other participants.

It’s easy to recall the early days with Bill because a few significant things stood out about him.

1. He had this insatiable desire to improve who he was as a person. He wanted to be a better version of himself, to provide better outcomes to those he loved and cared about.

2. He had this strong purpose to help people burdened with the impact of stroke, both the patient and the carer, stressing there was no support or information available for his wife and family to deal with their situation.

3. His zest for life was inspiring, especially after what he had just been through.

Ten years have passed, and the amazing thing is that not much has changed in his mindset, but the actions, outputs, and impact he has realised is truly astonishing. Bill is the ultimate example of making your purpose come to life, and the perseverance to make it happen is just as impressive.

Over these last 10 years, I had the pleasure of seeing his vision take shape through many phone calls or catch-ups. When the conversation turned to stroke initiatives, I would click into marketing mode and deliver so much content Bill would be overloaded within minutes. His usual reply was, Wow, that sounds amazing, but I’m not sure I understood 10% of it. He would remind me that his brain wasn’t working as fast as it used to.

The funny thing was, after a month or so, we would reconnect, and some of the things we discussed were already implemented—he wasn’t just able to take the new information on board immediately. He took his time and implemented it gradually, at a pace that allowed him to understand it and make sure it all connected to his greater plan.

We still laugh at one of our first conversations where Bill was convinced that he might be able to reach some of the people in his suburb and surroundings with his support tools and maybe some coaching. He looked confused when I suggested that he probably had a bigger audience that could use his help and guidance. Then we talked about the internet and the world as his market. Always humble, Bill questioned whether people overseas would want help from me.

Fast forward to today, Bill has an amazing podcast, website, and coaching program, where his truly global audience is within reach. Now, this book shares his most important lessons from his own experiences, along with those who also found stroke to be life-changing for the better.

You are reading this book because, somehow, you came across Bill Gasiamis and his incredible drive to help other stroke survivors and their carers. He says that stroke is the best thing that ever happened to him. I say meeting Bill Gasiamis is one of the best things that ever happened to me. Inspiring, compassionate, and one of my best friends.

Go well, Bill. I am so proud of all you have already achieved and so grateful to be your mate.

Michael Wilkinson

Preface

Ibegan the Recovery After Stroke podcast in 2015 to connect with other stroke survivors with the hope of learning from them and creating a community of sorts. At the time, I did not want to burden my family, and especially my wife, Christine, with the need to constantly talk about the personal impact that three brain haemorrhages and brain surgery had on my mental and emotional well-being.

One day, around three years into my podcasting journey—and to my complete surprise—I noticed myself sharing that I felt like stroke was the best thing that happened to me. Then, to my total amazement, some of my guests said the same thing about their experience with stroke.

At around this time, one of my greatest teachers, a man called Marvin Oka, was running a behavioural modelling course. His aim was to make our group of about 10 competent in the skill of capturing and replicating the talent and expertise of high-performing individuals. Our goal was to develop a customised neuro-competency profile and gain a thorough understanding of their behaviour.

Although I did not know what to expect, I always tried to attend Marvin’s courses because I’ll learn something new. Plus, the people who attend his courses are amazing in their own right. Spending a few weeks with a room full of his students has led to valuable connections and friendships that have lasted a lifetime.

______________

As I head to the venue on the first day of the course, the roads are pleasantly quiet. It’s 8.30am on a Saturday morning in the outer suburbs of Melbourne, and there’s barely any traffic. On this cool autumn day, most people are probably curled up in bed, enjoying a few extra hours of sleep.

Unlike most people, I’m thrilled to be up and about early. I plan to arrive well in advance. The venue is situated off the main road and requires taking a sharp left turn onto a steep, unpaved dirt road that leads to a bush park. The park is surrounded by native Australian trees and wildlife, and the course classroom reminds me of the ones I used to sit in as a young child, during my school days.

I park my car, step out, and make my way to the classroom. There, I exchange greetings with a few unfamiliar faces as well as some familiar ones. Before long, we take our seats in a U-shaped arrangement. All the attendees are facing each other. Marvin is positioned at the front of the classroom, at the opening of the U, standing in front of the white-board. We go around the room and introduce ourselves, sharing a little about what we hope to get out of the course.

When it is my turn to introduce myself, I share a brief history of my stroke and how I came to start the podcast. I mention how, during my conversations with podcast guests, I found myself saying that my strokes and brain surgery were some of the best things that ever happened to me. This had led me to wonder if there was a way to help others who may not be able to say the same thing: to help others work towards that positive outcome as a goal.

As the day progresses, many of the other participants show excitement for my project, which is encouraging to hear. The idea had passed the first test of being embraced by others.

Later, I also talk to the group about how I need to find more people who share the view that stroke survivors can arrive at a positive mindset about their experience. Someone suggests that I reach out to the followers of my Instagram page, @recoveryafterstroke, and make a video. I can ask people to share their thoughts about whether stroke was the best thing that ever happened to them too. I was sceptical at first, there probably won’t be anyone out there like me I thought.

______________

But there was!

Strangers from faraway lands, different cultural backgrounds, different ages, different beliefs, and different upbringings from me were all saying they too believed deeply that stroke is the best thing that happened to them. Some of them believed it much more than I did.

I was not convinced yet.

Can we talk?

Can we Zoom?

Can I interview you?

I set to work with my interviews.

I was so excited; I had so many questions for them. The first few interviews went well, though I did not really know what I was looking for. There was lots of information about how they got to that place, and I noticed some similarities to my story. It was not obvious, but after a few more interviews, a pattern started to emerge.

I found that although each stroke survivor had a unique path arriving at this positive mindset, they almost all unknowingly attended to the same 10 things that I had attended to, while pursuing a full recovery. These 10 things were major contributors to why stroke became the best thing that ever happened to them.

It took some time to work out what to do with the information that emerged from the interviews. Are people who cannot say that stroke is the best thing that happened to them thinking about their stroke differently—and if they are, how?

By talking to them, I discovered that some were focusing on only a few of the 10 things identified in the initial interviews, while neglecting others. Some survivors had a completely different approach to dealing with their stroke, and unfortunately, there were no positive experiences to draw from it at all.

If you’re someone who is struggling to find anything positive after a stroke, then this book was written with you in mind. As you read through the following pages, I hope to offer something that can change your perspective. Even though you may be living with the deficits and the damage that the stroke has caused, my goal is to help you find at least one positive thing that can be a catalyst to a recovery that exceeds your expectations.

This book attempts to organise the 10 most common things people did which led them to say stroke was the best thing that happened to them. I did it in a way that is easy to consume and understand, and most importantly, gives you a well-illuminated path that you can follow. I hope to help you arrive at the same place in your recovery journey.

A blood vessel leaked into my brain three times over a two-year period. This resulted in surgery to remove the faulty blood vessel. Because of the medical issues, I spent a lot of time alone either in the hospital or at home. This time made me hungry for tools and information to speed up my recovery.

In 2012, information on stroke recovery and supporting the healing of your brain was hard to come by. The book you are reading now was the one I was looking for, but could not find, at the time.

Sitting on my backside for extended periods of time to write a book has not been easy. It even triggered some of the tough times—when I had no choice but to remain seated all day because fatigue made normal life impossible, where, because of my deficits, I could not even finish a two-sentence email.

However, getting that stuff out of my head and onto a page has expelled some of those traumas from wherever they were stored in my body. That has given me an appreciation of what post-traumatic growth must be all about. And the entire time, I thought, I was writing this for you.

My deepest wish for you is that you read the pages of this book with an open heart and an accepting mind. I challenge you to suspend those beliefs that may be limiting and getting in the way of your recovery (you know the ones) for at least the duration of this read.

Allow yourself to try something different and get excited about concepts that you previously thought ridiculous.

My best wishes,

Bill

Table of Contents

Foreword

Preface

Introduction

Chapter 1: A Stroke Recovery Mindset

Chapter 2: The Heart-Brain

Chapter 3: The Gut-Brain

Chapter 4: Rewiring The Brain

Chapter 5: Sleep

Chapter 6: Foods for Thought

Chapter 7: Let’s Get Physical

Chapter 8: Living Heartfully

Chapter 9: Building A Supportive Community

Chapter 10: Stumbling Into Purpose

Conclusion

Web References

Resources

Acknowledgements

Podcast

Work With Bill

About The Author

Nothing is obvious to the uninformed.

Unknown

Introduction

On the first Friday of February in 2012, the weather forecast promised a sunny high of 27C: a perfect day for outdoor work. February is the last month of the Australian summer, a bittersweet time for me. I love the warmth of summer—the hotter the better in my mind—but the season’s days were numbered.

In summer, waking in the mornings is easy. I begin to stir, and with my eyes half open, I stretch myself out while still laying down; then I quickly flip the sheets off my body with enough flips to uncover me at once, but not enough to wake my wife, Christine. Then I sit up, flip my legs to the left, which is my side of the bed, place them both on the ground, and go about my day.

That February day, however, I noticed that my big left toe felt strange.

Hmm, I thought to myself. Nonetheless, I stood up and proceeded through the rest of my morning routine. Just before I flew out the door, I put on my socks and boots, jumped in my car, and set off for work as a self-employed painting contractor.

That day and the next, I did not give the numbness a second thought.