The Ice Cream Crone: Royal Pains, #5

By Roberta Olsen Major

Prince Benno of Belleflower is stuck at boarding school, dreading several more long months of ice-encrusted boredom. He decides a visit to the local king and queen might be just the thing to cheer him up--unless, of course, the stories of the mythical ice dragon of Kinkach are true…

• Language: English
• Publisher: Wings ePress, Inc.
• Release date: Aug 7, 2023
• ISBN: 9781597052214

Book preview

What They Are Saying About

The Royal Pains Series:

...a galloping romp of hilarity on a quest of pure enjoyment. Roberta Olsen Major delights her readers with wit, puns, and good old silliness... filled with the perfect combination of chivalry and joviality... Life, love and the pursuit of laughter reign...

—Joyce Handzo,

In the Library Reviews,

October 10, 2003

...takes ‘happily ever after’ a hop, skip and a jump farther, leading the child in us all on a merry romp through ‘what if’.

—Pam Ripling,

author of Locker Shock!

Royal Pains: Book Five

The Ice Cream Crone

Roberta Olsen Major

A Wings ePress, Inc.

Young Adult Fantasy Novel

Edited by: Lorraine Stephens

Copy Edited by: Leslie Hodges

Senior Editor: Robbin Major

Executive Editor: Lorraine Stephens

Cover Artist: Pam Ripling

All rights reserved

NAMES, CHARACTERS AND incidents depicted in this book are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and beyond the intent of the author or the publisher.

No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

Wings ePress Books

Copyright © 2007 by Roberta Olsen Major

ISBN:  978-1-59705-221-4

Published In the United States Of America

Wings ePress Inc.

3000 N. Rock Road

Newton, KS  67114

Dedication

For the ladies of Book Club:

especially Carolyn, Jennifer, Linda and Marianne,

and for

Alyssa: a most faithful reader of the Royal Pains series,

who wrote to ask when there was going to be another one.

One

Ilooked up from the heavy, dusty book opened on the table before me. My eyes felt as glazed as a holiday ham. My brown hair stood in spikes, having been tugged, tousled, and tormented during the course of morning tutorials. I was accounted a right smart one back home, but nowadays felt dumb as a stump.

I shot a wistful look at the library window, but it was gray with sleet. Kinkach was an excellent place for a boarding school. Winter was seven months long, leaving nothing for the pupils of Faithful Fathers of Kinkach Prep to do but study. With a sigh, I buried my head in the weighty text, and my fingers in the rumpled hairs of my head, then proceeded to read about the mythical ice dragon of Kinkach until my eyes were painfully crossed.

If only it were history. Or languages. Or mathematics.

But no, Father Fidelis found my education shamefully light in mythology and was determined to correct almost two decades of neglect in one year of intensive study.

Prince Benno, a voice whispered at my elbow.

I jumped.

The nattily dressed dwarf gave a hugely overblown bow that caused his festooned cap to slide off his head. Your Highness has a visitor, Pestle said as he caught his cap and plopped it back on his glossy brown ringlets. Father Fidelis says you may withdraw to the common room.

I slammed the book shut. Enough about ice dragons! A cloud of dust rose, then settled on its gnawed cover. Who is it, Pestle?

It is not for me to say, Prince Benno, the Pest said primly, though his eyes were bright with curiosity and his nose practically twitched above his pomaded and braided whiskers. But one might venture to say the aforementioned visitor looks as glum as you do.

I hurried along the chilly stone corridor toward the common room, my blue robe billowing around me, the tail of my scholar’s cap flapping like an oversized ear. Who could have come to see me? I didn’t know anybody in all of Kinkach except the Faithful Fathers and the other prep students, and my own Kingdom of Belleflower was too far away for a visitor from home.

The Pest, always underfoot when I least wanted him there, dashed ahead and flung open the massive common room door, bowing obsequiously as I passed him.

The annoyed shape of my mouth shifted into a grin, the first in weeks. Adriano!

Prince Adriano, eldest son of King Arpeggio of the Kingdom of Belleflower, looked up from the fire he was contemplating with some moroseness, and mustered a smile. Benno, look at you. They’ve managed to turn you into a scholar already.

I crossed over to him, giving him a brotherly punch to the arm. They can dress me like one, I said, suddenly cheerful, but they can’t do much about what goes on between the ears.

What? You mean to tell me Prince Benno of Belleflower isn’t the star student of Faithful Fathers of Kinkach? Adriano’s smile widened, but it didn’t quite lift the aura of gloom that encircled his head like a rather dismal crown.

I snorted. What about you, Adriano? Have you come to invite me to the wedding? I know you must have swept Princess Crystal right off her feet, charming future monarch that you are.

Adriano hung his handsome head and let loose with a sigh. Princess Crystal chose to flee Placidity rather than become betrothed to me.

I laughed. Very funny, Adriano.

No, I mean it. Adriano lifted mournful eyes. She ran away from the ball—

Leaving a slipper behind for you to find, I guessed. You found it, slipped it on her dainty foot, she fell in love with your dashing good looks, and promptly agreed to marry you. I punched Adriano’s arm again. And in no time at all, you’ll be the future king of both Placidity and Belleflower, you lucky hound.

Adriano shook his head, one glossy dark curl tumbling over his classic brow. My dashing good looks? He lifted one perfect eyebrow. "She dashed away and chose a dwarf as her consort."

Caught off guard, I snorted again. "Now I know you’re jesting with me, Adriano. I glanced over to the door to see if the Pest lingered, but for once the dwarf had withdrawn with unaccustomed politeness and closed the common room door behind him. Still, he probably had his sticking-out ear pressed to the keyhole. I lowered my voice. Princesses don’t fall in love with dwarves, cheese brain! They fall in love with handsome princes like Adriano of Belleflower."

Not this princess. Adriano heaved another sigh. This one was—not what one might expect of the daughter of Queen Snow White and King Charming. In fact, she was exactly the sort of princess to fall in love with a dwarf. Well, half-dwarf, he amended, always fair. And now I’m to return home and inform King Arpeggio that his oldest son has failed in his duty.

Duty?

You know as well as I that Father expected me to secure the hand of the princess of Belleflower. What am I to tell him?

Tell him she was off her noggin, I said promptly, and you feared for the wits of your future children.

Adriano shot me a reproachful look. She was not ‘off her noggin’, Benno. She merely preferred a rather short, overly hirsute suitor of dubious parentage over me.

Off her noggin, I repeated. After all, hadn’t I followed my heroic older brother around for all these years and watched the girls swoon and simper over him? With my own eyes I’d seen what a polite smile from Adriano would do to the weak knees and weaker