Between Love and War

By Zibia Gasparetto and By the Spirit Lucius

Marked by strong emotions and permeated by a constant atmosphere of tension, the story "Between Love and War" takes place in Germany and France, in the midst of the horrors of the Second World War.

Present is the drama of Denizarth Lefreve, a French so

• Language: English
• Publisher: World Spiritist Institute
• Release date: Jul 29, 2023
• ISBN: 9781088240076

Book preview

PREFACE

Despite of the enlightened spirit’s dedication and love devoted selflessly to the tasks sacrificed in favor of the spiritual progress of mankind, the end of the tragedy and the pain have not been avoided in the manifestations of human needs expanding through their experiences in the arduous conquest of the moral and real values of life.

Since many centuries, God has been pouring out blessings and consoling revelations, seeking to guide and educate men to lead them to happiness and peace.

Meanwhile, the fights between selfish and ambitious, pride and vanity, have been confronting each other. Wars, fights, social crimes, and politics who establish all kinds of restorative and diligent consequences in the reconquest of equilibrium.

Blessed is the pain that awakens the creature!

Blessed is the struggle that creates conditions of readjustment and progress! Sublime ideal that makes us think of a world without pain and war, where everyone helps and loves each other!

Where respect and friendship, dedication and love establish patterns of equal rights and all social classes can live together without confrontation, with reciprocal prejudices, where all are esteemed and the borders between races and countries are open, without weapons or barriers!

Where politics is used for the good of all in the sacred ministry of progress!

Utopia!... many would say. I seem to see the incredulous smile of the majority, but I answer: obligatory goal of the future, destiny for which we were created. Evolution!

However, nothing seems more distant from Earth's current landscape than that conquest.

The troubled world groans in crises and wars, complaints and terror, cataclysms and suffering.

Morality seems to have disappeared and materialism bursts in once again, establishing conflict, praising addictions.

Nevertheless, the work of redemption continues inexorably. The immutable Laws of Divine Justice give to each one according to his works and time, it’s a constant friend, who takes charge of restoring the truth in the intimacy of the being.

Mankind is divided into two great groups: those who know and those who do not know. Those who already understand and those who are blind.

We wish to close ranks with those who believe in the future of the spirit, in the progress of mankind on Earth and with those who work to accelerate it, in the conviction that God gives us the joy of collaborating in His work; nevertheless, let us be aware of our inferiority and of our debt before the Divine Laws.

And precisely, since we have been soldiers of violence so many times, we decided to fight for peace.

Thus, we, spirits desirous of doing good, gathered around self-sacrificing instructors and we set to work, each one of us in our own activities.

In this way, in accordance with the provisions of our work, we gathered in assembly on the spiritual plane.

Our weapon, the love; our objective, the enlightenment; our desire, the conquest of peace and the liberation of mankind.

JESUS BLESS YOU

Lucius

São Paulo, March 30th, 1974

CHAPTER I

The Lifeguard Organization

There was a starry sky and the night was nice. In the large and cozy living room, we gathered as usual in the last few days preparing to join the group of workers in our spiritual colony who were preparing to collaborate for peace.

Fields of Peace, spiritual group of reception and assistance to the terrestrial mankind, dedicated to an enormous contingent of helpers and benefactors to do this task, not only by seeking to restore peace on Earth, but also by collecting, assisting and guiding the victims of wars and violence in the world.

The International Nurses' Fraternity, led by the self-denying spirit of Florence Nightingale, dedicates the greatest efforts in this field, devoting itself to all sectors.

It was with deep respect that we looked at their diligent figures, working tirelessly in an undeniable demonstration of dedication and resignation.

It was with excitement that we listened to Nurse Rose's prayer, opening the meeting, and then to Nurse Lee's firm words, encouraging us to do the task.

She described what was happening in the world and the horror that the constant threat of the new war awakened in every heart. We knew the problems of deaths on the battlefields.

We knew in part, what the dragging of passions can lead to the man pressed by hatred and war.

A deep emotion overcame us when she concluded:

-Partners! Let’s join to fight for peace! Our struggle is about love, joy, hope and light!

We know that the relief houses of our plane still host spirits maddened by bloody battle. We know of the painful rescues that many need to face even in the restoration of the peace they destroyed.

We know that men need to learn to love and to feel Jesus in their hearts. humanity lacks today more than ever the knowledge of spiritual life, the belief in incarnation and in the efficacy of divine justice, which no one has ever been able to deceive!

It’s necessary for men to know that every breach of peace represents a strenuous effort to restore the eternal good.

Partners! That is what we need to speak to men, to every heart, to every home, to every Spirit.

That’s why we are gathered here. Let us serve Jesus united and confident, without fear of the phalanxes of darkness that move incessantly enveloping men in the difficult hour that is passing. God is joy and peace. Jesus is the victory of good. Let us work and certainly united we will be able to realize with joy and courage new seedbeds of love".

I was touched. An enormous enthusiasm strengthened in my heart the desire to fight.

After the simple and emotional prayer, the meeting finished and I waited for the instructor who was going to give me the assignment.

Nurse Lee approached me with a broad smile.

I’m very happy to count on you.

I squeezed the hand she was holding out to me with affection.

- I’m very happy to be here, I am looking forward to the moment when we will start our assignment.

- Yes. We’ve got the group you collaborate with on Earth and we have been with them in the friendly exchange. It’s time to move on. I know you are looking for material for a new book for our earthly brethren and I think we have a special case.

I was interested:

- Have you already got it?

- Yes, come with me.

I followed her. We got through the harmonious and beautiful park that surrounded the meeting place and we walked a few blocks ahead. We reached a shiny, straight-lined building and entered. We walked through the hall and then into a small living room where a young couple was talking quietly, next to a boy who looked to be about nine years old.

Despite being calm, they were a little pale, showing that they were in convalescence. The kid, however, was in a better spiritual condition since his head was haloed with light. He seemed worried and a little impatient.

Seeing us, he ran to meet us and hugging the nurse, he said:

- You came! I've been waiting for you impatiently! We need to help him. I love him so much! We need to do something for him!

- Of course, my son -she answered firmly-we must trust in Jesus who doesn’t forsake us.

The couple stood up and approached us greeting us:

We tried everything, but he doesn't talk about anything else.

The kid looked anxiously toward the nurse and explained:

I’ve felt his thoughts of anguish and pain, he often thinks of me, he hasn’t yet found peace. It’s necessary that he knows that I didn’t suffer, he doesn’t know it. He doesn’t know it, he martyrs himself remembering my death! He has suffered a lot. I want to help him, I owe him so much, but now I can’t do anything, only God and you can help me!

The nurse smoothed her blonde hair and calmly answered:

Would you be calm enough to see him? Could you hold back?

Yes-answered calmly-I understand that my assignment on Earth was short in this incarnation and I feel good. But I can’t think of me while he suffers.

The young woman looked us excitedly and asked:

I also wish to do something for him. We've prayed but his pain is so great. We all owe him so much!

Naturally. Gratitude is a noble and just feeling. We appreciate your prayers on behalf of our friend and we need them.

Smiling, she looked to me saying:

He’s our friend Lucius who is part of the working group that will have to help our ward.

I smiled feeling touched as the three looked at me hopefully. She continued:

Very well, tomorrow we’ll come for you to initiate our actions on his behalf. There is a group who render aid on Earth and we’ll go with them.- Turning to the kid, add:

You’ll come with us

The kid’s face lit up

As for you, it’s too early to see the earthly landscape again. Here you can pray by sending us good and optimistic thoughts.

Both will remember immediately.

The child's expressive face attracted my sympathy and his loving vibration conveyed a great sense of peace.

We talked some more time and when we left I couldn't contain my curiosity:

Did this child disincarnate a short time ago?

Yes, a little over six months ago. I know what you are thinking. With so much light, does he still stop at this treatment house? He is a selfless and good Spirit. He could’ve gone to higher planes, developed his physical form, even taken on the appearance of the previous incarnation, but he doesn't want to because he wants to help the people he loves.

The couple accompanying him?

They were his parents on Earth, but they don’t yet have their understanding and the presence of their son give them great comfort. They were violently disembodied during World War II, leaving their son orphaned on Earth and spent long years of suffering and rebellion, worry and imbalance. The presence of the kid restored their joy and he comes with love and affection having their hearts prepared for the revelations of the higher life. Also, as you saw, there is someone on Earth that he loves very much and wishes to help.

Is this the case you told me about?

Yes, but I do not wish to influence your impressions by giving my opinion. Tomorrow we will go there and you will get in touch with reality.

Despite my curiosity, I didn't want to ask any questions, we arrived at the building where the nurse Lee lived. As we said goodbye, she smiled and said:

- Tomorrow at 8 p.m.

- All right - I answered -. See you tomorrow.

I waited for the next day with some impatience. We met at the exactly hour. The kid was waiting for us calmly; however, the brightness in his eyes expressed joy.

We joined the group of assistant nurses who would accompany some of the doctors who were dedicated to the relief of suffering mankind.

After a touching and delicate prayer, we left to the Earth’s orb.

I was always happy to see Paris again.

Memories, despite the years and centuries that have passed, awaken sweet and tender feelings in our spirits. We forget the sufferings and the struggles to keep only the nostalgia of a place where we lived, loved and learned.

It was a summer night. Our group went away and there were only the kid, the nurse Lee, an assistant and me.

We turn into a house not far from the center. Its appearance was well kept. We entered despite the treatment, the atmosphere was very sad and heavy. They were gathering for dinner. An elderly couple, a young lady and a man, seated around the table, ate in silence and without appetite. There was sadness in every countenance.

-Denizarth needs to eat, he’s without appetite again.

That was the comment I heard from the old lady, but I accompanied the group that seemed familiar in the house and they went towards the room.

Sitting on an armchair with his head in his hands, a young man, still young, seemed immersed in sad thoughts.

We approached him, but he didn’t feel us. At a gesture from Miss Lee, I turned my attention to our friend's brain, which was surrounded by a thick layer of dark ashen fluid that descended down the epigastrium and also reached the solar plexus. It was natural for him not to feel hungry with his biological functions paralyzed and his taste glands unable to activate the flow of the gastric mucosa.

Watch his mind- told me the nurse.

I paid attention to his front and I was could, astonished, to locate a brutal scene.

It’s what he thinks all the time- watched the touched kid smoothing his head with extreme affection.

Yes. It is a case of mental crystallization. We’ve observed him for some time and now our elders will determine the direct and objective help. Our brother is held in high admiration on the spiritual plane.

I saw her with curiosity

Come with me a moment please. I will give you what you need.

In one corner of the room was a small desk and inside the drawer, a handwritten notebook.

It’s Denizhart’s diary. Read it. It’s the story you were looking for.

Now?

Yes. You have enough time. Our friend's attention is going to detain us here for a few hours. Make yourself at home.

I approached the cabinet and concentrated my thoughts solidly on the pages of the notebook that remained closed inside the drawer.

With respect and affection, because of the secrets of that heart, the story was to begin…

CHAPTER II

The Battlefield

The Denizarth’s Diary

Under an odious fence we crowded together like a band of starving and thirsty individuals, in the dark trench.

The endless night roared around us, making a pact with the implacable enemy, hiding him from our aimed rifles and our wide-open eyes, wanting to penetrate the dark shadows.

Breath held and all senses channeled into smell and hearing. Nervous hands twitching on the butt of the rifles. A feeling of discomfort and terror. We knew we were lost. The enemy was cornering us in a dangerous siege. We dug the trench and knew that it would serve as our grave. A terrible taste of blood was rising in our mouths.

There were a little more than twenty of us, but we were willing to sell our lives dearly.

Minutes passed by very slowly. That horrible silence, that waiting, that tension.

Why don't those wretches come? - someone shouted who was then grabbed by the captain who commanded us.

We all are nervous, shut up. We are not going to rush things.

He pressed the soldier to his chest, muffling his voice. The boy sobbed in crisis. The atmosphere was becoming more and more unbreathable by every minute.

Where would they come first? When would they attack?

Even when we were attacked, our supplies were drastically reduced. We had almost no food left and water was becoming scarce.

Some partners rested while we were on duty and they woke up from the slumber in which they had wrapped themselves for pseudo-rest. They came to relieve the guard and in our turn we dropped to the bottom of the trench to try to rest.

Sleep was impossible. Although we had been in this hell for a short time, since we had faced many dangers, we had never experienced such dramatic moments. The violence and the unexpected German attacks, our lines, dismantled, defeated, we did not even know what would happen to our garrison.

I don't know how much time passed, if I rested or slept, I only remember that suddenly the machine guns started to work. I jumped up and grabbed the rifle and pulled the pelican.

Grenades exploded nearby and some of our people, hit, rolled around screaming in pain and spurting blood.

When we were ordered to go out and help, we obeyed immediately. The night was weakening to the first light of the dawn. As the night transformed into light, to the incessant noise of the battle, we confronted the enemies and managed to recognize them by their uniforms on which the swastika shone terribly.

At that moment, the gleam of a foil caught my eye: in a second, I understood the imminent danger. I diverted quickly and the bayonet scraped my arm where blood gushed a lot. I engaged the enemy in a supreme effort to defend my life.

We both rolled down a ravine and our fight was life or death.

At a certain point, my enemy hit his head on a stone and stunned himself for a second, which gave me time to kill him with revolver blows that I quickly pulled out.

At that exact moment, I saw an intense clarity while I was feeling a sharp pain in my right shoulder, I lost my senses.

When I woke up, it was already fully dawn. I thought I was in a dream, I felt very weak. Next to me, the German I had knocked down lay dead.

The floor was with blood and flies swarmed over the bodies. I saw several partners nearby. All of them are dead.

I couldn’t get up. I sat with great effort. I was dizzy. I could see, in spite of that, that we were in the middle of a ravine. They hadn’t seen us; we were in covered ground. I had regained my balance when I heard the sound of an engine. At the same time, I heard voices speaking in German.

I felt terrified. They were still around. If they saw me, they would surely kill me. They weren’t in the habit of picking up wounded enemies. They only took prisoners whom they could follow to concentration camps and forced labor.

They hadn’t seen us because we were on low ground and also there were tall trees covering us.

On the other hand, if I stayed there, wounded and without food, I would be condemned to a slow death with no hope of help.

That's when I came up with a daring idea. Quickly, I began to remove the blood-soaked clothing of the enemy soldier I shot down. The task was difficult because I was weak and wounded; the German's body was heavy and already beginning to stiffen.

I undressed him and spent some time dressing him in my clothes and dressing myself in his. For my plans, I even needed his underwear.

From one of the pockets fell a portrait and the face of an innocent teenage girl gave me a strange feeling of dread.

I felt I was living in another world, in a terrible nightmare. I put the portrait in his pocket and when I felt I was ready; I began to moan at the top of my voice.

From the noise, I perceived that free of our presence, they had camped nearby, they were feeding and caring for the wounded.

After a lot of moaning, pretending to be sick, I felt two stretcher bearers come to me and calmly put me on the stretcher.

Nevertheless, I closed my eyes and pretended to be senseless so that the plan could work.

I didn't want too much, just a chance to live. If I was discovered when I was better, maybe they would take me prisoner for some time or if I was lucky, until the war was over.

I thought about fooling them for some time. From my Slavic mother and French father, I inherited a strong resemblance to the Aryan type.

Only imminent death, the instinct of self-preservation, could give me calm, mainly because I knew that this was my only way out, if I wanted to survive.

I was placed next to another stretcher, on a truck. A sick person, seeing me moaning, gave me water and I drank avidly. I kept quiet. I couldn’t speak without giving myself away. The worst thing was that I didn’t understand anything of what they were saying to me.

I decided to keep quiet, I was very hungry and extremely weak. I was losing a lot of blood.

The truck started to move. As we traveled, I noticed that the nurse, tired, lay down to sleep. The other three wounded were in worse condition, sleeping or unconscious.

I looked up and saw a piece of bread in the backpack next to the stretcher. I got it like someone taking the most precious commodity in the world. It was hard and moldy, but I ate it anyway. I felt comforted.

Where would we go? I didn’t know. I fell asleep overcome with exhaustion, despite the sharp pain I felt in my shoulder and the dangerous and very special situation in which I had been involved.

When I awoke, at first, I had no clear recollection of recent events. Suddenly, startled, I remembered everything. I looked around the room and saw that I was in an adjoining house with sunlight transformed into a hospital.

The hall, where surely many joyful receptions had been held, was now the scene of war traumas.

Some beds, arranged to make the best use of the existing space, and stretchers formed the infirmary where I was.

Some talked with some animation while others groaned in prostration and suffering.

A nurse, seeing me open my eyes, approached me. She was of pleasant physiognomy, in spite of the impossibility of understanding her words. Checking the effort, she was making to elicit a response, I tried to show complete disorientation.

I took, at that critical moment, the decision to simulate a psychic trauma.

She tried in an affectionate voice to provoke a reaction from me. However, I remained obstinately silent.

At his persistence, I pretended a fit of terror, opening my eyes wide, staring at a distant point, showing fear and suffering. With an affectionate gesture, she tried to calm me down.

She immediately turned to a man who had just entered the room, wearing a white apron and with a tired face.

They talked, I sensed that they were talking about me. They approached me. He checked my pulse, patted my injured shoulder in a friendly way, then turned and gave some instructions to the nurse, leaving immediately.

I breathed feeling relief. It seemed to me that there was no immediate danger. The cruelest thing was not understanding what they were saying so as to know if they hadn't mistrusted me. Thus, some days passed.

How long could I go on with this farce? Being in direct coexistence with the enemy made me angry. They were the killers of my partners. They were the creatures I had learned to fear and hate. However, it was my life that was at stake.

I kept myself in constant vigilance, so that I would not fail to prove my true identity.

I knew the enemy was cunning, but the desire to live kept me quiet. At least, I was safe from the fighting, my wound was being tended to and I was reasonably well fed.

Sometimes, isolated, in forced silence, succumbing to solitude by the barrier of a strange language, I just focus my attention on myself, remembering the happy past. The university I never finished, the joys of home, among a beloved sister, a loving mother and an elegant father, sober but mostly delicate, polite, correct and dignified.

I closed my eyes and the memories came to my mind, so clear that when I opened them again, at first it was hard to reintegrate myself to the harsh reality, in the sad nightmare we were all living.

Many wondered the reason for war. Some choose it, others plan it in the unbridled game of ambitions. I, however, neither plAnad it, nor had political ambition, nor could I even choose. I saw my country and had no alternative but to go out to defend our homes in danger.

I never had the vocation for firearms, nor for killing; nevertheless, I felt the need to violate my principles in order to defend my own life and that of my partners. Friendship and teamwork, I already knew about that. It was what helped me to face the hardness of the battles without going crazy.

I didn’t feel hatred, but as time went by, seeing friends fall bleeding to death, seeing cities and villages subjugated, women raped and children killed, my heart began to harden and to think that the enemy also killed without remorse or sadness. I don’t know what would have become of me in those days without the memory of my lost happiness in living with my loved ones.

As the days went by, I began to improve physically very quickly. The wound in my shoulder was fine and it hardly hurt anymore.

One day, I noticed that there was joy in the air. Unable to understand their words, I learned to read the feelings in their facial expressions. I knew when they were joyful and imagined they were achieving new victories.

The doctor came into our infirmary noting on everyone's papers, giving instructions and the nurse accompanied him.

Arriving at my bedside, they stopped and naturally talked about me. It seemed to me that they were deciding on my fate because, being in perfect physical condition, I couldn’t remain in the hospital. However, I couldn’t return to the front because I was not in complete command of my mental health.

Controlling my anxiety, I looked at them indifferently, trying to show complete dislocation.

To be honest, the close coexistence with them made some words familiar to my ears and I intuitively began to understand them. I heard perfectly when he said the word return. After a few minutes the nurse returned and began to arrange my few belongings.

By his friendly face, I could tell that he was not suspicious of anything. It was evident that they were going to send me somewhere else.

Where? To the front?

Maybe I could run away and find my company again. Looking at me with some sadness, the nurse tried some questions. I smiled at her stupidly, but remained mute.

Giving a resigned sigh, she said no more.

Many times, to make the performance more convincing, I had sporadic attitudes, just like the soldiers in the hospital. I squared myself by clicking my heels together. I learned to laugh with them. I tried to copy their habits as much as possible. She gave me a clean uniform and a coat since it was winter, also a backpack, some provisions and then led me to the entrance hall where some soldiers were attending to the incidents.

He pointed me to one of the officers who stood stiffly behind a table. He looked at me sharply and his gaze gave me shivers. He seemed to want to get inside me,