Finding Me

By Rita Michaels

 

Tonia Enahoro is a regular schoolgirl studying relentlessly to escape from her detested Makoko Island water home in the future. Edward Landis is a rich, biracial newbie who found companionship in Tonia at school. Tonia lives with her aged single mother; Edward also lives with his aged grandmother. They come from two different social statuses but live in the slums. 

 

Over the years, their friendship develops. Edward wants to take things to the next level, but Tonia would rather wait. He plans a canoe picnic for two, but Tonia accepts his invitation with the condition that she returns early to her ailing mother and younger ones. This decision would change the course of her life.

 

Finding Me is a coming-of-age story of perseverance and the will to fight against all odds. It's a story about young adults finding themselves in circumstances that change them, their worldview, and the path they choose to take to succeed.

 

 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Rita Michaels
• Release date: Jul 1, 2023
• ISBN: 9798223039532

Rita Michaels

Rita Michaels enjoys writing inspiring stories from real life experiences that touch the heart. While not marrying pen to paper, and running after her overactive kids, she wanders in her thought; creating the next story in abstract.

Book preview

1

One little mistake and your world comes crashing down.

The sound of paddles brushing against the dark water filled my ears as I reached and pushed the oncoming canoe out of my way.

My paddler continued to my destination while I held on to my possession to prevent it from escaping into the murky Makoko water, which could be a definite permanent loss if I let go.

I didn’t have much to call my own, except a few clothes and shoes at home and a few notebooks secured in a black, nylon grocery bag sitting on my thighs. It was all the tools I had to eventually pull myself out of my water home and tread on solid ground that is the dry Lagos mainland, where people move with their feet without hearing the splashes of water.

Mom often told me that only educational success can get me out of the slums, and she begged me to focus so that I can have a better life than she has. I have tried to do so, but on countless occasions, I ask myself if it is worth it.

I snapped out of my reverie in time to see another canoe driving headlong toward me. I reached for it and grunted as I gave it a hard push.

The stench emanating from the water had grown pungent by the day as more tenants populated what I would call our haven.

Traffic weaved through the waters back and forth as people hawked their wares in canoes, and children followed along— they were returning from school like me.

Tonia!

I jerked and turned around to see the face of the caller whose voice I recognized.

Hey, Edward! I beamed. I thought you were home already. His boat sped past mine.

Yes, but.... He stopped and glanced around him, realizing he was about to air out his business in a very public place. We will talk later.

Um, anything important? I yelled, wondering what it was he wanted to tell me in private.

Later, he said, waving at me.

Edward and I shared the same classroom and teacher. A year ago, when he stepped into my classroom, he seemed lost and lonely.

The first few days, everyone wanted to be his friend because he was light-skinned and mixed-race. Everyone thought he was from a rich home because of the shoes and clothes he wore to school, but we were surprised after the first day of school when he rode in the same boat as us and stopped in a shanty house like ours.

We were more disappointed when this continued for over a month, then all his friends began to disappear, except me.

I turned to my paddler, noticing for the first time he wasn't as fast as I had thought.

"Oga, abeg you fit go faster? My mama dey wait make I help her with the twins. She newly born pikin.

He turned to me as if I had ordered him around.

Make I fly? You no see say people full everywhere? If you wan come down, come down abeg, he spat.

I gulped. No vex. It's just that my friend was behind me and now... I stopped when he gazed at me, his eyes were bloodshot.

Don’t tell me how to do my job. He turned and continued to paddle, but this time, the water disappeared faster as he rowed. I smiled.

My mom often tells me to fight for what I want and be persistent if I know it’s possible to get it.

My canoe finally rowed to my water house and stopped. I took a glance around my home and shook my head in displeasure.

The pile of rubbish cycling my home and other homes around me spoke of the increased population and the unsanitary state of Makoko.

I grunted and climbed on my deck after paying the paddler who returned to his business to make enough money before nightfall. I stood a little longer to examine the mess that I know I partook in creating and sighed.

A distance away is a city I would die to live in, and here I am stuck in this shithole because we can’t afford to live on dry land. I shook my head for the umpteenth time as hopelessness set in.

Baskets of fish can’t pay the rent; it couldn’t even put enough clothes on our backs. Every day of my life reminds me to never be a single mom. It’s the worst thing I would ever wish for myself.

I thought you had enough of the view of your surroundings. I swung around.

What the hell are you doing here Edward? I stood, transfixed. He never told me he was coming over. What gave him the effrontery to come to my house uninvited?

The smile on his face died. I thought you’d be happy to see me, he said, walking towards me.

Not at my house! My mom will kill me. I grabbed his arm and dragged him to the deck. You have to go now before my mom sees you.

Not before I tell you what I wanted to ...

"What is it? I said before catching myself, surprised at my tone. His eyes lowered.

I wanted to take you on a boat ride after school since it’s Friday, and I remembered you saying it was boring during the weekend. I bit my bottom lip.

I’m sorry, I said, my voice soft this time. I just don’t want my mom thinking I’m going about gallivanting with boys rather than focusing on my studies. It’s disrespectful to bring home a boy who isn’t my suitor.

He said nothing, but I could feel his gaze on me as I fixed mine on the deck boards a little disappointed at my temper, or should I say anxiety.

I should go. He walked towards me, covering the tiny distance between us and then stopped. I glanced at him. Our eyes locked. He seemed forlorn. It wasn’t the first time I turned down his offer and dimmed his excitement, and if I didn’t break this chain of procrastination, I might lose him as a friend.

What’s the plan? I asked. He nodded sideways as if to say forget about it. Tell me, I would like to know.

I don’t want to get you into trouble, he said and hopped into his canoe. I hadn’t realized it was floating beside my deck and out of the way.

Edward, I said I was sorry. Please don’t be like that. He rubbed at his temple making sure our eyes didn’t meet.

Edward is one nonpersistent guy. Goodness! I said in my head. Why do I have to ruin every opportunity to have fun with guys? What’s wrong with me?

I don’t want it to seem like I’m forcing you to go out with me.

You’re not, I said, cutting him short. Just tell me the plan and I will get ready.

What about your mother? he asked, his hand resting on the nape of his neck. I gazed at his handsome olive-toned face. I wasn’t sure if he didn’t want to go on a date with me anymore, or if he was genuinely concerned about me getting into trouble.

I will tell her I left one of my notebooks at school, and I would need to get it for my assignment tonight or I might get punished for late submission tomorrow. I beamed with smiles to mask the disappointment I felt for cooking up such a lie on a whim.

It worked because he smiled back. I sighed with relief.

The last person I ever wanted to offend was Edward. He had been such a huge support in my life I couldn’t even list all the things he had done for me like when he had to go home shirtless when my period decided to come unannounced at the strangest of times during my group presentation or was it when my mom lost her wares in the murky Makoko water and had nothing to sell for a while to afford food and Edward bought us a huge supply of food to keep us afloat.

It was countless, and what other way to show my appreciation than to go on a boat ride that could ease my mind off the recent ailment mom is experiencing?

You think she’ll buy that? he asked, jolting me out of my short reverie.

Yes, I believe she will. She likes it when I talk about books, studies, and anything that has to do with my intellect. Edward smiled.

Well then, I guess I should hurry up and put my plans in motion. He sat down in the canoe and picked up his paddle. I inched closer to satisfy my curiosity.

You never told me the plan, I said, gazing at his slim toes. They were fairer than other parts of his body more prone to exposure to the Nigerian sunshine we experience on a daily.

I tore my eyes off his toes to hear what the plan was and realized he’d been watching me staring at his toes, his right eyebrow raised. I looked away, embarrassed.

Do you have a fetish for toes?

No, I said then giggled. I don’t know why my eyes were drawn to them. He wriggled them.

Well, what do you think?

About what?

My toes. There must’ve been some thoughts racing through your mind because you did stare at them for quite a long time, he said, smiling.

Nothing, well, I think they are perfect. Isn’t that what you want to hear?

No, I wanted an honest opinion.

I just gave it.

Are you sure?

I paused. Is this your way of changing the topic?

Yes. He held on firmly to the paddles. 4 pm, and please, do not fail to meet me at Esther’s place. He turned to take the rope off where he had tied it to prevent the canoe from escaping.

What? I shut my eyes and tilted my head backward. I thought you were coming to.... Never mind. I held my lips, or I might say something to put him off again.

It’s part of the plan, he said. I sighed. I was beginning to feel weird about this boat ride he’s planning all by himself."

Is Esther aware of ‘your plan’?

Yes, but just a little bit. The part where she’ll have to be your witness should your mom have a reason to validate your excuse for leaving home. I nodded, a little disappointed that Esther was aware of something that involved me, but I wasn’t privy to the details.

I was never one who threw herself at the mercy of others. I liked to know what I’m doing, where, when, and how.

It’s supposed to be fun keeping you out of the loop, he said, watching me.

I’m not complaining, my face beamed, but it quickly disappeared. He pushed his canoe into position and began to row away.

Please don’t keep me waiting, he said over his shoulder.

I’ll try, I said, pondering on his words. Why Esther, despite knowing she wanted him, why she and not someone else?

I felt a drop of water on my skin and touched it before gazing up at the sky. It seemed a little cloudy. I glanced around me. The familiar boisterousness of Makoko Island continued without a pause. Another drop and I began to wonder if I had made the right choice accepting Edward’s request.

I walked into my living room to find my mom writhing in pain and crouched on the couch. I threw my school supplies on the floor and sat beside her.

Mom, what is it? She parted her lips but all I could hear were grunts. Her face contorted and all I could imagine was the intensity of her pain.

My eyes traveled down to her hands. She clutched her tummy as if holding onto dear life.

Your tummy hurts, I said, trying to pry her hand off it, but she was stronger than I thought. She nodded in affirmation.

Did you take your medication today? I watched her nod sideways. Have you eaten since I left for school? She nodded no. Mommy, you know you have an ulcer, and you are supposed to keep your stomach full."

My mom had been battling an ulcer for a few months now and it hasn’t been a joyride for her. She often didn’t eat much and fasted most of the time, but since the onset of the ulcer, Mom was advised to change her eating habit which obviously has been a herculean task for her considering she had indulged in the practice of eating less frequently for most of her life.

I rose to head for the kitchen and then stopped. Something was amiss. I swung around and stared at my mom.

Mommy, where are the twins? I dashed for the single bedroom we had in our stilt house, but I already knew they weren’t home because whenever I got back from school, I was either greeted by their playful noise