1, 2, 3 with Mrs. C: An Innovative Guide for Adult Interactions With Children

By Kathleen Covens

In 1, 2, 3 with Mrs. C, Kathleen Covens offers alternative ways to impact today's children. Sharing her struggles as a young teacher and the mother of a handicapped child, she provides insight and techniques to inspire those interacting with children. From putting magic in daily activities and learning ways to savor moments to the impor

• Language: English
• Publisher: Koehler Books
• Release date: Jul 18, 2023
• ISBN: 9798888240199

Kathleen Covens

Kathleen Covens is a first-time author. She gravitated toward early childhood education and was certified in the state of Texas as a teacher. After graduating from college, Kathleen married and had her first child, Shelly, who became brain damaged at thirteen months old. At the age of six, Shelly was placed in a permanent facility. Her sudden and lifelong disability made Kathleen realize how much we take for granted. Kathleen did not return to teaching until her second daughter,Katie, was nine years old. Her goal each year was to make a significant difference in the lives of children. After retiring, Kathleen felt compelled to share her experience and wisdom.

Book preview

INTRODUCTION

On Instagram, I saw a video of two lionesses reuniting with their first trainer. The trainer had not seen the cubs in seven years. In the video, the trainer was separated from the animal sanctuary, where the lionesses resided, by a metal fence approximately four feet high. As soon as the lionesses recognized their beloved trainer, they immediately approached the fence. The lionesses readily acknowledged her presence, stood up on their hind legs from their side of the fence, and wrapped their paws lovingly over the shoulders of the trainer. Both lionesses gently patted the trainer on her back and softly licked her neck and face. The instant recognition of the one who had spent time with them as cubs inspired them to embrace the trainer with a show of gratitude. Although it had been seven years since they had seen her, it was obvious that this trainer had indelibly impacted their lives and how they interacted with other humans.

This heartfelt interaction strongly supports my theory that what young people experience stays with them and becomes part of their identity. Have you ever considered how influential you have been to children or how influential you can be in the future? Whether you realize it or not, you will have a major impact on the lives of countless children: your students, grandchildren, nieces or nephews, or any other children with whom you interact. The commitment of adults to the younger generations has a profound impact on their lives.

When you picked up this book, you may have asked yourself, Who is Mrs. C, and what does she have to offer that is as easy as 1, 2, 3? As a retired teacher and a mother of two, I have taken great pride in my work with children. Throughout my twenty-five-year teaching career, I earned a strong reputation among teachers, administrators, parents, and students. Students in my kindergarten classes had a solid reputation for excellent growth at year’s end. I endeavored to meet them where they were and help them succeed both academically and socially. Over the years, I have been fortunate to interact with parents and students who have shared how I influenced their lives or the lives of their children. What an honor to know that what I did had a positive impact on others.

As a child, I grew up in Texas with six siblings, and I was the fifth child. Being surrounded by my siblings, I quickly saw differences in their personalities and individual characteristics. I also started taking notice of the quintessential uniqueness of individuals I encountered as a child.

I discovered my passion for investing in young children at an early age, when I began babysitting for children in my neighborhood at age nine. Developing this skill of establishing connections with children would eventually make me more effective in my interactions with children both as a teacher and as a mother.

Given my enjoyment of children, it was unsurprising that I gravitated toward early childhood education as I entered college. Upon graduation, I accepted a teaching position deep in the country of East Texas. I married, had a child, and taught a couple more years. When my daughter was thirteen months old, she became severely disabled and, at the age of six, was placed in a permanent facility. It was then that I truly became aware of the value of early childhood experiences.

When my daughter became disabled, it made me realize how much we, both parents and teachers, take for granted. I remember being a first-grade teacher, watching my students walk down the hallway. I saw children full of mental and physical possibilities that needed opportunities to reflect their innate abilities. Many years after finding a permanent care placement for my daughter, I returned to teaching with the insight only life experience can bring and spent another twenty years in the classroom. My goal each year was to make a significant difference in the lives of children. I knew that I could be a positive influence in their development—one child and one class at a time.

Decades later, I still find myself wanting to make a difference in the lives of children. Since retiring, I am now free to share my stories, challenges, and successes in the form of this book. This venue allows me to reach more parents, educators, grandparents, nannies, and others who want to consider strategies that have worked for me.

Unfortunately, we have so many distractions in our daily lives that it is hard to discern how to spend our time wisely. How do we make an impact on children when we are so busy? We start by being open to new ideas! We see the potential in children. We seek information that will make a difference. We stop doing what is not working. As a teacher, mother, and now an author, I feel compelled to share techniques that have worked for me. My hope for this book is that it will be an uplifting resource to help transform how you, the reader, interact with children. There is no greater feeling than making a difference in the life of a child.

This book contains techniques and ideas that have resulted from years of insight and experience. I share them with you to help make your experiences richer and long-lasting for both you and the children you encounter. Hopefully, you will find a multitude of ideas to consider. Remember, we are all evolving, and our lives are fluid. Chapters may resonate differently depending on your circumstance at the time chapters are read.

At the end of each chapter, I have provided questions for reflection. I encourage you to personalize the content of the chapter to fit your own circumstances. It has been my experience that if I write something down, I am more likely to remember it and more likely to commit to it. As a result, I have provided you space after each question to document the ways you can personally implement strategies that will work for you. This activity will empower you to make a change and give you the opportunity to identify your personal strengths that you will implement when interacting with children. Now is the time to positively impact future generations. Let’s get to it.

CHAPTER ONE

Moments Lost, Moments Savored

When I was thirty years old, I knew I needed a major change in my life. So, I quit my job as a first-grade teacher in the Dallas Independent School District. I was divorced and had just made the permanent placement for Shelly, my six-year-old multi-handicapped daughter. After Shelly’s placement, I switched my first name, Mary, with my middle name, Kathleen, and went on a six-week backpacking trip to Europe. My life was headed for the road less traveled. Taking this trip launched a new direction in my life.

Throughout this life-defining trip, I met many travelers and backpacked to seven different countries. What a vastly different experience from being a mother and an elementary school teacher. It was the trip of a lifetime that I had expected it to be, but at the end of the six weeks, I was ready to return to Dallas. I also knew that returning would be an adjustment.

After a long journey back to the States, I arrived at Dallas Fort Worth (DFW) International Airport. At that time, family and friends could meet travelers at the gate as they disembarked. Unbeknownst to me, my family had picked up Shelly at her residential facility and brought her with them to greet me at the airport. As I entered the terminal, I experienced exhilarating

happiness upon seeing Shelly and her surprised expression. I will never forget; she was sitting in a tiny red wheelchair and had two missing front teeth and looked like the quintessential six-year-old. It was an unexpected moment for both of us. Shelly is nonverbal, but both her joy and mine were unmistakable. At the first moment of recognition, Shelly and I burst out laughing. We were overcome with joy to be reunited. As the first round of laughter subsided, we sought out the sight of each other again, and more uncontained laughter ensued. This happened repeatedly for several minutes before I became aware of others who came to welcome me home. We were oblivious to anyone but each other. When we stopped, I noticed a throng of family and strangers gathered around us, and it was clear that Shelly and I were not the only ones impacted by our reunion. The unrehearsed, joyful moment of greeting was the culmination of many intimate hours spent together. It is what made this joy so spontaneously spectacular. It might seem that Shelly and I were robbed of a deeper relationship because we only had thirteen months before she became disabled. However, the richness of our intimate experiences as mother and daughter set the precedent for all the years that have passed since.

Time together gives us opportunities to create memories. Recently, I was at a women’s gathering called The Great Girls Network. The purpose of this group is to support social issues that are important to women. Part of the discussion the night I was in attendance was discussing how commonly time escapes us. One of the women speaking, Gloria, had worked in early childhood care, and her comments about the seasons of raising children resonated with me. She suggested there is a beginning season of infancy, followed by a more active season of toddlerhood. Then, the seasons of elementary school, middle school, and high school follow the season of preschool. After high school, the development of the child is complete and young adulthood begins. According to Gloria, the seasons of childhood development last about seventeen to eighteen years. Currently, Gloria has two daughters in their early twenties. When the girls left home, she went to their rooms and cried because she had difficulty remembering moments savored with them. Unfortunately, as a young mom, she had been busy with all the mundane activities that happen from day to day. Going to work, doing laundry, running a multitude of errands, etc. She found, like so many of us, that she had not prioritized her time with her girls as often as she now wished. Eventually, some memories were activated, but she felt a loss of moments she could no longer recall, and she wished she had been more present in the earlier seasons.

Thoughts like this are common, especially when we look at the past. Reflecting on my own life with my two daughters, I remember making two major decisions that impacted our time together and, ultimately, our relationships to this day.

When my oldest daughter became disabled, I knew her time at home was limited, so I decided to build memories and bond with her