Garbled Crock's Satire: Conservative Political Satire in Poetic Format

By Douglas .L. Crockett

My book has 75 poems, nearly all of them taken from current events. I am very conservative so they lean that way. There is a mixture of comedy and also more serious rants. Sometimes I get upset watching the news or opinion shows.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Archway Publishing
• Release date: Mar 24, 2023
• ISBN: 9781665740333

Book preview

Contents

The Election Blues

We Deserve

Oh Canada

Good vs Evil

When The Child Cries

2 Days Before Christmas

The Night Before Xmas

Joe &Friday the 13th

Woke No More

The Culprit

Joey the Racist

They! Who the Hell Are They?

A Warning

Bad Educations

I’m Sure

Back on Track

The Hag’s Back

Peas in a Pod

We the People

Ranting Again

The Promised Land

Document Dumper

Depressing Presser

Joe’s Tongue

A Sorry Sight

AKA-Joe Biden

Message #1

Sanity Breached

The Land of Debauchery

The Thing of It Is

Staying Focused

Behind the Barn

When Joe Went Down To Georgia

Biased Clown Shows

The Ballad of Nancy

Perverted Pedos

Message To The GOP

No Trust

The TDS Bandwagon

My About Face

Land of the Lost

Rumors of Evil

Biden’s Big Lie

Independents

Progressives

Get Your Damn Act Together

The Smell on the Hill

Blind, Deaf and Dumb

What Can Democrats Do

What Can Democrats Do

A Woke Awakening

What A Good Deal

Hunter Had A Gun

Who’s Walking Now

The Streets of L.A.

Amorality Reigns

Yeah Right

Look in the Mirror

Joe = Joke

A Prayer For The Times

WTH

Hillary’s Legacy

The Cabal

New Face Of Evil

The Raid

A Double Edged Message

She’s Talkin’ Bout Joe

I Will Not Be Controlled

Angel’s Wings

Hero or Zero

This Is More Like It

The Way It Seems

I decided to start my book with this poem as it [IMHO] is the reason Donald Trump lost the election and the reason we are all suffering from THE ELECTION BLUES

The Election Blues

There’s trouble in the air tonight.

I feel it everywhere. I’ve got a sinking feeling.

This election isn’t fair.

The ballot box was loaded.

Filled right to the gills.

Full of phony ballots, to subvert the people’s will.

They handed out assignments.

Putting suitcases into hands. Full of phony ballots.

Just the way they planned.

Drop it at the backdoor and get paid twenty grand.

They’re not sorry that it ends like this.

But someone had to lose. It’s the nature of this business.

It’s the election blues.

The fraudsters and the cheaters, Demonrats, sometimes the law.

The pay-offs and the rip-offs, the crimes nobody saw.

Don’t matter if it’s Biden or other commie trash.

You can always buy elections. All it takes is cash.

There’s lots of crooked demonrats. Lots of shady deals.

All of them have alibis. In case somebody squeals.

It’s the draw of gaining power. A lust that’s very real.

You would understand it better.

If you share my views, It’s the ultimate of con-jobs.

It’s the election blues.

You’ll see it in some headlines. But never on fake news.

Demonrats claim they’re not behind it. It’s not the way they play.

It’s fraud down in Atlanta. It’s common in L.A.

It’s cheating up in Michigan. The fraud is here to stay.

It’s an old commie strategy. Deciding who will lose.

It’s the politics of Demonrats.

It’s the election blues.

D.L. CROCKETT 11/18/ 2020

The next poem [WE DESERVE]

I wrote this recently but thought it DESERVES a spot closer to the front of the book.

We all deserve a better government than what we’re getting now, which is nothing but hurtful policies that show exactly how our leaders [oftimes] on both sides of the aisle, DON’T CARE.

We Deserve

We deserve transparency, we’re told there’s nothing to see.

We’re told by bureaucrats how things are going to be.

We deserve explanations, we’re fed gobbledygook.

Although our heads are spinning, from listening to crooks.

We demand our tax dollars are not frittered away.

Yet the national debt is growing by billions each day.

We believe in a free press not a compromised media.

We say leave our kids alone democrats push pedophelia.

We think public schools are where the 3 R’s are learned.

Imagine our horror when transgender kids are returned.

We elect politicians who supposedly represent our views.

And seem to get crony-capitalists who do as they choose.

We think police have been hired to protect us and our streets.

Not to be babysitters for perverts and drugged up deadbeats.

We deserve a judiciary that does not coddle criminals.

The results of this pandering to America will be terminal.

This is our country, not some marxist new world order.

We demand an end to the invasion on our southern border.

We demand the same country that our ancestors died for.

Not some communist pipedream the left has in store.

We want our guns and religion and our Bill of Rights.

A return to the days of the past when we win the fights.

We demand fair elections, bereft of democrat fraud.

We demand our rights not be trampled over roughshod.

We want the Pledge of Allegiance to ring in school halls.

We want "One nation under God with Liberty and Justice for ALL!

D.L. Crockett -- 1/16/23

I Wrote the next poem {OH CANADA} after hearing that they were going into the government assisted suicide business. It might seem I’m exaggerating things but I don’t think so. I can see this kind of wholesale denigration of life and religion happening here.

Oh Canada

Are you tired of living, do you need help dropping out?

Come see us in Canada, death is what we’re about.

Why go through all the suffering, We’ve got your pill.

Go out without whimpering, we’ll foot the bill.

Let us worry about God, we’ll accept all the blame.

It’s assisted death, some say murder, what’s in a name.

So pack up your kids, and start up your car.

It’s a hop, skip and a jump, relief’s not very far.

We offer 2 for 1 discounts, 2 adults for the price of one.

We’ll toss in your family, we’ll get you all gone.

Don’t worry about paying, put us into your will.

Nothing to worry about, you’ll just be swell.

Don’t worry about burial costs, we use only mass graves.

No monuments or headstones saying God Saves

When the mass graves are filling, we’ll use lots of lime.

Until the bodies dissolve and turn into slime.

We’ll doze the pit over and excavate