Dr. Wetbrain Presents - Drinking Fun 2.0

By Dr. Wetbrain

This coffee table book is all about alcohol fun, trivia and facts. Information filled with booze history, modern liquor inventions, funny drunk stories and drinking games.
Entertain yourself and others with all sorts of liquor facts like – did you know that wild animals like to get drunk? Also, there is booze on the International Space Station.
Booze history – before bombing Pearl Harbor the Japanese pilots had a drink of Sake from a ceremonial cup.
Drinking fun – funny stories and unique drinking games.

Who the hell is Dr. Wetbrain?
Dr. Wetbrain, who has turned 65 this year is an interesting, gentleman. Besides always dressing in dignified attire from the 1800s, he seems almost normal, also a happy guy. He also knows a little bit about everything.
Great entertainment for your man-cave, the bus, living room, or the toilet. Show your friends how smart you are with your newly found knowledge on booze.

Cheers.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Dr. Wetbrain
• Release date: Jan 22, 2023
• ISBN: 9781777167905

Book preview

Dr. Wetbrain.

Hello, my name is Randy Ruth. I am an investigative reporter for the Backside Chronicle on an assignment to ask the hard questions and find out who is this slightly famous Dr. Wetbrain.

My interrogative journey began walking down a well, worn path, through a thick lush, wooded valley, where you can faintly hear old country music, laughter, and some sort of yelling in the distance.

Following this boisterous sound, suddenly, you come to a small clearing surrounded by a thick fence of evergreen trees.

In the middle of this small grassy clearing sits a quaint, depleted three-bedroom house. Very weather worn, old black wooded siding. Nothing fancy, but efficient.

The sounds are getting louder as I near the house. Suddenly, I see a yard nicely decorated with empty beer, wine and whiskey bottles. Perhaps the owner has a ‘bottle return’ investment plan of some sort. I see the door is wide open. No wait.... There is no door.   

Near the doorstep is.... I don't know who. someone who is curled up in a fetal position. And passed out drunk. Complementing the rest of the front yard’s decor.

Stepping towards this old house, trying not to use this 'one too many beers' guy as a doormat, I step in through the front door.

Holy Cow! All that noise echoing through the calm wooded valley, is from two old men sitting at a rickety homemade table. And a very old ‘eight-track’ stereo on the floor, cranked right up, loud and distorted.

Dr. Wetbrain and his buddy, Harold. So, there they are, these lifetime best friends. Talking loudly and talking all at the same time. Telling each other a separate story (at the same time), with their eyes shut. Not listening at all to each other. Stories they have long heard, over and over.

Dr. Wetbrain, who turned 64 this year, is an interesting gentleman. Besides always dressing in dignified attire from the 1800s, he seems almost normal, also a happy guy. It looks like he shaves sometimes.

Whenever I ask him about shaving, he would reply, I shaved last month, what more do you want? 

The doctor gets to a drinking point, though, where he starts rambling on and starts telling stories about old wood cutting jobs and working at a pulp mill, plus traveling tales to little towns nobody has heard of. Interesting stories told over and over, and over again. With his eyes shut. Or do they look that way!??

I have done experiments with Dr. Wetbrain. Are his eyes really shut, or can he still actually, see? So, to test this I stealthily took away his bottle of beer that was in front of him.

He suddenly stops his story midstream. Slowly opens one eye. And, in a low stern voice said, What are you doing with my beer? Put it back!

I have concluded that the almost famous Dr. Wetbrain definitely has one fun, unique personality. Even while intoxicated, which is almost always, the doctor seems to know a lot about everything.

Oh, if you are wondering about old Harold. I have been taking notes on everything that Harold said. Stay tuned.

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Dr. Wetbrain’s

Gin History.

Roving reporter Randy Ruth here. Day 6.

Just woke up off the couch thinking.... Where the hell am I?

Now I remember. I’m at Dr. Wetbrain’s hovel. At that moment, I heard drunken babbling coming from the front porch, on such a nice sunny morning. Needed to check this out. Yes, the doctor and Harold are drunk again.

Dr. Wetbrain

Through my blurry eyes, from the distance I can see a lady who is wearing a very bright white with red flowers dress coming out of the woods down Dr. Wetbrain’s path, with a large humanlike, something, following her. As they came into the yard, we found out that the pretty, flowery, blond, tall, big boned girl was Wilhelmina. Willy for short, which she made sure we knew.

Following behind her pulling a large cart with carved out flowered sideboards was this huge muscular, no neck, blonde Swede named Sven. Sven never spoke for some reason. He probably learned long ago that you can’t get a word edgewise with Willy. Sven’s cart, to the doctor’s surprise, was filled with lots of gin, limes and tonic water. There were tulips in big jars with water and tubs of ice on the side. They even had large plastic glasses for everyone.

After everyone was introduced, Willy started pouring everybody gin and tonic drinks. When she gave Dr. Wetbrain his drink she said, When I heard about you, I knew you were a man I wanted to meet. So here I am!

The doctor with his half grin, Thank you. I think?!

Willy smiling back asks, "So you like gin?"

Wetbrain nodded, I think so, let’s give it a try.

Giggling, Willy started her story. "Let me tell you all about gin." There was no stopping this one!

"In the beginning of 1600’s in Holland, gin was made with corn and barley. It was sold as medicine for stomach problems, gout and gallstones."

Need another dose of medicine here, nurse. Dr. Wetbrain interrupted as he lifted up his empty glass. Willy took the glass and started pouring him another gin and tonic and continued the story.

To make the gin tastier, those clever Dutch added juniper berries for flavor, which these berries also have medical uses also. Like for the pee tract. Juniper berries.... You know? It’s an evergreen tree that looks like a spread-out bush. Yah, you know!

"I think gin was first introduced to North America when the settlers from England arrived."