From Pitfalls To Purpose: A Story of Hope, Resilience, Empowerment A Memoir of Forgiveness

By Bridgette Lewis

Empowering you to reach your dreams regardless of obstacles, Bridgette Lewis' life lessons focus on inspiration and courage. Lewis shares how to master setbacks and losses of all kinds and win at life. Using her own powerful experiences of overcoming adversity as examples, her journey will fill you with hope. Lewis' story is one of repeated hardships and trauma, but also of restoration and reinvention. Through all the ups and downs, Lewis followed her passion for words, writing and speaking which lead her to purpose. She's a powerful speaker, mentor and certified personal development coach teaching others how to move pass pain and live a life filled with purpose. She now stands Whole and Complete moving from Pitfalls to Purpose. She believes faith, her tenacious inner spirit and drive is proof that all things are possible if you just believe. Follow us on Twitter! Click Here! Follow us on Instagram! Click Here! Follow us on Linkedin! Click Here! Visit us at ! Click Here!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Apr 11, 2019
• ISBN: 9781644588079

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From Pitfalls To Purpose

A Story of Hope, Resilience, Empowerment A Memoir of Forgiveness

Bridgette Y. Lewis

Copyright © 2019 by Bridgette Y. Lewis

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Author’s Autograph Page

This Book Belongs to:

Bridgette Y. Lewis

To my big sister, Loyce: I’ve always admired your straightforward approach to life and tell it like it is style. Thank you for leading the way.

To my aunt, Vera Mathis: The wisdom you’ve shared with me about life should be bottled and sold.

To my late mother, Sara Jo Miller: Your unconditional love carries me. You stood by me through thick and thin; you saw the greatness in me before I developed. You birthed in me a get back up fighting spirit to never quit.

To my late grandfather, Richard H. Bass: You are the standard and one of the finest examples of manhood and what chivalry looks like. When it comes to wisdom, strength of character, and courage, you showed me how a man should love a woman. Your example of pure love is forever etched in my heart.

To my son, Blake: You have been the wind beneath my wings. I grew up while teaching you. There is greatness in you—go for the gold.

To my girl pal, Marsha Price-Driscoll: We started as little girls on this friendship journey and here we are, four decades later.

To my brother-in-law, Jon Wheatley: Thank you only tips the iceberg of what my heart wants to say. You’ve provided and sacrificed much for our family without asking for anything in return. I appreciate you.

Foreword

By Maura Gale

From Pitfalls to Purpose is one of the most transparent stories I’ve ever read about the will to survive and the inner strength one must possess to share secret struggles so openly. Bridgette Lewis writes honestly about the choices she made, the challenges that transpired and the consequences she faced as a result. Her story is not pretty; however, her testimony is beauti-ful!

I believe every one of us has a story to tell, but most of us are too afraid or too ashamed to tell it. It is in the sharing of our personal pain, shame, and humiliation that other people are able to see themselves, locate the lesson, and allow the healing to begin.

Bridgette peel’s off the layers in her life giving us a sneak peek to ensure we get inspiration and insight into life is phenomenal. We get to glean and gasp at the mistakes she’s made while wincing at the injustices and abuses.

Her writing style is quite captivating. It’s a fusion of raw leather and smooth suede, blending an intriguing play on words together wonderfully.

While reading From Pitfalls to Purpose, you’ll be amazed at the sheer determination she exhibited to support and raise her son as a single mother and the will she possessed to make a message out of a mess. Bridgette put up a valiant fight against her p­ersonal fears, finances, and failures, as well as her painful past of abuse and abandonment.

How did she make it through everything? some will ask. After reading this book, others will come to understand that everything she experienced was being used as a part of the righteous resolve that only God could create to get her to His destination of being whole and complete and perfect for His purpose.

Maura Gale is the author of Beyond Blessed and Anointed Agenda and an actress and evangelist.

Introduction

As you read From Pitfalls to Purpose, you may recognize yourself in a scenario or two—needing courage while facing fear; walking boldly ahead as you build up resistance for the challenges that await. If you’re tempted to quit, don’t—that’s the easy way out. Never stop hoping or give up as life’s adversities blow your way, with an attempt to move you from reaching your full potential.

I’ve written this book to give you strength for the journey. I know firsthand what failure looks and feels like. Failure has been my greatest teacher and biggest motivator. I knew it was only temporary and that there was more for me in life than I experienced.

From Pitfalls to Purpose is an empowerment guide on how to let go of wrong mind-sets; a guide to show you that, with the right mind-set, you can rebuild your life and boost your confidence.

From Pitfalls to Purpose is about the mistakes, and wrong choices humans made but understanding that God has a perfect plan for your life and it’s never too late to begin again.

From Pitfalls to Purpose is about new beginnings and what life looks like in the middle of a setback. You must be courageous and stand when you’ve experienced trauma, betrayal, loss, setbacks, or adversity. Do you know someone who’s at a crossroads in their life, who’s not certain which way to go. Life can try even the strongest person—hold on! Your breakthrough is coming.

It is my desire, with my transparency, that through various transitional stages, you’ll see lessons and gain clarity and understanding that all things are possible for those who believe.

Imagine yourself overcoming impossibilities and dealing with the tough moments of your life. Understand how resilient you are. In each stage of life, you can reinvent or restructure your life based on your priorities. Have you been knocked down? You can begin again. Learn to live an empowered life with the right strategy, tips, and tools.

Do you need to forgive someone who has hurt or abandoned you? You’ll see that forgiveness is not for the other person—it’s actually for you. Experience breakthroughs in every area of your life and unlock the door to your prison, releasing the pain of the past. Forgive anyone who has let you down, hurt you, disappointed, or wounded you.

In life, everyone faces challenges. We all have doubts and may have been treated unfairly. From Pitfalls to Purpose was written for anyone who would give up hope. It is for the teen girl who looks for love in unhealthy relationships instead of looking within, before she learns her true value and self-worth. From Pitfalls to Purpose is for the woman who has settled for less than she’s desired but finds self-love on the road to recovery—understanding she is valuable, worthy, and lovable—and in the end, she triumphs.

Part 1

Pitfalls

Chapter 1

Losing Innocence

I was seventeen years old when a piece of my soul was taken. I was no longer fresh, clean, or a virgin; I was in shock and disbelief. Sex, as good as you see and hear about on television and in the movies, didn’t play out like that for me. It was horrible. My innocence was taken. My virtue was gone. I was ugly; I didn’t see this coming. The one thing that was mine and mine alone was my body, and I had control over it—or so I thought.

My first summer boyfriend, Michael, lied to me, inviting me over to his house to swim. I told him I couldn’t swim and he said, Don’t worry, I’ll teach you everything you need to know. I had no reason not to trust him. It was a hot summer day and getting in the water would cool us off. I could dog-paddle a bit and I was excited to take my first swimming lesson and have Michael teach me. But that day, when I left Michael’s apartment, I learned about shame, pain, and hiding, and I lived my life that way for a long time.

He was squashing me, my hands pinned down and my knees locked. He was heavy and I couldn’t push him off me. He started kissing me fast and hard, and I told him to stop. The more I asked, the more he kissed me, but it was gross and didn’t feel right. He was bigger, taller, and stronger than me. I thought if I asked him nicely, he would think about what he was doing and stop—but he didn’t; he wouldn’t.

The windows in his apartment were open with no screens. The wind was blowing a bit and I saw the curtains moving in the wind. I was crying and screaming, begging him to stop and to get off me. I was hoping that someone—anyone—would hear and come and help. He promised me that it wouldn’t hurt and that it would only take a few minutes, but it did hurt—the pain was excruciating. I continued to cry and fight until I was tired. I felt the hot tears run down the side of my face. He said we were friends, but he made me cry; my insides felt raw. I was burning and he made me bleed. The only thing I knew in that moment is that I was different. The little girl with the big voice was now silent. He made me swear not to tell anyone, so I kept that dirty secret.

I didn’t feel good about myself after the rape. I felt gross, awkward, and nasty; I felt like a nobody. The world looked different to me. As emotions go, the only thing I could process was what happened to me—it wasn’t right; it was a violation. I felt danger and I was afraid, and scared but not able to really verbalize all that took place. My self-esteem was lost that day, in that moment. I was different and my thinking changed. I didn’t see men the same.

If this is what love looked like, I didn’t want any part of it. Sex was painful. Who could I tell? He told me not to. Who would believe me? I had just turned seventeen. I had a voice, but I didn’t know how to use it or how powerful my voice would later become. My voice would be my way out; my voice would be my sounding board.

Growing up in the early 1970s, you just didn’t talk about sex. Sexual intercourse was taboo, and to talk about sex was off-limits—that was grown folks’ talk. I recall in sixth grade, my teacher gave me a permission slip for my mom to sign so I could watch a video at school about sex and venereal disease and how young girls will start their menstruation cycle. The film discussed how women had babies. That was my introduction and the extent of what I knew about sex at the age of seventeen. Mama reminded my sister and me to keep our dresses down and our legs closed, and that was the follow-up to the movie on sex and babies. She said, If you get pregnant, I’m going to whip your behind and send you to your daddy. That was a threat we didn’t like or want, because we knew Mama’s word was law. We did what she said, and besides, we didn’t know where our dad was, but wherever he was, it must have been dreadful and awful because we rarely heard from him or saw him.

In the Afro-American family in the early ’70s, there were certain subjects you just didn’t talk about or mention: sex, money, and most times, religion. I felt nasty and dirty, as if I’d created the situation with Michael. He was a freshman in college, and he seemed so nice, and we both shared a mutual friend. He wanted to talk with me days after the rape, but I said no. I never looked at him the same and I didn’t want to be around him. He was a bully; he hurt me deeply. I don’t think he had a clue of the extent of my pain. The assault created a deep emotional wound. Michael stopped calling and coming around. Mama moved us to a new neighborhood—I was so happy; I could try to erase and forget the nightmare.

Mama moved us out of our three-bedroom rented house into a two-bedroom upstairs apartment next door to a very popular neighborhood liquor store. Mama wanted to pick up some extra hours to make money, so she started working at Speed Spot Liquor store as a bookkeeper. One day, Mama asked me to go to the store and pick up something to drink. I saw Michael’s car in the parking lot—I recognized his putrid green 1977 Duster. I freaked out and ran back home, wondering what he was doing in my new neighborhood after what he had done. I asked myself, how did he find me? I wanted to be safe.

I later asked the store owner, Mr. Charles, how he knew Michael, and he said, Oh that’s my nephew, my sister’s boy. The thought of him being next door to my apartment brought on more fear. I’d see Michael’s car once in a while when he wasn’t in school and I had to walk past the store to the bus stop to get home. Seeing him and his car nauseated me; I felt like throwing up. I couldn’t get his bad-smelling and