Desire Life Now: Overcoming Your Roots to Live the Desired Life

By Vera Bonse

Desire Life Now depicts my life struggles, my mistakes, my weaknesses, disappointments, betrayals, rejections, and dealings with family foundations; my triumphant journey in the discovery of myself, my purpose, and destiny in the midst of all the chaos. My overcoming to become the person I am today came with me finding God who is reflected and manifested in my image as I am his child.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Aug 27, 2020
• ISBN: 9781098025717

Book preview

1

The Meaning of Life

The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.

—Romans 8:6

On January 25, 2014, after two days of being in labor, I welcomed my daughter into the world. I heard the loudest cry. That cry was my daughter announcing she was alive and had finally entered into this life. That day, I clearly understood what life was. Even though I had felt her for nine months in my womb, the cry that sounded like a heavenly trumpet was my awakening moment to the meaning of life.

King David once asked God in his time of immense suffering, If I go down on the pit, who will sing of your praises? He was referring to death here and how, if he is without life, there is no way he could still keep exalting the name of God. Life is breath that is given to you by God. When you have the breath in you, you are considered to be alive. This breath brings your soul, body, and spirit to life. In fact, the book of Genesis informs us after God was done creating man, God breathed into man, and man became a living soul. Your life breath is given to you by God, your maker, and your creator.

Throughout my thirty-something years here on earth, I have struggled with what life means. Ask anyone you meet what life means to them. We will all come up with thousands of definitions as to what life means. But here is what I have come to know the meaning of life to be: From the very first breath you take to the last you breath, will account for choices you made. Each time I hear someone has passed on and I read the story of their life, I’m always amazed at how the meaning of life is always reflected in the way they lived their lives. I pose this question to you: What is the meaning of life? What does life here on earth mean to you? Pause once in a while in your busy, noisy life and ask, What is the meaning of my life? If I were to depart this earth today, what did this life I had here mean to me?

In June 2003, I was living in Botswana with my family but was preparing to come to live in the US in August to attend college. One late afternoon, I had gone for a run when I was hit from behind by a car. As I lay there on the roadside, I couldn’t feel my body and I thought I was dead. Lying there by the side of the road was my wounded body and a life that was about to drift out of me. I just heard myself ask God, So this is it? This was all my life meant?

I quickly felt my body again and that pain of being critically wounded, yet I was numb to the suffering. In other words, I couldn’t feel the pain, even though I was in pain. I then opened my eyes and saw people talking over my body like I was dead.

Then I felt my body being lifted into a car to be rushed to the hospital. I remember still having the conversation within my soul with God. Is this all my life meant? To be born and then die like that? Later on, after I recovered from this near death experience, I began to understand what our life really means. I also was asking God why he allowed this to happen to me, why he didn’t even warn me or even prevent me from going for a run this day. Then God informed me, But I did, and that’s why you are alive.

I was a bit confused. He did bring into my mind the day before the events at the salon. I was to attend the interview for my student visa to the US. However, my hair was undone. I needed to take my nice pictures for the visa and also get ready. The day before my accident, I had gone to the salon to get my hair done. The lady informed me she couldn’t get it done. I reminded her she worked for my mother and if I didn’t get my hair done today, she would be in big trouble. I was about to pick up the phone and call my mother when she gave in to my demands.

I usually would walk away and come back the next day to get my hair done. But for some reason, there was a strong desire for me to get my hair done. She weaved the extension into my hair and it was what saved my life. My head had hit the windshield of the car. The screen was broken into pieces, but because my weave was very thick, my head didn’t crack. Had it not been for the weave, my head would have cracked from the impact it had on the windshield. I was alive because God was pushing me to get my hair done. I always go for a jog every day during that time. For some reason, I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary on this day. But God saw the wicked plans of the devil and was already making provisions ahead. I was supposed to die that day, but God saved me. It got me thinking again about this life and what it means to me.

Is there a purpose to life, which makes it meaningful? What is its purpose?

One day, as I was sitting in one of my college classes, in which we were always bombarded with creative writing, I had to answer that question of what I want to be when I grow up. I always knew I wanted to do some work helping people. First I thought of being a doctor but was too lazy to accomplish all the lab work and long years of medical school. Then I thought of going to law school to defend those that were innocent. I could never pinpoint the exact profession, yet I knew my passion was to serve others. So I beautifully wrote my essay, depicting my long-term goal of making a mark or changing the world.

I’m not quite sure it was the answer my professor was looking for, but somehow, within those imaginary writing assignments, I knew my purpose. We wander this earth without knowing our purpose, and that can determine what we believe to be the meaning of life. You see, it’s not enough to just have this breath within your soul, but it is also important to accomplish meaning with the breath.

When God breathed life into man, he purposed them to have dominion over everything on earth, in water, and in the sky. Already the breath that was given to them was for an assignment, and the purpose is hidden in the assignment. From that time, you always have to recognize that not understanding and discovering this purpose can make you a wandering soul, not knowing what the meaning of life is for you.

I repeatedly say to my friends, You will always have to find it in your heart to engage God in order to know your assignment, your true purpose, which brings meaning to your life. Once you know what that purpose is, then you can understand what the meaning of life is for you.

There are many talents that God placed within us which, if we pay attention to it, can lead us to our purpose and give us a true meaning of life. I remember since I was a child, I could see things beyond what my physical eye is allowed to. I could tap into people’s inner beings and could tell you that’s a person I need to be watchful of and there is danger there. I never understood why I was like that.

One night, when I was about twelve years old, I was deeply asleep. My parents had traveled and left my sister and I with their friend whom we called Auntie. While asleep, even though my eyes were closed, I saw the door to our bedroom open. A woman walked in and then sat on me. I remember struggling to breathe and I felt I was dying. Even as a child, I knew to cry out to Jesus, because Sunday school had drilled that into me. I started saying, Jesus! But I couldn’t open my mouth.

Then I heard a voice say to me, Whisper Jesus within you.

So I closed my eyes and started whispering, Jesus. Then I heard the cock crow, and the woman got up and left. A couple of days later, I had malaria and almost died. But while at the hospital and losing my strength, again I heard that voice telling me to call Jesus. I came back from the hospital, and it took me weeks, but I finally regained my strength and health.

After the incident, I had several more encounters of the spiritual realm, which I will later elaborate on in the Spiritual Warfare chapter. But most importantly, I now understood I am a seer, and this will have a big impact as to my purpose here on earth and how that could change lives for God’s kingdom.

To end this chapter, let me share an amazing encounter, which firmly allowed me to know life’s meaning. On October 24, 2016, I woke up from a dream and was so disturbed by it, yet very excited. I called my friend who is also like me, a seer. He immediately encouraged me to share this dream on my Facebook wall. I had a dream in which I saw two hands from heaven. Then I looked down and saw two large jars. On each side of the jar stood Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. Then I saw the hand from heaven pouring sand into Hillary’s jar. It went so fast but stopped right before it reached the top. I kept waiting for the top to fill up; it didn’t.

Then I saw the other hand pouring sand into Donald Trump’s jar. His jar was filled to the top and overflowed. I turned to Donald Trump and said, Congrats, I guess you have won. Then I woke up. On November 9, 2016, we all woke up to the news that Trump was the president-elect. This right here was what I understood God had sent me here to do. I am in the profession of social work, and my passion for serving others has led me here. But each time I interact with my clients, the spirit of God is always at work to empower me to serve them better.

I don’t know what your struggles are in life. In fact, sometimes I have come to believe you find no meaning in this life when you are bombarded with trouble from left to right. You ask yourself, is this life worth living? I have come to that junction so many times. I wanted to die or even kill myself, but that still small voice always speaks into my heart, letting me know my life means something. I have to live this life to fulfill my purpose. That purpose will lead someone to believe in God and also help them to fulfill their life’s purpose.

You see, we are all here for each other. Don’t let modern society fool you into thinking your life is only yours. There is an African proverb that goes like this: It takes a village to raise a child. Not just the parents of the child are to raise him or her, but the entire community. This proverb has always shown me something about life’s meaning. It says to me I am who I become because of my community; I am connected to every member, even though I’m not related to them by blood.

When I look at my life, look at my children, my family, and my connection to everyone around me, life gives me meaning to live and embody it. You don’t have to have millions or have all your bills paid to understand what life means. You can have an empty fridge and an empty stomach or even be suffering from an incurable illness; but to your very last breath on this earth, there is meaning to life.

Look at the birds in the air or even the plants that don’t last in the ground; every spring, they beam with joy to bless us with their beauty and fragrance.

I am speaking with you who have concluded that your life means nothing because you are facing adversity. Do not end it, do not give up, do not lose faith—because that heart beating in you is an indication that life means your soul, body, and spirit are here for a purpose. Your very existence here gives God joy, and if you will reach out to the creator of your soul, the one who gave you life, you will find its true meaning and purpose.

In February 2015, we lost our oldest cousin to suicide. We got the news she was fighting for her life. After she drank poison, my heart was shattered. I went on my knees and cried like a baby. I couldn’t pray, I couldn’t eat, all I kept saying to God was, why? I asked, What’s this life for? My cousin was in her fifties and had given up on life. She had faced so many struggles and finally said she didn’t see meaning in her life, so she ended it.

That decision, even though it was for herself, left the entire family heartbroken, a loss which will take us years to recover. She was a sweet, beautiful, and loving woman, yet somehow didn’t find her purpose to continue living. I am here to announce to you your life means a great lot. You are loved and appreciated by the one who created you. Even though my cousin faced so many struggles, the love of God never failed her. It is our inability to be aware of that love that drives us to give up.

I have struggled with depression from sleepless nights to raging thoughts of nobody loving me. I would often drink and drink until I managed to fall asleep from being drunk. I was tired of going through things and sometimes wanted to end it; yet several times, I would hear that still voice telling me it’s going to be all right. But how? Everything looked dark around me. Friends were betraying me. I had no job, no money, and even sometimes no place of my own, but no matter how much I tried to justify why this life meant nothing and had to give up, a messenger always showed up to show me the way. And that was God saying, I am here. I gave you this life for a purpose.

I know you might be going through it right now. Maybe you are a firm believer in Christ and even attend church. You do everything right, yet you constantly face that opposition, whether in your marriage, in your career, in your finances, etc. It is when you see that strong opposition that you know that there’s a greater meaning to your life. Sometimes all I do is surrender that opposition to God, laying it there at the feet of Christ.

I truly believe we are not meant to carry our burdens. It’s not our job to figure everything out. Let God handle it. Let him be the problem solver. Let him comfort you. Let him love you, and embrace the love.

So many times, I have come to a breaking point in my life, whether facing betrayal by someone I trusted or lacking in any area. I simply open my Bible and remind myself how much God loves me, how much he is my provider, and how much he has promised me he will never leave me alone. I dig deeper into incredible stories of Joseph, and that brings me to my knees to trust the creator of my soul, the one who gave me life, to see me through the day.

What is it you are facing right now that makes you question your life and its meaning? Are you breathing? Do you have your soul alive in you? If your spirit is still awake and alive, then life means gold for you.

I place so much value on my life and I teach my kids and those around me to do the same. Just because that man or woman left you doesn’t mean your life is over. Just because you got fired from a job of twenty years or cannot even afford to put food on the table does not mean this life is worth nothing.

As we journey through this earth, I am here to announce to you to expect the struggles. That’s what makes you alive. That’s what makes you human. You are alive because you have something to contribute to this life. That issue that’s eating away at you is your awakening moment to make you realize you are alive.

What a beautiful realization when you become aware of your true life’s meaning and purpose! There will never be another life like this one. You only are to fully grasp this life and believe it means you are a winner. You are victorious. You are more than your problems. In essence, you are life’s true jewel.

In the quiet whisper of your heart, listen to the heart beat. Listen to the life that has meaning. Don’t ever condemn yourself, regardless of what you are facing. My favorite song, which always rings in my ears when I feel so overwhelmed, comes to mind:

You don’t have to worry and don’t be afraid.

There is a friend named Jesus, he wipes your tears away.

And if your heart is troubled just lift your hands and say

I know that I can make it.

I know that I can stand

No matter what may come my way,

My life is in your hands.

I hope that someday you can write your own song or write a book to inspire others of the true meaning of life. I told myself I don’t want anyone writing this for me at my funeral, but I need to share this in my own words so that when this journey here on earth is over, and you pick up my book, there will be no doubt you will understand what my life here on earth meant to me.

You may say, But I don’t believe in God or Christ and I don’t do all this religion stuff. Many of us are on that grand journey to discover ourselves. Look at every guru book on becoming your best self this year and that year and next year. You will find one common problem here. The search for yourself or one’s self has no answer in any of those guru books or workouts or whatever other thing you indulge in to discover yourself. The problem here isn’t religion. The problem is man or woman trying to figure out the meaning of life without God. The problem is you determine in your heart you will make history or achieve everything without God. How can you find yourself when you do not know what life means to you? How can that self even begin to comprehend the magnitude of life when the self has not been awakened to life and what it means?

I attended church traditionally like I was brought up to do. Every Sunday and Wednesday, for so many years, I sat in church and didn’t know the meaning of life. I read my Bible, I prayed and fasted, and still had no knowledge of life. In the next chapter, I will go deeper into the Creator of life and will journey with you in becoming awake to the source of life.

But before we move to the next chapter, let me address this whole religion madness. You have to understand religion is man-made. It is when man in his own carnal, mortal self pushes his idea of God on fellow humans. God never created Catholocisim or Baptist or Pentecostal or Islam or Judaism. You have to understand all he wanted was just a relationship with the source, which is him. No labels or fancy designs attached to it. He gave us his own instruction as to how to worship him, yet we have twisted and perverted something that was so simple—a relationship between you and him. There is no Islam or Christianity or Judaism in God’s kingdom. It’s all man-made. Surprise, surprise. Now that we are clear about this, let’s see how this affects your life’s meaning.

When you understand that the meaning of life is connected to the source of life, then you begin to understand that no religion can dictate to you how you interact with the source, the divine God. Allowing the spirit of God, the Holy Spirit, to have its way in your life can bring you a deeper meaning to life.

On a final note, I deeply hope you will take time to fully engage yourself as to what the meaning of life is, especially in your life, what you believe this life means to you, and how you come to understand the meaning of life in order to tap into your true purpose. As you read the next chapters, I will reveal to you how I was able to find meaning, purpose, and understand why I was given life. This will lead you to desire life in a way you never have before. I want to live, and not just live, but in fulfillment of my purpose and destiny.

2

The True Purpose of Life

I will cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills his purpose for me.

—Psalm 57:2

I had just been introduced to my friend, Liza, through a mutual friend. The first time we met, it was like we knew each other from another life. I felt a bond with her that I had never felt before. We quickly started hanging out. Liza has two young boys, so we would go to the park with them. They would also come over to my place frequently.

One day, I got the most frantic call from Liza, telling me Mathew, her husband, was in a coma after he attempted suicide. What made this situation even more frustrating was Matthew was in another country visiting Liza’s family when this occurred.

This came as a shock because I had just spoken to Mathew two days prior. He had excitement in his voice about doing business and finding partners to start it with. I wished him the best and told him I was looking forward to meeting him when he returned to the US.

Liza had to quickly leave the US and go to this foreign country to find out what the situation was. It was for the best. Matthew’s family quickly put together her travel expenses and sent her away. We were all praying for Matthew to make it, but he never got better.

At last, after he was brought back to the US in a semi-comatose state, he passed away in August 2011. When the news broke, I rushed to the hospital with my mother to be at Liza’s side.

I walked into the room and approached Mathew’s lifeless body. I stepped next to the bed as Liza gave me the go ahead. I spoke to Matthew’s corpse and to God. My heart was broken and shattered, yet I wanted to understand the purpose of this. What was this young man’s purpose here on earth? I was at his bedside, crying and weeping and asking God why Mathew had to die this way and so early. He was only twenty-six years old. Life had just ended for Mathew, and as I was holding his hand, I knew there had to be a God who created a purpose for us to be here. This was beyond tragic. Yet, even in my anger and hopelessness at life and God, I was assured this would bring me meaning to life and enable everyone affected by this tragedy to find their purpose on this earth.

What is purpose? What does it mean to say, I have found my true calling and assignment here on earth? Do we find it? And is it even possible to know and fulfill our true purpose?

I was on my way here to New York to relocate since I felt a strong sense that my life was leading to this place. On the day that Mathew had died, I was on my way to start a new chapter. I had no idea how I was going to make it, but my faith was unshaken, simply because I believed there was a purpose for me to do something with my life, and in order to discover it, I had to move. This reminded me of Abraham and Joseph; for their purpose to be fulfilled their location had to change. And so with Abraham’s migration to a foreign land, things began to unfold.

I deeply understood my purpose to be one that was divinely designed, even before I was born. In Jeremiah, God informs us that, Before you were in your mother’s womb I knew you. How amazing is that? The one who created us has the blueprint for our lives. It is only logical that we always look to him to find out the direction our lives should take.

As a person of faith, I have always looked into God’s word to understand my purpose. So many of us struggle with this all our lives, until our last breath, and still don’t understand what our purpose here is. I truly believe if you and I can comprehend our mission here on earth, then we will serve our purpose.

Moses, remove your sandals, for the land you stand on is a holy one. These are the words that echoed in his ears when Moses had approached the burning bush. He was then introduced to the Great I Am, the creator of man and also things. This encounter was a very crucial point in Moses’ life, because at the age of forty, his purpose was confirmed here. He would go and deliver his people out of the hand of Pharaoh.

But let us go back to the beginning of Moses’ life and see if there were any clues revealing his purpose.

We begin with a child wrapped in a blanket, placed in a basket, and dumped in the Nile river. But not just any part of the river, the only part where Pharaoh’s sister took her daily baths and swam. So Moses is spotted by the queen’s household and brought to the house of Pharaoh. If you are a believer, you know how the story goes and how it began. But let me draw you a picture to enable you to grasp the purpose.

The children of Israel were under slavery and bondage in Egypt. They had cried so many years to God to be delivered. No answer came. Then Moses was born, but the Pharaoh at that time sent out a decree to murder all male babies born to the Hebrew women. What a time to be born! In the midst of so much chaos and suffering, the mother of Moses somehow knew what drastic steps needed to be taken to save her son, Moses. She wrapped that baby, and into the Nile River she dropped the basket carrying her son. You ask yourself, why? Why out of all the places to hide her baby did she choose Pharaoh’s house?

Divine purpose is incredible. When a purpose is ordained by God to serve his purpose, it shall come to pass, no matter the chaos or situations surrendering the person.

Divine purpose can only be aborted when you and I lose faith in our God. For purpose to be revealed and fulfilled, we must align ourselves with the Creator. I truly believe the mother of Moses saw a revelation about her son. I can clearly picture in a night vision God showing her who her son is and how she must hide him to preserve his life. Each one of us has that same access to God’s revelations.

God always will reveal his purpose for your life, even before you are born. This takes me to the life of Samson. The angel came to his mother and again revealed she would have a son: and his name shall be Samson. And this is what his purpose shall be, to deliver his people from their enemies.

Now I want to speak to you about your life. I know you’re saying, I don’t know what my purpose is. Or you have no idea what to do with your life. Or you’re completely lost and have given up. I felt like that when I was done with graduate school and had no job and was waking up every day, asking what I was supposed to do with my life. I was frustrated, depressed, and cried my eyes out daily.

Nothing made sense to me; I saw all my colleagues getting big job offers. I even helped some of them draft their resumes and, as soon as they got that job, didn’t hear from them again. Life without understanding your true purpose can drive you to the edge. I truly believe if you understand what you are meant to be here for, then you will never be worried about others or even yourself. I had to dig into mine to enable me to stay focused and be at peace with my life. That was the only way I could find true meaning to life.

You have to pay attention to your talents. What are you good at? You have to pay attention to your heart, what makes you happy after you have accomplished that task. Most important, what’s burning within your soul that keeps knocking at your heart?

Let me give you an example. I always knew I wanted to serve others. At home or school, it always made me happy to lend a helping hand to a friend or family members. Nothing made me happier than that. So naturally, when a professor in college suggested I attend graduate school for social work, I knew this was where my calling was. But there was more to this calling; within this profession, I discovered a hidden gift, which I never saw before. Maybe like me, you have always ignored it or not paid closed attention to the clues life was always giving you.

Even as a young child, I could see things beyond the natural eye. I could also sense people and their energy whenever they approached. I never understood why. The one that even got me on my knees was being able to feel others’ pain and their struggles. I didn’t know how to handle that, and it was overwhelming.

As a child, I could also see when someone was about to depart this earth. I would encounter that person in my dreams and then see them in their spirit form bidding me goodbye. I never even understood what this meant until I would later hear the person had passed away.

One of these dreams was my awakening moment to what was hidden in me. I woke up from a dream that changed my life. My father had been sick for months, and he was not getting better. I had gone to visit him early that month and promised I would see him soon. In my dream, I saw I visited him again, and he was so sick. But then he asked for me to pray for him. I started laying my hands on him to pray, but then he jumped off the bed. He started shouting and laughing, saying he was healed and free. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Then I woke up.

I felt so sad when I woke up. I didn’t understand. I had just seen my father healed, and yet it brought me no joy. I quickly went and took my shower, then chose to wear black. I was looking for a pair of black earrings to complete my black wear for the day. It dawned on me my auntie, whom I was staying with, should have one. I went into her room and, in her jewelry box, found a pair of black earrings. I immediately put them on and was about to leave her room when she bumped into me. She started yelling and screaming for me to take the earrings off, take my black clothes and slippers off. She was outraged, and I had never seen her like this before. I obeyed and took everything off and got something colorful to wear.

Later on that day, I was on my way to Bible study when a friend approached me. She said, Vera, I’m so sorry for your loss. I heard you lost your dad.

I broke down and started crying. I asked her who said this to her. She said her auntie and people were talking about it. My world shattered into pieces. I had lost my dad, and my auntie couldn’t even tell me. I was furious I had to hear it from someone else. But still, that dream kept ringing in my soul.

I said to myself, Not my dad, not my dad as I ran back home to tell my auntie. She denied it and said it wasn’t true. But I knew she was trying to protect me. I also knew because my mom was in Botswana and didn’t know. They wanted her to hear it first, and then she was supposed to tell me.

The next week, my mom arrived, and it was confirmed my dad had passed. Oh, God why? Why? I was shattered. Why would God take my dad away from me? I needed him and I loved him. How could my life go on without my father? He was my closest friend, and I his darling little girl.

Somehow in the midst of this, my vision or dream revealed to me who I was. My dad had finished his purpose, and mine was just beginning. His life was over, he had taken his last breath, and I was just beginning my journey. How could I imagine it without him? I wanted to die.

This is where my depression started. I completely lost it. At his gravesite, I wanted the grave to open and swallow me up. What is the purpose of this life? So many times, I stood at the side of a loved one who had passed and I kept asking that same question.

Yesterday, January 17, 2017, I stood at the bedside of my client who had just passed, and again I was shattered. No matter how many times I witness the end of life, my soul questions God, asking him to show me life’s purpose.

I knew without a doubt I had a calling to be a seer and a prophetess. No matter how much I shut this out, the visions kept coming. Sometimes I thought I was crazy. I remember when I started sharing some things with my friends and family members. You could have imagined the backlash; I heard all sorts of names from weirdo to crazy.

I was also hearing deeply from God and would share with people things revealed about their lives. They always go, But how did you know?

I quickly tell them, It’s not me but God and the Holy Spirit.

I remember recently this month, I was in fasting and prayers, and the Holy Spirit told me to ask a colleague if she wanted a baby.

I was so scared to ask. That’s kind of personal. I mustered all the confidence in me and asked her.

She said yes.

I asked her, Have you thought about adoption? I said to her, I see a girl, a baby girl. And if she went for the adoption, she would get the baby.

She then opened up to me how she tried before and never followed through with the process.

I said to her, The Lord wants you to go back again and try.

She thanked me, and we ended our conversation.

That went well, and I was grateful, because I had no idea how she was going to handle that information. I’ve always been in tune with the Holy Spirit who speaks and leads me. I wanted to write this book years ago, but my flesh kept putting it away. I will do it this year and next year. The Lord had even sent others to tell me to write the book. Because the body of Christ needs this message, I’m supposed to be traveling around and telling others about God and having a relationship with him, Christ, and the Holy Spirit.

You see, knowing your purpose has a lot to do with your relationship with God. I was so tired of religion, sitting at church every week, yet I didn’t know who God was. I didn’t understand how to access the throne room and have a relationship with the Holy Spirit. Man’s purpose here on earth is to serve God and have a loving relationship with him. This relationship then reflects on how we serve others and how we treat each other here on earth.

If you are a medical doctor, that’s your career. But your calling and purpose is to serve your patients and show them the relationship you have with God. So many times I met people in a profession and walked away saying, God, that man or woman is evil. How could they treat a person like that? However, when we let our personality reflect that of our maker, we begin to serve our purpose.

I remember when I just had my daughter, Esther, and I was going through hell. I was in a homeless shelter, and my husband had been kicked out for not obeying shelter rules. We were both going through hell, he lost his job, and we couldn’t keep up with our rent, so we had to seek shelter while I was seven months pregnant with my daughter.

I had delivered my daughter but needed to be rushed back to the hospital. This was my first baby, and I had no experience as to how to handle myself after getting home. I was getting feverish and was scared I was going to collapse, and with my daughter being only four days old, I panicked and called 911. After I was discharged, I had no means of coming home.

There was a nurse called Nurse Bea; she showed me the heart of God that day. She was about to close her shift, and I informed her I couldn’t go home with my baby because I had no car seat. She told me to wait and would come back to talk to me. She came back to me and informed me her husband would come to pick her up. They could go to the shelter and get the baby’s car seat for me. I couldn’t believe it. Her kindness and her love moved me to tears. After about forty minutes, she was back with the car seat. Then she offered to drop my baby and me home.

Nurse Bea had shown me what a calling is. She also showed me purpose. At this moment, she was serving her purpose. After she and her husband dropped me off, they also handed me food they had bought that would last me from lunch to dinner. I wept.

When this woman one day stands before God, she will know she had served her purpose. Her act of kindness and love, serving me and my baby that day, proved to me we all are here for each other to reveal God. Nurse Bea was a nurse. That’s her profession, but her true purpose was serving others and demonstrating love. The Bible tells us God is love. How else do we know this love? By our very own actions, which makes others pause and say today, I saw the heart of God.

Today, if you feel lost and don’t know what you are supposed to be doing, find someone to bless. Find someone who needs the help and offer a hand. Find someone who is hurting and offer comfort. Find someone hungry and feed them. Find someone homeless and give them shelter. Find someone orphaned and be a parent to them. You will never know the joy it brings your heart when you go out of your comfort zone to reach out to others.

My purpose has always led me to be a problem solver. I know of a couple who wanted a child. They informed me to pray for them after I told them of my gift and how I am an intercessor. So I went before the throne and asked God for a baby for them. I wasn’t even done with my petition when I heard God say, They don’t have sex.

I was like, What? Did I just hear that? So I quickly got up and called my friend. I said to her, Do you have sex with your husband?

She said, No.

I was like, Sorry to intrude, but God said to me you are not having sex and I should tell you. She then went into details about the problems she was having with her husband. I told her, If you want a baby, you have to have sex, period.

So many instances, God will show me information and give me a solution to a problem a friend or family member has. This has been my life now and my purpose. I hope you find yours. Whether serving the homeless or others in need, always remember your true purpose lies within this: even in the midst of your problems and pain and suffering, the best you can do to see God close is to reach within your soul and serve others.

I know you might be saying, I don’t have money or anything to give. Remember your God-given talent has nothing to do with money. You have all the divine resources available to you to serve and so many ways to use that talent.

This reminds me of the parable of the talents Jesus shared with his disciples. In Matthew 25:14–30, a master leaves for a journey, but before he departs, he entrusts three of his servants with talents. To the first, he gave one; the second, two; and the third, three. Upon his return, he discovers two of them have invested well with the talent he gave them and even acquired profits. They happily presented their increase to their master. But the one who had only one talent didn’t invest his talent. He dug a hole and buried it, then gave it back to his master. His reason will amaze you, but many of us do this every day for our entire lives. He didn’t want to lose the one talent he was given and wanted to save it. So he buried it. How many of us are doing that today?

How many of us have said, I’m not qualified enough for that opportunity? Or, I can’t do this and don’t have enough to accomplish such a task. You see, it doesn’t matter whether you are worth billions or zero, the same talent runs within us. God made you and me to have a purpose. He created you with a purpose to be a blessing, not only to yourself, but to others around you as well.

You don’t need the expensive education or perfect situation to fulfill your purpose. Just pay attention to where you are right now. What is it you are good at and love doing, even if you don’t get a reward? What is it you have dreamed of since you were a child? Within your heart and soul lies your purpose. The only way to find it is to go back to the source—God.

You can ask, and he will hear and answer. The answer might not be what you need right now, but it will lead you to your purpose.

When you discover your purpose, you become empowered. You see, when God created this earth, he gave us power and authority and dominion over this earth. As long as he is your source, you are equipped to handle life’s storms and struggles. Nothing shall deny you your divine birthright.

I see so many faith believers or Christians crushed and bombarded with problems, and they forget their true identity, their true purpose, why God gave them breath. You are meant to have purpose with power.

Life comes with a purpose, but that purpose demands you embrace the power that comes with it. When God created you and me with a purpose to live a meaningful life, he ensured that you were innately endowed with power. You have to know your power because God is the source of your strength.

Through his word which empowers us, we know that no weapon formed against you and me shall prosper. A lot of times in my life, I have felt so lost; I have felt so stuck. Nothing was working or moving, no matter how much effort I put into it. As I’m writing these words, I don’t have anything figured out. I’m scared, and I can’t see where this is all going. Life can be a scary journey to embark on when you are fulfilling your purpose. Sometimes you wish things would fall into place for you and you could just relax.

I sometimes am even scared to sleep, so I lay on the floor, talking to God about my fears. That’s where I take all my frustrations. Why do I feel powerless? I think I’m walking in my purpose, yet I feel so powerless.

I truly believe we must understand that our purpose comes with power, which demands that we cause or create impacts wherever we find ourselves. But first, we must understand the source of that power and how to claim it and work with it.

Psalm 91:1 (KJV) says, He that dwells in the secret place of the most high, shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. Whenever I read this psalm, it always reminds me of my purpose. I am reminded that only the Almighty