Split P Soup: Book 5: Whaddaya Know?

By Maharg Ydobon

Short interviews about education from the perspectives of students, teachers, administrators, rebels, and conformists. Humor and theory in a nutshell -- as if told to a shrink. New-age hippy, Justin Blackadder, gets his teaching credentials and is immediately immersed in the job of teaching the worst troublemaker class in the school district.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Maharg Ydobon
• Release date: Jan 26, 2023
• ISBN: 9798215847497

Maharg Ydobon

Bio Info for Maharg YdobonAge = Old; birthdate lost in ancient history and political disruptions. Maybe he was born soon after WW2 somewhere in a now dislocated jurisdiction, possibly Europe or South America or somewhere else. But, it seems he must have been in elementary school in the early 1960s. He claims to have been in anti-war and civil rights protests during the Nixon years.Ethnicity = Other; has ties to various ethnicities and claims allegiance to none of them. Claims to have come from "the old world", and that most of the Ydobon family didn't choose to come to this backwater planet... (Maybe there will be something of this vein in future books?)Language = Spanglish (border mixture of Spanish & English) and BuHdobyan (huh?), but his first language is "ba-baba-baby-talk..."Family = Multiple members of extended family, many of whom are now deceased. Favorite Auntie just passed away in her late eighties. Mama died at the same age a few years ago. Some brothers are still in contact, and through them are many nephews and nieces. Heck, life goes on and you lose some and gain some and it all comes out "even steven" - except when it doesn't.Work = Various Jobs & Businesses."The first regular job I remember was walking bean fields in the brutal heat and humidity of the Mississippi River Valley, hoeing out all of the weeds while being careful to protect the plants. Yeah, I made a whopping 65 cents an hour for that menial labor."Over the years there have been many jobs and businesses. Gradually the pay got better as did the amount of control I had over my life."Recently a client told me my rates were way too low for the market, and that I should increase my base rate (for just showing up and not doing any real work) to more than double. I considered that absurd, but increased my hourly rate (including work) by about 20 percent."Reality Check! My rates haven't really gone up that much. Our economy is in such a mess that our dollars are becoming worthless, and you have to get a lot more of them to buy the basic stuff that most people need. That's called 'transitory inflation', and has been going on for hundreds of years..."So, somebody's $100 per hour rate now is maybe equivalent to a wage of $10 an hour back when I was growing up. Okay, that was a living wage for a seasoned technician. You could support a family on that if you were frugal."Frugal is one thing I have been all my life. As Uncle Harveigh says, 'There's no sense spending senselessly on senseless extravagances. Going into debt for non-essential spending is even worse. It's all just senseless.'""So, if you have any sense, mind your dollars and cents."Sorry, I got off track there -- maybe starting to show my age. Financial stupidity is one of my pet peeves."There are many other things of importance about me, but not all is relevant here...."I do enjoy woodworking and creative art. My workshop is outdoors, but shaded, with big trees and a shade canopy, and surround-sound organic birdsong music all day long."One of my best buddies out there is a large Wood Bee (aka Carpenter Bee) who hangs around and talks to me in Buzzlish. He (or maybe she; most of nature seems to be non-binary when it comes to gender) looks a lot like a Bumblebee, except for being all black. Unlike its cousins, Wood Bees are very mellow and don't attack or sting unless they are threatened. It would be nice if more people were like that."

Book preview

Split P Soup

Book 5: Whaddaya Know?

Pseudo-science Fiction

Maharg Ydobon, PsZ

Psycho-babbling, Rumors, Gossip, Conspiracy, and Deep Dark Secrets

Insights inside inner selves and twisted minds

Neurotic, Psychotic, Sociopathic, and just plain weird

Twisted stories of insane stuff -- as if told to a shrink

May be mentally disturbing...

Read at your own risk!

Copyright 2002 - 2022 Philosophers Stone Tablets

Published by Philosophers Stone Tablets at Smashwords

Philosophers Stone Tablets is Trademark protected

The names Philosophers Stone Tablets, Split P Soup, Maharg Ydobon,

and other names are protected by Trademarks and/or Copyrights

Split P Soup -- Book 5:

Whaddaya Know?

Table of Contents

Prologues to Whaddaya Know?

Freedom Learning lecture to Educational Excellence Program

What do we know, and how do we know it?

Interviews

1. What is education, and how does it relate to schooling?

2. Drop Out - Pioneer Instead of going to College

3. That Smart Studious Kid

4. Education could use a lot of improvement, but how can it be done?

5. Life on the Road - Malissioneries & Hobo Soup

6. Rights & Privileges - What Do Us Losers Really Got?

7. Working Hard and Learning to Survive in Harsh Conditions

8. Education & Educational Stuff

9. Make Love Not War!

10. The Justice System is like Sports; Courts are Courts

11. New Town, New School - What else is new?

12. Mom's Projects Get Passed To Me

13. Reconciling Past & Future

14. Vic, What a Great Guy

15. Business Ed, Partying, & Fraternity

16. Heavenly Tranquility is a Mountain Hike

17. We missed out on college; it's my fault and I feel so bad...

18. Life on the road

19. Growing up -- or what?

20. Pledge Life at the Frat

21. Taunting Buford

22. Adventures on the Road; My Friend Geronimo

23. Examples of What Teachers Have to Deal With

24. Getting Robbed and Getting Revenge = Serious Trouble

25. Who Me? Ya gotta be kiddin'!

26. Intramural Soccer -- The Crazy 8s

27. Frat Wars -- Pledge Class Uprisings

28. Fraternity, Brotherhood, a Society of Leaders

29. Axles Need Lube; Don't Pump the Oil Out of the Earth's Axis

30. Professional Educator Interviews & Stuff

31. Horseman School's Troublemaker Class

32. Creating a Band, Choosing a Manager

33. First Year Teacher! Oh, my, my...

34. Whoah! Cool New Teacher! This Can't Last, Can It?

35. Confab in the Teachers' Lounge

36. Confrontation at The Stab

37. Education, Gossip & Teaching

38. Teacher of the Year

39. Group Home Management

40. Mistake I should've known better than to make...

41. I pitched a no-hitter! Then the coach pulled me in the sixth inning!

42. You won't believe this, Doc! My bro's a country star!

43. Really Cool Science Study Group

44. Whatever is going on?

45. Analyzing Factoids: JUST PLAIN NEAT INFORMATION

46. Taunting Buford

47. Motivation

48. Those Kids Kicked Me Out Of Their Science Club

49. School Integration in Bugger County 1946

50. Twins & Triplets

51. Plagiarism? Or the reverse? Pray tell?

What does time mean to time travelers? Whaddaya know?

*****

Literary Works by Maharg Ydobon

About The Author

Prologues to Whaddaya Know?

Freedom Learning lecture to Educational Excellence Program graduate students at Great River University - Spring Quarter 1974

Maharg Ydobon, PsZ, talking

Thank you for that polite applause. It was totally fitting for an esteemed lecturer in a school of higher education. I appreciate it, but I must admit that I am not an esteemed lecturer. In fact, I don't have the prerequisites to get into this class. I never finished my undergrad work and didn't get any degree.

Of course, like everybody else I was born with a BA, which was promptly spanked by the doctor and diapered by the nurse. When I was thirteen I received a PHD from my grandpa, which I was then required to use to dig post holes for the fence around the back forty. Yeah, a post-hole-digger can sure raise some nasty blisters on your hands.

Of course, you are all looking forward to PhDs that assure you a life free of hard work and blisters. Good luck with that. The job, and life, that looks easy and glorious from the outside is generally full of worries and hardships for the person living it. So, prepare yourselves to struggle -- whatever you do. Life is a struggle for most of the critters on this planet.

You don't need to write that down. There won't be a test on any of this. These are just thoughts about reality for you to keep in the back of your minds, and remember when times get tough.

I look out there and see that the whole lot of you are serious, studious, intent, and conscientious future educators. You all sit there quietly concentrating on the lecture with proper decorum and respect for an educational institution -- except for that guy in the back smoking a bong. Is he even supposed to be here?

Ah-hah! Finally I got your attention for real. You all turned to see who would dare to smoke a bong in class. But, it isn't a fellow student. That's Mac, the lecturer for the second half of this presentation. His bong isn't loaded, it's just for show, to make a point and get everybody to relax and get a little less serious.

After seventeen or more years of educational training it is expected that you would all be acclimatized to scholarly decorum. Hundreds of hours of studying educational theory, administration, psychology, sociology, class management, along with all of your core classes, and the training you received before college, has developed a learning attitude that is consistent with where you are in your studies and life. It's like you are all in a trance, like somebody cast a spell over you all, and that doing anything that would be seen as not normal is now almost impossible for you -- at least in an academic setting. I won't get into the wild things y'all do to unwind when you get out of your super-studious model. But, right now you are all under the spell, just like I was when I was an undergrad right here.

Now, to break that spell for a while, let's all stand up, turn around, jump up and down, and give a radical rock concert cheer for Mac and his bong! Go ahead. Feel the freedom of jumping for joy and cheering wildly. Pretend your favorite team just scored a touchdown!

Hey! That was great! That's what a cheer should sound like.

And how does that make you feel? Do you feel more awake, more alive, and more alert than when you sat down here this evening? Of course you do.

That feeling actually puts you in a better condition for learning. The exuberance you feel running through your bodies actually activates neurons in your nervous system, including your brain. The increased blood flow feeds the brain and allows it to function at a higher frequency. Right now you can feel the difference. But, do we have empirical data, evidence, or scientific proof of this phenomenon? Sadly, we do not have it -- not yet.

Studies will certainly prove this out over the next few decades, and some of you could get your PhDs by doing research and thesis papers on the effects of exercise, exuberance, and positive thinking on the functions of learning.

As to the practical uses in the classroom, there are multiple examples of teachers who use this concept to motivate their students to educational excellence. Many of the most successful teachers, in terms of students' learning-skill improvement, standardized test results, and teacher appreciation, credit their classroom success with their ability to make learning fun.

Likewise, when highly successful individuals are asked about their learning experiences that got them to their positions, they almost always talk about that special teacher who motivated them and made learning fun.

Obviously, most of you have benefitted from such an experience or you wouldn't have spent all these years studying to work in the education field. You aren't here because you want yachts and private planes, big mansions, or lots of servants. Your motivation isn't that you will be respected and revered and powerful on the world stage. You are here because somebody motivated you to want to teach, and to want to help students to learn.

But, along the way, during all those long hours of note-taking, reading, writing, and listening to lectures, many of you have forgotten how to experience the exuberance of learning. That makes it more difficult for you to become that highly motivating teacher or administrator that you aspire to be. We have to get rid of the stuffy stuff that impairs learning in order to become the effective teachers that we strive to be.

Hey! Stop focusing on the lecture and get back to enjoying the learning experience. Give another cheer, this time for your own break with the stuffy stuff and your embrace of the exuberance of Freedom Learning! Go ahead, cheer!

That was pretty good, but many of you are still in the attitude of scholarly decorum, basically sitting quietly and taking notes.

Frankly, sitting still while listening quietly and taking notes is not an efficient or effective method of learning. I know that goes against most of what you have been taught in high school and college. It sounds like heresy, but it is true.

Future learning will be quite different. You have the opportunity to be part of the forefront of a wave of freer, more stimulating, and more effective teaching. Think for a few moments on how this can affect your future career, and what you can do to spread the message of Freedom Learning. And get ready to have some fun!

Now, I have a little exercise for us all.

Breathe in deeply. Experience peace, and contentment, and joy. Remember that special grade-school teacher that was so motivating. Consider giving such motivation to your future students. Prepare yourselves to spread enthusiasm.

Now, stand up, get ready to go out for a break. But this isn't just any break. This is an exuberance exercise. We're going to run out the back doors, following Mac. Dance and jump and cheer as you exit. Take the excitement into the hallway, out the main doors, and across the grassy knoll through the Free Speech Area to the Student Union. Make your exuberance felt to everybody out there.

Scream hallelujah -- we're free!, we're having fun!, teach with excitement!, down with boring -- up with joy!, FREEDOM LEARNING!, and whatever other slogans you come up with. Create a scene. Shake up everybody. Grab attention. Hug people. And most importantly, have fun doing it! Okay, let's go!

What do we know, and how do we know it?

What do students need to learn, and how do we teach it?

Distinguished Eminent Educator talking

First, let me start by asserting that most people do not actually know the things they claim to know. Most people genuinely believe the things they claim to know. But, believing is not the same as knowing. Belief is based on faith. Knowledge is based on scientific evidence and understanding.

The commonly understood definitions of know -- and there are many and varied definitions, the majority of which are mostly nonsense, gibberish, and without real meaning -- include claiming to know things that are unknown, unproven, and often false.

I know that because my teacher taught it to me... or I know this because I saw it on TV... or Everybody knows that the earth is round (or flat, or full of people, or some other nonsense)... or Of course we all know that da-de-dot-dot-dot is true... are all fallacious statements on their surface, because those beliefs, backed up by little data and no actual knowledge, do not equate to knowing something for a fact.

Most of the things that are asserted as facts are in fact just beliefs. They may be well-established beliefs, backed up by public opinion, quoted from so-called experts, or sworn to under oath. None of those things make them facts, and believing them is not the same as knowing.

To really know something requires a lot of examination of the evidence, proving the theorems in various scenarios, and making sure that all of the facts of that knowledge base are in fact, true facts. And, it is important to double check to make sure that the facts relied on are relevant to the knowledge. That's the way to actually know something.

Obviously, most people do not have the time or concentration required to really know things. They don't study the subjects deeply enough to have real proof. They can't discern whether the sources they rely on have conflicts of interest, are reliable, or are unreliable.

So, the world goes on using the term know as if everybody really knows what they say they know. Of course, that isn't true. But, as scientists, we just put up with it, because it is generally just too much trouble to really know all of the facts, or to respond to all of the misinformation being touted as knowledge.

Yet, we are faced with the challenge of teaching students all of the things they need to know. How is that possible? How can we meet such a challenge?

Of course we can't meet it, but we all try in our own ways. Some educators are more successful than others, as measured against standardized test data.

But, it has been argued that the standardized tests are a poor measurement of real learning. They are, obviously, always a decade behind the advancement of civilization, so they measure today's students by outdated standards of learning. There are a lot of other things wrong with those tests, but if you want that story you'll have to take my MsEd 606 class. There, we go into mass testing, and its massive failures, in depth.

Unfortunately for me and my class, most education professionals who would qualify to take the class already consider themselves experts on the subject. So, most of them keep making the same mistakes, too.

Let's try a little experiment here. What do you really know? (points his finger at an eager student in the front row).

I know that children need to be taught in order to learn, replied the bright-eyed teacher-to-be. They need guidance from well-trained educators in order to survive and thrive and succeed in the world.

Thank you for that sincere belief. But, is it knowledge? How do you know that such a belief system is truly factual?

Frankly, I doubt you could prove it. In fact, I know of a lot of data that contradicts that factoid. Even though it is considered sacrosanct in the educational bureaucracy, there is no empirical evidence to prove that children need to be taught in order to learn taking the first part of your hypothesis.

Children learn, with or without teachers. Children are programmed from birth to learn. They will learn despite any hindrances. Those are biologically proven facts. The second assumption, that well-trained educators are better able to teach survival and success, is subject to debate.

The definition of well-trained is varied. Of course, the education establishment wants that to equate to those trained formally under the establishment, with appropriate degrees of mastery of the so-called science of education. But, in the real world, it is often the so-called uneducated teachers, parents, and mentors who perform the best.

Unfortunately for the real world, the classroom teachers and the curriculum specialists are tasked with teaching students to do well on the standardized tests. Forward-thinking learning experiences are discouraged because they would be taking time away from so-called essential learning.

Think deeply about that. How will you respond to the challenge? There are a lot of options that are used on a daily basis in the education community. Some work well. Some don't work at all. Some are actually harmful to the students and hinder their learning ability.

Fortunately, we have transformed from the time when just physically hitting non-performing students was considered the best way to encourage them. I survived such assaults and managed to achieve a level of learning success greater than those assault-based administrators could imagine. I achieved it despite their aggressive interference -- not because of it! Others have done the same.

Likewise, in today's educational environment