Book of Lists

By Carol Pack and Barbara Paskoff

As we get older, time seems to pass more quickly, so
getting to the point is more important than ever. That’s
why we love bullet points. What’s quicker than reading
a list of specifics without a bunch of long-winded
explanations to annoy us or slow us down? Okay,
maybe we’re a little more impatient than we used to be,
but after surviving wars, a pandemic, inflation, a toilet
paper shortage, prevaricating politicians, and the roller
coaster known as the stock market, we have a right to
be touchy. That’s why we wrote the Over-Sixty: Shades
of Gray Book of Lists.
It has answers to questions you never knew you had.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Over-Sixty: Shades of Gray LLC
• Release date: Oct 25, 2022
• ISBN: 9781970028126

Book preview

No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic, digital, or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, contact the publisher with Attention: Permissions Coordinator in the subject line.

ARTIQUA PRESS

www.artiquapress.com

October 25, 2022

BOOK OF LISTS

Copyright © 2022 Carol Pack & Barbara Paskoff

All rights reserved.

ISBN-13: 978-1-970028-12-6

Contents

FOREWORD

APPEARANCE

List No. 1: FRUMPY IS NOT TRENDING

List No. 2: BEAUTY HAS NO EXPIRATION DATE

List No. 3 HERE’S LOOKING AT YOU, KID

List No. 4: WHAT WATTLE?

List No. 5: LET A SMILE BE YOUR UMBRELLA

List No. 6: TWENTY-SIX SIGNS YOU’RE GETTING OLDER

List No. 7: MY MIRROR IS FAT

List No. 8: HAIR TODAY, GONE TOMORROW

List No. 9: NAILING IT

AGEISM

List No. 10: AGEIST BEHAVIORS

List No. 11: FIFTEEN STEPS YOU CAN TAKE TO PREVENT AGEISM

List No. 12: HOW TO RESPOND TO AGEIST REMARKS

ATTITUDE

List No. 13: ACCEPTING THE UNACCEPTABLE… AGING

List No. 14: FAMOUS FEMALE FIRSTS

List No. 15: STOP TAKING YOURSELF SO SERIOUSLY

List No. 16: TEN BEST THINGS ABOUT AGING

List No. 17: TEN WORST THINGS ABOUT AGING

List No. 18: LET’S REALLY TALK

List No. 19: MEN OF A CERTAIN AGE

List No. 20: SAY THIS, NOT THAT

List No. 21: REMEMBER ETIQUETTE?

List No. 22: THOSE WERE THE DAYS

CLASSICAL GAS

List No. 23: 15 FUN FACTS ABOUT FARTING

List No. 24: BEHOLD THE BURP

FITNESS

List No. 25: THE KEY TO THE FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH

List No. 26: DEALING WITH TWO-WHEELING

List No. 27: FIVE TO STAY ALIVE

List No. 28: LET’S DANCE

List No. 29: I USED TO BE ABLE TO SMELL MY FEET

JUST FOR THE HEALTH OF IT

List No. 30: NINE WAYS TO PREPARE FOR YOUR DOCTOR VISIT

List No. 31: BUILDING A DOCTOR-PATIENT RELATIONSHIP

List No. 32: QUESTIONS TO ASK YOUR PHARMACIST

List No. 33: TWELVE WAYS TO FIGHT STICKY SNOT & PHLEGM

List No. 34: WHAT TO PUT ON YOUR MEDICAL ID JEWELRY

List No. 35: HIS AND HER DOWN THERE CARE

List No. 36: THINGS THAT HELP YOU POOP

List No. 37: A REAL PAIN IN THE ASS

List No. 38: WHEN YOUR NOSE DRIPS LIKE A LEAKY FAUCET

List No. 39: WHAT TO PACK FOR A HOSPITAL STAY

List No. 40: A BOWEL MOVEMENT IS NOT A SYMPHONY

List No. 41: SO, YOU THINK YOU MIGHT BE A HYPOCHONDRIAC?

List No. 42: NEW DOC? QUESTIONS YOU NEED TO ASK

List No. 43: WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR FRIENDS SAY YOU’RE FLAKY

List No. 44: KEEP YOUR TEETH

THE LIGHTS ARE ON, BUT…

List No. 45: SEVENTEEN WAYS TO IMPROVE MENTAL HEALTH

List No. 46: SIX BEHAVIORS THAT PROMOTE POSITIVE AGING

List No. 47: SIMPLE WAYS TO MANAGE STRESS

List No. 48: WHAT WAS I THINKING?

List No. 49: I’M SO CONFUSED

List No. 50: BATTLING FORGETFULNESS

MEDIC-EASY

List No. 51: SEVEN THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT MEDICAID

List No. 52: WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT MEDICARE

List No. 53: THIRTEEN INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT SOCIAL SECURITY

PACKING IT IN

List No. 54: FUNERAL FAUX PAS?

List No. 55: DYING TO KNOW ABOUT FUNERALS

List No. 56: TWICE DEAD

List No. 57: MY CASKET LOOK WISH LIST

POTPOURRI

List No. 58: FIFTEEN THINGS THEY RARELY TELL YOU ABOUT AGING

List No. 59: WHAT THE STARS SAY ABOUT YOU

List No. 60: LATE BLOOMERS AND WE’RE NOT TALKING UNDERGARMENTS

List No. 61: DOWNSIZING YOUR HOME

List No. 62: DECLUTTERING YOUR HOUSE

List No. 63: ME CASA? NEW CASA?

List No. 64: SENIOR STONERS

List No. 65: WHAT TO DO IF YOUR PASSWORDS ARE COMPROMISED

List No. 66: REGULAR PEOPLE DOING AMAZING THINGS AFTER 60

List No. 67: WHY THE OLD WHORE MOANED

PRODUCTIVITY

List No. 68: YOU’RE RETIRED. NOW WHAT?

List No. 69: TWELVE WAYS TO FIGHT BOREDOM

List No. 70: PROCRASTINATION PARALYSIS

List No. 71: PICTURE THIS

RELATIONSHIPS

List No. 72: I DO. I DID. I’M DONE. RELATIONSHIP DEAL BREAKERS

List No. 73: HOW TO MAKE YOUR MARK WITHOUT A SHARPIE

List No. 74: APHRODISIACS

List No. 75: SENIORS HELPING SENIORS

List No. 76: YOU’RE PISSED, NOW WHAT?

List No. 77: THERE’S NOTHING LIKE BEING A GRANDPARENT

List No. 78: TEAMWORK!

List No. 79: FIVE TIPS TO GET YOU THROUGH THE HOLIDAYS

List No. 80: WHEN YOUR BACK GOES OUT MORE OFTEN THAN YOU DO

SAFETY

List No. 81: NINE NIFTY GADGETS & GIZMOS

List No. 82: TWENTY-TWO TERRIFIC TIPS FOR AGING IN PLACE

List No. 83: MUST HAVES FOR YOUR FIRST AID KIT

List No. 84: WHAT TO PACK IN A DISASTER PREPAREDNESS KIT

List No. 85: PREVENTING FALLS

SELF AWARENESS

List No. 86: I SMELL OLD

List No. 87: WHY AM I MOVING SO SLOWLY?

SEX AFTER SIXTY

List No. 88: REASONS WHY YOU’VE LOST THAT LOVING FEELING

List No. 89: SEX TOYS

List No. 90: TEN WAYS TO RE-IGNITE PASSION

List No. 91: AVOIDING SEX WITHOUT OFFENDING YOUR PARTNER

List No. 92: WOMANSPLAINING…

List No. 93: SIX WAYS TO SATISFY YOURSELF SEXUALLY

SHOW ME THE MONEY

List No. 94: REVERSE MORTGAGE PROS & CONS

List No. 95: FIVE FINANCIAL FIXES FOR SENIORS

List No. 96: SENIOR SCAMS

THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT

List No. 97: AND THE TONY GOES TO…

List No. 98: FOURTEEN BOOKS WITH OLDER PROTAGONISTS

List No. 99: RADIO PODCASTS GEARED TOWARD OLDER PEOPLE

List No. 100: AND THE BEST DIRECTOR OSCAR GOES TO…

List No. 101: FIFTEEN TV SHOWS THAT FEATURE OLDER PEOPLE

List No. 102: GAMES PEOPLE PLAY

List No. 103: TRAVEL VIRTUOSITY

List No. 104: BEFORE YOU GO GLOBETROTTING

List No. 105: PICKY PACKING PERFECTION

List No. 106: ON THE RUN TRAVEL TIPS

List No. 107: YOU’RE DRIVING ME CRAZY!

IN CLOSING

List No. 108: SAYING GOODBYE IN ELEVEN LANGUAGES

List No. 109: IN GRATITUDE

ABOUT THE AUTHORS

FOREWORD

List

noun

plural noun: lists

1. a number of connected items or names written or printed consecutively, typically one below the other.

According to scientific theory, the faster you move through space, the slower time passes.

So, it’s just our luck (and yes, we’re being facetious) that now that we’re over sixty, we’ve started to slow down—not by choice—and time is whizzing by. The phrase, So much to do, so little time, feels appropriate here.

Now if you’re anything like us, growing older makes you a bit more impatient, and one of the things you may no longer wish to wade through is a long article promising precious information that could be delivered in a lot less time if the writer used bullet points.

So, here’s what this book is about:

• Pertinent information

• Shortened to its essence

• On various subjects

Not to mention:

• Cartoons

• Quotes

• Our own, inimitable, funny little asides

Always.

Need we say more?

APPEARANCE

You’re only as good as your last haircut.

—Fran Lebowitz

List No. 1

FRUMPY IS NOT TRENDING

There are fashion DOs, and there are fashion DOO-DOOs:

• Do wear colors.

• Do tailor your clothing—make your tailor your friend.

• Do wear your skirts and dresses at knee length. Many years ago, we used to call a tight-fitting skirt a sheath; now, it’s called a pencil skirt. Very flattering. I also like the wrap dress. It looks amazing no matter what body type wears it.

• Do look for great-fitting jeans. If you have a tummy like me, try shapewear jeans.

• Do buy a neutral color blazer or jacket that will go with slacks and jeans.

• Do purchase some tank tops. Who doesn’t like a tank (not the kind that would use to mow down your neighbor’s favorite magnolia tree)? These tanks go under the blazer you bought.

• Do keep your accessories at a minimum. When it comes to jewelry—less is more.

• Do wear well-fitting undergarments. You may need