Cradle 2 Grave

By Esme Morgan Smithson

Real Life Mamma Mia Story although it is a heart wrenching tale of how bad people have treat a single mother that was trying to protect an innocent baby / daughter

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse UK
• Release date: May 18, 2022
• ISBN: 9781665598552

Book preview

CRADLE 2

GRAVE

ESME MORGAN SMITHSON

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AuthorHouse™ UK

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403 USA

www.authorhouse.co.uk

Phone: UK TFN: 0800 0148641 (Toll Free inside the UK)

UK Local: (02) 0369 56322 ([phone] from outside the UK)

© 2022 Esme Morgan Smithson. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 07/12/2022

ISBN: 978-1-6655-9854-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-6655-9855-2 (e)

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Acknowledgements

Prologue

Chapter 1Cradle (1971 – 1972)

Chapter 2Living in Poverty (1973 – 1974)

Chapter 3My Old / New & Extended Family (1975)

Chapter 4Oldtown School (1976 – 1981)

Chapter 5Comprehensive School (1982 – 1987)

Chapter 6Youth Training Scheme (1987 - 1988)

Chapter 7UK Electrical Engineering Company (1988 – 1993)

Chapter 8The Birth of Maribeth (1994)

Chapter 9Engineering Power Group (1994 – 1999)

Chapter 10Technology UK (1999 – 2006)

Chapter 11The Birth of Penelope Kent (26/04/2006)

Chapter 12Sintrone (2006 – 2014)

Chapter 13Unemployed (2014 – 2015)

Chapter 14RR Connections Limited (2015 – 2022)

Chapter 15William Harvey – Mental Hospital

Chapter 16Canterbury Mental Hospital

Chapter 17Tunbridge Wells - Mental Hospital

Epilogue

Appendix A

Appendix B

Appendix C

Appendix D

Appendix E

Appendix F

Synonyms

"IN LOVING MEMORY OF MY BABY NIECE;

LAURIE & COUSIN; CRAIG."

With the Deepest Sympathy & Loving Condolences ever known to Man or Womankind the Remembrance of our two Angels who are in Heaven!!!

With the Special Godfather; Lusher Love

Esme

Cradle 2 Grave

40% British

15% Rwandan

5% American

40% German

100% B.R.A.G.

World Drinks & Food

The Basic Needs for our Babies

This book is

dedicated to

Miss Maribeth

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

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I, Esme Morgan Smithson started preparing to write this book in 2018 when I was in a Mental Health Hospital. Due to my previous busy lifestyle with a day Job as a Commercial Officer then changing jobs to a Payroll Officer, I have been unable to put pen to paper.

I Graduated in 2010 from Canterbury Christchurch University, my evening job had been as a Business Management Consultant for my Company; One World, which failed, due to not having the sufficient funding.

After finally having a little bit of disposal income, I am now the Director of The One Earth UK (Limited).

I have had to file loads and loads of paperwork, although I am gutted that some of the important information / evidence has been destroyed, I am now in a position to finish my book; ‘Cradle 2 Grave’.

I showed my Prologue to my oldest Sister; Alicea in January 2020 and she seemed amazed / astonished. Unfortunately, I started feeling suicidal / rock bottom again in February 2020. The Police turned up at my door to check up on me after being concerned because I had contacted them in an emotional state due to not seeing my daughter’s. I showed one of the Officers the first few pages of my manuscript and he told me to keep on writing.

Finally on the 17th April 2020, I researched the necessary steps to have my story published. Searching through the internet, the Google Search found a Company called AuthorHouse and within an hour I received a call back from a lovely lad named Boyd, fantastically, he was very intrigued about my Life Story. A deal was made the same day and the rest is history.

I would like to thank everyone that has been a part of my life, mainly my Family / True Friends with the exceptions of all of the Negative Nasty People (For Example – N.N.P.’s & TROLLS) that I have been very unfortunate to meet.

EVIL PEOPLE ARE

AMONGST US!!!

PROLOGUE

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‘You are Pregnant,’ the Doctor explained.

I sat in Silence, totally numb and completely shocked.

Due to the fact that I had saved my Virginity until I was 22 Years Old & had only been sexually active on one and half occasions.

Literally, speaking; ‘Wham Bam, Thank You Man!’

‘Thank you Doctor!,’ I said, as I was leaving his office.

Every Emotion was going through my head, let alone the changes in my body.

How was I going to tell Work? was one of my concerns. I knew my Mother and Stepfather would be supportive, although they were very overprotective.

The main obstacle I had to overcome was how I tell the Father of my unborn child and even more distressing, ‘Who Is the Daddy???’ 54920.png

Suspect Number One – Harry Williams (My Ex Long-term Boyfriend)

Suspect Number Two – Jackson (The ‘B’ from the ‘V’)

This is a True-Life Mamma Mia Story!

No Bullshit!

The Truth & Nothing but the Truth –

So Help Me God!

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Chapter 1

CRADLE (1971 – 1972)

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I was born on the 4th of September 1971 at Thanet Hospital, my

parents named me Esme Morgan Smithson, (Sex: Female).

Esme

The name Esme is a girl’s name of French, Persian origin meaning beloved.

Esmé comes from the past participle of the Old French verb Esmer, meaning to esteem or to love. It can also be considered a derivative of the Spanish name Esmeralda, which means Emerald.

Morgan

Morgan is a unisex Celtic name, more specifically of Welsh and Breton origin. ... The female version of the first name likely finds its origins with Morrígan which is derived from the Irish Mór Ríoghain and which means Great Queen.

My mother, Vicky Aiken, was born in Brighton, East Sussex, her maiden surname was Aiken. She was a stunning looking lady with long brown / black hair, slim built and was approximately 5 foot 10 inches. She was beautiful on the outside & most of all, on the inside, she had with a great personality and a wonderful Mother/Mam.

Vicky

A short form of Victoria.

Other Forms: Vic, Vick, Vickie.

Victoria

From the Latin, ‘Victory’. Extremely popular following the reign of Queen Victoria. The name has become very fashionable again.

Aiken

The family history of the ancient name Aiken was found in the irishsurnames.com archives. Meaning ‘the son of Adam’, Aiken is a baptismal name of great antiquity taken from the Bible.

VARIANTS INCLUDE: Adkin, Adkins, Adkinson, Atkin, Atkins, Atkyns, Adkisson, Aitken, Aitkin and Aitkins

On the other hand, my Biological Father Cedric Henry Smithson, place of birth Leeds, West Yorkshire; his occupation was an Electrician.

Cedric

From the Celtic, ‘model of generosity’. It is the name of a character in Sir Walter Scott’s novel Ivanhoe and also of the boy in the Little Lord Fauntleroy.

Short Forms: Cad, Cerdic, Rick, Ricky.

Henry

From the Old German, ‘home ruler’.

The name has been a favourite for English kings

SHORT FORMS: Ha, Hank, Harry.

Smithson

The origin of the surname Smithson is rooted in the ancient Anglo-Saxon culture. This was originally a name for someone who worked as a person who was the son of the smith.

"The Smith in olden Times was a very important personage, as being the maker of armour and weapons and since the trade, like others in that day, descended from Father to Son, its designation would soon become used as a Surname.

Before my mother met my father, she left school and began working in a factory as a Machinist but left after a few weeks because she did not like it.

Then she got a job working in a Fruit and Vegetable shop and she was literally running the place for a married couple. The shop eventually closed so my mother applied for a job at the co-operative store near to where she lived with her Parents.

My Mother got the job due to her very impressive arithmetic skills. She also had a Saturday job working at the Polo Social Club and that is how my Parents met and created a ………….‘Legend!’

My Mother; Vicky and Father; Cedric also had an older daughter named Alicea (My Big Sister) who is a year, one week & one day older than me.

Alicea

A Variation of Alice.

Alice

From the German ‘noble’, it was originally Adelice or Adelise. This became very popular in the 19th century after ‘Alice in Wonderland’, when this was published by Lewis Carroll.

When my mother was giving birth to me and also my sister, my father was nowhere to be seen because he was having an affair with another woman / women. Finally, Cedric absconded when I was about One Year Old & my Sister Alicea was Two Years Old. He left my mother in a lot of debt, for example five months behind on the Mortgage Payments and Utility Bills etc.

My Mother doesn’t like talking about my biological Father although she has since told me that he used to go ballistic if we went in front of the Television and she had to sit us down next to her. She suffered domestic violence from him when she was heavily pregnant with me. My Mother also told me that when he got paid cash in hand back in the day, my father would tell her that he had lost his wage packet.

Literally speaking as far as I am concerned,

‘This man should never have been graced with two beautiful daughters and that he had no time for his own children and that he only thought about himself!’

‘Bloody Arsehole!’

‘Sheep Shagger!?’

‘Talk about Infidelity!’

‘Wet Hand / Alcoholic!’

My Biological Father Cedric was supposed to be very spoilt as a Child due to being the one and only baby / Son of Harry Smithson (my Real Grandfather). My Mother referred to her Father-In-Law Harry as being a kind and nice man and that helped her when his son absconded.

My Biological Fathers Mother, Florence, nicknamed by my mother and otherwise known as Fanny Touché was a very antiquated old Woman. Every time my mother took us to visit her, I was always heartbroken by her actions. Our Grandmother had her favourite and that was my oldest Sister Alicea. For Birthdays, Christmases and pocket money my older Sister would always get bigger & better presents.

(For example – My Sister Alicea would get a big doll and mine would be little doll, she would get an electronic calculator and mine was a battery-operated calculator with no batteries included L).

A lot of the time Grandma Florence would shout at me thinking I was messing about behind the curtains and then when she knew it was Sister Alicea, she would change her tune completely. I can’t really remember that much about her apart from her breath always stunk of Fish; she had a dog that was often covered in fleas and that the house wasn’t very clean. We often returned home with Flea Bites.

My Grandma Florence had three other Sons to her previous Husband, the oldest was Charles, then came Peter, the youngest Tommy. My Uncle Charles married a woman named Sheila and they did not have any children.

My Uncle Peter married a woman named Elizabeth and they had a daughter named Ophelia. Uncle Peter and Aunt Elizabeth were my favourite Auntie and Uncle. They later adopted two orphans from a local orphanage and named them Todd and Johnny; they were absolutely adorable.

My Uncle Tommy married a woman named Suzie and they had a daughter named Fiona and a son named Colin.

Well, that is my Real Family from my Biological Father’s side, now it is time to discuss my mother’s side of the Family.

My Grandmother Mina & my Grandfather Javier had four daughters. The oldest daughter was named Nicola, then my mother Vicky, Ellana and Helen. Unfortunately, Nicola was born blind and had severe disabilities and she died before her first birthday.

My mother informed me that my Great Grandmother was deaf and my Great Grandfather was had speech and mental impairments. They had eight children four of them lost their lives in WW1.

I am very proud to say that I worshipped my Grandfather Javier and he served as a Queens Guard for thirty years. My Grandfather did not only support his own family but helped put food on our table when his daughter Vicky (My Mother) was left as a single Parent with two young children.

On the 7th August 1972, I had my Immunisations / Vaccinations for Diphtheria & Poliomyelitis. These were repeated on the 16th January 1973.

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Chapter 2

LIVING IN POVERTY

(1973 – 1974)

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A struggling Single Mother (Vicky Smithson); with two demanding children; a mortgage to pay, bills to pay and Social Services on her case. I honestly don’t know how my sister & I didn’t end up in a foster home. We must have been hard work at such young ages. My Mother was and is a very strong person and I can truly say that not only has she been a wonderful mother to me, but ended up being my best friend & eventually, MY ROCK!

‘Love You Mam,’

‘I will worship the ground that you walk on until

the day ends for either you or myself.’

We as in the Royal ‘Wee’ lived in a Two Bed roomed House / Property with no bathroom and an outside toilet. I can vaguely remember getting washed in the sink once a week. Changing the subject; My Biological Fathers Parents, Grandparents Florence & Harry helped to support my mother in small doses. Again, I haven’t really ascertained accurate information on exactly what they helped my Mother with and I have only heard a one-sided story.

My Sister Alicea & I sometimes used to stay at Grandma Florence’s house but this was later stopped. On the 14th August 1974 my mother took me to see the Doctor and he updated my medical records with: -

‘Flea bites (dog)’

My Mother’s (Rock) at this time was her Father Javier. I am unsure what occupation my Grandad had at this time but I only know that;

‘Once Upon a Time,’ he was a ‘Queens

Guard at Buckingham Palace.’

Then my Grandad Javier became a Lagger. A Lagger applies insulation using a variety of materials including fiberglass, and asbestos to pipes, generators, ducting and other devices. This involved physical labour manually applying insulation and he should have had knowledge of proper material functions. This position / job / career cut his life short.

‘We were robbed of a Husband, Father and Grandfather!’

My Sister Alicea & I were apparently always well dressed with the majority of help and support from my Granddad Javier.

With Granpa Javier’s contribution My Mother Vicky used to dress us looking like Twin Girl’s with the latest fashion at the present time. Sometimes my mother would not tell her Father Javier that she had no food for herself and her children.

My Mother recently confessed to me that she would mix flour and cold water in a bowl and feed it to us daily vs anything with substance.

‘I suppose eating this crap was better than nothing at all!’

My mother had a good group of girlfriends that she had met whilst working at the Whitstable Social Club; Barbara, Tracey, Angela.

These were her main friends that use to visit her and before long my mother was branded as living in a ‘Halfway House’ by my Grandmother; Florence.

My Grandfather Javier told my Mother Vicky that she needed to go out and have nights on the town to enjoy herself. Grandpa Javier gave her the money to go out and socialize while Grandpa Javier and Grandma Mina looked after my Sister Alicea & I.

Whilst my Mother was ‘enjoying’ her evenings on the town, my Sister and I would stay at my Grandparents house. They had a small two-bedroom semi-detached council house in South Kent. During this experience; my Mother would come home late at night and sleep in the same bed with my sister and I.

‘Hallelujah!’

‘Hallelujah!’

‘Hallelujah!’

My Mother met someone at the Platinum Club and started dating again. This was when I was three years old.

My mother’s new boyfriend was called Mariano and he was also an Electrician. Previously he had been working as a Bouncer on the local pub. He was a tall gentleman (6 foot) with collar length hair and blue eyes. He had been brought up to follow the Catholic Religion and he had an interest in following Manchester United Football Club as a Supporter.

Literally speaking….

‘Saved by the Bell’

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Chapter 3

MY OLD / NEW &

EXTENDED FAMILY (1975)

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My Mother’s Side

Grandfather Javier & Grandmother Mina were a very smart looking couple. My Grandfather would often wear a suit and tie to go to the Club called the Bukerns. He used to go there for a few pints and he was a member & part of the Club he had friends on the Committee. Our Grandad would also take us the shop on the side of the Club & buy us sweets. The dog Jacky would always get a packet of pork scratchings.

On the other hand; when My Grandad was working as a Lagger he would come home covered from head to toe in white / grey asbestos dust, he would go to the outhouse & change out of his overalls then go straight in the bathroom to get washed. My Grandad Javier was a Tottenham supporter and his three daughters (Vicky, Ellana & Helen) were brought up Protestant.

Grandmother Mina was a Housewife that cooked, cleaned, washed, ironed and raised their three daughters after her eldest daughter Nicola had died. She used to make a Sunday Tea for us every week with lots of broth, sandwiches, homemade sausage rolls, pies, scones etc -:

"Ab-sol-ut-e-ly –

De – lic - I - ous.!!!!"

Adjective

‘Highly pleasant to the taste.’

‘Delicious home-baked brown bread’

Similar Words: - Mouth-watering; Appetizing, Tasty etc etc.

Mother Vicky & our future Stepfather Mariano (Dad) were / are a very attractive couple. My Stepfather Mariano would come to see my mother, my sister (Alicea) & I after work. He would often buy us sweets/candies on his way home from work. Alicea and I would receive one nice present for birthdays and Christmas. Their relationship blossomed and my Mother Vicky started letting him stay over for the odd night or two.

The next thing you know was that Social Services were on my Mam’s case so they cooled the relationship down for a while.

My Mothers younger sister; Auntie Ellena met a man named Jack who was fond of her. My Grandad did not like Jack from the get go, and let it be known. Auntie Ellena was so sweet, kind & gentle and Jack had a very bad temper and was a Black Belt in Japanese Martial Arts.

At one point, during an evening dinner at my Grandpa Javier’s house, an altercation with my Mother’s sister and Jack erupted. Jack violently punched the glass panel of the front door, shattering broken glass everywhere.

‘All Hell Broke Out!’

My Grandad Javier opened the door and Jack barged in and started fighting and dragging my Auntie Ellena by the hair at the top of the stairs. My Grandad intervened and Jack started doing his Martial Arts on him and knocked my Grandads teeth out!! My Grandad was a strong man and was literally ready to throw Jack down the stairs but then my Grandmother Mina and Mother Vicky stopped him.

‘Pity!’

My Grandad ended up being thrown down the stairs instead and suffered with an extremely bad back after that day. No police were called. Two years from this incident; Auntie Ellena and Jack were married, needless to say, nobody in the Family was happy about it. My Sister Alicea and I were bridesmaids. Jack and Auntie Ellena had a daughter Annabelle and a son named Mark. Auntie Helen was my Mother Vicky’s youngest sister. She was the only daughter still living at home with my Grandma & Grandad. She was absolutely spoiled rotten and single. She went out drinking with the neighbour next door called Lisa. I didn’t like Lisa, I thought she was a very loose woman and she had a bad reputation. Finally, my Auntie Helen met a very tall charismatic gentleman called Anthony. He made up in personality what he didn’t in the looks department. That said, Auntie Helen loved her man.

My Sister Alicea was always my mother’s favourite, but things were starting to change with my mam’s new boyfriend on the scene. We had a good sisterly bond at this stage in life. When my sister started nursery at the Oldtown School across the road from where we lived, I missed her so much every day while she was gone.

Because our bond was so strong and due to how much I missed my sister, the school allowed me to attend classed earlier that usual, so I could be with my big sister. I think this was because I just used to look out of the window all the time to see her at playtime from my house. Hence, my Mother intervened on my behalf with the Headmaster and this allowed me to go to the same school with Alicea.

I now had an extended family with the following:-

• Great Nanna

• Nanna & Grandpa

• 2 Uncles

• 1 Auntie

• 2 Cousins

• 4 Second Cousins

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Chapter 4

OLDTOWN SCHOOL

(1976 – 1981)

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The Oldtown School was literally straight across the road from were we lived. I started the Oldtown School with a mixed range of ages and most of them in my class were older. From my early recognition there was a boy named Jason that was in my same class, he was 15months older than me. He lived around the corner, but for some reason we did not get along and didn’t like each other.

I was feeling insecure and embarrassed when I was introduced to the class and I saw Jason. For some bazaar reason I put my coat over his head as I was walking past him, he didn’t really appreciate this.

The next day I was sitting on my chair at School and all I can remember is Jason putting his coat over my head, causing me to fall from my chair into a table, which resulted in a large gash above my right eye, I had to be taken to the Hospital. My Mother Vicky took me, I had four painful butterfly stitches along with a painful injection in my bottom. My mother didn’t drive, so it was on Public Transport. All I can remember is my mother saying:

‘Be Brave and I will get you a Reward / Treat.’

I was strong being more like a ‘Tom Boy’ than a ‘Tom Girl!’

I need a few stitches above my eye and it hurt!!!! Although I was very brave and I did not cry.

After the deliberate attack on me at school and being injured, I was very disappointed at my treat which my Mother gave me.

A Packet of Plain Crisps with a little packet of Salt in the Bag!!!!! Seriously was she having a laugh 58513.png

A New Father Figure / Dad

The next step of my journey at the Oldtown School was when my Mother and Stepfather (New Father Figure) eventually got married. My oldest sister Alicea and I were Bridesmaids. Our dresses were beautiful from the photos but I can’t really remember much about their Wedding Day.

Alicea & I (Esme Morgan) ended up changing our Surname to Bell. Some of my School Friends didn’t like that & I was upset at that time but I