Take My Wife, Please

By Roque Rosales

Felix is recently divorced from April and currently lives in an efficiency apartment.
He is Oscar’s long-time, best friend.

Oscar is a womanizer and is married to Diane.

His business is finally taking off, so he starts an affair with a young, tantalizing girlfriend, named Cyndi.

Cyndi, is a naive young lady, in her first year of college. She lives in an all-girls dorm.
Who thinks Oscar, is separated?

Oscar’s life is going great, but for one thing?

His marriage, to his faithful wife, Diane.

He wants to get rid of her, but how?

He comes up with a crazy idea, to solve all his problems.
He only needs to persuade Felix, to seduce his wife, and film it on video, as grounds for divorce.

The question is…

Will Felix, do it?

Or rather, do her?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Aug 1, 2022
• ISBN: 9781669840855

Roque Rosales

Roque Rosales, has had his poems in poetry magazines and poetry book anthologies. He is currently writing love poems in, Allpoetry.com. He is not only a writer of Love Poems, but also One Act Romantic Plays, Ten Minute Plays, Comedy Skits and Silly Puppet Skits. Many have been performed on one stage or another, and has received praise and awards for his work. He has written and acted in plays for NMSU theatre, AMT productions, Dinner Theater Productions, and Murder Ink dinner theatre. He has also acted in movies. His first one is called, “Wrong Is Right” with Sean Connery. And his last movie with Edric Ray is called, “The Lonnie Zamora Story” where he played the lead. He also writes small inspirational love poems every morning for Facebook.com. He is currently living in New Mexico, where he is at work on his next collection of poems for an upcoming book, “LONG LONELY NIGHTS.”

Book preview

Copyright © 2022 by Roque Rosales.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 08/01/2022

Xlibris

844-714-8691

www.Xlibris.com

824252

CONTENTS

Dedication:

Synopsis

Cast Of Characters

ACT ONE

SCENE ONE

ACT ONE

SCENE TWO

ACT ONE

SCENE THREE

ACT TWO

SCENE ONE

DEDICATION:

                                To: Jennifer and Dan

                                        Jonathan and Joy

                                        For believing in me,

                                        encouraging me,

                                        and inspiring me,

                                        to write.

                                        I thank you.

TAKE MY WIFE, PLEASE.

This is an adult, romantic comedy, in two acts.

Also, by Roque Rosales

Poetry books:

Sensual Summer

Long Lonely Nights

A Table for Two

Two-act Plays:

Alice In Dreamland

Take My Wife, Please

SYNOPSIS

Felix is recently divorced from April and currently lives in an efficiency apartment. He is Oscar’s long-time, best friend.

Oscar is a womanizer and is married to Diane.

His business is finally taking off, so he starts an affair with a young, tantalizing girlfriend, named Cyndi.

Cyndi, is a naive young lady, in her first year of college. She lives in an all-girls dorm. Who thinks Oscar, is separated?

Oscar’s life is going great, but for one thing?

His marriage, to his faithful wife, Diane.

He wants to get rid of her, but how?

He comes up with a crazy idea, to solve all his problems. He only needs to persuade Felix, to seduce his wife, and film it on video, as grounds for divorce.

The question is…

Will Felix, do it?

Or rather, do her?

CAST OF CHARACTERS

FELIX:

A shy computer analyst. He leads a quiet, precise and often too predictable life. He is very much attracted to DIANE, who also happens to be OSCAR’s wife. He has always kept this to himself. Until tonight.

OSCAR:

He and FELIX have been best friends since High School. He has become a big success in the chemical business. He is truly a born salesman, if ever there was one. And he has become quite the womanizer. He likes to love them and leave them.

DIANE:

OSCAR’s wife. She is an attractive woman. She has always been attracted to FELIX. She has kept this to herself, and has become faithful in her marriage.

CYNDI:

She is eighteen, trusting and very pretty. She is having an affair with OSCAR. Believing he is separated and getting a divorce. She is young, but she’s nobody’s fool.

APRIL:

She is FELIX’S Ex-wife, who recently divorced him and took him for everything.

ACT ONE

SCENE ONE

THE SET:

One room serves as the living area and bedroom. The efficiency apartment, is arranged with an abundance of plants of all sizes and types. The room is furnished with a sofa bed, chair, table, floor lamp, and a mini bar. The sofa is set to open with sheets and pillows. There is a closet with louver doors, a front door, and a doorway to the bathroom and kitchen.

THE TIME:

It is around six, on a Friday Winters Evening.

OPENING SCENE:

OSCAR: (He is wearing a suit and a tie, and is drinking a beer.)

FELIX:  (He is dressed comfortably, wearing slacks, shirt, and a sweater. He is busy watering his plants.)

OSCAR: When you were eighteen Felix, would you have believed you’d spend a Friday night, watering plants?

FELIX:  Some people change.

OSCAR: (Sarcastic, referring to FELIX’s plants.) It’s amazing, what can become important in some people’s lives.

FELIX:  I’m not going to help you.

OSCAR: What’s the big problem? (He removes his coat and tosses it on the sofa.) It happens, you know? (He loosens his tie and shirt and studies the room.) Like it did with you and April.

FELIX:  Yeah, I remember.

OSCAR: So, what is the problem?

FELIX:  Diane is still married to you.

OSCAR: Even you, agree that’s the problem.

FELIX:  What problem?

OSCAR: Diane.

FELIX:  I’ve always felt sorry for Diane.

OSCAR: Why can’t you feel sorry for me?

FELIX:  Why you?

OSCAR: Having to be married to her?

FELIX:  She deserves better.

OSCAR: You’re doing me the favor, not her. I’m your best friend. We grew up together.

FELIX:  (He puts down the watering container. And then goes to the couch, and picks up OSCAR’s coat, goes to the closet on his left, and hangs up the coat.)

OSCAR: Why do you care so much about Diane?

FELIX:  I don’t know. I just do. (Pause.) And, if you’re going to leave your things here, you could at least pick up after yourself.

OSCAR: It could work.

FELIX:  What would?

OSCAR: You and Diane.

FELIX:  No, it wouldn’t.

OSCAR: Why not? (Pause.) You and Diane get along. You two love dirt and flowers. When you were married to April, do you think April and I enjoyed spending weekends with you and Diane at garden shops?

FELIX:  You two didn’t have to go?

OSCAR: You two, could spend weekends potting.

FELIX:  Huh?

OSCAR: You can’t tell me you haven’t wanted to get into my wife’s plants?

FELIX:  Are you serious?

OSCAR: I am.

FELIX:  Why don’t you find her a nice florist to keep her company?

OSCAR: I could. (Pause.) But first, I need grounds for a quick divorce.

FELIX:  Divorce?

OSCAR: That’s the name of the game, my friend. (Pause,) Ask any lawyer? (Pause.) You’ve got to give them grounds. (Pause.) Like adultery, photos, names, dates, places.

FELIX:  I understand, but…

OSCAR: I’m not talking about anything weird here. (As he speaks, he stealthily reveals a small video camera he pulls from his pocket.) It’s just the way it’s done.

FELIX:  I get it. (Pause.) But…

OSCAR: I don’t like it, any more than you do.

FELIX:  (He points to the camera.) What is that?

OSCAR: A video camera.

FELIX:  It doesn’t look like a camera.

OSCAR: That’s the beauty of it. This is the kind of thing, spies use. You can hide it anywhere, like a chameleon. (He looks around the room.) She’ll never see it.

FELIX:  How does it work?

OSCAR: This connects to a phone app. (He places the camera behind plants. Steps back and observes the camera. He’s unsatisfied and moves the camera behind other plants.) What’s wrong with doing what I’ve asked you to do?

FELIX:  I don’t know, if she even likes me like that?

OSCAR: I know she likes you. She talks about you all the time. (He moves plants to hide the camera. He moves some leaves and tears a few, to open the view. He tosses the leaves to the floor.)

FELIX:  (He picks up the leaves.) She’ll end up hating us both.

OSCAR: What do you care?

FELIX:  I know I shouldn’t. (Pause.) But…I do.

OSCAR: She looks good for her age. (Pause.) Don’t you think?

FELIX:  Yes, she does.

OSCAR: And, she’s not exactly a dead fish in bed. You know?

FELIX:  (He’s shocked he heard that.) Excuse me?

OSCAR: Maybe, she doesn’t have big boobs. (Pause.) But, none of the girls you dated in High School, had big boobs. (Pause.) I know. (Pause.) Cuz, I looked.

FELIX:  Yeah, you’re right.

OSCAR: She keeps herself in shape.

FELIX:  That she does.

OSCAR: And… she loves plants!

FELIX:  So, what more could I want, right?

OSCAR: (He looks around the room. Looking for other plants to hide the camera.) Right.

FELIX:  So, what is it you need from me?

OSCAR: One night, one hour. (Pause.) That’s all I’m asking for.

FELIX:  I don’t know about this?

OSCAR: Just try.

FELIX:  Just to make sure. (Pause.) You are asking me, to sleep with your wife, right?

OSCAR: Yes.

FELIX:  But…

OSCAR: No buts. (Pause.) All I want is a simple yes, or no.

FELIX:  I’ve been saying no, all week. (Pause.) Remember?

OSCAR: No, I don’t.

FELIX:  I want to help you, but…

OSCAR: