TWO MAKES FOUR: DADDY ELMO

By Gregory J. McKenzie

Elmo is shocked to learn he will be the father of twins. Fran was now certain that she would have to prepare to be a mother. The two of them had moved to London from Florida so that Fran could work for one year in her law firm's overseas office. They loved their little basement flat. Privately they called it their honeymoon flat. Fran and Elmo had been married less than one year. But would they be able to stay in such a small flat with two babies? Fran's mother back in Florida was insistent on her daughter returning to her home land. Fran wanted to stay in London to have her babies. Elmo just wanted to be there for his young wife. In Florida friends and family waited with baited breath. Elmo's enemy the "dragon lady" was happy and wished he would never returned to work. But Fran and Elmo would have to return home some day. There family, friends and enemies would all be waiting to make their lives very interesting. Just how interesting only time would tell. One thing was certain they both would never stop loving each other.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tablo Publishing
• Release date: May 18, 2022
• ISBN: 9781685833824

Book preview

Chapter 1

Twins! The first ultra sound taken in London was on April 1st, not a trustworthy date. This botched test had detected the sex of one baby but had failed to detect the presence of its twin. This was the same clinic that had given the previous false reading after only three months in London. Finally Fran decided to change to a better private clinic. Her next ultrasounds had been more professionally handled. Doctor Rosemary Simpson was one of the best young pediatricians in London. When she did an ultrasound of a newly pregnant woman she was thoroughly professional and precise in all her prechecks.

 These new tests confirmed the expecting couple's worst fears. There was not one baby but two on the way. Of course they were both delighted but still overawed. For one month, Elmo remained in denial. He had wishful thoughts like:

She's not big enough for twins..

They do get these things wrong you know..

Its probably a boy…a BIG BOY..

 But Elmo was wrong on all counts. This was brought home dramatically when he was in the London private hospital delivery room. Of course Fran was handling it brilliantly. Her mother, on the other hand, had already threatened to snatch her daughter away to a private sanitorium in Florida. But Fran had put her foot down. She had followed the advice of Doctor Rosemary from the London Private Natal Clinic. The LPPC was said to have the best maternity doctors in London. Of course they could afford the most expensive obstetrician in town, but Fran wanted it done her way.

When Elmo's mother-in-law had flown over to London she did not help matters by continually criticizing Elmo. She was appalled at the size of their basement flat. It was only after Fran pointedly told her that she had chosen the flat for its ‘atmosphere’ that Elmo was released from at least one assault on his competency as a husband.

But Mrs. Upjohn had a whole litany of complaints. The food Elmo prepared for his pregnant wife was top of the list. Fran's mother scoured London to find an AMERICAN FOODS franchise. Then she brought back what she thought were all of Fran's favorite foods. But Mrs. Upjohn was shocked when her daughter told her that all the food she bought was ‘teenager food’ that she had not eaten for ten years.

This constant griping at Elmo started to weigh on Fran's nerves. Fran's father often had to steer his wife away from their fuming daughter just in time. The task of keeping his wife away from his daughter took up most of Mr. Upjohn' time and ingenuity.  He moved his wife on to focus on other targets. First by getting his wife to engage in a war of words with the hotel staff. Mrs. Upjohn had complained that their room was too small to be called a suite, that the hot water wasn't hot enough and that their breakfast was too fishy. When that failed to absorb her vitriol, Mr. Upjohn began pointing out that they had still not been received at the US Embassy. Mrs. Upjohn made large political donations and expected her money's worth out of embassy staff. Her calls to the embassy did not win her any friends.

Finally Fran was rushed to hospital late one cold October night. It was very early in the morning before Fran's mother and father arrived via a much delayed taxi.  So Elmo had been left alone in the pre delivery prep room. He was not feeling well. The pregnancy had taken its toll on Elmo's nerves. Not good with blood in any form, Elmo was a real risk of fainting at any moment. He tried to be supportive but it was Fran that was doing all the calming down. She was saying to him

Now darling there is nothing to worry about with all these fine doctors and nurses on hand to help. Just take long deep breaths. I am sure that you will be the best new dad in this hospital very soon.

Elmo jumped when Fran said those words ‘new dad’. Knowing that his wife did not like him keeping secrets from her about anything, Elmo confessed

That's just it Fran. I think I will make a lousy father. I have no experience. Well I have read all the books and visited all the web sites. But that's not hands on experience is it? No. I will be a failure as a Dad.

Fran knew she had to take a firm line with her husband when he doubted himself. So she said

What nonsense sweetheart. Look how well you did at our prenatal classes. All the expectant mothers came up to me to tell me how lucky I was to have you there at every lesson. Most of their husbands had found excuses not to attend.

Not wanting to desert his fellow man, so he said

Not Martin! He was there every lesson. I don't know how he did so well in those assisted breathing exercises. I failed each and every time.

Thankful that Elmo had got off his ‘fear tripping’ , Fran pushed the line opened by her husband. She nodded then said

Sorry I was forgetting Martin. Well of course he loves his wife to distraction. Did you see what he almost did to that big lug who accidentally spilled his water bottle over her exposed belly. It was lucky you were there to restrain him. That big guy would have beaten him to a pulp. But they still have a month to go and you know how hard that last month was for you and your nerves.

Secretly Fran added to herself

And for everyone around you. Really you completely lost it.

But to Elmo's face she presented a smiling face merely adding these words

Now be a dear and go and get me a nurse or a doctor. I think my contractions are just right. Hurry darling if you don't want to have to deliver the twins yourself.

Just as she had planned, those last words had Elmo bolting from the room. Her contractions were not really close enough as well she knew, but she had needed some time alone to explain things to the twins. So she said softly to her belly

Now don't go judging daddy too harshly. He is very much looking forward to being your daddy.  So be gentle with him when you finally get out of my tummy.

Just then her mother turned up next to her bed with a list of criticisms about the hospital that she always complained about tirelessly. Mrs. Upjohn wined

You would choose this place over ALL my objections. Why you did not fly back to Florida the second you got confirmation of these twins I'll never know? No not you. You extended your stay here so that they could be born overseas for some unknown reason I cannot and will not understand. What's wrong with being born in the USA I'd like to know? Besides the hospitals in Florida are so much better than these English hospitals. The staff are way too young for a start. Well I just saw a nurse…

Fran was in too comfortable a place with her twins to listen to her mother rant and rave; so Fran just tuned her out whilst she hummed her favorite nursey rhyme.

Finally the doctor turned up and admitted that it was time. Fran guessed that this was done to clear the room of her mother. Some time later Fran was taken to the delivery room. Elmo was asked to go in too but Mr. & Mrs. Upjohn were shown to the nearest waiting room. Elmo started to shake violently. Suddenly all the nurses were rushing to reassure him and help him breathe.

Fran was temporarily forgotten but was used to the way women fawned over Elmo. She had to admit that if anything he was even more handsome than when she married him just under a year ago. But it was Elmo's boyish charm that won female hearts. Everyone wanted to mother Elmo. Some even wanted much more from him. But Fran knew that Elmo was hers body and soul.

Fran remembered her wedding day. All that drama about how other women tried to steal Elmo away was upsetting at the time. But he was so obviously in love with Fran. Those other women just had to cope with Elmo going on to marry the love of his life. Of course Fran had forgiven Elmo's boss. Eloise Applegate had tried to do a groom snatch on Elmo. But Elmo had put her straight on his feelings for his bride. Now Fran only felt pity for her rival's embarrassment in front of all those people. Fran liked Frank Applegate, Eloise's father, and Gerald her boyfriend. So she had decided to forgive and forget as far as that rival was concerned.

As for another rival, Henrietta Hunt, well she could jump into the ocean as far as Fran was concerned. That stunt with the fake photo of Elmo kissing another woman, well it was the last straw. Fran had told off this rival personally in front of the whole church full of Florida's finest families. If  that woman had any sense, thought Fran, she would have booked the first flight out of town.

Fran was still not sure about that Janet Elsebrook woman. She had at one time being Elmo's boss. It was only after Gerald had pulled her aside and explained matters that Fran could see why she had tried to ruin her wedding. Janet Elsebrook, called the ‘Dragonlady’ by Gerald, was not a rival but an enemy. She wanted to get Elmo deported. Gerald said it was because Elmo had ruined her chances of promotion. That woman had blackmailed a senior US Immigration official. A man called Herman something, Fran could not recall actually hearing his surname from Gerald. Only when an old school buddy, Amelia Andrews, had taken over Elmo immigration file did the harassments stop. In the end Elmo got his official US residency status confirmed.

When the doctors entered the hospital delivery room normality was restored. Fran was put in centre stage and the delivery of the twins began in earnest. Elmo stayed upright if a bit shaky to see his two babies emerge from his wife' s body. But when the nurse began to wipe away the blood…well that was when Elmo fainted.

All his mother in law said when she heard of this, was to quote her own grandmother. Mrs Upjohn said

Grandmother Sheppard always said that a birthing was no place for men. She said that it simply had nothing to do with them, so they should just go off somewhere and smoke cigars.

Her husbands had been hearing these sayings of ‘Grandmother Sheppard’ all his married life; but he had learnt not to criticize these family sayings. so he simply said

Yes dear. How true.

Chapter 2

Elmo woke up in a hospital bed. Three young nurses were fretting over his vital signs. He was saved from their attempts to ‘help that lovely man’ by the arrival of the ward nurse. She said firmly

Out all of you. There is nothing wrong with this man. He just fainted. This is a maternity clinic not a hospital emergency department. Get back to work.

When the three nurses had reluctantly left the room the older nurse said

Come on up with you. I am sure your wife is wondering what happened to her partner.  She has been taken to Room 319. The babies are fine! Hurray now or someone else might get their first smile.

Hearing these words Elmo jumped up from the bed and bolted from the room followed by the older nurse's laughing warning

Carefully Mr. Eveings you just had a mild episode….

But Elmo was already too far away to hear her words of wisdom. Getting into a lift almost full was a hurdle that Elmo avoided by running up the stairs. He arrived in his wife's room out of breath but eager to see his babies. Of course his mother-in-law were holding both the babies. Then there was three adults staring at the little bundles. Totally absorbed in the babies and their slightest facial twitch, the dotting admirers were brought back to earth by these words from the mother lying prone in her bed

I am also in the room you know. Perhaps I could get some attention. Not that I mind been abandoned straight after going through the pain of childbirth.

Elmo's head spun around at these words and he ran to placate his abandoned wife. He said

"No one is ignoring you darling. Its just we all want to see the baby smile. You look great…..I mean  beautiful!'

A look of scorn played on Fran's face before she said

I look horrid. There better not be anyone visiting me today apart from family. Oh its okay darling I am just going to have to get used to being the invisible one in our new family. You are you and no one can compete with newly born babies.

Not exactly knowing what his wife was talking about, Elmo tried to use reason. He said

I always notice you when I enter a room. Your beauty draws many admiring glances.

Again there was a strange look on Fran's face as she said

Maybe before I got pregnant that may have been the case. But no one looks at you that way once you are a mother. Even you Elmo used to look more at my expanding belly than at my face. Yes you did. Once I caught you in our bed talking to my stomach.

Not sure how to answer this charge, Elmo tried to change the subject. He said

Can I get you something from the café downstairs?

Fran realized that her husband would never change so she said

Well I guess alcohol is still out so how about a large black coffee with five sugars. And a donut. One of the frosted kind.

Given his order Elmo raced out to win back his wife's good graces.

Whilst he was gone the inevitable struggle between mother and grandmother took on a third dimension. Fran said to her mother

Do you think I may be able to hold my own babies? Really mother I am not going to break down in tears. You are hogging my twins.

Affronted at this charge, Mrs Upjohn handed over the two little babies to her daughter. But the babies had been comfortably resting in the crock of their grandmother's woolen jacket. Their young mother's naked arms were cold. So the babies cried. Fran looked distressed at this first contact response from her children.  Her mother almost snatched back the grandchildren but her husband cleverly restrained her. He then said

You two new parents need time alone together. My car is parked in a limited stay zone. Over here they tow your car away if you overstay your allotted time. We will go and come back later.

With that he almost frogmarched his wife out of the room. Fran could hear her mother scathing remarks all the way to the lift. Then the quiet of the room allowed her to address her babies. She said

Now the three of us must come to an understanding. Freya and Nathaniel you must trust me. If you promise not to cry ever time I hold you tight, then I will promise not to treat either of you the way your grandmother treated me. Is it a deal?

Fran looked up to see Elmo's smiling face. He answered for his twins

Its a deal Mum. Babies our Dad promises never to ignore either us or you, but will love all three of us forever. By the way he just loves the names who have finally chosen for us.

Fran started to cry for no reason she could fathom. But she didn't care because Elmo had crossed the room and wrapped her in a loving embrace. They stayed like that for some time. Meanwhile the twins went for a quiet nap in their mother's arms.

The news of Elmo and Fran's twins flew across the Atlantic to Elmo's former workplace. Most were happy for the young couple. Gerald and Eloise, now secretly engaged, were both glad things worked out so well for Elmo. They did not speak anymore of the scene made by Eloise at Elmo's wedding.  Eloise had been absolutely sure that Elmo was the one man for her. But Elmo had explained that he loved her only like a sister and not romantically. It was Gerald who had been there to help Eloise pick up the pieces of her shattered ego.

Now they shared another secret. There would be another staff member, well two staff members actually,  having a baby. Eloise Applegate said

I am truly happy for Fran and Elmo. They were made for each other. You and I Gerald will have our own bundle of joy in December.

Gerald pretended to be cross when he said

Shh! Not so loud. Walls have ears. Our budget won't cope unless we can keep this under wraps for as long as possible.

Fran laughed then whispered softly

I don't think we have to worry about affording a new addition to our team. My ‘you know who’ has been dying for just such an event to happen before he got much older. He even wants to train the newcomer in important things like fishing.

Laughing along with his beloved Gerald said

I can just see Frank knee deep in waves on his private beach holding a fishing rod and explaining the finer points of casting to his grandchild. But he does know that new members of fishing families come with a considerable downtime, doesn't he?

Smiling wickedly Eloise said

Probably not, seeing as how its his first grandchild. When I was four he tried to show me how to fish. My fishing rod came with a dolly. I cared more for the dolly than the fishing rod. It was very small and had a plastic line and rubber hook. I dangled it in a beach pond but no fish was keen to jump on my hook. So I cried all the way home. That was my first and last fishing lesson.

Laughing and smiling at his secret partner, Gerald said

Well our child is safe from me. I am a hopeless fisherman. My Dad used to pretend he was going fishing to get out of the house to go drinking. If he got too drunk he would come back with the fish still wrapped up from the shop. One night he was so drunk he brought back cooked fish then tried to convince my Mum that he gutted it on the beach and cooked it on an open fire. My Mum really was a saint for putting up with him.

Teasing her partner Eloise said

So both of the newcomer's grandfathers are fishermen. I pity the poor thing.

They then lowered their voices even further as they talked of more intimate things. This was lucky because at that moment Janet Elsebrook walked past Louise's office. It had once been her office and Gerald had been her assistant before her promotion. But the scene she planned at Elmo's wedding had backfired on her badly and her career was in limbo. She had been told by her boss Mr. Harrington that any false step would see her contact torn up and her career abruptly ended. So Janet walked as if on eggshells around the office.  Janet knew that her boss's secretary, Sheila Shuttlecock, was keeping her eye on everything that Janet did for the firm. Seething inside her mind was the name of the person responsible for all her troubles : ELMO EVEINGS. If it took her the rest of her life Janet Dragon lady Elsebrook was determined to get her revenge on that man.

Chapter 3

Fran was exhausted from the birth of the twins, so the sniping by Mrs. Upjohn against all of Elmo's efforts as a first time father went unchecked. Luckily Elmo was totally focused on his two little additions to the family. Of course he had fallen in love with both of them as soon as he saw them in their mother's arms. They were so small he could hold one in each hand. With all their baby blankets the newborns were carried carefully out of the hospital. Elmo had hired a car. That way he could sit in the back with Fran and hold one of the twins.

But not gone back to their basement flat. Instead the hire car drove them to a very expensive rental apartment booked for them by Fran's father. He had known the drama his wife was preparing to start playacting if Elmo dared take his loved ones back to that little flat. This basement flat was now Mrs. Upjohn' main target of complaints. She had exhausted the obvious ones like

So cold I don't know why they bother buying a refrigerator.

Not enough room for one little American girl let alone the babies.

Those steps have ice all over them and are a health hazard.

Now she was really warming up the vitriol with king hits like

The neighborhood is filled with criminals and those trade people.

As well as Mr. Upjohn's favorite

Really why the basement? Don't they have penthouses apartments in London?

To give his son-in-law a chance to help Fran get over any postnatal blues, Mr. Upjohn had got them an apartment as far away from his hotel.   Even outside of peak hours it was still a one hour taxi ride across town from the in-laws hotel to reach this apartment. This way he could use London city' notorious traffic as an excuse not to visit Fran more than once a day.

Luckily for the sanity of both Fran and Elmo their ordeal was short. Mr. Upjohn invented an emergency back at his business headquarters in Florida. He insisted that he needed his wife's help to sort out the mess. By implicating one of his wife's bitterest enemies in his business troubles, Mr. Upjohn was able to get his wife to accompany him back to the USA. All his ingenuity would be needed to keep her there for the last part of her daughter's London exodus. He started by pointing out that a woman who had just given birth to twins should not be flying back to the USA in an airplane any time soon. But this would only work for so long.

Left alone Fran and Elmo got down to the business of settling their twins into a daily routine. This seemed to involve many late night feeds and nappy changing at all hours. A sort of siege mentality settled down on their household.  Every the time parents and babies were making their way home, a new peace accord had to be established between parents and children. It was all very exhausting for these first time parents. They began tag teaming up on nappy changes and the boring sleep patrols. Soon their eyes were red from lack of sleep and they became pale from a lack of outside exposure.

Fortunately for their sanity they only less than two months left of their time in London. Sometime before Christmas they would have to take their twins back to their new Florida home. It was still been built strictly to Fran's detailed instructions. Elmo had sold many of his most valuable collectable wines to pay for its constructions. Given that she was freaking out about supporting two more mouths to feed for like forever, Elmo had to reassure her that his estate could still support their expanded family .

Fran was exhausted from the breast feeding routine she had to follow. This meant that Elmo did all the housework and all the cooking. He also did all the shopping and all the disposal of baby nappies. Choosing wisely to go shopping only when Fran and the babies were sleeping after feeding, Elmo walked the local streets as he went from shop to shop. As this was always in the long non-daylight hours of winter in London, Elmo felt like a nigh watchman.

Only the weekends did he venture out at daybreak. This was when he went to the Burroughs Markets to get the good cheese and ham Fran craved.  Prosciutto di Palma was Fran's absolute favorite lunch food. She like to add some Mozzarella di bufala to her ham sandwich. Elmo had to search high and low all over London for the sort of bread that Fran grew up on in Florida. In the end, to save his sanity,  Elmo did a home baking course and made it for her fresh every day.

At the Borough Markets, Elmo's charm got him extra slices of Prosciutto and a free slice of their best cheese. He was greeted at every stall by name. So Elmo heard the weekly chorus of

Elmo my man…come buy the best ham on the planet.

Then a competing voice would break in on this banter

Don't believe him Elmo. Irish ham is the best. Everyone knows that for a fact..

Only for this voice to be drowned out by yet another

Elmo they are both wrong. Scottish ham wins first prize every time..

Laughing Elmo bought ham from each vendor and promised to come back in one week with his final decision. Luckily the cheese vendors were all women. They gave him cheaper cheese without all that bantering.

Of course this is done over again every week and no one checked to see which seller Elmo preferred. In fact he always gave some of the ham to a man who haunted his local station. That, with one of his freshly home baked loaf of bread, was welcomed especially in winter. Elmo was not assaulted for this reason and because he was a tall, bulky Aussie.

Carefully timing his ventures away from the home nest, Elmo was able to explore much of London in the dark hours. He like to visit the railway stations around the London CBD. Saint Pancreas Station was good for spotting the tourist arriving from Paris.   Their shock, when London cab drivers would leave them struggling with baggage as the driver sat like a statue in his seat, never failed to amuse Elmo. It gave him flashbacks to his own first impression of London cabbies.

Close to that railway station was one of Elmo's favorite pubs. If he saw an obviously freaked out American tourist trying to get a cab and failing, Elmo would walk right up and introduced himself. Then he would invite them for a drink at that pub. The American tourist would leave the pub hours later thinking he had met his guardian angel. One of the bar women at that pub would always have a baby in a pram close to her workstation. She told Elmo that it was her sister's baby. Elmo thought that this was a uniquely English form of baby creche.

A short walk from that pub was Elmo's favorite Greek shop. There he surprised the owner by always ordering a hot cup of green tea with his chips. This would be nursed until he reached his favorite serenity park. It was a Greater London Council facility that was a haven for council workers who had spend the entire day cleaning up this small park. Elmo liked to read his evening newspaper in this park. After this he would walk past the best coffee shop in his part of London. Both Fran and Elmo loved their coffee. So Elmo would bring home fresh coffee to Fran along, with the ham and the cheese. His freshly baked bread would lift both their spirits.

Some evenings he would be too late to get a paper from his local shop. On these days he would skip the pub and go to a local internet café. Here is called up all the news from around the world. This way he kept up with significant events going on in Florida.

Other evenings he would walk to Kings Cross station. There it was that the local commuters that inspired his humour. They were all so glum as they filed out onto the streets. Anyone smiling just had to be a tourist. Walking back to his little home, Elmo would pass all sorts of ethnic cooking venues. The wafts of aromatic food would tempt him to stop and buy some spicy food. This he would have to consume before he got back to the flat. Fran did not like spicy food. She was a vegan who gaaged at the smell of roasted meat.

Long before the babies had arrived, Elmo had looked at the prospect of running his own car in London. But apart from the congestion tax, the cost of parking was too prohibitive for two cars. Cars were cheap to buy but the petrol prices were much higher than in the USA. So Elmo learnt how to use the highly efficient London bus system. Even after the birth of the twins, the bus was still the best way to get around London. There was a space on all the buses for their pram. On the street you got constant updates on arrival times. Most of the bus drivers were women who soon warmed to Elmo's charming manner.

Only when his little family was going out of London did Elmo hire a car. Then he would have to pack that small car up with all the baby gear needed to get though any one day. The baby capsules were bolted onto the back seat. Then the boot was packed to capacity.

Their favorite place to visit was Henley-On-Thames. They would drive there for a Saturday or Sunday outing.   After the morning feed the little family would go by car to this tourist village. They would park in the village then take the twins in their pram down to the Thames Path. This became their routine as soon as the winter winds arrived in London.

The walk along Thames Path was calming to the nerves of both Fran and Elmo. The twins seemed to like the sounds they heard as they made happy noises on these walks. Going to the weir the couple watched as a boat negotiated the locks on their way through up river.  Turning back to get some lunch this small family would often go past the  ducks, geese and see the swans swimming past. Fran feed the geese but was less impressed on day when the geese stole her bread roll.

Driving back to London, Elmo was careful with his speed. His new friends in London had explained to him that the road traffic authorities had two ways to check up on speeding drivers. They said that when a car entered an M road a photo was taken of its number plate. Then when you eventually leave the M road another photo was taken. These photos had times printed on them for comparison. The speed of the car was then estimated. If its average speed was too high the car owner would be fined.

The second way of detecting speeding drivers was reserved for danger spots. Here speed cameras operated 24/7 to catch anyone speeding. even before the twins became precious passengers, Elmo was keen to stay under the designated speed limit. But for some months during their stay in London, Fran was driving her brand new sports car. She was less careful with her speeding. After her third big speeding fine, Fran gave the keys over permanently to Elmo. He booked the car for the slow boat trip back to the USA. It would take three months just to arrive in an American port.  They decided to use public transport as much as possible in London.

Chapter 4

Before the babies had arrived Fran and Elmo had gone on many day trips over the many weekends they spent in London. They were secretly glad that Fran's first ultrasound test had proven to be wrong. They thought that they were just not ready to be parents. But they were ready to be weekend tourists.

So the two of them became weekend trippers. One trip was to the British Museum. Once inside the British Museum Elmo followed the signs that led him to the library. Fran had decided to go alone on a mission of her own. Getting lost Elmo looked for guidance. He had lost faith in his LondonCityTourist app so had turned off his smartphone. A museum warden directed him to the library. Once in the library Elmo went up to the readers help desk. It was being manned by an intern who took one look at Elmo then rushed over to give him the benefit of her inexperience. Elmo asked for the first editions he wanted to read and she whimpered

Oh not the first editions? That is outside my gambit. I will have to call someone senior. You just wait right there and I will be back in a moment.

Elmo said innocently

I will wait right here with baited breath for your return.

Going up to another women in the library the intern weakly pointed towards Elmo. One moment this woman's face was etched in venom then, but as soon as the woman actually sees Elmo's face, she did a double take. All the signs of infatuation now appear smeared across her facial features. Instead of storming up to Elmo and telling him that there was no way he could have a read of their first editions, this woman slinked up to Elmo and said

I believe you wish to read some of our first editions. Normally we do not permit casual readers such a big privilege. But in your case I am willing to make an exception. Now what first editions are you requiring to read today? We have the biggest collection in all of Britain.

Elmo said hesitantly

Look I don't want to get you or this beautiful young lady into any trouble.  I fully understand if the rule on reading precludes me from seeing any of your first editions.

Simpering under Elmo's brilliant gaze, the second librarian said

Rule? No. Its more of a guideline. We cannot just let anyone touch the first editions. But unless its one from our priceless collection, I cannot see why we can't bend the rules just this once. Its more than my job is worth to let you read our most valuable books. As for the other first editions I am game if you are willing to do so under my strict supervision. Would that be okay?

      The radiance of Elmo's smile would have overwhelmed any susceptible onlooker. Both the librarian and the intern moaned as they saw Elmo's brilliantly white teeth. Then Elmo said

Here I have written down the two book titles. Supervision while I read you books is fine by me. You are certainly a very charming young lady.

Laughing like a schoolgirl the librarian took the book title short list and hurried off to the first edition stack computer. Meanwhile the intern tried to engage Elmo in conversation. She started with her opening gambit by saying in her best voice

Have you been in London long Mister…?

Elmo extends his hand as he said

"Sorry I did not introduce myself and my friend. I am Elmo Eveings from Florida USA. To answer your question I will say that my wife and I have been in London for two months. We are here for one