Escaping The Matrix Of Toxicity

By Evangelia Vensel

A true testimony of overcoming childhood traumas, abuse, molestation, rape, bullying, addiction, infertility, toxicity and the illness it creates when it is unresolved and suppressed. A story of triumph and empowerment that real true healing does exist and to never give up!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Evangelia Vensel
• Release date: Dec 19, 2021
• ISBN: 9798201411183

Evangelia Vensel

Evangelia shares how she overcame her toxic way of life that includes her defeat of Lyme disease. She has a passion to help others through many different modalities: motivational and inspirational speaking, writing, creating, holistic wellness advocate, non-toxic cosmetologist, holistic life transformational coach, mindset reset coach, host for healing retreats off the grid, energy/light/body worker, cellular healer, and most importantly, a vessel for God's message to help empower others to take their power back, in a Holistic way.

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

Unresolved Trauma

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I want to start out by acknowledging and honoring everyone out there who is living with unresolved trauma.  What’s it like to be born into a negative environment? What it’s like to grow up being labeled, bullied and being given false diagnoses due to unresolved trauma.  I want to bring hope to the hopeless ones. Bring empowerment to all the victims of childhood trauma and abuse. Offer inspiration to those battling chronic illness and pain. A message to those that have made terrible mistakes and sinned, that yes, they can change and make transformational improvements. I know God’s purpose behind me experiencing, battling and overcoming trauma and the illness/dis-ease it created, allowed me to find and now share solutions for this form of pain and existence.

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I was never really heard, was never able to speak my truth or my feelings. I was never seen or supported during emotional abuse or trauma. My grandmother was my safe person. This book won’t be going down my rabbit hole of the abuse and traumas I endured as a child and growing into adulthood. That’s for book number two! This book is about how I escaped it all.

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I know we’ve all heard the phrase ‘this is your brain on drugs’  but what I want to write about and share with the world is, ‘this is your train with trauma.’  The brain does all sorts of self sabotage tricks on us; being suspicious and untrusting of everyone and everything, being super negative and pessimistic, having an addictive personality and falling victim to addiction. We develop a scattered and destructive mind that can manifest in the lack of desires, motivation and energy. We have a self critical mind. We judge ourselves and others. We learn to keep our deepest emotions to ourselves.  The matrix loves to keep us locked in the labyrinth. It never seemed possible to heal from what happened to me and I couldn’t find any real solutions for healing less reliving the traumatic event on a therapist's couch.

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In this book, I want to share what life is like experiencing traumatic events. The side effects of childhood trauma, aka, CPTSD (childhood post traumatic stress disorder), how it plays out into adulthood and how it presents itself in many forms. It eventually turns into PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) if it never gets addressed. Catastrophe can result if left unhealed and unaddressed. Any form of trauma whether that be physical, emotional, sexual, mental, spiritual, it all compromises the way our mind, body and spirit function, especially our immune system and nervous system. It alters the way we perceive the world around us. We become highly sensitive to so many things. We grow up with a compromised immune system and false perceptions. It affects the function of our cellular activity, our very essence, the very thing our God, the creator of all things created us from - CELLS. Cells get passed on to us by our parents and all their ancestors. Once the cells get disrupted from any form of trauma, a negative vibrational imprint is created, the bio-field aka spirit begins to have cracks (which I call unhealed wounds). Trauma also hijacks our nervous system and impairs our limbic system in the brain.

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The earlier the trauma, the more compromised you become with age, the more sensitive you become to sounds, low vibrations, negative energies, foods, chemicals, products, environments, colds, infections, viruses, bacteria, influenza and certain types of toxic people. The more you are compromised at a young age, the more negative events and experiences will follow.  Your entire bio-field becomes altered. Early trauma also pushes the brain into functioning and dominantly running on the right hemisphere of the brain. We become right brain dominant (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing but it doesn’t really fit in with the matrix very well). We tend to look way outside the box because being inside a box makes us want to jump out of our own skin.  It can feel like being held against your will but we have to learn to blend and fit in somehow. This also can be passed on to us if we have a parent that functions on the right brain hemisphere.

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So without the awareness or knowledge of what existing with trauma is like, or what life is like being a right brain dominant thinker. I was thrown into an abyss of many categories, like millions of others. I was given many stickers, labels and diagnoses. I was either too hyper, too happy, too excited or too sad, aka ADHD, overly emotionally sensitive, aka depressive/suicidal impulsive, aka bi-polar following the wrong crowd, aka bad kid, poor decision making, aka dumb addiction, aka addict , or mistake maker, aka sinner .. the list goes on and it's different for each and every one of us that have had to exist and cope with living with trauma. We get labeled as the trouble maker, the disobedient ones, the misfits, outcasts, the stupid ones, weird ones or the ones that just blindly follow and continue to take abuse from others because its all we know and can resonate with.

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What is life like existing with trauma? What does it feel like existing with unresolved trauma? What is it like to not be given any compassion, emotional support or guidance whenever a traumatic event would take place? What is it like to not be nurtured, heard or seen for the pain it caused? What is it like to be denied and rejected, with no outlet to speak of these events as a child? What and how did it feel like on the inside of my body? What did it do to my immune system, nervous system, and my brain's