Charting Your Course to New Horizons: Explore and Discover Your Authentic Self

By Colleen Sullivan

‘Charting Your Course to New Horizons’ provides the reader with a structure to develop and build personal life skills using the metaphor of building a sailing craft and going on a journey of self-discovery. The content has been developed from evidence based counselling theory and includes many practical self discovery exercises. Many of the exercises are suitable to be applied in a counselling setting.

The book is of value to readers who want to embark on their own journey of self-discovery, either on their own or in a group setting.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press AU
• Release date: Dec 1, 2021
• ISBN: 9781982291792

Colleen Sullivan

COLLEEN SULLIVAN, a qualified organisational and counseling psychologist, currently practices in Sydney, Australia. She is registered with the Australian Health Practitioner Regulation Agency and the Australian Psychological Society. An educator, she clinically supervises psychologists, psychoanalysts, counsellors, and students. Colleen was born in Zambia, raised in Zimbabwe, and attended university in South Africa, where she earned a BSc in psychology and environmental science, as well as a BA (Hons) and an MA in psychology.

Book preview

Copyright © 2021 Colleen Sullivan.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or

mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the

written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Balboa Press

A Division of Hay House

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.balboapress.com.au

AU TFN: 1 800 844 925 (Toll Free inside Australia)

AU Local: 0283 107 086 ([phone] from outside Australia)

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed

since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do

not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

ISBN: 978-1-9822-9178-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9822-9179-2 (e)

Balboa Press rev. date: 11/25/2021

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To

Faye and

Marie Sullivan

and

Warren Ballantyne, Amy Dobson (nee Ballantyne) and Alistair Ballantyne

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Craig Ballantyne

With gratitude to

Craig Ballantyne

Marie Sullivan

Ken Metelerkamp

Julian Pulvermacher

Rosanne and Hilton Petters

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Craig Ballantyne

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Craig Ballantyne

ENDORSEMENTS

Charting your course to New Horizons is a wonderful tool developed by Colleen Sullivan’s to assist anyone who is interested in getting to know themselves better. Colleen’s workbook provides a key to a personal journey of exploration and reflection on your life’s story, past and present. It is a challenging yet empowering workbook that has the potential to change and strengthen lives for the better. For those who are feeling stuck or off course in life, this book is a great place to begin a new journey.

Wendy Carver CEO LifeLine – Harbor to Hawkesbury

This book arises from Colleen Sullivan’s clinical and teaching experience in the field of applied psychology. Soundly documented and written in an engaging style, it belongs to the self education genre of literature. It is an exceptional tool for the development of the human potential. The principles used cross the boundaries of race, religion, gender, class and culture.

Milton Hook M.A., Ed.D. Sydney

Colleen Sullivan’s inspirational book ‘ Charting Your Course to New Horizons’ is a lighthouse. No matter whether the ocean journey ahead is calm or rocky, a light will shine in your life.

Margaret Wright MSc, UKCP accredited Psychotherapist, Supervisor, London

Colleen provides a good framework for steering candidates into making their own decisions. She knows her material well and asks the right questions. Having been an early participant in her Charting your course to New Horizons I have no hesitation in endorsing Colleen.

John D’Alessandri Partner/Senior Advisor, Sydney

Charting Your Course to New Horizons

Explore and Discover Your Authentic Self

Personal and Professional Development

For further resources and individual and group support visit

www.charting.net.au

www.colleensullivan.net

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CONTENTS

Chapter 1 Point of Departure - Designing and Building Your Sailing Craft: Below the Water Line

Travel Guide

Itinerary

Travel Bag

Viewpoints

Introduction

Journal

Keel: Sense of Purpose/ Meaning

Hull: Beliefs and Values

Rudder: Emotional Awareness

Anchor: Support Crew and Resources

Chapter 2 Designing and Building Your Sailing Craft: Above the Water Line

Introduction

Helm: Rational Thinking

Mast: Self-Esteem

Sails Unfurled: Motivating Factors

Crow’s Nest: Degree of Vision

Cargo: Treasures and/or Burdens

Figurehead: Image or Identity

Flag: Tribe

Compass: Ethical Guide

Chapter 3 Choosing Your Destination and Planning Your Stopovers

Introduction

Criteria for a SMART Goal

On Route Incentives

Pareto’s Principle—The 80:20 Rule

Identifying and Planning to Reach Your Final Ports of Call—A Task Analysis

Choosing between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea - Using a Decision Matrix

The Weather Forecast for the Period

Plotting Your Course and Monitoring Your Progress

Change Personal Habits

Chapter 4 Servicing and Maintaining Your Sailing Craft

Introduction

Stress – Positive and Negative Stressors

Health and Disease

Sense of Control

Accumulative Effect of Stressors

Rejuvenating and Nurturing Your Craft

Adaptive Coping with Stress

Chapter 5 Signals: The Gentle Art of Imparting

Introduction

Your Craft: The Sender and Receiver

The Other Craft: The Intended Recipient

Your Visibility on the Horizon

Negative and Positive Self Thoughts

Body Language

Attitude and Expectation

The Signalling Model - Ship Ahoy!

Chapter 6 Signals

Introduction

Transactional Analysis (TA) Communication Model

The Parent (Hull - Values and Beliefs)

The Adult (Helm - Rational Thinking)

The Child (Rudder – Emotions)

Constructive Communication Transactions

Destructive Communication Transactions

Stages of Constructively Managing Conflict

Chapter 7 Encountering Pirates

Introduction

Battle Tactics: Your Conflict Resolution Style

Your Territory: Assertively Developing Your Personal Boundaries

Strategies for Developing Healthy Boundaries

Manning the Helm: When Our Boundaries Are Challenged

The Power of Silence

Chapter 8 The Compass: Navigating by the Stars – Creativity, Sensuality and Spirituality

Introduction

Creativity Explained Using the Sailing-Craft Analogy

Characteristics Typical of Creative People

The Creative Model as Developed from Csikszentmihalyi’s Research

Sensuality in Relation to Your Sailing Craft

Pillow Talk: Communication and Connection

Barriers to Intimacy

Physical Dimensions of Sex

Introducing Creativity into Your Sexual Expression

Spirituality – Creating a Sense of Meaning in Your Life

Traditional Philosophies

VIEWPOINTS

Chapter 1 Point of Departure - Designing and Building Your Sailing Craft: Below the Water Line

1.1 Activity: Make Your First Journal Entry

1.2 Activity: Explore Your Personal Unique Constructs

1.3 Activity: Plot Your Parents’ Position/Partner’s position on Your Person Constructs Scale

1.4 Reflection: Emotional awareness

1.5 Reflection: Support crew

Chapter 2 Designing and Building Your Sailing Craft: Above the Water Line

2.1 Activity: Determine Your Level of Self-Esteem

2.2 Activity: Review Your Daily Diary for Motivation Levels

2.3 Reflection: Reflect on Your Self-esteem

2.4 Reflection: Reflect on Your Treasures and/or Burdens

2.5 Reflection: Reflect on Your Image or Identity

2.6 Reflection: Flag: Tribe

2.7 Activity: Ethical Guide

2.8 Activity: Design Your craft

Chapter 3 Choosing Your Destination and Planning Your Stopovers

3.1 Activity: Identifying Your Life Dreams

3.2 Activity: Choose and Define Your Six-Week SMART Goal

3.3 Activity: List On Route incentives

3.4 Activity: Plot Your Ports of Call—A Task Analysis

3.5 Activity: Do a Decision Analysis

3.6 Activity: Identify and Plan for Potential Constraints

3.7 Activity: Plot and Monitor Progress of Your Goal

3.8 Activity: Consider How You Spend Your Time and Money

3.9 Activity: Address Your Top Three Time Wasters

3.10 Activity: Develop an Action Plan

Chapter 4 Servicing and Maintaining Your Sailing Craft

4.1 Activity: Review your Sailing Craft

4.2 Activity and Reflection: Draw Your Personal Integration Wheel

4.3 Activity and Reflection: Assess Your Current Level of Stress

4.4 Reflection: Positive Coping Mechanisms in Handling Stress

4.5 Activity: Learning Relaxation Techniques

4.6 Activity: Assess the Impact of Music

4.7 Activity and Reflection: Grounding exercise

4.8 Reflection: Health

Chapter 5 Signals: The Gentle Art of Imparting

5.1 Activity: Draw a Vessel for People You Know Well

5.2 Activity and Reflection: Determine Your Visibility Rating and that of Others

5.3. Activity: Reflection on your visibility rating scale

5.4. Activity: Assess Your Self Thoughts

5.5 Activity: Interpreting Different Types of Body Language

5.6 Activity: Hindering and Enhancing Effective Communication

5.7 Reflection: Wearing another person’s shoes

Chapter 6 Signals

6.1 Activity: Positive and Negative Parent mirrored by the other person

6.2 Activity: Adult to Adult

6.3 Activity: Positive Child to Positive Child

6.4 Activity: Positive Parent to Positive Child

6.5 Activity: Negative Parent to Negative Covert Child

6.6 Activity: Negative Parent to Negative 0vert Child

6.7 Activity: Negative Child to Negative Child

6.8 Activity: Explore the Model from Your Own Experience

Chapter 7 Encountering Pirates

7.1 Activity: Explore Your Natural Conflict-Resolution Style

7.2 Reflection: Your Conflict-Resolution Style

7.3 Activity: Recalling a Situation That Caused You to Feel Angry

Chapter 8 The Compass: Navigating by the Stars – Creativity, Sensuality and Spirituality

8.1 Activity: Stretching Your Creativity

8.2 Activity: Select a Dimension of Your Life for Added Creativity

8.3 Activity: Explore Your Sensuality

8.4 Activity: Enhancing Your Sensual Expression

8.5 Activity: Identifying Barriers to Intimacy

8.6 Activity: Exploring Your Perception of God.

8.7 Activity: Write Your Own Spiritual Manifesto

8.8 Reflection: Transformation

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Craig Ballantyne

1

CHAPTER

Point of Departure - Designing

and Building Your Sailing Craft:

Below the Water Line

Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.

—Carl Jung

Travel Guide

The goal of this travel guide is to assist you, the traveller, in embarking on an adventure on which you will encounter a variety of different terrains. This is achieved by completing several activities and practical experiential exercises. In doing so you will be given the opportunity to revise and learn new life skills that will assist you in reaching your full potential.

Itinerary

In this section, you will be provided with an overview of where this guide and course is planning to take you, and how to use it.

In this chapter, we are going to explore your

Keel: Sense of Purpose

Hull: Beliefs and Values

Rudder: Emotional Awareness

Anchor: Support Crew and Resources

These have been depicted in a model of the Aurora sailing craft.

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Craig Ballantyne

Travel Bag

At the beginning of each section, under Travel Bag, you will find a list of resources that you will need to complete the activities for that particular leg of your journey.

For this section, you will need:

• a journal

• coloured pens

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Craig Ballantyne

Viewpoints

As you progress on your journey you will be given the opportunity to explore the ideas presented by doing several exercises and engaging in personal reflections in your journal. By doing these, you will have the opportunity to integrate the ideas, concepts and theories presented into your life. You have the opportunity to mark each of these off on the Viewpoints page.

Introduction

In this journey, you will be given the opportunity to explore your gifts and talents and learn how to apply them in several scenarios. You will be the captain of your own sailing craft. The model we will be using is that of building a boat and crossing the seas to the desired destination. You will also explore ways of engaging with other travellers, and pirates that you may encounter on your journey. The illustration of the craft outlines the concepts that it represents.

Journal

The purpose of the journal is to allow you to explore freely the thoughts that continuously whirl around in your mind. You will be encouraged to write in it regularly and use it to track your progress. Date your journal entries. This helps you to reflect on certain recurring thoughts and feelings and to perhaps link them to certain events.

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Craig Ballantyne

1.1 Activity: Make Your First Journal Entry

Make the first entry in your journal now. Write down your expectations for this course. At the end of the course, what is a specific and measurable goal that you would like to achieve?

In this section, we are going to explore the essence of your being and how this impacts your outlook on life.