Bff Vs Bae

By Janmejay Singh

In the modern world of complicated love relationships, life turns around for a young, meek, shy Jatt boy residing in the Jatt village of south Delhi when he accidentally meets a posh, sophisticated south Delhi girl in a bizarre accident and how love strikes… But there is one hell of an obstacle that this Jatt boy has to endure… and the obstacle is no one else but the girl’s BFF, who is a sensible, smart, sleek, south Delhi guy and he would leave no stone unturned just to check if the Jatt boy is eligible for his BFF. Here the battle lines are etched as the Jatt boy has to prove his worth not only to the girl he is madly in love with, but also to the girl’s guy BFF. A fun whacky drama ensures between BFF and BAE. Who will the girl choose?? Will it be her BFF or will it be her BAE?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing India
• Release date: Nov 3, 2021
• ISBN: 9781543707809

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Copyright © 2021 by Janmejay Singh.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

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CONTENTS

Preface

Chapter 1     The First Odd Meeting

Chapter 2     Beauty and The Beast

Chapter 3     Side Effects and The Pact

Chapter 4     The Pre Planned Meet

Chapter 5     Not So Official Girlfriend

Chapter 6     Love and The Third Wheel

Chapter 7     Sanju Bravo!!

Chapter 8     Lovesicks

Chapter 9     The Hitch

Chapter 10   Love Wrecks

Chapter 11   All is Bliss

After Five Years- Present

In the loving memory of my adorable friend and roommate Sanju Shaukeen. Your inspiring words have always been my rock solid support even though you aren’t here.

Mohe Mohe Tu rang de basanti

Message for my readers: Folks, Please don’t drink and drive!

PREFACE

T he story is set in posh south Delhi, where a fine line divides the world of snooty, affluent, peerless elite who have stayed there since eternity and the recent Jatt residents. The loud mouthed, brash and crass Jatts bought lands of south Delhi at exorbitant prices and the lavish bungalows, the names of expensive luxury cars which they couldn’t even spell, but were aware that these prerequisites would brand them as high class and rich. But sadly, these Jatts couldn’t adapt themselves to the city life or rather the lifestyle of their more sophisticated neighbours. Sanju, our protagonist, is one such boy who, though having grown up in the rugged Jatt community, is unlike the rest of them. He is shy, docile, mild mannered and doesn’t possess the brash tone or the mannerism, atrocious nature of his other brethren. Sanju is a misfit both in his family and also in the other snooty world of south Delhi. While Reet, daughter of an ex beauty queen and a successful business man is the perfect example of the snootier, posh, articulate, south Delhi fame.

She is the bombshell, toast of the town who either is falling in love or falling out of love quite frequently. Though she has a string of failed relationships, she is hopeful that one day she will get her ishq wala true love. In an unusual turn of events, Sanju’s world collides with Reet. Sanju is scarred by his family celebrating his college graduation success and tries to keep his sanity intact by choosing to be drunk and sitting in isolation at an old monument.

But then he finds Reet sloshed drunk and almost about to trip off the edge. Sanju saves her but eventually lands in a huge mess. Imagine a vernacular, Jatt boy, a semi- conscious drunk girl in a revealing short dress and the streets of Delhi. All perfect ingredients for a disaster to happen.

To add more commotion in this comical disaster Reet’s BFF Priyank enters the picture as he frames Sanju for trying to molest Reet and puts a helpless Sanju behind the bars. Slowly Reet starts taking a fancy of Sanju and plans to use him as a rebound to recover her last breakup while on the other end she promises her BFF Priyank that if she dates any other guy, then it will be Priyank’s full and final decision to check if the guy is worth it or not. So, for Sanju it becomes a mammoth task to impress not only Reet, and make her fall in love but therewith he also has to impress Priyank. Sanju faces the biggest obstacle that every millennial guy will relate to. Sanju has to undergo the boyfriend evaluation test as set by Priyank. Fun, frolic and chaos spreads as the battle lines are etched between Sanju and Priyank, while Reet is at cross roads. She is thoroughly confused if she should adhere to her BFF who is against Sanju but with his own valid reasons, while on the contrary she has actually started falling for Sanju.

Will Reet choose her BAE over her BFF’s disapproval?

OR

Will Reet accept her BFF’s decision of not dating Sanju?

1

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THE FIRST ODD MEETING

S haukeen’s house gets lavishly decorated while a big LED board is put at the grand entrance gate on which it’s etched ‘Sanju’s Engagement Party.’ Sanju’s bouncer brother Vicky keeps advising the workers on the angle they need to place the LED Board.

Soon as evening transcends, guests start flocking into Sanju’s engagement party, while both the families of Sanju and Reet walk in and greet each other. Reet’s parents (Mr and Mrs Mittal) greet Mr and Mrs Shaukeen and the family as they dabble in a conversation, excited and geared up for the engagement party in spite of having humongous differences in their manner of talking, etiquettes and culture clashes. Surprisingly both the families are very happy and excited for the engagement.

Celebrations start in the Shaukeen household with a bang as both the families rejoice with a party song. Sanju dances with vigour and imagines Reet walking down the aisle with him. After the song ends Sanju gets teased by his best friend KD and his elder brother Vicky for finally hitting the jackpot and impressing Reet. After all, a simpleton, Hindi medium guy wooing the strikingly beautiful and most sought-after South Delhi girl is a Herculean task. Sanju has no choice but to blush.

Soon a commotion creeps up. Reet is untraceable. She is not present at the party while her parents swear the last time they had seen their daughter she was prepping up to go to the parlour. Everyone looked around for her, but in futility. Did Reet actually run away from her engagement? Has she changed her mind?

A hushed-up banter creeps between Sanju and Reet’s parents where Sanju’s father Mr. Rajbeer Shaukeen cribs at how this hasn’t happened for the first time, and as per his experience, all South Delhi girls are unpredictable and can do anything outrageous.

Sanju here decides to take the matter in his own hands as he now speeds up in his swanky convertible towards Reet’s house and barges into her room only to find her engagement trousseau spread over the bed, and her room in a complete mess, while her phone lies on the floor. Sanju is shocked and paranoid, as he takes the phone and notices the last call that Reet has received is that of her best friend forever, Priyank.

Holy shit!! Did Priyank again try to break up his love story with Reet! Oh shit!! Sanju mumbles, I should have never trusted Priyank. He has always been the villain in my love story. Sanju grinds his teeth looking furious as he dials the phone number.

FIVE YEARS BACK

Fortyfive percent in humanities accredited with the pass status. While his fellow friends reveled in bliss and broke into a dance amidst the sprawling DU campus celebrating that their bro, their buddy, had passed his graduation with flying colours, Sanju Shaukeen stood embarrassed. His jet black eyes were looking a tad red; trying to hide them under his tinted sunnies, a tear still glides down his fair and rosy cheeks. He hangs his head down for two minutes trying to clench his fist, imagining the laudable amount of effort he had put into studying for his graduation exams.

He had memorised long English phrases, mugged up historical dates while gulping the special Ayurvedic memory booster which his mother Bobo Shaukeen had ordered online in bulk. His intense efforts also included long hours of burning the midnight lamp, religiously attending all the lectures, taking tuitions and was even admired by lecturers for his sincerity and diligence.

Even on the examination day, he was ecstatic that he wrote brilliantly. Seventy per cent minimum was his expected percentage. He even had visualized himself being the first Jatt boy in his family who could score such a decent percentage. Imagine the delight on his face as he thought he gave his best shot in English. He would have been valued as one alien Jatt boy with excellent English communication and writing skills. How could he have broken down the stigma, yes the social stigma attached to the Jatt men? Jatts who are considered not just bad dancers, but also lacking basic social etiquettes and then the English language barrier. It’s being hilariously discussed that Jatts are the stereotypical bad boys. They are perceived as the ones who defy laws (including legal), have a nasty temper, are ill-mannered and just sheer bullies.

Damn! Sanju ushered such a big social responsibility on his not-so-muscular arms. In fact, he loved being lean. He worked so meticulously to tarnish the social stigma that his community faced for ages. But here he is. This forty five percent broke his heart. He wished to be the change and the trend setter. Though now his grades are sort of demoralising him.

Sanju definitely is an alien Jatt boy born in a quintessential Jatt family who rocked such good fortunes in Meerut, that they instantly moved into one of the posh, sophisticated, ultra-rich worlds of South Delhi. Rajbeer Shaukeen always wondered what was wrong with his younger son Sanju. Sanju never loved wrestling, in fact he hated mud and sweat so much, that he would simply hide when his friends KD, Rocky, and Gippy used to come to their house. Sanju instead loved spending time with his elder sisters Sapna and Neeta who used to narrate random stories, tie pony tails while Sanju waved his beautiful mane and even rushed up to help his mother Bobo cooking in the kitchen. He hated it when someone spoke loudly, couldn’t bear the anguish and would break into tears looking scared. While Rajbeer his father used to exclaim:

"Jatts speak in this volume only. It’s normal. O h damn! You sissy pants!"

Rajbeer kept consulting many astrologers, querying for a remedy to make Sanju manly and macho as per the standards of the Jatt community. Sanju’s soft spoken nature, his preference of reading story books, spending time with his sisters and mother, caring about his lustrous mane, not willing to go outside and play in the sun, good academic results and being a teacher’s pet gave Rajbeer many crazy nights.

Well the grandeur of macho manhood has been made so stifling in our society that it’s very difficult for a young boy to aspire for what he really wants. Yes Sanju isn’t the typical boy, but if we keep aside the prescribed gender roles, then there is nothing even slightly wrong, suspicious, or alien about him.

To escape the so-called society prescribed roles and his father’s snarling temper, Sanju used to sneak inside his comfort zone: his room where he got engrossed in the world of storytelling. Very soon his friends KD, Rocky, Gippy too became enchanted, enamoured with Sanju’s story telling acts.

Sanju could envision a dream world, fit in some characters, spell a journey of the characters which sounded and looked very appealing and convincing to his friends. Sanju became their hero, their entertainer, also the one who could write great pick-up lines, romantic poetry to woo pretty girls of the South Delhi locality.

But surprisingly even the sophisticated, articulate, posh world of South Delhi colonies still had its own ways of judging the Jatts who despite being Stinking rich, possessing the swankiest cars and coolest gadgets, were regarded as down market, uneducated buffoons.

The so-called South Delhiites had refused to welcome the Jatts into their lavish and glittering world. So, when Sanju and his friends got enrollment in one of the elite schools in their neighbourhood, they were mocked by their biased classmates.

Ultimately the Jatt boys bonded with only those of their community. Again, this was another discrimination that Sanju as well his closest buddies had faced.

Sanju couldn’t understand back then also why his English speaking skills became a matter of good laugh among his other classmates. He thought he was exceptionally good, even scored decent marks in English but then when it was time for some conversation, or a debate in English, he developed cold feet.

This passed on to his college days too, despite achieving good marks and making it to the much coveted Delhi University which was a massive achievement for him as well his family, Sanju barely could hold a conversation with the other acclaimed DU haughty, famous crowd. He could not muster any courage to speak to any girl of his college for they all had endless famous, elite boyfriends. Sanju was dull and pathetic for these girls.

Sanju being Sanju took it in his own stride and kept concentrating on his studies, not giving a damn about these girls though the entire university flocked after them. But lol! Rajbeer and Bobo got their biggest shock, almost like a trauma. Their younger son is not seeing any girl.

Why is Sanju not pursuing any girl? Neither does he tease girls or even pass a lewd comment? What kind of a Jatt boy is he? Rajbeer’s questions seemed relentless, countless as he kept discussing this with Bobo.

Even the so- called discussions of their son being homosexual also crossed their minds which made Sanju even more rattled. To make matters even worse Sanju puked when his cousins forcibly made him just sniff alcohol, forget drinking it.

How Sanju wished he could have shut everyone’s mouth with exceptional grades in his graduation exams, and then finally muster up the courage to tell his whole gigantic family that there is nothing wrong in him. They should accept him the way he is while finally explaining to his father that he has no wish to run their family’s age-old business of plastic manufacturers but be a writer. Yes, a writer.

Sanju knew his family would burst into peals of laughter, as if he had cracked a big joke while his father would tear him apart, yes literally into shreds. That could be the silliest thing ever to reveal to a Jatt father. Maybe his father could plan to disown him. But no! He was determined this time. Alas! His plans failed. A miserable forty five percent seems to have ruined his life.

While a cloud of sorrow dabbled Sanju’s mind, KD, Gippy and Rocky quickly grabbed him from behind, screaming in joy and continuing their mad caper dance. Sanju shrugs them off as he storms towards his grand Audi that his father had gifted him after his higher secondary exams.

Did you just see what happened? KD screams looking totally wide eyed at Gippy and Rohan. Sanju pushed us away with full force like one terminator. Like Hulk.

Bewildered Rocky and Rohan blurted out, "Raj uncle should have seen this. He would be so delighted today. Imagine Sanju on the first brink of aggression. He did push us away like one of those tough Arnold Sch..war…zen…egger… OK! OK! That’s enough. I can’t pronounce more than that.

You understood KD right?"

KD snaps back, of course. I have even watched all those Hollywood films and that too without subtitles. Gippy and Rohan are amazed for a moment, marvelling at each other’s Hollywood film trivia… But then a screeching sound of a car is heard.

Oh shit!! Is it really Sanju who drove the car like a maniac?

Yes indeed. Today has been a breakthrough day. Sanju fuming with anger is the rarest scene that ever happened in history, driving the car at jet speeds almost as if he flew an airplane.

After twenty failed attempts to get a driving license, Sanju’s driving skills were also a subject of mockery among his own cousins in the Shaukeen family. For Rajbeer, Sanju bought the ultimate shame when he finally learned to drive the car but at snail’s speed, so much that bicyclists would wave at him while he pleasantly smiled at them and let them have their way. He always followed the traffic guidelines and at times even helped the traffic police in controlling traffic as well as the snarling traffic goers off Delhi roads.

Amidst the flaring traffic Sanju drove his Audi at such a pace that he did not even care for the police blaring sirens almost like the mad max fury. Not even wasting a second, the police jeep braced up to follow Sanju’s Audi and kept trying to stop him.

Meanwhile the Shaukeen family are amazed to hear about Sanju’s results. Rajbeer and Bobo quickly use their smartphones to spread this news. Soon all the whatsapp chats of humongous relatives get flooded with Sanju’s remarkable achievement. Well it certainly is. Sanju had become the first ever guy in the family to score forty five percent grade in graduation exams, and that too from Delhi University. Bobo reprimands her husband, Didn’t I tell you Our Sanju is pure gold.

Even in three decades none of your family members have ever achieved such a status. Look what he has done today. Ain’t you proud?? I am sure all your relatives must also be now brimming with jealousy. We need to throw a lavish surprise party tonight. It should be top secret.

Rajbeer smiles at his wife, fondly puts an arm on her neck exclaiming his happiness. You are right my dear. A party is so due for our son. But you know what news made me the happiest?

Bobo stares at her husband, blankly raising her eyebrows. Rajbeer comments, Sanju drove the car at exemplary speed like almost 100 km per hour. while the police kept chasing him. This is totally phenomenal. It’s just double happiness that god has gifted us today.

At one of the crossroads Sanju gets fined