Dismal Clouds, Silver Linings

By Chloe Harrington

A story wrote from the point of view of an innocent child growing up in an alcoholic, abusive environment, to a Teenage girl fleeing the insanity of home.

This book goes in-depth about escaping abusive relationships, the effects it's had upon the victims through the eyes of a child, a mother & a wife.

Finally the Author takes you on a journey along the paths of survival.

Learning to heal, to learn from life's experiences eventually leading to the discovery of the woman, she has become today.

‘No one wanders through life dodging raindrops.

However, it's a wonderful feeling to dance in those puddles. Screaming I have survived.'

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris UK
• Release date: Aug 27, 2020
• ISBN: 9781664112476

Book preview

Copyright © 2020 by Chloe Harrington.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 08/27/2020

Xlibris

UK TFN: 0800 0148620 (Toll Free inside the UK)

UK Local: 02036 956328 ([phone] from outside the UK)

www.Xlibrispublishing.co.uk

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CONTENTS

Dedication

Preface

Authors Note

Chapter 1 In the Beginning

Chapter 2 From a Frying Pan, Straight into a Fire

Chapter 3 Learning to Learn and Survive

Chapter 4 Fool’s Gold

Chapter 5 I Love You This Much

Chapter 6 Fighting to Survive

Chapter 7 Discovering the Strength Within!

Chapter 8 Moving Forward

DEDICATION

This book is dedicated to my beautiful, inspirational children, who have always given me the courage, hope, positivity, and inspiration to fight for what I believe in and who have given me the passion and strength not only to write this book but also to look beyond the dark, dismal clouds in life, in not only hope but belief of brighter days to come.

To my wonderfully supportive family, who have always been there, for my children and me.

To all my friends, the people I have chosen to have in my life. I am as equally blessed as you who chose to have me in yours J

I could never name you all. But a huge token of appreciation is granted towards you all.

You are, after all, the people who have helped, supported, and encouraged me so far in my life; dried my tears; and reminded me of who I am.

The girl everyone knows and loves, so thank you for being in my life.

Last of all but not the least, I’d like to thank and praise god. Thank you for always walking with me, for carrying me through the really tough times, and for gracing me with all the wonderful gifts day to day.

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PREFACE

My life has been one big learning curve,

I, for one, embrace it.

The one thing I will stand by and declare is

When my day eventually comes, many years from now, I hope!

I could never ever regret one minute of any hour, or indeed, any god given day.

I will never regret the lessons I have learned.

When my day eventually dawns, I will gladly take with me

The love I have been truly blessed, to receive.

The sorrows, which have whole-heartedly taught me to embrace joy.

Along with the failures I have achieved,

Which in turn have taught me, to fight only for, success.

Along with the precious memories of my angelic children, who give me life.

Love to love with

Inspiration to hold dear

Fight to fight with

Energy to be.

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AUTHORS NOTE

The author wishes to acknowledge that although this story is based on true events, the names of all characters are fictional, In order to respectfully protect the Privacy and indeed dignity of others.

A story wrote from the point of view of an innocent child growing up in an alcoholic, abusive environment, to a teenage girl fleeing the insanity of home.

This book goes in-depth about escaping abusive relationships, the effects it’s had upon the victims through the eyes of a child, a mother & a wife.

Finally the Author takes you on a journey along the paths of survival,

Learning to heal, to learn from life’s experiences eventually leading to the discovery of the woman, she has become today.

‘No one wanders through life dodging raindrops.

However, it’s a wonderful feeling to dance in those puddles. Screaming I have survived.’

(Chloe Harrington 2010)

CHAPTER 1

In the Beginning

Chloe sat there in the shadows dreading the sound of drunken footsteps on the stairs and those horrible raised offensive and argumentative voices. She clung to her teddy, her only friend in the world. Every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday nights, they’d drink and fight; some fights worse than the others.

Would Chloe wake up to see broken glass again in the morning, whose photos would have been burnt the previous night in her mother’s drunken rage?. What new marks would dad carry in the morning? Would she miss school the next day, because mum’s hangover was too heavy to take her yet again?

The next day was Monday, her favourite day. She loved the normality of school—seeing her friends again and playing like a normal little girl and singing and dancing merrily, without being told to shut up or sit still. Chloe’s teacher Mrs Kimbers was a lovely, warm, gentle, encouraging, patient lady. She always helped Chloe when she was stuck, with spelling her name or her math’s. She would never scream, shout, or tell Chloe to go away. Chloe felt comfortable asking her for help. At school, Chloe never got into trouble, or was shouted at as much as she was at home. Chloe loved her baby brother and sister, but she always got the blame for their noise, their mess, and their everything.

Chloe’s mum never drove; she walked everywhere, with four children in tow. Even as babies, the children were dragged up and down by their mother to school in all kinds of weather to drop and collect Evelyn, Chloe’s older sister. Chloe would be in the buggy, with her younger sister. Once her baby brother arrived, Chloe had to walk or run behind so that her baby brother and sister could have the buggy.

Chloe’s big sister Evelyn was lovely. She was so popular at school; everyone loved her and some of her friends had brothers or sisters of Chloe’s age too.

Evelyn always looked after Chloe. She told Chloe, before she started school, that the teachers were lovely, and they’d love Chloe. Evelyn helped to get Chloe ready for school: she’d braid her hair, which Chloe loved. Their mum always said her hair looked as if the rats were sucking it.

When Evelyn braided it, it looked tidy. She didn’t pull her hair as she ran the brush through it, like mum, complaining about the knots and pulling the lumps out. Evelyn always got her buttons right too. Chloe always messed them up, and her mum would shout at her. Evelyn always tied her tie gently; she never pulled it up to the top like mum. She always left enough room, so Chloe could swallow or giggle. Chloe giggled so much at school. She hated going home. Secretly, Chloe wished Mrs Kimbers were her mum.

About six months after Chloe started school, she was asked to write a piece about herself. Chloe struggled. She wanted to write as follows: ‘My name is Chloe. I am five, and I am a naughty girl. I make my mum cry and drink, just because I was born’.

After a while, Chloe’s teacher came over, but Chloe had written nothing. She was scared that Mrs Kimbers might shout. Instead, Mrs Kimbers put her arm round Chloe saying, ‘What’s wrong, Chloe?. You look sad.’

‘I can’t do it. I always spell my name wrong, and I’m silly.’ Chloe began to cry.

‘That’s OK, Chloe. We learn to spell only when we make mistakes and someone shows us the right way to do it.’

‘I don’t know what to say, Miss.’

‘Well, tell me about you—what you look like, what you like, your favourite colour or food.’

‘I don’t know, miss. I don’t know what I look like. I know mummy always screams at me for having a dirty face and hands.’

Mrs Kimbers pulled up a chair and sat beside Chloe; Chloe giggled. Mrs Kimbers looked funny; she was so big and squashed up, like a caterpillar in a cocoon, in the small chair.

‘I tell you what, draw yourself, Chloe. Your face is lovely and clean now. I can see you have long, pretty brown hair, with bits of orange in it. We call that auburn. You have big blue eyes, with a little bit of yellow, just like the sun in the sky. You have a lovely, big smile and lovely white teeth. You also have pretty little freckles on your cheeks that come out in the sun, just above your dimples.’

‘What are freckles and dimples, Miss?’ Chloe asked.

Mrs Kimbers replied, ‘Freckles are little brown dots on your cheek, and dimples are little indents that show when you smile.’ Chloe smiled at Mrs Kimbers and giggled. ‘Oh, I thought they were felt tip marks I drew on me.’

Mrs Kimbers giggled back, ‘No Chloe.