Streetcar Sandwiches

By Curtis Orloff

Streetcar Sandwiches is a screenplay showing the efforts the owner of a sandwich shop in Uptown New Orleans undertakes to keep her business running. Not only does she have to deal with a menagerie of all types of employees, she has to comply with onerous and often conflicting regulations from several government bureaus. How she handles what turns into an ordeal threatens to change her naturally optimistic and pleasant personality. It leads directly to an outcome that could only have occurred in the Big Easy.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Sep 21, 2018
• ISBN: 9781546260790

Curtis Orloff

Curtis Orloff is an oilfield geologist whose background was devoid of snobbery. The vicissitudes of the oil industry saw him alternately wearing a suit in a downtown office, coveralls in deserts and jungles, and the uniform of a utility company employee, reading meters. In one downturn, he taught special needs children. In another, he peeled shrimp and delivered po’boys in New Orleans. It was then he saw the drama and comedy on display in a popular sandwich shop. He worked with colorful people from all walks of life while getting to know the business and the problems the owner had to deal with. Ultimately, he returned to the oil industry and did so well he bought into the business. That it went bankrupt did not diminish the glowing memories of all he saw and experienced, as well as of the people he met. The fact all involved were Orleanians ensured they landed on their feet, including the author, who made the city his adopted home.

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Streetcar Sandwiches

Curtis Orloff

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© 2018 Curtis Orloff. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse  09/20/2018

ISBN: 978-1-5462-6080-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5462-6078-3 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5462-6079-0 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2018911123

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

NEW ORLEANS FRENCH QUARTER–DAY, 2005

Camera opens on Jackson Square during a slight rain.

The camera follows a hansom on St. Peter’s as it passes Jackson Square and turns left on Royal. It pans ahead of the buggy to Canal Street, where it follows a streetcar down St. Charles, past Lee Circle and the summer foliage suffusing the Garden District and Uptown mansions. The streetcar passes by Tulane to the bend at South Carrollton, where a dented convertible with a ragtop pulls up next to it. The neighborhood starts to deteriorate with abandoned buildings and crumbling sidewalks. Side by side, the streetcar and convertible pass a small restaurant on the opposite side of the road. The car turns left at a side street, crosses the tracks behind the trolley, travels another block before making a left opposite a sprawling trolley barn, and then heads into a parking lot.

PARKING LOT—DAY

The camera follows Susan Branson, a youthful-looking middle-aged woman, as she parks her dented old car in the only space available in the public lot. Half the lot is empty, given over to different colored handicap spots, each color representative of the degree of infirmity. The drizzle increases into rain. The collapsible umbrella she opens breaks. She passes signs saying Stay on the right side of the sidewalk, Fine for littering, and Smile, share your happiness. A poster implores people to reelect the incumbent state senator, bragging how his constituents haven’t suffered in the current slow economy. Another shows Uncle Sam asking all citizens to sacrifice for your country. The sidewalk is in ill repair.

She passes by a boarded-up former bank building and two businesses claiming to be going bankrupt. She turns the corner onto South Carrollton. There are four tables outside her colorful sandwich shop, each sheltered by large umbrellas. A sign on the window indicates they represent the Smoking Section. Susan pauses in front of the glass door to fix her thick gray-streaked black hair. Signs cover the doorway cautioning patrons to watch their step. A delivery boy loaded with orders rushes out the door.

INTERIOR OF STREETCAR SANDWICHES—DAY

The lobby is crammed with customers, sitting on stools lining the walls or waiting in line in front of the cash register. The floor needs sweeping, and the counters need bussing. Susan stops to collect a plastic tray left by a patron and to inspect the shelves of local sauces and condiments. She passes through the double doors leading into the food preparation area, where workers are frantically preparing sandwiches, and Juanita, the black middle-aged day manager, is talking on the phone. She is patiently trying to soothe a customer.

JUANITA

We do the best we can, sir.

John is Susan’s former boyfriend; they started the business together after graduating from the University of Wisconsin; he is busy behind the counter.

JOHN

Tell him we don’t discriminate here. Everyone gets his food cold when it rains (he laughs).

SUSAN

That’s not what the caller wants to hear.

JOHN

Someone getting a cold sandwich is the least of our worries.

Susan gingerly takes the phone from Juanita and holds her hand over the receiver.

SUSAN

Did someone from the city come by this morning?

JOHN

No one had to come by.

SUSAN

Don’t be so negative. That new rule is not etched in stone, or we’d already be labeled a Culturally Defined Business.

JOHN

Name a rule that got interpreted the way we’d like.

SUSAN

(talking into the phone)

I’m awfully sorry. Our delivery boy won’t charge you if he’s really late or if the sandwich is cold.

JOHN

We don’t need anyone’s help ruining our business. We can do it fine ourselves.

Susan ignores John and turns to Elaine.

Elaine is of Irish descent. She works part-time while attending community college.

SUSAN

No, honey, use guacamole dip on that kind of sandwich.

ELAINE

You should make handouts on how to make all these.

SUSAN

That’s a super idea. I’ll write one up as soon as I return home.

JOHN

Yeah, and if you have any time left over, you might want to figure out why we have to bend over backward to stay in business. That new regulation. I don’t know.

Susan grabs a fresh roll of paper towels and Windex and rushes into the lobby to clean the windows.

SUSAN

We’ll figure out something.

John’s wife, Mary, is operating the cash register.

MARY

Maybe we can prove we’re not part of the kind of community the rule talks about.

She turns to stare directly into the eyes of an indecisive customer.

MARY

So that will be one barbecue chicken breast?

MALE CUSTOMER

I guess.

MARY

And a large Coke?

MALE CUSTOMER

Sure.

MARY

With chips?

MALE CUSTOMER

I don’t know.

MARY

Plain or Cajun flavored?

MALE CUSTOMER

Cajun.

Mary looks to the next person in line.

MARY

And what would you like?

Sitting on the food-warming box located next to the cash register is Bobby, Mary and John’s preschooler. He is wearing a cowboy hat and playing with a toy horse.

BOBBY

Get along, little doggie.

Gabriella is a young woman from Guatemala. She does not have proper documentation and probably