Elizabeth’s Song: One Family’s Journey Through Autism

By Dr. David A. Bishop

For more than eight years, author Dr. David A. Bishop and his family struggled to get answers for their daughter, Elizabeth, who was diagnosed with autism at only a year and a half old.

 

Autism is a condition approaching epidemic proportions. It has become so pervasive most public schools today have entire classrooms dedicated to teaching autistic children. Despite this prevalence, support, education, health care, and legal support have lagged. Autism is poorly understood by most people, yet just about everyone knows of a family or child afflicted with it. 

 

In Elizabeth’s Song, Bishop narrates their saga of love, tears, and hope, sharing the lessons they learned about handling common issues, such as health care, insurance, and educational needs. A how-to guide to also dealing with the emotional aspects of autism, it provides support, strength, and hope in the form of pertinent scripture and testimony of the endless blessing of God’s love.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: May 1, 2018
• ISBN: 9781973624103

Dr. David A. Bishop

Dr. David A. Bishop earned a bachelor’s degree in computer engineering from the Georgia Institute of Technology and an MBA and doctorate in business administration from Georgia State University. He has worked as a technologist, speaker, teacher, and consultant for more than twenty-five years for several major corporations. Bishop and his wife, Deborah, have been married for seventeen years and have a ten-year-old daughter with autism.

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Copyright © 2018 Dr. David A. Bishop.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

The information, ideas, and suggestions in this book are not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice. Before following any suggestions contained in this book, you should consult your personal physician. Neither the author nor the publisher shall be liable or responsible for any loss or damage allegedly arising as a consequence of your use or application of any information or suggestions in this book.

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Unless otherwise stated, scripture quotations are from the ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked (NIV) are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™

ISBN: 978-1-9736-2409-7 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-2408-0 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9736-2410-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2018903696

WestBow Press rev. date: 4/30/2018

To my wife, Deborah, and my beautiful daughter, Elizabeth Dorothy.

Contents

Introduction Why I Wrote This Book

Chapter 1 The Happiest Day of My Life

Chapter 2 Signs

Chapter 3 The Diagnosis

Chapter 4 Going to the Altar with Pastor Mike

Chapter 5 The Witch Doctor

Chapter 6 Vaccinations

Chapter 7 Therapists

Chapter 8 The DAN! Protocol

Chapter 9 Insurance Headaches

Chapter 10 The Neurologist

Chapter 11 The Lawsuit

Chapter 12 Mitochondrial Disease

Chapter 13 Feeding Problems, Bad Behaviors, and Worries

Chapter 14 Family

Chapter 15 Special Schools

Chapter 16 Public School

Chapter 17 Finding Another Special School

Chapter 18 Finding the Right Church

Chapter 19 Elizabeth’s Singing

Chapter 20 Elizabeth’s Love and Sweet Spirit

Chapter 21 God Has a Plan

Chapter 22 Taking Care of Yourself

Chapter 23 Hope for the Future

References

Introduction

Why I Wrote This Book

If you have picked up this book, chances are good that you or someone you love has autism. Autism is a condition that affects as many as one in eighty children; it is approaching epidemic proportions. Autism is a complex neurobiological condition that lasts a lifetime, affecting a person’s ability to communicate and relate to others. Referred to as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), the condition’s severity can vary widely, from very mild to extremely debilitating. At the same time, resources to support parents and children coping with the condition fall far short of what is needed. Educational, medical, and insurance support are often inadequate or completely nonexistent. Being primarily classified as a mental condition, autism does not get the attention, coverage, or support that other problems do. Although it affects more children than HIV, diabetes, and pediatric cancer combined, autism has far less research funding, community support, and medical assistance than each of those conditions. Even though autism is becoming more commonplace, the public at large still poorly understands it. This is all changing for the better, but progress is slow.

Autism is a tough row to hoe because it often makes you feel as though everyone has failed you. As a parent or relative of an autistic child, you may feel the whole world is against you—your doctors fail you, teachers and educators fail you, the legal system fails you, and sometimes it feels as if your own family fails you. There have been times when my wife and I were at our wits’ end. Working to make sure your child is getting the best therapy, medical care, and educational assistance in addition to dealing with the day-to-day struggles of managing autism can be exhausting. With a condition that is poorly understood by even the experts, the unknowns can make it very difficult to determine if you are doing the best for your child. Our minds often swirled with questions: Is this the right therapy? Is this the best medical approach? Is this the best school? What are the teachers really doing with our child daily? Are we trained well enough to deal with the problems at home? Is our child progressing or regressing? What will happen as our child gets older? Is our child eating enough? What caused this? Was it our fault? These questions can eat away at you to the point of making yourself physically ill.

As I researched, I found that many parents in our situation were so beleaguered they had begun questioning their faith. I wrote this book for them, for you. I’m here to tell you that no matter how bad things get, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. There is joy to be had in your life with your child. God does have a plan, a destination. But getting there sometimes takes a little help and understanding—understanding that you may not be getting from anyone else, that can only be found with others who have had the same experiences. As a result, to make this book as valuable to you as possible, I have not pulled any punches. I’m sharing with you the raw feelings and experiences that any parent in this position would. If I didn’t, my account would appear fake, as if I didn’t really experience what you are experiencing or as if I didn’t have it quite as bad, thereby invalidating my advice. No, my story is real, my friend. I’m sharing this experience with you in the hopes that you will not only find some good advice for dealing with common problems associated with autism but that it will also give you comfort and hope.

1

The Happiest Day of My Life

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.

—Psalm 127:3

D ebbie and I had always wanted children. It was in our plan. We had visions of two—a boy and a girl—although we would have been happy with whatever God provided. During the early years of our marriage, we just let things flow naturally, without any kind of timeline. We spent the first few years getting to know each other, traveling, and experiencing life.

However, we had both hit thirty by the time we were married, and time flies fast. Unfortunately, our bodies have only so much time to produce healthy children. This is particularly true with women. Although women can certainly have children well into their forties, doctors typically consider their pregnancies high-risk once they’re over thirty-five. By the time we reached our midthirties, we began to have some concern and decided to have ourselves checked.

At first, due to our insurance restrictions, we had to go through several steps and tests before any action could be taken. The HMO made my wife in particular step through one test after another, most of which were inconclusive or ambiguous: Well, there could be an issue here, but we have to run yet another test.

After we had exhausted the HMO process, the gynecologist was able to give us a referral to a reproductive specialist, who turned out to be a fantastic doctor. This guy really knew his stuff. He was blunt and direct, but he got things fixed quickly. I had some pain myself, which he fixed with a ten-second suggestion. He then checked my wife and found that she had a polyp in her uterus that needed to be removed. It was keeping fertilized eggs from sticking to her uterine wall.

After a relatively simply laparoscopy to remove it, the doctor told us we’d be pregnant in about three months. I highly doubted him. Really? I thought. How could he give such a guarantee? But sure enough, by the third month, my wife noticed that her period had stopped for a while. She thought nothing of it at first, because it wasn’t entirely unusual for her to be late. But when she took a pregnancy test, we were delighted. We did it twice just to be sure. I still remember the disbelief in my wife’s eyes. I’d never seen them bug out like that. We were both so happy. Getting pregnant isn’t easy for everyone, and for those who have struggled, it is indeed a very exciting and joyful event. So many people take for granted the gift of a new life.

During the next few months, we prepared as any new parents would by getting the nursery together, buying clothes and toys, and preparing for the big day. Debbie’s pregnancy was relatively uneventful, with no real problems or concerns.

Debbie’s pregnancy ran a bit late, and she was eventually induced. I was apprehensive about the process but also somewhat relieved that we could plan our birth without having to undergo the stress of racing to the hospital.

I opted to sit in on the birth of our daughter. It was truly the happiest and most exhilarating moment of my life. Watching a live birth is like nothing else. Excitement, tension, happiness, and fear are all present in the room. The doctor and nurse watched me like a hawk as I tried to comfort my wife. They seemed to be keeping as much of an eye on me as they were her. They thought I would pass out or vomit at the scene, and honestly I had to close my eyes a bit during part of it.

When Elizabeth left her mother’s womb, they cleaned