Ria’s baby joy ‘My sister’s selfless act’
When I sat down with Woman at the end of last year, I was ready to talk about my long battle with infertility. In fact, I was more than ready.
After six years of trying for a baby, I still did not have one in my arms, and I wanted to start a conversation about that reality.
I have never really understood the taboo around discussing female reproductive health, and the secrecy that surrounds it left me feeling like a failure. But just because my body wasn’t doing what it was designed to do, surely that didn’t make me any less of a woman?
We don’t talk about infertility, but it is so common. As many as one in four New Zealanders experience issues when trying to conceive, and of those that do manage this feat, one in five pregnancies will end in miscarriage before 20 weeks. And believe me, after a miscarriage or an unsuccessful round of IVF, you need your community more than ever. They will help pull you through the desperate loneliness you feel.
So I wanted to talk about it. I wanted to show that the often devastating fertility journey doesn’t always have a happy ending, and that’s OK, too; to show that there is more to being a woman than bearing a child, no matter how desperately every fibre of your being wants it.
I know that stories of women – celebrity or otherwise – proudly showing their baby bumps or cuddling their
