Seasons out of Time

By Renu Thomas

This is a fascinating tale of three girls who encountered amazing adventures as young teenagers, shared beautiful moments, and had a great sense of camaraderie. But as they embark on a journey of life, they encounter a chain of events that change their lives for the better or worse.

It is a tale of the rewards , the medley of emotions they experience, the constraints they face, and the perils of breaking free from the past that finally shape their passage to independence.

Both of you are at the cusp of an exciting stage. Things are not so rosy for me. I am depressed by this dull and weary life was what a young girl, Anne, had told her smart city-bred friends.

Anne did not complain and did not feel sorry for herself. She danced when the sun shone, lay low in winter, collected colorful fall leaves in autumn, enjoyed her walk in the spring. She enjoyed the seasons of her life.

Her friends Meena and Sunita chose to liberate themselves from the marriage to seek adventure, freedom, and independence, but were they jeopardizing everything they had?

The journey of life of these three girls is filled with a magical mosaic of love ,friendship ,betrayal, despair, and hope. We are shown how, when encountering struggle and dealing with our inner conflicts, we learn important lessons that are sometimes bitter and sometimes sweet.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing India
• Release date: Feb 10, 2018
• ISBN: 9781543701616

Renu Thomas

Renu Thomas is a teacher of English and has been teaching in schools across India, the UK ,the Middle East and the Far East. She has completed her schooling and college in Chennai and Kolkatta and holds a Post graduate degree from Jawaharlal Nehru University, New Delhi. Seasons Out of Time is her debut novel.

Book preview

Copyright © 2018 by Renu Thomas.

ISBN:                   Hardcover                   978-1-5437-0163-0

                            Softcover                     978-1-5437-0162-3

                            eBook                         978-1-5437-0161-6

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CONTENTS

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

PART 1

S unita was going to an unknown destination. She had been picked up from Kottayam station by a charming sister and she had absolutely no idea as to what was happening to her life. She was in a state of uncertain wretchedness mingled with a feeling of hideous doubt. It had remained like this for sometime. They passed the town, the driver stopped the van, in front of a big shop. The serene looking sister smiled at Sunita and asked her if she felt okay. Suni nodded and gave her a faint smile. Her face mirrored a look of fear and unutterable sorrow. She must have been a touching sight—a young, charming lady who looked weak, wretched and lost. One man got into the van. He had a big sack, which was full of things. They drove on. Suddenly, the landscape began to change. She saw hills in the distance, they descended into a valley covered with thick woods. Sunita fell into a deep sleep. She heard a wild wind and woke up with a start. As the car drove up the meandering road, Sunita got a full view of the rolling plains. It was past evening, when they reached the convent in Vagamon –a very small town near Kottayam. She was ushered into a parlour- a small but tastefully done up room, the door opened and a stern looking sister walked in. She held her hand and smiled at Sunita, Hello, how are you? You look tired? Sunita did not say anything but smiled at her.

She was led into a room by another equally stern looking sister. It was a small room which comprised of a cot, a cupboard, a table and a chair. The room was small, but the view from the room was breathtaking. She was well pleased with the room. She looked with bewilderment around the room and had not the faintest clue as to what was going to happen to her or what she was going to do with her life in this remote place. She showered, rested and was taken into the dining room, which had long tables and benches. The place was teeming with sisters dressed in white surge, young ones, middle aged ones and old ones and it seemed to Sunita that all the sisters of the world had united here and had nothing to lose in their lives. Kanji and lentils were served on the table. Sunita drank water. Fatigue and uncertainity had rendered her incapable of eating or talking to anyone in the room. She was glad to be back in her room. She closed the window and sitting down upon the bed thought of the life that was before her. Sleep eluded her that night and all kinds of thoughts whizzed past her mind, but, of late, she had cultivated the habit of suppressing any memory -bitter or sweet, that had seemed to haunt her. She fell into a deep sleep only to be awakened by a knock at her door. She had a prostrating headache and she knew that it was because of the strain of the previous day. She washed, dressed and went into a room for the morning prayers. After breakfast she was summoned into the office and business had started in full swing. The senior sister with a comely face and figure spoke at length about the convent, its functions and duties of each sister and volunteer in the convent. You are in charge of the academics. You see, mol, all these children are orphans here, destitutes, who come here with no hope in life and it is up to us to show love and care so as to ensure that they can find their place in the world. We will show you around, believe me, you will love this place. We have a children’s home where we provide food, clothing and medicine.

Sunita gave a wry smile and the rigmarole continued.

You must have seen fruit trees, orchard and a dairy farm. We are self sufficient. There is a home which houses the single women, the widows, who work in the kitchens making jam, fruit preserves and these products are sold in the market. There is a huge demand for them. We also have an embroidery section where these women produce some exquisite needlework on bedspreads, table linen, sarees. We are all mothers to the children, sisters to the women and dedicate our lives to the service of the poor. You can live here as long as you like. God has brought you here for a reason. You will forget all your sorrows here.

So obviously the sister was aware of certain facts of her life. Sunita nodded her head and listened to every word with meek submission. She was wondering why the sister had not spoken to her about the Biblical character Job’ s trials and tribulations and how one should emulate his unflinching faith in God.

She walked into the classroom and was aghast at seeing the faces of children -twenty of them. The sight pleased her –children with gentle, kind, smiling faces. She became their chechyamma. She sighed, she saw her darling Shloka in every eager face in the room. God was kind to her. In the afternoon, she took them all out into the garden. She only had to supervise them while they ran around in gay abandon. The garden was surrounded by mountains and deep wooded valleys with a small, bustling town below. By evening her duty had been done.

Was it a charity home? Was it a convent? She had no idea. It was an isolated place several miles from the nearest village. In the evening, she wandered around the place which was filled with flowers, fruit trees and bees. She was summoned for dinner. She ate what she could. After dinner, they gathered in the common room for prayers and she was back in her room. That was day one. She was glad to be back in her room. She felt so knackered that she fell into a deep sleep.

Sunita woke up with a start. It was a typical summer day. Through the window she could see the sun coming up from behind the line of trees on top of the ridge. She drew the curtains and a warm, yellow radiance was soaking into the room. It was so tranquil that morning chatter of birds pierced her ears. She stood still for a minute. Why was she here? What magic was this place going to have on her? Even if it did, was life going to be the same again? Time heals everything" so goes the saying. She desired no liberty. Her heart was not burning with a fiery ambition. What then did she want?

Over the days, she found the place to be divinely beautiful, the stillness was overpowering –no voice, no movement but just a splendid landscape with green meadows, pineforest, tea estate; it certainly had an ethereal touch. There was pasture land all around the place, a plot for growing vegetables. Right on top of the hill stood a lone, lemon tree. There was a bench in the garden. Everytime she felt trapped in a vacuum, she would sit on the magical bench. She found quiet solace but it was the condition of her soul that worried her unduly. Her head was always drooping and she had no wish to speak to anyone. It was certainly not the golden age of her life. A feeling to do well, fear of failure, a desire to please everyone, nothing bothered her now. She had no sense of adventure, she was certain that she could never recover her old self. Those dreams, which had kept her embers of her childhood and teenage days burning, were all smothered and turned to smithereens. Those wild desires, which had made her life so much worth living, were now suddenly snatched away. Why did this happen to her which had not happened to other women remained a mystery and by trying to solve that mystery she seemed to get more confused. She was perpetually ruminating her past life with her present.

Whatever it was, the place awoke reflection in her and she thought, with an air of resignation, of what was yet before her.

Life had not always been like this.

Once upon a time, not very long ago, Sunita’s life had been a happy song.

Sunita loved fine clothes, She loved to travel, she was a romantic, who dreamt of a tall, handsome guy wooing her with roses, wine and candlelit dinners. Her head was full of romantic escapades. More than anything, she dreamt of living a rich and glamorous life in the city of her dreams, Bombay. She was the only child of very loving and respectable parents. She was a pretty, rich and smart girl.

She was sick and tired of people commenting on how unambitious her chachen was, nobody had known the turmoil that had been brewing within his heart.

Her chachen had come to Madras after completing his Engineering and was employed with MRF, a leading tyre company in Madras. Her mother was a simple, docile lady, who may have had a myriad of dreams but she always put her husband’s and daughter’s interests before anything else in her life. Sunita spent the day trying to concentrate on her studies, but, without much success. Her parents lavished all their attention and love on their darling daughter. Her mother sent her for piano classes but she gave up learning how to play the piano saying that she had no inclination towards piano playing. They sent her for bharat natyam classes but she found it very strenuous. They tried to horn her skills in trying to help her improve her proficiency in language so they got her enrolled in Alliance Francaise for French lessons. After attending two weeks of classes she gave up because she felt that there was no need to learn a language that she would never use during her life time. She spent her time reading Filmfare, magazines on fashion and whipped up an interest in clothes, fashion and social ettiquette. Her parents were not particularly worried about her lack of interest in her studies, art or languages. They had plans to get her married to an educated boy from a good family and that was certainly not going to be a problem. It gave her immense pleasure to sit on the terrace and watch her rich neighbours, listen to Bollywood songs, frequent theatres, restaurants and shops. She was constantly on a self improvement programme taking care of her looks, her style of dressing, her diction, She wanted to change the direction of her life and gradually somewhere along the way, she had lost touch with reality. One thing was certain -She could never fulfil her dreams in her parents’ home for all the love and security that she enjoyed in her home, she could never adapt to their simple and naïve ways. She had made up her mind that she would live life in the fast lane. She would not let her life go by.

Tragedy struck her family after she had completed her graduation. Her father had died in a tragic accident and soon she and her mother shifted to Alwaye where they had their own house. Sunita got a job as a teacher in a school very close to her house. She knew very well that it was only a temporary job and she was certainly not going to live in this part of the world for long. She found her colleagues very boring and shiftless-their world centred around school life and home life. She remained distant and aloof.-they wore garish clothes, were very noisy and she shared nothing in common with them.

One evening, while she was having her cup of tea, her mother pulled a chair and moved close to her and with great trepidation told her -Molu, there is a proposal for you from a good family. Mohan is the only child for his parents. He is a qualified engineer brought up in Bangalore and after his father’s death they moved to Alwaye. He is working for a multinational company in Bombay. They don’t have any demands. Think about it and let me know what you feel about it. Chachen would have been very happy with this proposal.

Sunita smiled. There was nothing to think about the proposal. She gave her nod. He was employed in Bombay and, moreover, he was an only child for his parents, and that meant a life without liabilities. She had learnt very early in life that health was wealth but it was equally important to lead a life without financial liabilities. Sunita’s uncle had been the bugbear in the family. He was a college dropout, who later fell in love with another college dropout, who was equally worthless and both of them beget two worthless sons making it a fine family of four worthless people.

Her uncle had worked in the Gulf for a short while returned to Kerala, a few years later, started a business with his wife’s brother. A few months later, the business went bust and he had incurred a lot of debt. The onus of repaying the debt fell on her father’s shoulders. Uncle would lie low for a few months and then start another business with greater zeal, would manage to make a fast buck which his wife and sons would blow up on trivialities. A few months later the business would run into financial difficulties which would once again become her father’s problem. As a young child Sunita had always sensed that there was something amiss in the family, but these things did not really bother her. It is funny when you are young you know when there is a problem in the family, but it does not really bother you. As she grew older and the demands increased, Sunita felt agitated and one day, she remarked to her mum, This is so not fair on any of us. I can see your crestfallen faces each time we get a letter from them. You can’t let chachen throw away his hard earned money. They live and do things in an impulsive manner because they know that chachen will get them out off the mess. Just stop helping them and they will become more responsible.

Her amma heard her out and said ’ Mol, they are family. We all have our crosses to bear and probably this is ours. We are a very happy and lucky family."

Sunita was not convinced but the thought confirmed in her mind that she was so different in her temperament from her mother. Doing something wrong was not right and helping someone who was perpetually doing something wrong was also not acceptable. It was hard on her parents, especially on her mother, who remained a silent spectator to this ongoing show at home. May be Amma was right. Sunita was an only child and perhaps had put her interest foremost in all things but one thing she was certain, nobody had any right to rob one’s peace of mind and we needed to enjoy every gift that God had showered on us.

The wedding was a simple affair. Sunita’s relatives commented on how lucky Mohan was to get a bride like Sunita and Mohan’s relatives commented on how lucky Sunita was to get an eligible bachelor like Mohan. The bottom line was both of them were a very lucky couple with a wonderful future staring at them. Sunita felt over the moon because she was going to live in her dream city and considering the fact that Mohan was only twenty seven years old, she knew that Bombay was going to be her home for a long time. As the plane touched the airport she felt so elated that she whispered to herself ‘Bombay meri Jaan’. They lived in a small one bedroomed flat in Juhu and the vast expanse of water stretching in front of her was both intimidating and exciting. The bhai came in the morning to help her with her house work. Mohan left for work at seven am, the whole day stared at her like the blue sea. She enjoyed sitting in the small balcony and, the blue sea, in front of her, and the blue sky above her, had a calming effect on her. It was so invigorating that she felt every muscle and nerve in her body pulsating with excitement.

Life in Bombay suited her fine. Mohan was very surprised to see how quickly she had fitted into the role of a wife; she had no demands, she did not nag him, she got used to travelling by train, she visited Mahim church every Friday, at weekend Mohan and she went to the Juhu beach, Chowpatty or to the Regal cinema to watch a film. A few months, later she realised that she was pregnant. She was insistent that the child be born in Bombay. Her mother came to Bombay for her delivery and the little one, Shloka was a bundle of joy. Life seemed to be a bed of roses. The years that followed were perhaps the best time of her life. Shloka took up all her time and she dotted on her, her mother was well and happy in Alwaye, Mohan was an easy man to live with and she was lucky to find a job as a teacher in a reputed school, very close to her flat and this meant that she had to work a little harder to juggle housework, school work, looking after Shloka, who was put in a crèche in her school. She did not whine or complain and she took everything in her stride. Her cup of happiness was full to the brim.

The fourth year of her stay in Bombay was different; she received a rude jolt. Her darling friend had left her husband and had gone to the UK. She had received a letter from her. She was shocked beyond life. She had to reply to her letter. She could not put it off. Meena was going through a rough patch and needed her. She was dumbfounded and all this while she was under the impression that Meena was happy and well in Pathirapally. So this piece of news came as a rude jolt to her. Sunita was eager to know the reasons why Meena had gone to the UK. Her friend Meena, was a matured, gregarious girl and had a practical approach to life. What would have gone wrong? She would adapt to situations with ease unlike Sunita, who, always lived in a world of fantasy. She sat down to reply to Meena.

It had been seven years since she had come to Bombay. Her friend Meena was always in her thoughts. Life seemed to surprise her with rude jolts. Meena had lost her parents in that air accident. Suni’s mother had been diagnosed with cancer, the piece of news sent her reeling and Mohan was insistent that her mother should be treated in Bombay. Sunita was very happy to have her mother with her. The prognosis was for one year. Those were difficult days -trips to hospitals, taking care of Shloka, housework, school work. She spent all her freetime with her mother. It was heart rending to know that her mother could not be with her for long. Every Friday, she took her mother to the Mahim Church. It was disheartening to see her condition deteriorate day by day. She began to lose her hair and started developing tremors. She slept through the day and stayed awake at night. Her heart went out to her, her mother who had always defended and excused her for every small mistake that she had made as a young child and the loving remembrance of her tenderness came back rushing to her memory, she went up to her amma and put her hand around her neck, as she sat by her bed and the two of them remembered so many fond moments they had shared as a happy family. As the days went by amma knew that she was reaching her end and she wanted to be taken to Alwaye. Even during those days of pain and sorrow, Sunita would see a feeling of peace writ large on her face. She was happy to go because she felt everything here was in place. One day she held Sunita’s hand and said You are a lucky girl. God has given you everything. As a daughter and as a wife and mother you are blessed. Don’t throw it away for any silly reason. Cherish Mohan, he is a good man like your chachen. He will keep you happy like the way chachen and I kept you happy.

Sunita smiled but it took her several years to understand the full impact of those words

Just before leaving for Alwaye she held Mohan’s hand and kissed them You need to take care of my daughter. She has nobody but you. Within a few weeks she passed away. Sunita was shattered but she felt a great sense of relief. She did not have to see her mother suffer anymore. Mohan was very considerate towards her and she wondered what she would have done without him and tried to console her your mum is with your dad in Heaven and I am with you on Earth. No words could wipe out that image of a shrivelled figure and anguish look of her mother from her mind.-helpless and hapless, waiting to embrace death. Such a dignified lady but what an undignified way to go. Cancer affects not only the patient but the entire family. Mohan and Shloka brought her great consolation but deep down the void created by her death was never going to get filled. She was not yet thirty and her loving chachen and amma had left her and gone to heaven and she was certain that they were in heaven, but it was the plight of her friend that seemed to worry her. She was all alone in the UK and had lost her parents as well. How was her Meena coping with all those losses in her life.?

‘It is funny’ she told Mohan Now that they are gone, I see them everyday. Their presence was so soothing to me.

No soul on earth, not even Shloka could