Miracle Letters of Love: An Intimate Glimpse of God Turning Two Hearts into One

By Linda Anderson

Two young people meet by Gods chance in an airport. One is a Christianthe other an atheist. Over the next year, they write hundreds of letters, become friends, become lovers, and marry. This is an intimate story of coming to faith in Christ, falling deeply in love, and candidly working through loves exhilarating and challenging twists and turns.

• Language: English
• Publisher: WestBow Press
• Release date: Jan 13, 2016
• ISBN: 9781512726749

Linda Anderson

Allen and Linda Anderson are speakers and authors of a series of twelve books about the spiritual relationships between people and animals. Their mission is to help people discover and benefit from the miraculous powers of animals. In 1996 they co-founded the Angel Animals Network to increase love and respect for all life through the power of story. In 2004 Allen and Linda Anderson were recipients of a Certificate of Commendation from Governor Tim Pawlenty in recognition of their contributions as authors in the state of Minnesota. In 2007 their book Rescued: Saving Animals from Disaster won the American Society of Journalists and Authors Outstanding Book award. Allen and Linda's work has been featured on NPR, the Washington Post, USA Today, NBC's Today show, The Montel Williams Show, ABC Nightly News, Cat Fancy, Dog Fancy, national wire services, London Sunday Times, BBC Radio, Beliefnet, ivillage, Guideposts, and other national, regional, and international media and news outlets. The Andersons both teach writing at The Loft Literary Center in Minneapolis. They share their home with a dog, two cats, and a cockatiel. They donate a portion of revenue from their projects to animal shelters and animal-welfare organizations and speak at fundraisers. You are welcome to visit Allen and Linda's website at www.angelanimals.net and send them stories and letters about your experiences with animals. At the website you may enter new contests for upcoming books and request a subscription to the free email newsletter, Angel Animals Story of the Week, featuring an inspiring story each week.

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Copyright © 2016 Linda Anderson.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission. NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION® and NIV® are registered trademarks of Biblica, Inc. Use of either trademark for the offering of goods or services requires the prior written consent of Biblica US, Inc.

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

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ISBN: 978-1-5127-2675-6 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-2676-3 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-5127-2674-9 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2016900226

WestBow Press rev. date: 1/13/2016

Contents

Dedication

Preface

Chapter 1   August 31, 1973 to September 1, 1973

Chapter 2   September 2 to October 26, 1973

Chapter 3   October 26 to December 21

Chapter 4   December 23, 1973 to January 2, 1974

Chapter 5   January 2 to January 31, 1974

Chapter 6   February 4 to February 10, 1974

Chapter 7   February 14 to February 17, 1974

Chapter 8   February 18 to March 12, 1974

Chapter 9   March 14 to March 19, 1974

Chapter 10   March 20 to April 6, 1974

Chapter 11   April 6 – May 15, 1974

Chapter 12   May 15 to May 20, 1974

Chapter 13   May 20 to May 29, 1974

Chapter 14   June 1 to June 9, 1974

Chapter 15   June 9 to July 2, 1974

Chapter 16   July 3 to July 7, 1974

Chapter 17   July 7 to September 1, 1974

Chapter 18   September 1 to September 14, 1974

Epilogue

Dedication

This book is dedicated to the glory of God. Without Him, there would be no story. God is the author and finisher of our faith through Jesus, and it is God who miraculously brought my husband and I together, making our two lives become one.

I also dedicate this book to my wonderful husband, Paul, who has shown me a love as close to the love of God as humanly possible.`

Preface

Miracle Letters of Love is a love story. A real life love story. Two people met in an airport 42 years ago and fell madly in love. Forty-two years later, they are still madly in love. This book is a very intimate look at their first year together as told through the actual love letters they wrote to each other. But first, a little back story about how and why this book came to be.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I love to read. I have always loved to read. As a child I would walk around my home with a book in my hand. Even now I read every chance I get. Mainly I like historical fiction or biographies of people from other cultures, regions or personal life experiences, or Christian fiction or non-fiction books. But I also read political books, mystery or suspense books, the classics, and a little bit of everything. I read on my Kindle, I read paperback books I purchase for a dollar at an annual book sale, where I stock up on a boxful of interesting books to last me a year, or I get books recommended by friends and buy them used at Amazon Books.

I bought the book Dancing with Fireflies by Denise Hunter at a friend’s recommendation. I had just finished a thought-provoking book about the immigration challenges facing America, so I felt like reading something light and easy to give my mind a rest. I enjoyed Denise Hunter’s Christian romance book so much that I ordered the rest of the Chapel Springs Romance Series when I finished. I flew through the series quickly and it got me thinking about my own romance story of forty-two years ago, when I met my future husband.

In 1973 there were no cellphones, computers, emails, text messages or other fast, inexpensive means of communication. The only means of communicating to someone long-distance were expensive phone calls, telegraphs, or writing letters, using eight cent stamps! My husband-to-be and I did most of our courting by writing letters - about two hundred or more letters before getting married and another hundred or so after getting married, during long separations because of my husband’s job! Throughout our forty plus years of marriage we carried those letters in a box during the eight times we moved to a new home and carried them cross-country from the west coast to the east coast, but we never looked them over or reread any of the letters. Maybe that was because I was afraid I would sound like the youthfully ignorant and naïve person that I was at the time. Maybe I was afraid that I would be embarrassed if I reread the letters because at twenty-three, I was less mature. Or maybe I was always just too busy. In any case, I ignored those precious letters that had been hidden away in a closet, collecting dust for too long; letters that told such an amazingly romantic, but true love story and a story of conversion!

But for some inexplicable reason, after reading the series of Christian romance books, I was suddenly drawn back to those letters. I was curious to see what my husband and I said to each other in our youth. I wanted to relive those magical days of our past lives. Once I started reading the first letters, I could hardly put them down as I relived our story of a blossoming love. Ours is a unique story; it is in many ways miraculous! The way God brought us together was definitely a relationship orchestrated and designed by God. The way God brought Paul into a relationship with Him, through Christ, was also appointed by Him. We expressed in those letters our fears as well as our trust and commitment foremost to God. My husband wrote beautiful words, often sounding like poetry, in his expressions and conversation about love and devotion to me and to God. We were both young, in our early twenties; so there were definitely some naïve, unsophisticated and innocent thoughts written, that can be a bit embarrassing to admit out loud, but the words and passions were real. The letters testify not only to a love that started from a seed and grew, but also to a faith that began with a seed and grew to maturity on the same time table as our love.

The 1960’s and 1970’s were a turbulent time. Young men were being involuntarily drafted into fighting a war they didn’t want to be in: North Vietnam was trying to force it’s communism onto South Vietnam, and America tried to help stop it. War protesters voiced their objections to the war on all the college campuses across America. Then the sexual revolution began with phrases like free love and free sex. And drugs like LSD or heroin suddenly became rampant. The hippies and flower children were expressing a form of rebellion against life as it had been known. People were either searching for meaning and purpose – or trying to escape from facing reality. Because of these unsettling times, a Jesus Movement began … many young people, who were often referred to as Jesus Freaks turned to Jesus as the answer to their problems and insecurities. Though neither of us were a part of the revolutionary mindset, it was in this setting that I began my journey with Christ while I was in college, and out of which this story emerged.

At this same time the Women’s Lib movement began. Women were becoming more assertive and expressed themselves more boldly about their demands for being treated equally. Many women left their roles as housewives and entered the work force, aspiring to become fulfilled in careers or as co-wage earners. Zero Population was also encouraged, along with birth-control methods, resulting in family sizes shrinking to two or less children. Abortion became legal in all fifty states in 1973 and was becoming more accepted and available. As the Christian movement emerged, it attempted to counter some of the feminist ideas with strong biblical teachings about a women’s role, which influenced our thinking (and which have been slightly modified over the years.)

And thus, began the work of chronicling our story to share with others. It’s a true story of romance and a story of redemption. In our mid-sixties now, our love and devotion to God and to one another has fulfilled all the hopes and dreams expressed in our early twenties. My husband and I are still best friends, life-long companions, lovers, and soul-mates. We owe it all to God, who loves us with a perfect love, and has instructed us and helped us through every hurdle and showered His blessings on us. I recently read a quote from Skye Turner that said, The most romantic love story isn’t Romeo and Juliet who died together, but Grandpa and Grandma who grew old together. My husband, Paul, wrote in a letter written from Guam on April 17, 1974, My greatest dream is not what we achieve, but that all we do is done in an attitude of togetherness. Do you think that kind of life together is possible? And my answer 42 years later is YES!" We are still together and still as in love as we were 42 years ago! My hope is that this book will inspire, motivate, and deepen your love and commitment to the Lord and perhaps someone you love.

Chapter 1

August 31, 1973 to September 1, 1973

Seattle, Washington, to San Diego, California

A Chance Meeting

Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

I’m 23 years old, living in Sacramento, California but visiting my parents in Seattle Washington. My mother and I were walking through the Seattle-Tacoma Airport on August 31, 1973, looking confused about where to get on and off the fast moving underground subway trains leading to my departure gate. I had been visiting my parents at their home near Seattle for a few weeks, anticipating my move back to Sacramento for the second year of a job, and getting ready to move into a new apartment. But my immediate destination was my brother’s house in San Diego, not Sacramento. That’s where I had left my car during my stay up north. I had plans to visit my brother and his wife for a few days before driving to my final destination in Sacramento.

In those days, you could take family or friends right up to the airport terminal at the gate where the plane would depart or arrive. There was no TSA, no threats of terrorists, and no barriers separating passengers from friends or family sending them off or greeting them.

As I mentioned, we weren’t quite sure what train to take to get to our departure gate, and I guess we looked somewhat bewildered and lost. A tall businessman approached us and asked if we were lost. When we told him that I was going to San Diego, he said he was headed to that same gate and would be glad to help us get there. I didn’t know it then, but that tall man would be my future husband and life-long love.

That was miracle one. God’s timing is so precise. Had either one of us been at our meeting spot seconds earlier or later, we would not have met.

Together we set off for the departure gate to San Diego. As we approached the gate we were among a group of people who learned some unexpected and disappointing news. We were all being bumped off the plane in order to send 20 undocumented immigrants back home to Mexico via San Diego! We would have to wait for another plane to be arranged to take us there. My mother had to pick up my dad from work, so the tall man prophetically told her, Don’t worry, I’ll take care of your daughter. What should have been a few hours’ flight, ended up being an eight-hour journey from Seattle to San Diego! That was miracle two. You see, God knew that the tall man needed time to learn about Him from me. If the plane ride had been just a couple of hours, Paul’s hardened heart would likely have remained closed to God. So the eight hours became the start of a new faith in Christ and a budding romance that’s lasted all these years!

After several hours waiting for a replacement plane, and exchanging pleasantries and chit-chat, we finally boarded the plane. Miracle three was that I was assigned a seat next to that same tall, handsome gentleman we met boarding the subway train! As we settled into our seats waiting for take-off, Paul’s first question to me was, What kind of work do you do? I was working for a Christian ministry at the time, called Campus Crusade for Christ. Three years earlier, I had become a Christian while in college at Arizona State University; working on a teaching degree. I became very active with the organization as a student; soaking up everything I could learn about Jesus and discovering how being a Christian could make a difference in the way I lived. The wonderful discipleship I received made me decide to dedicate the next few years of my life after graduation to working for Campus Crusade for Christ, where I could help others grow in their relationship with Christ also.

That question - What kind of work do you do? led to about a hundred or more other questions about my faith, God, why I believed, what the Bible said about various topics, and especially what it said about salvation, Jesus Christ, how to become a Christian, and how Christ changed my life. Paul, the tall man, had come from an atheist (or perhaps agnostic, if he were honest with himself) point of view. He had previously tried various religions that disappointed him, and he had been turned off to the few church people he’d encountered and the brief and sporadic church upbringing he’d had as a child. Paul had never heard that Christianity encompassed a personal relationship with the living God - through Jesus Christ. He had never come across a true believer who loved the Lord as her Savior and as her Lord - a person who believed the Bible was God’s Word, and relevant in every aspect of life. Miracle four – Paul met someone who lived to serve God and tell others about Him. Paul was and is an inquisitive and curious person who sought to become knowledgeable about everything in life. Religion was no exception - he was intrigued by our discussions and wanted to know all he could about my faith.

At the time, I was a very shy, quiet person, who found it hard to talk to people - especially guys! But my experience with Campus Crusade for Christ the previous year helped me step out of my comfort zone a lot! I had to reach out to strangers, speak at seminars, speak to people while raising monetary support, and lead Bible studies (often stepping out in faith to do so.) But my nature was still quiet and shy. God brought someone along that I felt very comfortable talking to. Paul was good at drawing me out, and asking questions about the thing that mattered most to me – my faith in Christ. I had no problem conversing and interacting with Paul during our time together.

We talked continually on the flight, all the way from Seattle to Los Angeles, where another plane was supposed to be waiting for us. But, as God would ordain, there was no plane waiting for us in Los Angeles – miracle five! So after another long wait and more conversation, we finally got on the plane from Los Angeles to San Diego (where Paul lived) and continued to talk about spiritual things. I shared the gospel of Christ with Paul, and at some point asked if he wanted to receive Christ as his Lord and Savior, but he wasn’t ready to make a decision at that time. He had a lot more questions and wanted to learn more, so I supplied him with lots of reading material. I gave Paul a friend’s address in Sacramento in case he wanted to write and ask more questions. I also gave him the telephone number of a friend (remember – no cell phones!) that he could reach me at until I moved into my new place in Sacramento and got a phone set up. Paul was heading to Thailand in a few days for his work, but he would be visiting a sister who lived near Sacramento before leaving for Thailand. He said that he would try to call me while at his sister’s.

I thought that Paul and I could not be less alike! I had been living around college students for the previous four years of college and for one year of being on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ. The students and I dressed, acted, and spoke casually and informally, as most young people do. When Paul and I met, I was wearing a long dress and had a patch over one eye after a sixth eye operation I’d recently had. Paul, on the other hand, was dressed in a suit, traveling with several middle-aged men in business suits, and spoke with a vocabulary and the mannerisms of someone very well-educated and mature. I assumed he was much older than me, so I wasn’t thinking about romance.

Although I had at one time struggled with being single, I had actually come to grips with my singleness the previous year. I dated many guys in college and had a few short-term boyfriends, but never mister right. I wasn’t interested in anyone I knew in Sacramento. In the seventies the average person was married between twenty and twenty-two years of age, not thirty or thirty-two, like it seems to be today! Most of my high school and college friends were already married. I really desired marriage and a family one day. But after a considerable struggle over still being single at such an old age of twenty-three I finally came to a point of giving my future up to God, saying, Not my will, but Yours, God. I decided I would start living my life as if He wanted me to be single the rest of my life. I would make decisions about how to spend my money and time, and about how to plan my career as if I would always be single. I felt a release giving that desire for marriage over to God and truly accepting whatever He had for me as a single person. I was at peace with being single. So thinking about Paul as a dating prospect was not on my mind at all. However, I do remember thinking, If I ever did marry, it would be to someone like him!

After finally arriving in San Diego eight hours later, we parted ways. But neither of us could get the other person off of our minds! I lay awake that night, praying continually for Paul throughout the night - like I’ve never prayed for anyone before or since. I was burdened for the soul of this man I had just spent eight hours with, talking about Jesus. I asked the Lord to draw him to Himself, to bring him to the Truth, and to speak to his heart and soul. I didn’t think romantically. And I didn’t have goose bumps all over – I just felt a tremendous burden and concern for Paul’s spiritual state. At the same time, Paul was wrestling with the things we’d talked about. He couldn’t stop thinking about God and the different words of life I had given him.

A few days later, I arrived at my new apartment in Sacramento, continuing to pray for Paul, and ready for my second year on the Sacramento State College campuses, working with Campus Crusade for Christ. Paul went back to his job, working as a government auditor in San Diego, and preparing for his upcoming three month assignment to Thailand. He had recently helped his parents buy and move into a house near San Diego; giving his dad a chance to recover from health complications, and Paul a place to live in between lengthy travel assignments.

One complication almost put an end to our continued communication: Paul lost the number of the friend I told him he could contact while I was between residences! But after much perseverance, he managed to find my newly listed phone number just before leaving for Thailand from Sacramento – miracle six. We spoke briefly on the phone, leaving addresses and promises to write to each other.

That’s how we met. Improbable miracles, two people living hundreds of miles apart, and a mustard seed kernel sown in the heart of a man far from God. I was settling into a hectic schedule in Sacramento and Paul was about to spend the next three months 12,000 miles away. We were going in separate ways. Or so we thought. But God had other plans.

Throughout the next chapters, you will read our letters that were written back and forth during the year after we met. Our letters show how our relationship with each other developed and progressed. The letters also show how Paul entered into a full and lasting relationship with God through His Son. During this year, we spent plenty of money on postage and long-distance phone calls. There was often a delay in getting the mail – sometimes it took five or six days to arrive. Sometimes we didn’t get a letter for several days, and then got five on one day! We eagerly awaited the mail every day. As you will see, Paul’s letters are lengthier than mine, since he, being the better writer, elaborated on his feelings in a much more captivating way. His words reminded me of reading poetry or listening to a beautiful song, or gazing at lovely scenery, and as time moved on, his letters became truly romantic.

Though I didn’t want to leave much out, I also didn’t want to include every detail discussed in every letter. I omitted much of our talk about our activities, our interests, family, work, our hopes, our dreams and plans. As we grew in our relationship through correspondence, we discovered we had similar aspirations and ideas and interests, which were not all included here. We got to know each other’s fears, insecurities, and weaknesses, which at times threatened our relationship. Our youthful insecurities and immaturity are awkward to look back on, but they are real glimpses into who we were and the kinds of struggles many young people experience. I considered leaving out many of those vacillating fears and doubts which moved up and down like a roller coaster ride at times, but I decided to be intimately honest. But the great thing is that God helped us work through each of those trials and insecurities as we submitted to His leadership in our lives. More miracles to be sure.

Please sit back and relive our journey through the love letters Paul and I wrote to each other. This is a journey of two people who developed an abiding relationship with God and developed a life-long living love letter together, even to this day.

Here begins the story of our budding relationship, and the first of our many letters written:

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Sample of Linda and Paul’s Letters

Chapter 2

September 2 to October 26, 1973

San Diego & Sacramento, California and Bangkok, Thailand

A New Found Faith!

For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

The first letter Paul wrote on September 19, 1973 from San Diego, California, as he prepared for his trip to Thailand:

It’s evening now and I’ve been thinking of you – so here it is: one of a hopeful succession of letters. With luck it may not be too boring, and may bring some kind, not-too-philosophical thoughts.

I felt very good, almost euphoric, after talking with you Sunday. I had so wished to see you, but fate had other plans, I guess. Your trust in God, in life, eternal life is a thing I’ve never before felt in anyone. I don’t want to pass up the opportunity of knowing you, of learning about you, and possibly learning a little more about me in the exchange. I feel a peacefulness like maybe I hold a reservoir of values similar to yours waiting to be let loose if only I can find the catalyst; someone to open the flood gates: maybe you. Anyway, I’m disappointed by not having seen you – I like you.

Linda’s first letter written to Paul from Sacramento on September 26, 1973:

I was so pleased to see your letter in the mailbox the other day – and even happier to read what you had to say. It surprises me that after only knowing and talking to you such a short time, you should be on my mind as much as you have been. Not only do I think about you, but I pray for you daily, that you might come to know and love the Lord with all your heart, soul, and mind and strength. If you could only know how much God loves you and wants to begin a relationship with you, I can’t see how you could reject it.

In 1 Corinthians 2:10-16 and 3:1-3, Paul talks about three kinds of men – the non-Christian, the Spirit-filled Christian, and the carnal Christian. If you read it, it might explain a little about my thinking as I write to you. There is so much I want to say about spiritual things to you, but you won’t be able to understand without the Spirit of God in you. I wish I could share more of my life with you, but I can’t. I agree with you, that I feel an affinity with you, too – and yet there is still a barrier, because the One that’s dearer to me than anything or anyone else is not so with you. If only you could see how Christ, living in two different people, unites them together in one mind, you might know what I mean. The Lord has enabled me to have such deep relationships with other Christians, who I may have only known a short time. Perhaps this increases my desire for you to give yourself to the Lord, so that I could share more of the things of the Spirit than just the things of the world.

Paul wrote his second letter on October 1, 1973, testifying of his new faith in Christ:

Your letter was a sheer delight, and even more! I feel very much at peace when I think of you, and your letter imbued that same quality. Thoughts of you, of your ideas, of your faith in Christ and your direction and goals are also with me constantly. I read 1 Corinthians 2:6-13 and 3:1-3, and understand, at least with my mind, what you mean. Linda, I want so much to experience and live as the spiritual man because I want the peace of God. More and more I think of the conflicts of life and the purely hedonistic direction of so much of the populace. This disturbs me greatly and I feel a major alienation to the world around me. But concomitant with this feeling, I am tempted by the evil; to become a part of it all. So now I really need something holy, a direction to my life. I suppose I am now as you were a few years ago; listless and largely apathetic…very restless. The only true pleasure I have is my work – as you know – and I think that is a main impetus because of its esoteric qualities: because of the independence of my work I am able to become completely involved and I know it can be free of the surrounding bias of most of the rest of the world. Now, supposing you were able to follow my ramblings to this point, I think you can appreciate why I found you so refreshing and glowlingly attractive. Your purity and fusion with God have really overwhelmed me.

Now a hard question: Do I want a unity with the Lord so I can grow to know you better? Or do I want to know you in order to grow in unity with Christ? I raise this, Linda, because I want to know you, and I really think I want to know Christ, but the interrelationship confuses me and I need to tell you. Whatever the answer, I am asking Christ to come into my life and I have begun to pray for that. I would like your help – will you guide me in the ways that Christ wants us to live? I know you have already started, I am reading John, but it confuses me much as electricity confuses those who do not have a basic understanding of the principles of physics. Linda, I believe that, as you learn to know me, you will see that I do want to experience the unity of Christ that brings two different people together in one soul. I feel I’ve always wanted this, but until now that feeling has been vague, just a longing with little direction. And now, it seems that you have struck a match on a very dark night – and I hope that match will flare into a raging bon-fire that Christ may fill me with the serenity he has given you.

I suppose by the time you get this I will be in Bangkok. It’s estimated that about one per cent of the Thais are Christians. But I intend to take my Bible and read regularly. I think I told you I have never really read the Bible. What should I do besides believe??

Linda’s joyful response to Paul’s second letter, written on October 9, 1973:

Thanks for your last letter. I enjoyed it so much, because I could see a difference from your first letter in the way you referred to the Lord and then your desire for Him to be real in your heart in the second letter. You don’t know how happy that made me when you said you were asking Christ to come into your life! The Bible says that the angels rejoice over everyone who comes to Him – and I rejoice too! God knows your heart and the desires of it – if you sincerely asked Christ to come into your life, and believed that He would do it, just as He promised, then you can be sure that Christ is there – and start thanking Him that He is. Once you’ve placed your faith in the facts of the Bible, He will make it so evident in your life that He is there. 2 Corinthians 5:17 tells us that we become new creatures when we become Christians – everything about our old life will pass away, and everything becomes different and new.

I hope you’ll forgive me if I sound like I’m preaching at you all the time. I guess there’s just so much about the Christian life that I want for you to experience, too.

I appreciated your honesty about the conflict of wanting to know me vs. wanting to know Christ. I would hope that the latter would be the strongest desire of yours and that it would increase more and more. I feel so undeserving and unworthy of your desire to know me – yet I am glad and I hope it grows, too. As for my own thoughts on this matter – I also have two different thoughts running through my head. I want more than anything for you to know Christ personally and to begin growing in the knowledge of the Lord. I would be willing to sacrifice our friendship for that to happen. But I also want very much to know you more. Actually, the two are interrelated because you cannot know all of me unless you know the Lord, and I cannot know all of you unless you know the Lord.

It is hard for me to guide you in the way that Christ wants us to live just through letters. But the Lord has already provided someone for that very purpose. The Holy Spirit dwells within every believer to teach them and show them the ways of Christ, and to give them power to live it. The Holy Spirit will also make the Bible become more understandable for you. I will pray that God will give you wisdom and help you understand.

You asked, What should I do besides believe? Again, I want to stress the meaning behind the word, believe – for it actually means to commit yourself to, to rely on, and trust completely. It involves not only the intellect and emotions, but the will (just as it does when a couple is married and finally says, I do.) Once you believe and ask Christ into your life, you believe He’s there, and act upon it. That is why the Bible is so important. It teaches us how to act upon it – it’s our guidebook for living, and our Heavenly Father’s way of communicating to His children.

I’ll be at a Campus Crusade for Christ conference from December 26th through January 1st. I’d really like for you to come if you can. It would be a chance for you to meet a lot of other Christians (both new Christians and old) and also to hear many good speakers talk about how to live the Christian life.

Paul’s letter written on October 12, 1973:

As of today I haven’t received any reply to my last letter; I hope it’s the slowness of overseas mail! You occupy a good deal of my thoughts – which become more secure and directed each day, I think, because of your influence. I can feel that my relationship with Christ is growing, and I’ve rediscovered (maybe newly discovered) contentment and serenity of prayer. My prayers include you always, as I thank Christ for your influence. I must tell you that I pray for the hopeful continuity and sympathy of our paths, but I also pray that God continue to guide me and control my will within His, no matter what the future holds. Linda, I really do feel a new and proper direction, and that alone makes you dear to me for I really believe it was God’s destiny to have you kick me in the pants along a more meaningful and pure existence. Yes, there is still some confusion (mainly about my worth in God’s eyes,) but I feel more strong and confident each day. I really wish I could talk with you and tell you of my thoughts and receive your guidance. What is right? What is wrong? Can I avoid those moments of weakness and how can I cope with the many things I have learned that I know are wrong, but have become deep habit? Can I completely change overnight? God willing, I can get your help in this and other matters.

I would like, too, to speak with you about the Bible. So many things I don’t understand or can’t comprehend. I finished the Gospel of John and I know I have a better understanding of faith and its importance, that whoever believes in me shall not perish but have everlasting life. Linda, I hope I will be able to explain my feeling to this concept: I believe I truly want to have faith in Christ, the peace and purity that I have seen in you is enough to convince me of that and my own renewed peace from prayer reinforces that even further. And I do love Christ for what He has already given me – a life of great and precious worth. But I almost feel guilty to ask for everlasting life with God. I think selfish is a more appropriate word. Who am I, so imperfect compared with Christ, to ask for eternal life? I do want it, yes, but do I deserve it? Well, enough of that (I hope I haven’t bothered you with my simple adolescence), I do want you to know that what you said seems to be true – give Christ a chance to come into my life and He will. I can feel that happening.

Thailand is as beautiful as I was led to believe and I do wish you were here to share this with me.

On October 16, 1973 I wrote Paul a letter. In summary: I told Paul that I had visited his sister in Woodland, California and met his twin nieces, whom I learned were very fond of their Uncle Paul! To my great surprise, his sister told me that Paul was only twenty-four years old – a year older than me! I guess that was somewhat of a comfort and happy news for me to hear. Was I beginning to feel something more than friendship?? I was glad there was distance between us, so that I could observe his growth in the Lord from a distance; independent of me. That distance also meant any feelings I might develop would be reliant on knowing him as the unique person he is, rather than depending on my emotions to determine them.

Linda wrote again on October 23, 1973:

It seems really odd that I should be so open to you and care for you, after only talking such a short time with you. In a way, it embarrasses me to think how free I’ve been in my writing, and yet I’m not, because I know our relationship began around the spiritual and is now centered on the Lord even still. And I believe that He is the one who is leading me to share the things I do in my letters, to feel the way I feel, think the way I do about you, and to pray the way I do for you. I even sense that I am communicating to you not only by letters, but by the Spirit. As He shows me what to pray for you – I sense an identity with where you’re at and what you’re doing, constantly.

I am glad that you express the same kinds of thoughts to me – otherwise I would feel foolish, being as open as I am. But yet, it’s not like I’m chasing you or anything – because as I said before, I’m content as I am and satisfied with my relationship with the Lord so much, that I have no need to chase someone.

I am so excited to hear about your growth in Christ – already I’ve seen so many answers to my prayers for you, as He’s making you into the man of God He’d like you to be. At our retreat last weekend, our speaker was mentioning something about what to look for in a mate – he said that he or she has a heartbeat for Jesus without me – to serve Him. And that’s so much what I want for you…to have a heartbeat for Jesus on your own. I believe that’s why God has put us so far away from each other – so we might grow individually – and that your growth would come only from the Lord, other people, and the Word – not just from me (otherwise you would depend on me for spiritual growth and I would be leading our relationship – not the Lord.) I do want to help though, and I appreciate your questions you share with me – that shows your pride is not interfering.

I’ve seen many areas in my own life that the Lord has had to work on in me. The biggest area I saw the most change in last year was opening up to other people and not being afraid to show others my weaknesses. This isn’t much of a problem around girls, but it definitely is around guys. Sometimes I feel awkward or get nervous being open with guys. My roommate is good for me in this area, because she feels more comfortable around guys than girls – so I’m learning as I observe her.

I am glad you don’t feel worthy in God’s eyes, and that you don’t think you deserve eternal life because you feel so imperfect compared to Christ. That is exactly where God wants you to be in your attitude about yourself. If we did deserve eternal life, and we did feel as capable and perfect as Christ was – we wouldn’t need Him. His death on the cross wouldn’t have been necessary. But God wants us to let go of our pride and ego so that we see a need for Him and we see that our life can never satisfy or bring complete happiness when we are controlling it. Only when we admit we need Him and ask Him humbly, can He give us the love He so much wants to give. Another thing about eternal life – you will never deserve it as long as you live. God doesn’t grade on a curve; we would all flunk! But He’s given us an A+ if we do it His way. That’s where other religious cults go wrong – they feel you have to work your way to heaven. Ephesians 2:8, 9 says, For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith - and this not from yourselves, it’s the gift of God - not by works, so that no one can boast.

I disagree with your comments about the Buddhist religion