Cracked: a Biblical Perspective on Divorce: Exposing Tradition Revealing the Truth
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About this ebook
In my world of Conservative Christian policies a divorce was unthinkable. Men and women whose training and background actively prohibited divorce and were very quick to chastise and condemn divorcees.
Therefore, this work simply began as a group of self-help notes designed to help me survive the many unpleasant conversations I had with my religious friends. I fully recognize some of the concepts provided in this book may contradict certain Conservative Christian viewpoints. However, they are all 100% scriptural. This book was written to bring comfort to those who have experienced a divorce and want to remarry. To accomplish this goal I had to crack the language code. Too, many of our modern bibles have adjusted the language to promote the Conservative Christian story.
I did not write this book to promote divorce. Within the pages of this writing are helpful nuggets designed to assist with conversations between husbands and wives. Ive also included strategies to help maintain a healthy marital relationship.
Finally, this book was designed to assist individuals with overcoming the victimization, stigmatization, isolation, embarrassment, shame, and the other sorrows based in ignorance that accompany a divorce in certain religious communities.
Bishop Henry R. Griffin
Bishop Henry R. Griffin is an anointed man of God serving in Christian Ministry for more than 40 years. He is an honorably discharged Navy Veteran, graduating from Kennedy King with his Associates in Applied Science and Light of the World with his Bachelors in Biblical Studies. This servant of God has worked 6 years as an Associate Minister, 3 years as an Assistant Pastor, and 20 years as the Senior Pastor with 4 of those years serving as Bishop. In addition this servant of God was twice elected to public office representing the citizens of his City. Unfortunately, after 36 years of marriage he found himself in divorce court.
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Cracked - Bishop Henry R. Griffin
Copyright © 2016 Bishop Henry R. Griffin.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.
WestBow Press
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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.
Scripture taken from the King James Version of the Bible.
ISBN: 978-1-5127-5954-9 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-5127-5955-6 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-5127-5953-2 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2016916360
WestBow Press rev. date: 10/27/2016
Contents
Foreword
The Purpose
The Silent Trap
It Can Happen To Anyone
Bad Doctrine
Face Value
Understanding the Words
Deuteronomy 24:1–5
The Debate
To Put Away
1st Corinthians 7
It Is Not a Sin
Remove the Stigma
Husband of One Wife
Reasons
Hope
Strategies
Integrity
Quick Summary
Closing Prayer
Foreword
Before opening our dialogue on divorce, I would like to say how sorry I am for the painful, abusive, sometimes hypocritical relationships that so many have endured in the name of religion. I also apologize for having supported some unbiblical ideas that I now recognize have absolutely nothing to do with the God’s view of marriage but have more to do with maintaining the status quo of organized religion, particularly the influence of selfish leaders in the lives of adherents.
There is an evil religious spirit
often operating within various denominations of organized religion. This spirit influences, inspires, and motivates its leaders to burden people with the dictates and viewpoints of their particular denomination.
And he said, Woe unto you also, ye lawyers! for ye lade men with burdens grievous to be borne, and ye yourselves touch not the burdens with one of your fingers. (Luke 11:46 KJV)
The religious spirit often operating in organized religion has a set purpose and plan. It emphasizes and asserts your duty, requires full devotion to its rituals, and demands obedience to a prescribed code of ethics all in order to influence its adherents, maintain social stability, and achieve a sort of religious relevance.
The spirit operating in organized religion has been very successful in Judeo-Christianity for centuries. Unfortunately, some of its original rituals and practices have morphed over the years away from the accuracy of the scriptures. Religious leaders have used their natural ideas as well as scriptures without considering the original cultural context or linguistic accuracy, thereby presenting an inaccurate picture of God’s original design. By twisting or ignoring the original cultural context, we minimize God’s intent and maximize the self-centered purpose of the leaders within the religion.
For example, in our present-day Bibles, Jesus is portrayed as a Caucasian with light-colored eyes and long, flowing hair. Due to the proliferation of this image, Christians and non-Christians alike assume Jesus had long hair. According to historical reality, Jesus was born into a Middle Eastern Jewish family. He would not appear as a Caucasian. Neither would he have long, flowing hair. Eusebius copied the text of the first-century Jewish historian Josephus in Against Apion I.22, para.173–4. Jews were known in the first century for their close-cropped hair
Many modern-day Bibles and works of art continue to ignore the cultural context of Jewish men living in the first century under Roman rule. During the time of Jesus, the emperor set the pattern in style and mode of dress for the entire empire. We have clearly preserved artifacts of Julius Caesar and can easily validate he did not have long, flowing hair.
I’ve heard some Bible teachers attempting to justify long hair on Jesus by claiming he was a Nazarite. That is linguistic error, an inaccurate conclusion not held by many. Jesus lived in Nazareth; he was not under the vow of a Nazarite. The vow of the Nazarite is a voluntary time of consecration or separation unto the Lord. Nazareth is a city in Northern Israel.
People who took the vow of the Nazarite could not drink wine or grape juice. They could not eat fresh grapes or raisins. Neither could anyone under this vow come near a dead body or cut their hair. The scriptures validate that Jesus drank wine, as well as coming near dead bodies as he raised them from the dead.
According to the Scriptures, the Nazarite vow concluded and the adherent was expected to shave his head and burn the hair as a peace offering at the temple. Jesus did not have long hair and was not under the vow of the Nazarite. He simply lived a portion of his life in the city of Nazareth.
And the Nazarite shall shave the head of his separation at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation, and shall take the hair of the head of his separation, and put it in the fire which is under the sacrifice of the peace offerings. (Num. 6:18)
Finally, the scripture written by the apostle Paul reveals it was considered a shame for a man to have long hair (1 Cor. 11:14 KJV).
Christendom is filled with real-world examples of leaders observing rituals and practices that have morphed away from the original practices and true perspectives of the scriptures. Furthermore, these practices have been normalized through repetition and saturation of these morphed perspectives. Can you honestly imagine the first-century monotheistic Jewish disciples having a serious discussion concerning the doctrine of the trinity? The doctrine of the trinity was a revelation introduced several hundred years after Christ.
How about lunar celebrations? Can you envision the first-century apostles of Jesus celebrating the first Sunday following the first new moon after the spring equinox? Today’s church has taken this original lunar celebration and attached it to the resurrection of Christ. Furthermore, we celebrate it with early sunrise services and eating Easter ham. Both practices were originally paganist. Biblical culture has absolutely nothing to do with eating any type of pork products.
The long, flowing hair and Caucasian features of Jesus currently being represented as the Son of God are certainly an intentional alteration from the original cultural context. Attempting to justify long-haired images for Jesus by claiming he was under a Nazarite vow is linguistic error.
From my perspective, whenever the people in power, including religious leaders, have a similar appearance to the erroneous image for the Son of God, they have a self-serving motive, not to correct the error. Consequently, the mixture and movement away from the original intention of scripture can be confusing for some people. Thereby, providing and opening for the spirit operating in organized religion to arise in power.
However, the only real powers that the spirit of organized religion has over an individual are fear and rejection. Certain religious leaders are highly skilled in making you believe that if they have rejected you, then God has rejected you. Furthermore, they depend on your lack of knowledge and willingness to suffer in silence to maintain this power.
I challenge my readers to take a quick journey with me as I unlock and reveal scriptures on marriage, divorce, and remarriage. Let me crack the religious code and open the scriptures that people moved by the spirit of organized religion do not want you to know. The Bible says, My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge
(Hosea 4:6 KJV).
False leaders are afraid that too much information will expose them as the little man behind the curtain, pulling levers, making noise, and controlling God’s people through fear. On the other hand, true leaders are never afraid of information. We should expose manipulative fear as a tool of the devil. God does not give his people a spirit of fear, nor should they be ruled or dominated by fear. Biblical leaders should love God’s people and direct them to enjoy the power, victory, and freedom that come with a life in Christ Jesus.
The Purpose
The purpose of this book is not to promote divorce. My goal is to inform and equip you with clear scriptural information on the subject of marriage, divorce, and remarriage. I’m persuaded that by exposing erroneous conclusions and replacing them with true biblical perspectives, we will see people who’ve experienced divorce in a different light. My purpose is to assist individuals with overcoming the victimization, stigmatization, isolation, embarrassment, shame, and other sorrows based in ignorance that accompany a divorce in some religious communities.
With tear-filled eyes and a heavy heart, I find myself divorced after thirty-six years of marriage. I married very early in life to a wonderful Spirit-filled lady. I was an energetic young minister doing all I understood to please God. I’m sure it is different now. However, back in those days, church leaders did not talk about compatibility, division of labor, finances, personality, temperaments, cultural diversity, dreams, ambitions, expectations, or shared values. Their main concern was your personal salvation.
The basic counseling for premarital couples consisted of a simple premise. If a husband and wife were truly saved, and prayed, everything else in their lives would work out. My beautiful eighteen-year-old wife was raised in a spiritually muddled, matriarchal family. I was raised in a Christian patriarchal family. Our worldviews were completely different from one another’s. The marriage vacillated between meeting her needs or expectations and meeting mine. Very seldom were we both satisfied at the same time.
For decades we lived as a model family. To the outside world we seemed supportive of one another and appeared to be an accomplished couple. We owned homes and cars and took really nice vacations. However, on the inside, the relationship was sprinkled with vitriol, generating misery levels that were often unbearable. All I’m willing to say about my marriage is that due to unsustainable conversation patterns, trust eroded, and eventually the marriage ended.
This is not a blame and name, tell-all book designed to titillate your natural senses. This book started as a list of scriptures I could use when speaking to my pastor friends, many of whom were extremely narrow minded on the subjects of marriage and divorce. I was going through the most agonizing time of my life and discovered there was very little clear information available on this subject. It is stated that between 31 and 50 percent of today’s society, including people in the church, are facing cracks in their relationships, which can lead to divorce. Hopefully, my little list of scriptures, which transformed into this book,