Letting Go: The Spiritual Step Technique

By REV. ROBERT D. ZANCAN

Letting Go: The Spiritual Step Technique is a spiritual self-help book. The book can be read in a couple of sessions. However, the best way to read the book is to savor its contents. The reader becomes a participant. The reader enters a new world with new beginnings and endless possibilities. Anything is possible on this journey. The sojourner must do one thing onlythey must let go. They will enter a journey where they will stop holding on to the perceived past. On the journey, the sojourner will learn a new way to let go of many issues that tear into their hearts. They will also let go of many things, such as addiction and loss. Through this journey, the sojourner will find out that the only way out of a dilemma is by going through it. When you cannot turn left or right, you move one step at a time, and the wind moves you through the narrows.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Aug 25, 2015
• ISBN: 9781514400630

REV. ROBERT D. ZANCAN

Rev. Robert D. Zancan is a Roman Catholic priest from the Diocese of Buffalo, New York. He was born and raised in New England. He has been ordained for thirty-three years. His ministry includes work with inner city gangs in Los Angeles, California, to ministry in correctional institutes in California and Colorado, and work with the homeless in New Mexico. He was caught in the chaos of the riots in Los Angeles in 1992 and assisted in the healing after the riots. He has worked with the homeless in Albuquerque, New Mexico. In addition, his ministry with wounded priests includes work in Missouri and New Mexico. He has also worked extensively with inmates in various correctional institutes. These include Desert View Correctional Institute in California and Sterling Correctional Institute in Colorado. At Desert View Correctional Institute, he was program coordinator and acting assistant warden of programs. His ministry at Desert View Correctional Institute included working with gang members and developing the curriculum for a transition program for inmates adjusting to society. This curriculum included anger management, addiction studies, group work, human development, and transition skills. He also taught the dynamics of his book Letting Go: The Spiritual Step Technique to addicts in a transitional program in Colorado. In addition to his work with inmates and the homeless, he has taught at schools in New York and Colorado. He was also a principal of an elementary school in Texas. Other educational experiences include work in Colorado in the field of special education with English-speaking students and students whose first language is Spanish. His parish work includes ministry in Massachusetts, New York, New Mexico, Texas, and California. He has also worked extensively with parishioners whose first language is Spanish. Reverend Zancan’s educational degrees include a master of divinity in theology, postgraduate certificate in education, permanent certification in New York, completion of the academic work for a master’s degree in special education, and doctoral work in education. Presently, he is pursuing a doctorate degree in education. His current ministry includes working with patients who have dementia. This is Reverend Zancan’s first book. He is working on a second book for families experiencing the effects of dementia in their loved ones.

Book preview

Copyright © 2015 by Rev. Robert D. Zancan.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

The New American Standard New Testament Greek Lexicon is based on Thayer’s and Smith’s Bible Dictionary, plus others. It is keyed to the large Kittel and the Theological Dictionary of the New Testament. These files are public domain.

Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible, © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Rev. date: 08/25/2015

Xlibris

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

711183

Contents

Acknowledgments

Prologue

How to Look at a Hologram, Power and Control and Letting Go

Demythologizing God

The Answer Is not in the Stars but in Ourselves

I’m Being Followed by a Moon Shadow

Through the Looking Glass

The Subtle Perception of the Way Things Are

Love Has Many Faces

Time to Say Good-bye

We Make the Best Decisions We Can with the Information We Have on Hand

Who Looks Outside, Dreams; Who Looks Inside, Awakes

Enlightenment Is Absolute Cooperation with the Inevitable

When the Marvelous Butterfly Takes Wing, Nothing of the Caterpillar Remains

Conclusion

Appendix

References

We live by losing, leaving, being left and letting go, and

sooner or later with more or less pain, we all must come to

know that loss is indeed a lifelong human condition.

—Judith Viorst, Necessary Losses

Never say goodbye because goodbye means going

away and going away means forgetting.

—J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

The world will break your heart ten ways to Sunday. That’s guaranteed.

I can’t begin to explain that. Or the craziness inside myself and

everyone else. But guess what? Sunday’s my favorite day again. I

think of what everyone did for me, and I feel like a very lucky guy.

—Silver Linings Playbook

This work is dedicated to

Pope Francis I

Bishop Richard J. Malone, Bishop of Buffalo

and most especially,

my dearest grandmother,

Jennie Agrella

(Requisite in Pacem)

Acknowledgments

I need to thank people who have helped me in my growth and spiritual insights. These people were there for me, in one way or another. They include the following:

My father, who gave me ego strength; my mother, who taught me the value of education and of never giving up; my sister, for being my friend when I was a young child, when I needed friendship the most; my brother, for helping me when I was ill; Kathleen and Ann Gilhooley and James Henderson, who helped me become a Catholic priest; and Fr. Mark Stelzer, Fr. George Farland, Fr. Hugh Crean, Sr. Mildred, SND, and Sr. Miriam, SND, Bishop Harry Flynn, Bishop Donald Trautman, Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz; and, most of all, my dearest grandmother, Jennie Agrella, who never stopped believing in me.

A special thanks goes out to Fr. Paul Golden, CM. In meditating on the help and support of those mentioned, I have come to the awareness that it is with their energy and love and examples of tireless service that I realize there is more work for God that needs to be done.

Prologue

The spiritual step technique is based on the experience of my work as a Roman Catholic priest with inmates and the homeless. In many ways, they are the poorest of the poor and have been used and abused, neglected, abandoned, and, in some cases, left for dead. In their desperation and anguish, they looked for something to numb their pain. Whether it was alcohol, illegal drugs, or prescription medication, their behavior led to jails, prisons, homeless shelters, or, in some cases, death. My ministry resides in healing and compassion, not in judgment or ridicule. I struggle with how I can reach them with the love of God. How can I speak of God to a human being who, through no fault of their own, was physically abused at age one, only to be found wandering the streets by the police at age two. How can I speak of God to a human being, who was born as a crack baby? How can I speak of God to human beings who sought their only source of comfort in alcohol, drugs, gangs, drive-by shootings, revenge killings, which tore families apart and often killed innocent victims? How can I write letters of God’s continence to inmates in solitary confinement who had mutilated human beings? How can I reach, with the love of God, inmates who lived among others on death row? In prayer, contemplation, scholarly work, research, and dialogue with doctors and nurses, I sought to find a way.

I sought to find a way to reach out to the misery experienced by wounded human beings because in my humanity, I know that I am a wounded healer (Nouwen 1998). Through my own suffering with health issues, I found a way to heal those whose lives had been torn apart. The way to heal them began with my own journey of health.

In 1989, I was diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder, involving mental compulsions and cleansing rituals. In my journey to health, I was treated by some of the best doctors in the world at Harvard Medical and UCLA. One of the doctors who treated me was Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz from UCLA. After a period, I began reading his books, especially The Mind and the Brain: Neuroplasticity and the Power of Mental Force, coauthored by Sharon Begley.

In the context of the work of Schwartz and Begley, they refer to an unobserved observer, and an observer. I applied that knowledge to the realm of spirituality. In addition, in becoming aware of the work of the Jesuits, Campbell, PhD and McMahon, PhD, in BioSpiritual Focusing, and their Institute for BioSpiritual Research, I explored their work and the link between focusing and spirituality (Campbell and McMahon 2012).

In addition, I was influenced by an exercise conducted by a professor in an MA master’s program at the University of Colorado Denver. I pondered the question, could the application of the research of a tetrahedron (triangular and equilateral) function as a hologram? There is transcendence, mystery, and spirituality in a hologram. I pondered, in what ways is the action of a hologram similar to the act of observing behavior and yet blessing it with the grace and the presence of a higher power. What are the dynamics of the dialogue between observing an action and becoming part of it? Does this act of observation give birth to new patterns of behavior and deep-seated virtues? In a search for answers to these questions, I continued to read articles and research in the area of applied physics, especially the book by Paul Davies, The Mind of God. In the book, he explores life and consciousness, and the work of various philosophers, including Plato, Descartes, Hume, and Kant. I continued to contemplate and integrate these findings and their connection to spirituality, transcendence, and observation.

As time passed, I continued to apply this research and these questions to my experiences of teaching inmates at a correctional institute in California. I developed a curriculum that included human development, anger management, addiction studies, and transition skills. The curriculum came from my experiences with the homeless and inmates at other correctional institutes in other states. It was the application of these experiences and in dealing with the issues of the homeless and inmates that helped in the design of the spiritual step technique.

One day, a light bulb went off in my head. The spiritual issues in addiction and in the 12-step program were deeply rooted in human development issues, which were experienced by the participants in the group and class sessions. The inmates would often refer to a view of themselves looking at their story while addressing the issues of that story. The connections to the hologram, the process of observation, transcendence, and spirituality became evident. It seemed like a hologram or triangular motion that the inmates would toggle back and forth, from looking at the context and content of their story to addressing the particular issues of their story. It seemed that the participants were involved in the act of spiritual transcendence. It was in observing the issues involved in their human development and repressed issues that they could see the interconnections between those issues and their behavior. Instead of running away from those issues, they could observe themselves with compassion and mercy. Eventually, they could see God or their higher power in their journey moving them on a journey of rebirth and growth.

Eventually, through contemplation, prayer, research, and dialogue, I refined my ideas and experiences into the Spiritual Step Technique. The technique is based on spiritual transcendence and observation, between the unobserved observer (awareness) and the observer (the act of observing). The process begins with one of the 12 steps, and the participant works through the step with various examples, similes, and metaphors of how that step applies to their life experiences. The participant toggles back and forth, from observing their issues and then observing the details of the issues. The process leads to transformation and to new birth. The participant unfolds deep-seated questions that have been uncovered through the process itself. The participant asks, what does the process give birth to? What are the lessons of the process? What are the virtues of the process?

In the section Introduction to the Spiritual Step Technique, the particular methods and meaning of the process are detailed and explained. The introduction also explains the spiritual and transcendent connection between the 12-step work and spirituality, as it transforms the participant in dealing with their issues of addiction. The participants do not have to go looking for a higher power; the higher power is involved in their lives, the issues of their lives, and in the lives of others. The technique leads to rebirth and growth.

Part of the Spiritual Step Technique is based on the work of Heisenberg. Heisenberg’s uncertainty principle is deeply rooted in the process. There are interesting issues that emerge from an application of the uncertainty principle, to the spiritual step technique. In addition, a reading and application of Everett’s many-worlds interpretation will lend credence and clarification with regard to Heisenberg’s uncertainty principle, as it relates to the spiritual step Technique. Everett’s many-worlds interpretation, points to a process of observation that is going on whether we are conscious of it or not. It is a process that includes the presence of God or a higher power, who has graciously invited us on a journey to health, serenity, and love. The technique is rooted within the movement of God or our higher power in the transformation of our humanity and addiction, from chaos to order, death to life, and darkness to light.

How to Look at a Hologram, Power

and Control and Letting Go

Letting Go

The Spiritual Step Technique: Step 1

It’s just a more uncertain world out there; there is more of a possibility of losing something, a loved one or a child. Maybe too there’s an increasing sense of powerlessness, that we don’t have as much control over the world as we used to five or ten years ago.

—Piers Handling

The road to powerlessness is paved with a focused lens

—Zancan

Step 1 of the 12 steps addresses the issue I am powerless. If we use the word powerless, we might have difficulty understanding the spiritual process of step 1. There is an inherent goodness in being powerless, and the key to this knowledge is by using the words out of focus. For example, the definition of powerless is lacking strength or power; helpless and totally ineffectual (The Free Dictionary 2014). However, if we use the words out of focus, we might have a better word. In the act of being out of focus, I am not helpless or ineffectual. When I am out of focus, because I have a certain amount of focus present, there is always something that I can do to regain a more needed and keen sense of focus. We can illustrate this point by means of a comparison with the experience of driving a motor vehicle. If I were driving a motor vehicle and lost power while enjoying the music and the scenery, I would definitely be out of focus. The sense of being out of focus would be astutely evident to my awareness and bring me to the present moment. Perhaps I can offer an example from my own life. One time, in driving from a parish in the Rocky Mountains, moving from ten thousand feet above sea level to a mile above sea level, in a severe snowstorm, I lost my front window defroster. Losing one’s defroster while driving a bus-like vehicle is not good. I was out of focus; however, I realized that some part of me was in focus. I reached behind the seat, got a battery defroster–like object, recited a litany of prayers (probably nine novenas in one), plugged it into the outlet, and it worked! I could see again. I have to admit that during the process, my imagination got the best of me, and it took a while to refocus. I had visions of being marooned and eaten by a bear or wild bobcat. However, the sense of having some sort of focus enabled me to refocus and integrate new strategies in fixing my car. In recapping this process, I observed the dynamics of driving a car that was broken but did it without preconceived notions. In this sense, I needed to let go of the process, observe the entire process, and observe the details of the process without being stuck in any one previous method or notion. This process assisted me because I was not locked into a previous method that might not have cleared my windshield.

In addition, the process of being out of focus with my car gave birth to new virtues—virtues that I can apply to other situations in my life. The process brought forth the virtues of patience, courage, and endurance. These virtues speak of mystery and process. The process of being out of focus brings with it a new focus on that which endures: faith, hope, and love. In that moment, we unfold the mystery of something greater than ourselves, perhaps the presence of God or a higher power. How can I regain focus in an event in which I, at first, thought there was no hope? The answer is shrouded in mystery. We are speaking of a deep mystery in the process itself. By peering deeply into the process of being out of focus and in focus at the same time, we move to the depths of mystery.

We are, at the core of our human existence, mysterious beings that transcend far beyond a limited interpretation or analogy. There’s always something more to know, something more to experience about our being. In this manner, we can look at focusing in a new light. Like the car analogy, the