Love Beyond Horizons: A Novel on Women’S Sex Psychology

By K S Bhardwaj

This novel is based on womens sex-psychology. Krishan devotee Noor falls in love with a Hindu. She throws all Muslim norms to winds. She forgoes even her name for love. But Shankar, the husband does with her the same which majority of husbands does. How Sambhavana fights for existence, brings up son and faces hardships such revolutionaries come across, is its central theme. Combating against lustful hawks hovering over single women she develops hatred against entire male community. When she meets Kshashank who holds women not as sex toys but as human-beings her extinguished carnal desires are reignited. Firm-resolved Sambhavana continues wooing Kshashank to give new lease to her deserted life. Feeling fully gratified she returns towards her deity saying, You have filled my life with thrills. I will never forget you for it. And yes, I will never bother you anymore like this. But if you ever feel the need, I am yours for ever without marriage which shocks Kshashank. It automatically draws readers attention to the technique of salvation Sambhog Se Samadhi propounded by Osho.
The novel delineatly deals with existentialism which French philosophers Sartre and Simone de Beauvoir struggled for throughout their lives. Happy reading.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Partridge Publishing India
• Release date: Feb 5, 2016
• ISBN: 9781482870312

K S Bhardwaj

Dr. Bhardwaj is a keen observer of women’s behaviour. He has firm faith in them. He believes since God couldn’t be everywhere He sent woman to take care of man as his mate and of kids as their mother. He laments that both have always betrayed her.

Book preview

Chapter-1

The morning congregation was in full swing. Swami Gyanender and his devotees were sitting face to face. During question hour Sambhavana, narrating her daily routine to Swamiji had asked, I go to temple. Perform puja. I read Ramayan and Bhagwad Gita daily. I often go to Goverdhan for a foot-walk round it. Still I remain disturbed. How after all shall I get peace?

Swamiji kept sitting silently. After some time he smiled a bit as if saying, You yourself are responsible for all your troubles; and funnily you are asking me how you would get rid of them. He opened his eyes, glanced at the audience and lost in his solitude once again. The audience, who was getting restless, had been looking sometime at Swamiji and at other towards Sambhavana. And the latter felt highly disturbed within her as if she had committed a grievous mistake by asking such a silly question because everyone was looking at her with interrogative looks as if saying, Why after all did you put such a foolish question to Swamiji?

But Swamiji had no doubts. He knew Sambhavana’s family background well. He knew her ardent bent of mind and deep interests very well. Neither had he any doubts about her devotion nor on her superb thoughts; neither on her efforts nor on her intentions; neither on her aims to achieve them nor on her goal. He knew very well how much devoted and firm on her mission she was. He knew no difficulties or hardships could block her way. He knew well that she is not made to retreat. She is one who never lets any doubts raise their hoods on her faith, who never lets her firm determination wave, who never lets her mind overcome her heart and who always lived in her present. But the same Sambhavana was totally dejected today.

He asked, Sambhavana, do you believe in births and rebirths?

Yes Swamiji, Sambhavana had answered briefly with her looks on the ground.

Then your puzzle could be solved easily. Try to understand that the more troubles you face in this birth, you are proceeding towards the next with a cleaner and spotless previous life. You are now facing the consequences of the earlier one. What you need only to care right now is that no further mistakes are committed in the present birth, Swamiji counselled her in very simple and comprehensible words.

Tanya, who was sitting by the side of Sambhavana commented, Swamiji, these standards of what is right and what is wrong, are very strange. How can we tackle this puzzle?

What do you mean? Make it a bit clear, had asked Swamiji.

Swamiji, with due respects I beg your pardon for being a bit straightforward. Whether it is East or West, the physical needs of the people are the same and common. These physical needs give rise to wishes. But if the means which are adopted in West to fulfill them are used in the East also, everybody starts frowning upon and making a hue and cry. The confusion about right and wrong caused by such differing attitudes, standards and measuring scales is not after all an uncommon thing, Tanya said making her doubts clear.

Swamiji’s definition of right and wrong was unique but very simple which caused great consternation among the self-styled social reformists because it actually challenged their traditional authority. So Swamiji was never liked by them at all. Swamiji said, Nothing is odd in it. Keep two things always in mind. First, whatever you do should not cause any harm or trouble to anyone else. Second, the more simple, wish-less and nature oriented life you lead, the more right you are. Do not bother at all what the people say thereafter.

Tanya asked again, What nature oriented means?

All the five drives which the human beings experience and which give rise to the desires, are nature gifted to all living beings especially to the humans. For the spiritual uplift, these are advised to be suppressed. Suppressing them is not only impossible but against the principles of nature as well. It is impossible for anyone to be fully free of these drives. When the great sages like Parshuram and Durvasa: Well-known for their anger, Narad and Vishwamitar: In the grip of their lustful desires could not overcome them, then what to talk of common people like us?

And the reasons for this Swamiji? asked Sadhna.

Reasons are simple. Being nature gifted, these are inseparable parts and parcel of the life of human beings. Therefore instead of wasting time and energy in getting rid of them, we should try to maintain a balance among them and keep them to desirable limits. When unbridled drives are balanced, they become our strengths full of positive energy with which we can achieve anything. Welfare lies not in trying to curb them but keeping an equilibrium among them which in other words, provides the true peace.

Sambhavana said, Prabhu! Is it as easy to do so as it is said? Can it be adopted and followed so easily?

Well said Sambhavana. People are sometimes in the tight grip of the circumstances also. Sometimes they face such moments that these philosophical principles become meaningless. That is why I emphasise to keep a balance among them. And if we want no rebirths; and even if we are reborn and want to be at peace to make life worth living, then this much we will have to do.

If balancing is not possible due to any desire being very intense, what should we do? asked Sambhavana.

"Sambhavana, all the desires are very intense. That is why great sages like Parshuram fumes with rage and Vishwamitar flames with lust. Menka was just an excuse that Inder sent her to disturb his meditation (Tapsya). The poor Menka was unnecessarily defamed. Had there been any other in her place, the outcome would have been the same as it happened to Menka due to being Menka; and Vishwamitar did with Menka being Vishwamitar."

"And if means to satisfy the intense desires are not available then….what should be done? Sambhavana asked again hesitatingly.

Feel contented. Realise it to be the will of the Almighty. Going against His will, will never decrease the pains but rather increase. And if the pains are increased, life will become unbearable. The situation which you are in today will persist; and may be it aggravates to a greater extent.

And if means to satisfy the desires come handy all of a sudden in due course and those means are considered immoral, then what should we do?

Morality and immorality are man-made concepts. There is no such differentiation in nature which could be labeled as moral or immoral. That is why I always advise to live by nature. If your conscience says that none will be harmed or put to any problem and your desire cools down to normal levels leading to peace of mind by doing that thing, then do that without any hesitation. Saying so, Swami Gyanender retired into silence. And his silence meant the congregation was over.

By coincidence, I was also present during this discourse. I had seen her there when she had asked for the reasons of her disturbed state of mind and its remedy. I saw that a sharp featured; cute-looking, slim but well-built physique and charmingly complexioned perplexed-lass seemed to be wavering to and fro under the worldly pressures; and that is why she had asked for the reasons and remedy of her disturbed state of mind. I also noted that even though she was not so grown up, still she was so serious and sensitive to life which made me to admire her within. I felt an inner urge to meet her. But I could not because just after the discourse she had rushed out swiftly.

□ □ □ □

Chapter-2

Sambhavana was Muslim by birth. These were perhaps the sanskars of her previous birth that ever since her childhood, she was so much devoted to Lord Krishan that no one could even know when she transformed herself from Noor to Sambhavana. Those who had seen and known her say that the more her religious family tried to oppose her leanings towards Krishan, the more faith in Hindu religion she gradually developed. Her all family members were used to take breakfast without having bath but Noor: She never took a grain of corn until she took her bath and offered prayers to her Kanha. Whether fine or ill, winters or summers: It was her daily routine. She could never let any deviation creep into it.

The family was religious but not fundamental and respected other religions too equally as it respected its own. Her father Fateh Ali Khan, assuming if Noor does not find the idol of her Lord Krishan in her small temple she would stop worshipping Him, used to quietly take the idol with all honours and hand it over to the priest of the nearby temple. But Noor was radically devoted to her Lord. She used to get up at 4 early in the mornings and after taking her bath she would stand before the small temple which she had made in the small shelf of a wall and would be fully absorbed in her prayers for not less than two hours daily. If she did not find her Lord in the temple, she would burst into tears crying for Him and until a new idol was bought, brought and placed before her in the temple to perform her usual puja, she would neither talk to anyone nor would take a morsel of food.

Such was Noor’s unflinching faith and inimitable devotion to her Lord. It seemed as if Noor was not the mortal Noor but Noor (aura) of Lord Krishan Himself.

The family members and the neighbours would often suggest her parents to marry her off at the earliest because no one knew when she might convert to Hinduism and may become a kafir.

At last the father took the hard decision one day which the fathers usually take after seeing the things going out of their hands. Since it was also widely rumoured that Noor was also involved romantically with a Hindu boy, her father arranged for the marriage of the teenaged Noor top secretly with a youth from his own religion.

The rumour was not unfounded. Actually Shankar used to sing songs especially of Lord Krishan with such devotion and in such a melodious voice that most of the audiences used to fall under his sway. And Noor was herself the noor (aura) of Lord Krishan. She fell for Shankar as well. All efforts were made that Noor does not come to know at all about her marriage. But as the Ishq (love) and Mushk (scent) can never remain hidden forever, similarly the nature also reveals all the designs of antagonists of lovers in time so that the latter could put their love to tests and come out of it unscathed.

Then it happened exactly as it was expected. Since Noor was deeply devoted to her Lord Krishan similarly she was fully lost to her lover Shankar. Just before the marriage she left her house with Shankar in such a manner that no one could know about it or about the place where she disappeared or hid with her lover. She was searched everywhere. But Noor along with her lover had left no clue behind and it looked as if both were either devoured by the earth or melted away in the skies. No one could know where they were.

And how could anyone? Within a night she had not only left her home with her lover but also had disappeared quietly into the vales of Mussorie via Dehradun wherein holding their hands in hands, they danced and sang; jumped and hopped to such an extent that they were dead tired thereafter. Thereafter peeping into each other’s eyes and losing in each other’s arms they used to start their several hours long and tireless love-games.

Noor was really Noor. Coupled with her romance-filled tight embraces and gay and sensual kisses, she would play long lasting love games with her Shankar like a fish gamboling in the ocean of love and romance. She hunted for and tasted each part of his body with her quixotic restless nimble fingers and filled her lover’s erotic life with more and more fun. The lover Shankar too would never lag behind. At this he would lap her romantically into his strong arms and would return at least four times more of each of her hugs, each of her kisses and each of her love-games. He would hunt for and measure each high and low contours of Noor’s body. Aroused by these romantic antics of her lover, Noor would leave herself sluggishly swinging into Shankar’s strong arms; and would relish and welcome each potent and erotic force on her body. When Shankar took her into his tight embrace and pressed her hard, she would be filled with ecstatic joys; and craving and sighing impatiently for more, she quite often would call upon him to repeat and repeat saying, Oh Shankar! Once more….once more…. After every round of romance, her body would be left badly bruised and severely aching but still her thirst remained unquenched and she would be longing for more and more.

It continued for about one year. Both were flying into the infinite skies of romance like a pair of swans. Enjoying each moment, none of the two could know when one full year passed! Actually it happens so when the lovers meet. Even time seems to stop.

After one year when they returned to their town, the ill-prepared Noor was holding a cute, healthy and dusky baby whom she had named Manmohan after her deity Lord Krishan and she had transformed herself from Noor to Sambhavana. Now she was fully devoted to the two: Her baby and her lover Shankar.

Shankar vetoed her proposal of changing her name several times telling her that he loves and likes her as Noor and there was no need to change her name. But Noor was Noor: Once she decided to go for anything, she would never budge from her resolve. Shankar also had to bow before her firm resolution to change her name and she was changed from Noor to Sambhavana.

On their arrival, the elders of both the communities joined together and declared, Whatever happened, let it be taken as God’s will and therefore both the youths should be given their blessings.

Thus the wise elders saved the society from blood-bath. Some miscreants present in both the communities tried to ignite the communal fire by giving air to this romantic affair but wisdom prevailed upon foolishness and the peace loving people at last heaved a sigh of relief.

But the lover who was by now dead as a lover and had turned into a husband, proved good for nothing and did the same what the male-lovers usually do after their love-mania is over. The end result of this love affair was the small baby who was in Sambhavana’s lap and the entire responsibility of upbringing of the infant had fallen on the weak shoulders of half-educated Sambhavana. In her prime of wedded life, she was left alone to fend herself and bring up her baby which was the main reasons of her disturbed state of mind expressed before Swamiji after four-five years of her troubles.

□ □ □ □

Chapter-3

Routinely the twenty five year old husband left the house daily with an excuse to find work for him and Sambhavana was left behind alone feeling suffocated and shedding tears on her fate. The husband loitered with vagabonds here and there the whole day and returned at night fully inebriated and empty handed. Leave earning a single penny; he had also taken away the small money left with Sambhavana on one pretext or the other. Now his hawk’s eyes were on her three-four trinkets. Sambhavana as a good and ideal Indian wife tried her best to bring him home. She told him almost daily that he was on wrong side of the path and kept attempting that he sees the reason; and returns to the right side but all went in vain. She also tried to draw his attention and affection towards his baby pleading for his life and future. It too failed. She reminded him of their love. But all her invocations fell flat and her hopes for a bright future for her or her child dashed to the ground. Dog’s tail is after all a dog’s tail. It will remain crocked whatever one may do. If the tail gets straightened then what kind of dogs’ tails it is? So the husband of our heroine too remained crocked like a dog’s tail. Completely tired of her futile attempts and thoroughly heart-broken due to cheatings of Shankar, she had to compromise with whatever was in her fate.

Her parent-side was not only furious due to her elopement with a youth out of her religion but also was after her life for the bad name she had brought to the family in particular and the community in general. Her parents had taken their daughter’s elopement to their heart so much and they were so much heart-broken at that that they had left the world for ever within a year of the shocking event. Her brothers considered her an eye-sore. Still, Sambhavana alias Noor reminded her brothers of their sweet childhood memories, emphasised on their blood relation, prostrated before them and begged for her pardon but the result was cipher. Brothers kept rooted to their ire and envy. All these ups and downs in the prime of her life occurred so rapidly that she did not get even a chance to decide what to do. All her hopes to get support from any possible corner were shattered. Her dreams were dashed to the ground. Relations were broken. She was left in the vast world completely alone. She was devastated.

Having no option left, she at last approached her in laws, spluttered and stuttered, cried and wailed; and shed tears pitifully before them and tried to arouse their affections at least for their only grand-son. But the stone is after all a stone! They behaved stone like. When she noticed that they too were unmoved, she threw her beloved baby Manmohan into their lap and came back home. But the in-laws were no less shameless. They rushed after her with the baby and handed over the child back to her again as if they had no blood relations with him!

Now Sambhavana was left cursing herself in loneliness. Being a woman what more she could do except crying or cursing herself because the women’s history is witness to the bitter truth that only they had to suffer due to the fallouts of their affairs involving their heart? But as the readers know well that Sambhavana was not made of the stuff which easily loses heart, she firmly resolved not to keep any relations with her husband anymore otherwise she would be burdened with more responsibilities every year and this was not at all acceptable to her now. She had already tasted the consequences of her one-sided love for Shankar. She had no more grit to tread further on such an adventurous path. She hired a small house and taking a few things with her, she left her husband forever in the prime of her life.

The esteemed readers know very well how much firm-determined she was! And even the rocks have to pave way for those who are rocklike. Though she was still unfazed but the insensitivities of Shankar had broken her undoubtedly into pieces. No doubt that she was downcast with the unfortunate events but she had not lost her heart to accept defeat so easily. That is why she had accepted to swallow the bitter pill of separation.

It is a universal truth that broken hearted people have only two options. Either they turn to be poets or revolt against the entire system. Sumitrananadan Pant, the famed Hindi poet also confirms it in one of his couplets : Virahi hoga pahla kavi, aah se upja hoga gaan (The first poet ought to have been lovelorn and heartbroken and therefore the wails from his heart must have flowed out to make his first song) or they turn revolutionaries: Revolt against traditions, protest against customs, rebel against families, uprise against system, and sometimes they revolt even against the Creator of the universe because nothing soothes them during those sad moments when they feel cheated and deceived by the near and dear. Our esteemed readers know very well that being less educated, our heroine could never have turned to composing poetry; so she went for the second option and jumped into the inferno of protests against the social system and even her deity Lord Krishan.

Kicking the male dominated society she set out to stand on her own feet. The patriarchal system especially her husband’s anti-social group raised a hue and cry against her in the beginning but facing the situation singlehandedly and boldly, she did not budge even an inch from her self-taken decisions and stood her ground firmly. Tired and humiliated by her stiff resistance, everyone fell into line. It is absolutely true when women take a firm resolution to do anything, they can achieve the unachievable. She had won the battle on one front but she was still to step towards earning well for an honourable livelihood.

Oh! The depraved women!

It was really better for her that the realities of her husband came to her notice so soon. Had she remained under her illusions, nobody knows how many Manmohans might have landed into her lap and we might have to give lots of twists and turns to our story. We being writers might have succeeded in managing the further developments and might have been successful in manipulating our story. But what might have happened of and to poor Sambhavana, neither her brothers could have guessed nor her deity Lord Krishan helped her. We too might have been groping into the dark alleys of our story to find solutions to her fresh problems.

Its good and favourable outcome was her self-realisation that she was miserably alone in this vast, heartless and cruel world and it will be like living in a fool’s paradise to