A Tortured Soul

By Gracie Lane

This book is a true story about how I was sexually abused from the time I was a small child into my adulthood. I talk about when a neighborhood boy and myself was kidnapped off my front porch by a stranger.
My story goes on to talk about my mom being a divorced mother of two. She went to her sister and asked if she could babysit my older brother and myself while she worked? During that time I was sexually abused by my uncle and two of my cousins.
My book talks about when my mom had met a man and had a baby with him. It goes on to talk about how much my moms, my brother and my life would change from that point on. It talks about our family vacations. How we dressed, from the type of clothes to the school and kids we were around.
This book will tell you how I came to admire and adore this man as my father. How I would put in a little extra work to make him proud of me. Or how I would want to spend time with him like a daughter and father do together. How I felt that I had let him down, when I was nineteen years old.
My story then comes to the point where my world came crashing down ( and my drug use began) at the age of twenty one, when the man I came to look so highly up to raped me.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Aug 6, 2015
• ISBN: 9781503586482

Gracie Lane

I was born and raised in a north eastern state with two brothers from my mom. I also have a brother and sister from my dad that lives in another state. My parents were divorced when I was very young, so I had to split my time with both of them. I grew up with having a step dad and a step mom, both I thought were very good to me while growing up. I had a difficult time when I was in grade school and was then tested and found out, I had a learning disability. Growing up, it was easy for me to make friends with my peers and with teachers that I had while in school. I did graduate high school and made my parents and myself proud. I had met a young man while in high school and we had a baby together. The father and I ended up getting married, but the marriage didn't last long. I raised our son (that has challenges himself) alone except for the help that I received from my mom. Over the years his father and I have reconnected and have become good, close friends and help our child any way we can, together. We are now grandparents to a wonderful grandchild that brightens our days. Never thought I could love someone as much as I do my own child, until our grandchild enter our lives and I love him just as much. It took me over 20years to write this book due to the people that are involved. I didn't and don't want to hurt anyone. I have always protected the ones that I love. I needed to write this book for a couple different reasons. Frist, for myself help and healing. I've found out that writing is therapeutic for me. I also wrote this book hoping that it might help someone that may be going through the same or close to the same as I did within my life. Also, If this book helps one person, then something good has come out of what I went through in my life. I'm still single but that's ok with me. I have God, family, my best friend (sister) Kaye and close friends that stand by my side and are there if and whenever I was to need them.

Book preview

Copyright © 2015 by Gracie Lane.

Library of Congress Control Number:   2015911835

ISBN:      Hardcover      978-1-5035-8647-5

                Softcover       978-1-5035-8649-9

                eBook            978-1-5035-8648-2

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Rev. date: 07/23/2015

Xlibris

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This book is a true

story about how I was sexually abused from the time I was a small child into my adulthood. I talk about when a neighborhood boy and my self was kidnapped off my front porch by a stranger.

My story goes on to talk about my mom being a divorced mother of two. She went to her sister and asked if she could babysit my older brother and myself while she worked? During that time I was sexually abused by my uncle and two of my cousins.

My book talks about when my mom had met a man and had a baby with him. It goes on to talk about how much my mom’s, my brother and my life would change from that point on. It talks about our family vacations. How we dressed, from the type of clothes to the school and kids we were around.

This book will tell you how I came to admire and adore this man as my father. How I would put in a little extra work to make him proud of me. Or how I would want to spend time with him like a daughter and father do together. How I felt that I had let him down, when I was nineteen years old.

My story then comes to the point where my world came crashing down (and my drug use began) at the age of twenty one, when the man I came to look so highly up to raped me.

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I t was a warm cozy no clouds in the sky kind of night, where my family lived. I was about three years of age playing on the front porch of my house, with the little boy named James from across the street.

We had no worries (so we thought) in the world. His parents, older brother, sister and our landlord were in our house with my mom and older brother visiting, as we all normally did.

A man came up to us and asked. Do you kids want some candy? The man asked us, as he was putting his hands in the pockets of the long trench coat he had on. We were young kids, that didn’t know we weren’t supposed to talk to strangers. We both said yes, that we did want some candy. The stranger acted nice and was dressed nice as well. He was a clean cut looking guy. He was tall with dark short hair. He was a white man, in his mid-forties to early fifties. The man just kept going on digging in one pocket after the other saying, I know that I have some candy here somewhere.

After a few minutes he said to us, Well my car is right here, let’s go and see if I have some in there ok. So we went in the alley that was next to the house where his car was parked. It was a long green car with a black top. The man went and opened the passenger side door and then he opened the glove box, acting like he was looking for candy. He then said to us Well I guess I’ve ran out, let’s go to the store to get you kids some candy. We didn’t think about the danger. We didn’t know or understand there are some bad people out there in the world. Dang, I really learned quickly just how bad people could really hurt you.

The man told us to get in his car so we could go get some candy and that he would bring us back to our parents. We didn’t know any better because of our age at the time, so we got in his car. I remember him taking us to a place where I could see a bunch of tall buildings and lots of lights. The lights that I remember, were bright as they lit up the sky. I know now, that they were the down town lights that I was seeing.

James was in the back seat while I was in the front seat. The car came to a stop and it wasn’t at any store. I became scared, my heart began to beat really fast and began to shake all over. What are you doing? I asked the stranger. He looked over at me and said to me, Don’t scream, don’t move, I won’t kill you it and I’ll take you two back to your parents. As he was reaching for me also saying Shhh, it’s ok, there’s an ant down there (as he pointed between my legs) that I have to get it for you. The man told James to stay where he was and not to look in the front seat or he would be in trouble. He said that he would hate to have to kill us.

T his great big fear came all over my body. From the top of my head to the bottom of my feet went numb from fright, as the man was pulling my pants down. No! Help me! I started yelling. Leave me alone! Don’t do that to me! I’m telling my mom on you! I was screaming at the stranger. It was horrible… I kept yelling that over and over, until the man put one hand on my leg and the other squeezed my arm so tight, that it felt like he was cutting the blood off. As our eyes locked, I saw the meanest look that I’ve ever seen on someone. Shhh, and in a deep strong, stern voice, he said to me I have to get it, you need to sit still right now!"

I had no clue what the man was talking about, because I knew that I had nothing down there. At that time in one swift movement, he was putting his hands down between my legs, pulling them apart, he was hurting me. His hands was all over me, between my legs. I was wondering why he wasn’t