The Color of Change: Meet the New Faces of White Supremacy

By Pernell D. Saulsberry Sr.

My name is Pernell Demetrius Saulsberry Sr and I was born in Memphis, Tennessee on May 23rd, 1964; I am the older of two males. I was raised between two historical cites; three blocks from Mason Temple and five blocks from the Lorraine Motel during the civil rights movement. Growing up in Memphis in the 60s and 70s as a young African American was challenging because I was in the middle of two generations with different views of African Americans place in America. My grandparents were old southerners raised in Mississippi during the 20s and 30s with little civil rights. My mothers siblings were college graduates and civil rights activist. The views of both generations help shape me and give me direction but more important to me give me a since of pride for myself and respect for all. I am a widow and the father of four children. I am an artist with a degree in business and will graduate with a bachelor degree in Organizational Leadership from the University of Memphis in 2014.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Jun 12, 2014
• ISBN: 9781499032406

Pernell D. Saulsberry Sr.

My name is Pernell Demetrius Saulsberry Sr and I was born in Memphis, Tennessee on May 23rd, 1964; I am the older of two males. I was raised between two historical cites; three blocks from Mason Temple and five blocks from the Lorraine Motel during the civil rights movement. Growing up in Memphis in the 60’s and 70’s as a young African American was challenging because I was in the middle of two generations with different views of African American’s place in America. My grandparents were old southerners raised in Mississippi during the 20’s and 30’s with little civil rights. My mother’s siblings were college graduates and civil rights activist. The views of both generations help shape me and give me direction but more important to me give me a since of pride for myself and respect for all. I am a widow and the father of four children. I am an artist with a degree in business and will graduate with a bachelor degree in Organizational Leadership from the University of Memphis in 2014.

Book preview

CHAPTER I

The Encounter

July 29, 1999, one of the hottest days of the year, the Jackson family is on the highway headed home just a few miles from a gas station off Highway 78. Mario and Shekita Jackson along with their two sons are about to pull over and gas up their SUV. They are still talking about the visit to Mario’s parent’s house.

All I am saying is that it is hard being a black man today. Look at my brother, every time he steps outside, the police mess with him, he can’t get a break, said Mario as he looks over at his wife with a serious look on his face.

Maybe if he stop breaking into people’s houses and stops stepping outside with someone else’s stuff then the police would stop mess with him. I can’t believe that boy was videoed coming out of a window trying to steal a little dog! He can’t take care of his self so how in the hell is he going to take care of a dog, asks Shekita with a puzzled look on her face.

I know Dad said that when they got him out of jail, he said a dude paid him ten dollars to get his dog back from his ex-girlfriend, but the owners were a gay couple, says Mario while trying to keep from laughing.

You know how crackheads work? says Shekita with a big smile on her face.

What? Mario asks.

Yea, only crackheads risk their life and freedom for ten dollars. Am not calling your brother a crackhead, am just saying he has crackhead habits, he is doing crackhead work. Then she laughs and then a few seconds later, Mario laughs too.

They both laugh, and as they come up on the gas station, they saw the sign for a few miles back.

They are on their way home from visiting Mario’s parents in Memphis. This is a trip the Jacksons take once a year to let the kids spend some time with their grandparents and other family members. They rotate the trip so they are seeing both sets of grandparents at least once a year. The next trip will be to Shekita’s parents for Christmas. This is also a trip that Shekita does not look forward to because her mother keeps trying to convince her to move closer to them so she can see the boys more; but Shekita knows this is not the only reason. Shekita’s mother loves to try to run her life. This is also the same reason Mario moved away from home—his mother has control issues also. Although Shekita gets along with Mario’s parents, she still feels that there is something about her they do not like. Shekita has a master’s degree in education and teaches at a local high school back home. Mario was a high school football and basketball star with a lot of college offers but had to wait because he became a father in his senior year; this was before he met Shekita. Mario is a truck driver for a medical supply company and wants to open his own business. Mario is a great cook and would like to open a restaurant in the downtown area back home. He and Shekita have been saving, and they think they will be ready to open next summer.

They pull into a gas station and Mario gets out of the truck and stretches before pumping the gas while his wife gets some money out to get some snacks. Mario stands between his Ford Explorer and the gas pump. He takes his wallet out of his back pocket to get his credit card out to pay for the gas. He inserts his credit card in the credit card slot on the gas pump and enters his PIN into the pump and waits for the begin pumping and starts pumping. Mario sets the pump handle and releases it then looks through the side window at his two boys who are sitting in their car seats watching him. The boys see Mario looking at them then they start to laugh because Mario is making funny faces at them. Shekita gets out of the truck to go inside the gas station and buy some snacks for the family. Mario tells her what he wants her to bring him back.

Hey, baby, get me two hotdogs and a large Coke, says Mario as he is looking at the pump to see how much gas he is pumping.

No, because hotdogs give you gas, and my window does not go all the way down. I like to have passed out from the two you ate on the way to your parents, and the smell is still in the truck. So no, I will find you something that will not make our eyes burn, said Shekita with a frown.

Ha-Ha, very funny, said Mario as he frowns back at her.

Shekita heads inside and walks around the store looking for snacks for her and her husband and their two boys. Mario stops making faces at the boys and walks around the truck checking out the tires of the Bronco when he gets to the last tire an old green Chevy pickup truck pulls up to the pump next to Mario’s but he doesn’t pay it any attention. Mario stops and thinks about his family and how glad he was to see them all. He laughs as he thinks about the excuses his brother gives for going to the jail so much. It is always someone else’s fault and not the fact that he is doing wrong. He wants to help his brother get help but knows he doesn’t think he needs it. He always claims he is not on drugs, but the whole neighborhood knows he is on drugs; and if something is missing, then his brother is the likely suspect. As a child, his brother was the most popular kid in school and was a good athlete also.

The driver of the green truck sits inside for a few minutes then gets out. He is watching Mario for a minute. Then the driver gets out of his truck and stands outside of it with the door open. He is tall and slim; the driver is wearing some old jeans with a long sleeve t-shirt, with a short sleeve blue work shirt and orange hunting vest. His John Deer baseball cap is pulled down close to his eyes and covers most of his face. The man turns and glances at Mario, but Mario can’t really tell what the man looks like. The man doesn’t speak; he walks in to the gas station. Shekita is standing in line waiting to check out when she sees a man that looks like her brother-in-law. It makes her laugh and thinks back about the trip to her in-laws and how she is glad that the trip is finally over. She thinks about how she hates the trip to visit her husband’s family, but always gets a good laugh from the brother-in-law who stays in jail and thinks that he is always being framed to the drug addicted uncle that steals and tries to sell what he just stole back to the people he just stole from; and the twenty-two-year-old cousin with the five kids with five different dads and brags about all the child support money she gets but is always being evicted from her home for not paying the rent. She does not pay attention to the man who just walked in the store, he walks by and grabs a beer out of the giant barrel used as a cooler filled with beer and ice near the register, and then he gets in line behind Shekita. He looks at Shekita from head to toe then he steps a little closer to her. The man is standing very close to Shekita in the line. Shekita steps up to put some distance between her and the man. The man steps up also; he is standing so close that he is touching her back. Shekita steps up again and so does the man. Shekita turns around to face the man and stares him in the eyes for a few seconds then she speaks.

You’re pulling that shit on the wrong person. You need to back off me! You are only going to get one warning. I ain’t in the mood for your shit or your little fantasy!

Then a voice calls out to break the tension.

Next! Can I help the next person in line?

The cashier asks, and then he repeats it in a higher tone.

Can I help the next person, please?

The cashier is getting nervous because they are ignoring him and he sees the man reaching around to his back. The man is giving the cashier a bad feeling and he is starting to shake. The man is just standing there listening, taking the verbal thrashing she is giving him with no emotion. His face is blank. He stares Shekita in the eye but does not blink. Shekita’s heart is racing because the man is giving her the creeps, not because of his action, but the lack of emotion to her reaction. He stands there as if he has ice water in his veins.

The cashier reaches under the counter and places his hand on a baseball bat he has hidden under the counter. The cashier is getting very nervous because he is afraid Shekita’s assault on the man may result in an assault by the man on both of them.

I don’t need this shit! the cashier says to himself.

The cashier thinks back to the last time he pulled the bat out on someone. They took it from him and chased him down the street. His coworkers still tease him about it because the police caught the person and it was a sixteen-year-old girl with a mental disorder. He wanted to ignore them but they were five feet from him. Again, the cashier asks as his voice starts to quiver with fear, on the thought of what may happen.

"Can− can− I help the next person in, in line please?" said the cashier as he stumbles over his words.

Shekita turns slowly and steps up to the register and slams her items on the counter. She starts talking to herself in a low tone but just loud enough for the cashier and the man to hear her.

I don’t know who he thinks he is getting all up on me like that. I bet if I kick him in his old rusty nuts, he get off me. And this scary ass cashier ain’t doing shit but stand here and watch with this ‘can I help the next person in line shit.’ Funky ass redneck, thinks he owns the world. Shekita is very outspoken and it has caused her problems in the past. Mario has often told her she needs to control her temper.

The man just stands there looking at Shekita as he starts to crack a little smile when the right corner of his mouth rises slightly. The cashier asks Shekita if she found everything she needs and as he rings up her purchases. Shekita does not answer, she just pays for her items, picks up her bag, and walks out the door. She doesn’t look back as she exits. She hears the cashier as she gets to the door.

Sir, can I help you? Sir, did you find everything you need?

The