Product of My Environment: How It Began

By Centoria Cousin

Can Zanity survive in a world where her enemies are her friends? With
her eighteenth birthday approaching she is happy to retire every dress
in her closet, and graduate from high school. She is also expecting a big
check from her deceased fathers insurance policy. She plans to escape the
clutches of her alcoholic mother as soon as turns eighteen, but with her
new found love life between herself, and two men her mother will soon
become the least of her worries. Can she handle two lovers? Can she even
trust them? In the blink of an eye Zanity and everything in her world will
change. Will Zanity escape her environment, or become it?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Oct 24, 2012
• ISBN: 9781479716982

Centoria Cousin

Centoria Cousin

Book preview

CHAPTER ONE

Hi I’m Zanity

Dear diary,

March 1st 2007,

I guess I should start this out by saying I’ve never had a diary. So um here it goes.

Hi I’m Zanity. I guess I should be formal, and consider you as some type of friend. So I’ll tell you a little about the man, that gave you to me. My father. He died one year ago, the year before that he gave you to me. I never used you before, because nothing exciting ever seems to go on in my life. But it’s my senior year in high school! So maybe that will finally change.

I guess I should tell you a little about my daddy. His name was Arnie. He was a six foot four, two hundred and seventy-five pound white man, with the most beautiful green eyes. I miss him more then any word’s could describe. But we still live in the same house that we lived in before he died so that’s a plus. We’ve lived here since I was born. Sometimes I think I can feel him. Or I get a whiff of his favorite cologne out of nowhere. I never wanna leave this house.

He died in a liquor store robbery. He was only there to get alcohol for my booze hound mother. I still don’t understand why she’s so addicted to it. I always thought we were to happy a family for something like a alcoholic woman of the house. Anyway my father was always my hero. My mom was ok when he was around too, but she’s way to much to bear now!. She’s so fucking strict, and I don’t even like her, because in my eyes she may as well had shot my daddy herself. However I do love her, so I guess I can tell you a little about her too.

Her name is Zahari. She is a beautiful buttermilk brown Nigerian woman. She was born and raised in Nigeria until she turned twenty-one. She married my daddy, and they moved to New Jersey. But anyway. Since my daddy has been gone my life is a wreck. For outsiders looking in I’ve always been blessed. And some may even say spoiled. But they don’t know Zahari. And I’m tired of her shit.

We’ve never been a steady church going family, but ever since my daddy died she’s been making me wear dresses everywhere I go! And since I’m getting old, and cant fit any of my old jeans, (and don’t want her hitting me every time she finds a pair) I can’t really sneak.

I don’t think my mother has seen the inside of a church in ten years. She couldn’t even go to my fathers funeral, because she was too drunk, and she passed out. I stole her car and went with my best friend Amy. I have my own key to her car because she’s usually to loaded to drive. I can’t wear a pair of jeans for the life of me, but she rarely even trips about me stealing her car.

But that’s all about to change, because, Ill be eighteen in July. So she wont be able to control what I put on this sexy body of mine. She tries so hard to cover up all this beauty! And when my birthday hits I’m gladly retiring every dress in my closet, even the sexy ones! (Maybe not the sexy one’s), and then I’m proudly stepping out in a pair of hip huggers that might get my virginity taken!

See I’m young, sexy, hot, and steamy, stacked right in every place to be stacked. And yet still a fucking virgin. My eyes are a stunning combination of light brown, and dark gray with little specks of green. Redbone to death with dimples, and perfect lips.

My breast are an astounding thirty-eight C. I have Ciara’s waist line with a Beyonce booty! My hips are shapely, but you can tell I’m a virgin. My hair is jet black with blue streaks for now, but I might go green next month. Yep all that hiding behind dresses, and a virginity!

I mean don’t get me wrong I know being a virgin is great, but I’m seventeen now, and I think I’ve been waiting a little too long! And to be honest a bitch is straight horny! So da virginity has got to go. Well that’s all for now I gotta go catch da bus.

Zanity

*     *     *

ZANITY! ZANITY! ZAHARI screamed. What ma? Zanity said walking down the stairs. What de hell are ye doin? Ya gonna miss de bus chile. Zanity’s mother Zahari screamed in her Nigerian accent. Though she had been living in Queens since one year before she got pregnant with Zanity she never lost her accent.

If you would leave me be I could put my boots on. Zanity replied, rolling her eye’s, and trying to walk past Zahari. She wouldn’t let Zanity pass, because she noticed how short her dress was. Are you kidding me what do you have on? That short slutty dress should be considered a night gown. Ma, Zanity sighed. Short yes. Slutty no. My birthday is in a few months could I just wear jeans? Zanity pleaded. You can wear jeans on your birthday, for now you can go change into another dress chile! Zanity looked at her watch and said, no time. As she ran pass Zahari to put her boots on. Zahari shook her head and went back into the kitchen where the love of her life awaited her Jack Daniels.

Zanity was ecstatic, she managed to get out of the house in a strapless, green and pink, before the knee Gucci dress. She was so excited that she ran to the bus stop thinking her mother might call her back in the house and let her drive her car to school just to get her to change her clothes.

Zanity sat in the same spot on the bus everyday she used to do it just because, but for the last four months she’d been dating Ray-Ray, and she was now doing it to keep his seat warm. He’s the reason she’s so ready to shake her dresses. Zanity was so eager to loose her virginity she felt like Ray-Ray might just be moving to slow. And if she could just show off her curves more he wouldn’t be able to resist her.

Zanity had been in love with Ray-Ray since she was in sixth grade. And no doubt Ray-Ray was fine. Only eighteen years old standing at 6 "4, dark as the special dark Dove bar with braids to the middle of his back. Zanity cringed at the thought of him with another girl.

"Yeah my baby stop." Zanity thought as the bus arrived at Ray-Ray’s stop. He got on the bus fly, as usual rockin a black and blue Sean John sweat suit, with the new blue and black Jordan’s. Zanity watched him intensely, taking in every inch of him. In her mind she was eating him alive with her eyes.

When he sat down she bear hugged him as if she hadn’t just seen him yesterday. He hugged her back and kissed her neck causing her to squeeze her legs closed tightly and stop imagining them naked in his bed.

Hi baby what’s been goin down? Zanity asked. Everything lil mama! But how you been beautiful? I been cool other than that bitch bein on my back! Baby I told you to stop talking bout yo old lady like that. She aint that bad. She just drink to much. Ray-Ray said.

Baby please don’t start defending that woman! You know how she is! She makes me wear dresses and has never been sober enough to do anything besides go to work! Well at least she go to work. Z. and dats besides da point anyway da bottom line is dat she yo mama. And she only make you wear dresses cuz she love you, and at least you got one! You got one too Ray, and they aint much different if you ask me! Zanity replied,

Man please! I told my mama I needed money for dat court fine fa beating dude ass dat was beating her ass over some C-Rock she stole from him, and she told me to go to jail! He said, looking at Zanity intensely. Well how you gone get da money? And how much is it? I could steal it from my ma purse. She would never know. Zanity said seriously. See there you go again. Ray-Ray said pointing his finger at her. I told you to stop that shit too. I’m a man you know I can handle my own. I only asked her to see what she was gone say. She worst than yo mama and you know it! But I still wouldn’t do half da shit you do. Z.

Well baby we’re here, so give me a kiss that will last until lunch, we are still on for Chocolate & Toffee Coffee shop right? Zanity asked. So happy that she got out of that conversation before it even started, Of course sweetie one o’clock right? You know what time we go to lunch boy! She laughed and gave him a peck on the lips. OK baby I’ll be at cha locker at twelve fifty-five. Ray-Ray said as they walked off the bus. He gave her one last peck on the lips, before they parted ways.

CHAPTER TWO

Best Friends

AS SOON AS Zanity made it to her locker her best friend Amy snuck up on her, and put her hands over Zanity’s eyes and said Guess who? Zanity turned around and hugged her best friend which had been there ritual since they were five.

They both had P.E first period, However attending it is something they never did. So where we goin today? Zanity asked. While throwing her book bag into her locker. Well. Amy hesitated. Well what? Bitch? Zanity questioned with a little laugh. Amy looked Zanity up, and down before answering, trying to figure out her mood. She seemed fine so Amy got straight to the point. I need to go downtown and check out some shoes fa my boo. His birthday is next week. Amy smiled. Oh well. I might just go to gym for the first time ever. Zanity said as she bent over to