Way of the Asshole: The 49Th Law

By Aaron L. Smith

Aaron Smith is a stand-up comedian, writer, and an unofficial sociologist. Born and raised in the Harlem section of Manhattan, in New York City, he is the eldest of two children. Aaron brings his point of view to light and shows you how it can be used in your everyday life. His blunt and sometimes harsh honesty tells it how it is and shows that many people like to hide from the ugly truth. He provides a way of being someone out of the ordinary and a lifestyle that some have but never go the whole nine yardsThe Way Of The Asshole. It is more than just a name for calling someone or saying to someone when you dont agree with them. Maybe just call yourself one because you think its cool. Being an asshole is more than just saying it, you have to be about it. You must live, breathe, eat and sleep it in everything you do. And this is a start in the right direction.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Mar 30, 2010
• ISBN: 9781450029308

Book preview

Copyright © 2010 by Aaron L. Smith.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Xlibris Corporation

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

74302

Contents

INTRODUCTION

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 7

CHAPTER 8

CHAPTER 9

CHAPTER 10

CHAPTER 11

CHAPTER 12

CHAPTER 13

CHAPTER 14

CHAPTER 15

CHAPTER 16

CHAPTER 17

CHAPTER 18

REFERENCES

Special thanks to Omar Mitchell for making this book possible.

To my mom Sharisse and my sister Namreh, with love.

image001.jpg

Main Entry: ass·hole

Pronunciation: \'as-(h)ōl\

Function: noun

Date: 14th century

1 usually vulgar : anus

2  a usually vulgar : a stupid, incompetent, or detestable person b usually vulgar : the worst place—used in phrases like asshole of the world; a really cool person who deals with stupidity on a regular basis

INTRODUCTION

I’ve decided to write this book because I just got tired of the bickering and bullshit that goes on in everyday life. As I see it the world is a whacked out unbalanced place. Day in and day out the foolishness is on-going. From people who get jobs they don’t deserve to women who nag and complain there isn’t a good man when one is staring them in the face. Let’s not forget the men who treat their women like shit and wonder why they become lesbians. Ooops better be careful that line could get me in trouble. Really though I’m here to teach a valuable lesson and if you stick to this book and follow my advice you just might learn something!!! Let’s get straight to the point. No I’m not a fancy professor with a hundred degrees stuck up on his wall (probably). Nor am I a so-called expert that gets paid to talk a bunch of crap that you probably already know and may not be relevant to you anyway. I’m an ordinary guy trying to prove a point that everyone YES everyone is indeed an asshole. You may show it in your own unique way or maybe you haven’t tapped into the full inner prick within you. Don’t be alarmed this can only be a good thing because people throughout the ages have used their arrogance and ignorance alike to get away with so much shit it’s Ridiculous. For example: One of the most famous Republican assholes of our time got YOU YES YOU the American people to vote for him even though he could barely spell his own name. The amazing part is not only did he manage to get into the White House once, he got in for two terms!!!!!!! Oh yeah, you know who i am talking about but you just might be ashamed to to admit it.

But I digress this is not to dwell on the past but only as an example of how the asshole is alive and well in everyday life. This book will teach you YES YOU the reader to look to within yourself to reach your full potential as a great asshole.

A word to the wise before you continue reading (because i just know you want to keep reading.) Like all things taught you can implement these methods in your daily life. but take them into context. So, I don’t necessarily promote going around and pissing everyone off just because you think it’s cool; but I hey don’t blame you for thinking that because I fight the urge to do that on a regular basis. We all have days when the world feels like it is crashing down around us and that the only way to feel better is finding the nearest happiest thing and busting it in the mouth preferably with your fist or optionally with the hardest thing that you can find. However before you go around making people and things one with your pain take in this thought . . . let it sink in . . . and realize that one as awe inspiring as that would be you must remember that no one likes jail. NO ONE! And what does that leave your victim is walking around though ego and face scarred SCOTT FREE!!!!. But you will be the one behind bars clinching your butt cheeks prying away from your cell mate a 6'8" 350 lb guy named Princess Magenta . . . now that I got your attention, and given you a disclaimer lets get back to the point. The whole fact is True Assholes are a dying breed very few of us are out here and succumbing to the boring conformist ways of the world and that just ain’t right. It is your right to be an egotistical chauvinistic jerk. I say it loud THAT IT IS YOUR GOD GIVEN RIGHT to be whoever you want, however you want, wherever you want and God dammit that’s how we all should live!! Assholes we make the world go round and if it wasn’t for us it is a very scary place indeed and quite boring. People should be allowed to live life the way they want it. YOU should be able to live life the way you want . . . but the stuggle is hard my asshole in training and there are many obstacles to overcome. Between the laws, jack offs, punk asses, and lames that want to bring you down, you have a bunch of low life haters adding to the mix and you know why??? Its because deep down they know that they will never be as hard as you. And if the cant get with the program if you will then they are useless to you and they all need to play in traffic during the Daytona 500. Well that’s the intro and if you’re in the bookstore contemplating whether or not to put this book back On the shelf I leave you with this . . . it only get better and if you like to laugh to your heart’s content. Sit back, relax, put to the kids to bed, and step into my world. The wonderful

Reviews for Way of the Asshole

[Zame Rijhoff · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Can't rate it cuz I can't read it... The grammar and typos and shit are ridiculous bro.. I liked the idea and wanted to read it but dude you need an editor.. every author needs one. It doesn't mean u suck. Means u suck at editing.