Surrendered My Heart to A Cold Love

Introduction

Surrendered my heart to a cold love 2

By Kelly Marie

1

Wahlid Augustus

As soon as those words flowed out of Mercy’s mouth, Essence’s mouth dropped. Then that look of shock was instantly replaced with a look of anger, and I knew that shit was about to go all the way fucking left.

What the fuck did she just say, Wahlid? Essence’s face balled up as she stared up into my face with her hand on her hips.

Mannnnn, was the only thing that came out of my mouth, and I ran a hand down my face.

Wahlid!

I looked down into Essence’s face, and I was stuck because I had fucked up by not telling her the truth and seeing the hurt in her eyes was fucking with me. It had been a while since I gave a fuck about somebody else’s feelings, but Essence managed to change all that in no time.

So, you didn’t tell your girl that you were married? Mercy’s annoying ass voice rang in my ears, and I looked down at her.

Yo, chill, Mercy.

Wahlid, for real? I asked you if you had a girl, and you told me no! Essence snapped.

Well, he doesn’t, because I’m his wife, bitch!

Essence moved so quickly I didn’t get a chance to grab her before she rushed around me and stood in Mercy’s face.

"Bitch, where the fuck was you while your husband was spending time with me?"

Don’t worry about all that, hoe. Just know he’s back with me, homewrecker thot!

They went back and forth until I stepped between them.

Alright, chill.

This wasn’t the shit I wanted, but I couldn’t blame nobody but myself. I thought it was going to be easy just to stop what I was building with Essence and deal with Mercy.

Essence was screaming at Mercy with her arms flailing around, and I grabbed her wrists to get her attention, which worked because she moved her focus from Mercy to me.

I’m sorry, E. I should have told you the truth.

Everyone who knew me, knew that I wasn’t an apologetic motherfucker, but Essence deserved that, and so much more.

She looked up at me with her mouth hung open.

You really gonna apologize to this hoe in front of me? Mercy snapped and pushed my back since it was facing her.

I dropped Essence’s wrists and turned to face Mercy.

Although I had caused this shit, it was taking everything in me not to snap her fucking neck.

Shit, that would solve all my problems if I did!

Mercy, don’t act like you don’t fucking know me and what I’m about. Take your ass in the fucking house before I forget why you’re here and break my foot up in your ass. Don’t act like you’re innocent in all of this shit, I said through clenched teeth.

Wahlid, Mercy breathlessly called my name.

I tilted my head and looked at her, daring her to finish whatever sentence she started. Like I said, I caused this shit by not being straight with Essence from the beginning, but Mercy wasn’t gonna act like she was fucking innocent, and I was just fucking around. That was far from the truth, and she knew that shit.

She had no room to question me.

Knowing I wasn’t fucking around, she huffed, turned around, and went into the house, closing the door behind her. I watched the door for a second just to make sure, and then I turned to face Essence. When I did, she was gone.

Fuck! I rubbed the back of my neck and sighed.

I looked all up and down my street, but she was nowhere around. That shit started to fuck with me because I wanted to explain even though I should have done that shit before now. It’s just that I was done with Mercy and this fuck ass marriage, which was the only reason why I went after E the way I did.

Mercy and I got married two years ago after dating for less than a year. She was someone I fucked with as a teen, and we lost contact once we finished school. So, when I ran into her again, we started back up, and eventually, I asked her to marry me. Shit was good, well I thought it was until six months ago when I heard her talking to her home girl.

My eyes closed as my mind brought me back to that night I found out that my wife wasn’t shit!

I can’t believe he would cheat on me like that! And with that hoe! Brittany cried, and I sighed because whenever her crying ass came over to complain, that shit would go on all fucking night.

After being out all day and night, all I wanted to do was eat, shower, and fuck, but with Brittany there, I knew I wasn’t gonna get any pussy.

Sucking my teeth, I decided I would just go to Amario’s crib and crash because I knew it was gonna piss me off that I couldn’t get any if I stayed.

I turned to walk right back out but hearing Mercy’s response made me stop in my tracks.

Brit, I told you already, we gotta beat these niggas at their own games! All niggas cheat, I told you that! And I told your ass to fucking cheat back, just like I am. Every chance I get, I hop on another nigga’s dick because I know Wah is out there like that. While he’s out there playing around, best believe I’m getting mine.

That shit hit me because I had never stepped out on Mercy. A bitch hadn’t even sniffed my dick.

I grew up seeing my dad treat my mama like a queen, and he made sure to instill that into me and Amario. So, when I was with someone, I was only with them. Hearing that my wife was fucking other niggas did something to me.

And I told you that Wahlid wasn’t out there like that, Mercy. He’s one of the good guys. You shouldn’t do him like that. You’re lucky.

I don’t know that! And if he’s not, he could change one day, and I’ll be damned if he has me out here looking stupid. Plus, if he isn’t cheating, what he doesn’t know won’t hurt. But, either way, I’m gonna do me until the day I die. Fuck being faithful. Only fools do that.

The anger that rushed through my body brought me out of my trance, and I opened my eyes.

That night, I cussed Mercy’s ass out and threw her out of my fucking house.

If Brittany hadn’t been there, I probably would have killed Mercy. I had given her my all; she had all of me and did me like that. All because she believed all niggas cheated. Fuck that! If that was the case, she shouldn’t have married my black ass.

The shit got worse when I found out that she was fucking niggas I broke bread with when I was in the streets. She had me looking like a bitch ass nigga!

After I kicked her out, she went to stay with my parents, but I didn’t give a fuck. I was done. My motto was fuck bitches, and I became cold as fuck until Essence.

Fuck. I said again and dropped my head.

I honestly thought I was done with Mercy, and I did plan to eventually tell E the truth, but my parents kept telling me that I couldn’t just act like my marriage didn’t happen and kept telling me to deal with it. I wanted Mercy to just disappear, but she wouldn’t.

My heart told me to say fuck her and stay with Essence. However, my parents were right. I was married and pretending that I wasn’t wouldn’t make it go away. So, I thought trying again was the right thing to do. I just didn’t expect all this shit to happen. And I damn sure didn’t want to hurt Essence in the process.

Amario kept warning me, but I believed I had the shit all figured out. I was gonna tell Essence that I was separated, get a divorce, and stay with E. That’s what I wanted to do, and when I met Essence and knew that I wanted to be with her, that was the plan.

Shit, I hadn’t heard from Mercy since the night I kicked her out, so I thought shit was good as over. It was like as soon as I got with Essence, my pops started blowing up my shit and wanting to talk about Mercy. I didn’t even know why the fuck they allowed her to go to their house in the first place. She cheated on me! But then I started to feel bad about how I had done her. My pops said she made a mistake, and I should have at least tried to fix shit, and I agreed.

I’m sorry, E.

2

Cashmere Price

Tears rushed down my face as I stood with a wide mouth staring at Amario lying still at the bottom of the steps. Blood was spilling from everywhere it seemed, and he wasn’t moving or even groaning. My heart literally stopped right then and there, but that didn’t stop me from jumping on the masked attacker.

You killed him, you son of a bitch! I screamed as I wailed on him with all the anger and energy I could muster up.

He fought me off, and with one punch, I went flying on my ass. The wife beater I had on flew up and exposed my naked ass, which seemed to catch the intruder’s attention because he turned in my direction.

Quickly, I pulled it down to cover myself, and he just stood there staring. I couldn’t see his eyes from the dark shades he had on, but I knew he was looking at me. He still had the gun in his hand, and when my eyes fell on it, his did too. My body froze because I wondered if he was going to shoot me like he shot Amario. It didn’t help that he was just standing there breathing heavily while staring at me. Then, as if he suddenly snapped out of it, he turned around and took off down the stairs.

I immediately jumped to my feet and followed him, thinking he was going to finish off Amario. To my surprise, he continued past him and ran right out the door. I rushed over to Amario and dropped to my knees to cradle his head.

Amario, baby, please wake up. Get up, I pleaded and checked to see if he was breathing. I sighed when I saw that he was.

SOMEBODY HELP! PLEASE HELP ME!

The intruder had left the door open, so I prayed that somebody heard me. After screaming a few more times and not seeing anyone, I knew that no one was coming, and I started to panic. I was too afraid to leave Amario, but knowing I needed to get him some help, I left him and ran upstairs to get my cell and some towels to try stop the bleeding.

911, what’s your emergency?

I need an ambulance, please! Someone broke in, and they shot my boyfriend! Please help me! I begged just as I got back to Amario.

The operator instructed me on what to do to help him and told me that an ambulance was on the way.

Amario, you got to wake up, please. Don’t leave me. I just got you back. I sniveled and looked down into his face as tears fell from my eyes.

Blood continued to flow from his head and the three bullet holes to his body. I used the towels and applied pressure on both as I prayed he didn’t die on me.

Come on, Amario! Open your eyes, please!

No matter how much I pleaded with him, he kept his eyes closed.

I almost cried tears of joy when I heard the sirens coming closer, and it wasn’t long before paramedics rushed into the house since the door was still open.

Miss, let us take it from here, a paramedic said and gently pulled me away.

I reluctantly stepped back.

They jumped in and started working on him as I stared in shock.

This cannot be happening.

Just as we were finally about to make up for being apart for so long, this had to happen!

We gotta get him to the hospital now! the same female medic called out just as they placed Amario on a gurney.

They rushed for the door, and I went to run out behind them but was stopped by another paramedic.

You can’t go outside like that. Go grab some clothes and come on.

Nodding, I ran back upstairs, threw on my dress and panties, gathered Amario’s clothes since he was only in his boxers, and ran back downstairs.

I climbed into the back of the ambulance, and it quickly sped away from the house as the sirens blared.

They continued to work on Amario, and all I could do was close my eyes and pray he made it.

A little while later, we arrived at the hospital. They pulled him out and rushed through the doors, and I was asked to wait.

My nerves were getting the best of me, and I found myself pacing. All type of thoughts ran